This is stewpid! 'ow can oi still be finkin' about 'er? Oi only seen her for a second. It had been a whole day and Mungojerrie still couldn't get the white queen out of his mind. Every time he closed his eyes he could see her huddled in a corner crying, alone and afraid. He hadn't been able to concentrate on anything else. As soon as he got home Mungojerrie had gone to his den and stayed there for the rest of the day. Now it was late afternoon of the following day and he was still in his den obsessing over how to help a queen he'd only ever caught a glimpse of once.

Slowly he got up and crossed his den to get a drink of water from the bucket by the door. It was empty as he had forgotten to refill it the day before. Mungojerrie sighed and sat looking out over the Junkyard. He shouldn't let it get to him so much. Macavity had kept plenty of other cats prisoner over the years Mungojerrie had worked for him and none of them had ever made him feel so...He paused. How did he feel? Useless? No that was the wrong word. Angry? No he wasn't really angry. Protective? That was better. Protective. He wanted to protect this unknown queen from Macavity, but how? What could he do to help her? Nothing, there was nothing he could do. He'd seen what happened to prisoners when Macavity got bored of them. The though made him shudder.

"Are you alright, Jerrie?", a quiet voice asked making him jump. Tantomile came to sit beside him and lent her head supportively against his shoulder. It was a pointless question really because the psychic queen knew he wasn't alright but it was an invitation to talk about what was bothering him if he wanted to.

Mungojerrie sighed and shifted his weight so he was snuggling against his friend. She always made him feel better when he was upset without even trying. It was something about the way she seemed to radiate calm and was never sad herself that cheered him up. "Oi don't know." He shrugged and lent his cheek against the top of the smaller cats head. "It were sumfink oi seen yesterday. It were a little queen and she were sad and oi wish oi could 'elp 'er." He stopped. It was difficult to talk about where he had seen the queen even though Tantomile knew that he worked for Macavity. The others didn't know and he didn't want them to find out. Saying they would not be happy was an understatement, they'd be furious.

Tantomile looked up out the corner of her eye at the calico tom and put her paw on his. Normally he was so enthusiastic and happy that it worried her when he was sad. Clearly this queen had made a big impression on him if he was still depressed a day later. "Why can't you help her?", Tantomile wanted to know.

"She's a prisoner and oi don't know 'ow ter rescue 'er. Even if oi did oi doubt she'd trust me." Mungojerrie stood up and walked a few steps away from his friend to look vaguely into the distance. He knew it was no use. He'd never even be able to find out who she was let alone save her from Macavity. Absent-mindedly he watched Pouncival and Etcetera playing with a rubber ball.

Without Mungojerrie noticing Tantomile came to stand beside him. "I didn't think you were the type to give up." At that the tom glanced quickly down at her. He hated the thought of giving up and the queen knew that. It had the desired effect, the sad look vanished from his face to be replaced by a look of steely determination. Pleased with herself Tantomile smiled. "If you need any help at all don't hesitate to ask." She reached up and licked Mungojerrie's cheek affectionately, turned and was gone before he had time to thank her.

She's right. Oi'll fink of a plan. It can't be that 'ard. Mungojerrie began to pace up and down outside his den. He felt confident he would be able to think of something. All he had to do was think of it as if he was planning a burglary. Before he could get any further with his plans he was interrupted by Tumblebrutus who came over and sat down beside him. The young tom looked nervous and was playing with the dirt at his paws avoiding looking directly at his friend. "Woss up, Tumble?", Mungojerrie asked curiously when the other tom made no attempt to start speaking and just continued to stare at the floor.

"I was wondering if you were ok," Tumblebrutus muttered almost too quietly for Mungojerrie to hear him.

Genuinely baffled the calico tom racked his brain for anything he had done that might be worrying Tumblebrutus. There was nothing obvious he could think of. Maybe Tumblebrutus had done something he thought might upset Mungojerrie? "Oi'm fine, Tumble. Why wouldn't oi be?"

Looking embarrassed Tumblebrutus glanced at his friend and quickly away again. "You didn't get up on time this morning," he practically whispered, "In fact nobody's seen you since yesterday, until now obviously. I thought you might be sad because Teaz had gone and I thought you might be angry with me because she had come to live with me." He hung his head looking dejected.

It was certainly not what Mungojerrie had been expecting him to say and he almost felt like laughing it was so far from what was actually wrong. He was happy for Rumpleteazer and definitely not angry with Tumblebrutus. He didn't laugh though, he patted the other toms paw awkwardly. "O'course oi'm not angry wiv yer. Oi just didn't feel great this mornin', that's all."

Immediately Tumblebrutus brightened up. "So you're not cross?" When Mungojerrie shook his head Tumblebrutus' face broke into a grin. "I'll see you later then." He laughed and got to his feet very relieved that they were still friends. Waving he bounded away across the Junkyard towards Plato who had just come back from a hunting trip, leaving Mungojerrie alone again.

Finally some time ter ffink. Oi'll just... A ball came sailing through the air and smacked into the side of Mungojerrie's head. Startling him and knocking him off balance so he fell backwards and landed uncomfortably in the dirt. When he struggled back up into a sitting position Pouncival and Etcetera were sat opposite him identical mischievous grins on their little faces. "Wot were that for?", he exclaimed and swatted at the two kittens with his paw. They jumped back giggling and Etcetera stuck her tongue out at Mungojerrie.

"It was an accident," Pouncival insisted innocently but the fact both kittens were trying as hard as they could not to laugh made Mungojerrie think it probably wasn't.

Picking up the ball he tossed it as far as he could. It hit an old sofa and rolled down into a stack of paint cans where it vanished from view. "Go and play." Not needing to be told twice Pouncival and Etcetera sped off after the ball. For a few minutes Mungojerrie watched them rummaging through paint cans searching for their toy but lost interest when they found it and began to roll it around the Junkyard again. Stretching out in a warm patch of sunlight and closing his eyes he tried to give the impression he was asleep so he would have time to think undisturbed. First oi need ter find a way ter talk ter her, he decided, Oi can't do anyfink if she don't trust me and want me 'elp. That means oi need ter spend more time workin' for Macavity so that 'e'll let me near 'er. Maybe oi could offer ter help out by takin' 'er 'er food or sumfink. It's worff a go. Happy that he had made a decision and had a plan of action, at least for now, Mungojerrie yawned and settled down for an actual nap. He'd need to be rested if he was actually going to go through with this. Oi'll fink of 'ow ter actually rescue 'er wen oi know she wants me 'elp, he thought just before he dozed off.

"Wake up, Jerrie!" Slowly Mungojerrie opened his eyes. A small paw was vigorously shaking him and he could hear Rumpleteazer's voice telling him to get up. For a moment he was confused as to where he was, whatever he was lying on was uncomfortable and hard and he was colder than he should have been. Also he noticed he was wet. Drizzle was falling on him and his thick fur was already soaked through. Then the tom remembered falling asleep in front of his den in the sun. That was why it wasn't warm and comfortable, he was asleep on an old wooden crate outside and at some point it must have started raining. Stiffly he clambered to his feet and stretched his painfully aching muscles.

"Me back's killin' me," he complained grumpily and glared accusingly at his best friend who was trying her best not to laugh at his untidy and bedraggled appearance, "Yer could 'ave woken me a bit sooner."

"Don't look so cross, Jerrie. Yer look good wet," Rumpleteazer giggled. She dodged nimbly out the way as the tom aimed a paw at her head and laughed. "Let's go inside and get some food. Oi'm stavin'." Without waiting for an invitation the little calico queen slipped into Mungojerrie's den and began to rummage through the food he had left until she found something she wanted.

With an exasperated sigh her friend shook the water out his fur and followed her inside. Leaving Rumpleteazer to look for something to eat Mungojerrie went to find something to dry himself off with. When he came back the queen had fetched two portions of food and a warm blanket and was sat huddled under the rug playing with her food. For somebody who had said she was starving she didn't look very keen on eating. Slipping under the blanket beside her Mungojerrie began to gobble his food. He only realised now exactly how hungry he actually was, after all he hadn't eaten since they day before.

"Jerrie, can oi talk ter yer?", Rumpleteazer asked after a few minutes of watching the tom eat. She had a distracted look on her face. Something was clearly bothering her.

"O'course yer can. Woss the matter?" Mungojerrie stopped eating and looked up at Rumpleteazer. He knew her well enough to know when she was upset by something. Moving closer to her he wrapped an arm round her shoulders and hugged her tightly.

"It's Tumble..." Rumpleteazer stopped and looked down at her paws.

"Woss 'e done? If 'e's done anyfink ter hurt yer oi'll...", Mungojerrie began angrily jumping to his feet, his fur standing furiously on end.

"No, no, it's nuffink like that!" Looking alarmed the queen grabbed her friend before he could march out the den and do anything violent to Tumblebrutus. "We were talkin' about the future yesterday and 'e said 'e wanted kittens," she quickly clarified.

"Oh." Mungojerrie sat down again sheepishly. "Sorry."

"That's ok." She waved away his apology. "Anyway 'e wants kittens but oi'm not sure oi do. Wot do oi say ter him?"

This is orkward, Mungojerrie thought, How should oi know wot ter say ter him? He's 'er mate. The thought of giving relationship advice was absolutely horrifying to the poor tom. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat and tried to avoid looking at his friend. Having had no personal experience with this kind of situation he had no idea what you were supposed to say. Why couldn't Rumpleteazer just tell Tumblebrutus like she had just told him? It couldn't be that hard. Then they could discuss it together without having to involve anybody else. She's waitin' for an answer. Say sumfink, Jerrie, he tried to tell himself but no noise came out when he opened his mouth.

"Yer don't 'ave ter talk ter me if yer don't want to," Rumpleteazer said. She sounded very hurt and looked like she thought Mungojerrie had let her down. As she got up to leave Mungojerrie noticed her eyes were full of tears.

"Teaz, oi'd luv ter help yer. Oi just don't know wot ter say that's 'elpful. Yer know oi'm not right good wiv emotional stuff." Grabbing her arm to stop her from leaving Mungojerrie pulled his friend into another hug. "Just tell 'im 'ow yer feel. 'e'll understand." ...Oi 'ope.

Rumpleteazer gave him a watery grin. "Yer fink?"

"Course." ...Oi 'ave no idea. Please don't ask me anyfink else.

"Thanks, Jerrie. Yor such a great friend...", Rumpleteazer paused looking embarrassed, "...Jerrie..."

"Yeah?" ...Oh no.

"About having kittens...", she blushed and avoided his gaze.

"Yeah?" ...Wot can she want ter know now?

There was a long pause before Rumpleteazer could actually ask her question. "...How do you actually have kittens?"

"Um..." ...This can't be 'appenin'.

"It's just me mum wouldn't talk ter me about it." The little queen got up and came to sit right in front of Mungojerrie so he couldn't avoid her gaze.

The tom just stared at her a look of complete horror on his face. How could she not know that? Did she actually expect him to tell her?

Rumpleteazer blinked up at Mungojerrie with big innocent eyes. "Please tell me."

"W-well..." ...Wot do oi say? Wot do oi say? "...Wen...two...um...people..." ...Oi can't do this! "Um...luv each uvver very much..." ...Help! Why couldn't Jenny 'ave told 'er this? "...um...they...um...get certain..." ...Oi want ter disappear. "...u-urges..." ...Please don't look at me. "...and they...um...do things." ...Shit! He went bright red and turned away quickly picking up some rubbish off the floor and playing with it so he wouldn't have to look at his friend.

His ears flicked as he thought he heard a snort from behind him. Whirling round Mungojerrie caught Rumpleteazer with her paw stuffed into her mouth trying to laugh quietly without him noticing.

When she realised he'd caught her she gave up on trying to be quiet and collapsed on the floor tears of laughter streaming down her cheeks. "Yor face," she managed to gasp after a few minutes and dissolved back into helpless giggles.

"That's not funny, Teaz. Oi fought yer were actually askin' me, yer idiot," Mungojerrie snapped quite relieved that it had only been a joke. His best friend could be such a pain when she wanted to be.

Regaining a tiny bit of self-control Rumpleteazer managed to sit up again and wipe her eyes. "Oi just couldn't miss the opportunity. Yer were so embarrassed wen oi asked yer about relationships." She began to giggle again at the far from pleased expression on Mungojerrie's face.

"If yer tell anyone about this..." Mungojerrie playfully shoved Rumpleteazer over so she fell in a heap on the floor then jumped on her and pulled her tail. She rolled over, grabbed his ear in her teeth and tugged on it. Together the two calicos rolled around the den batting at each other with their paws and trying to nip each other's tails or ears. They crashed into a large china lamp stood in one corner and sent it flying plunging them instantly into darkness with a loud crash of breaking pottery. Both cats froze, Rumpleteazer sat on Mungojerrie and Mungojerrie with Rumpleteazer's tail in his mouth.

"Oops," Rumpleteazer giggled and climbed off her friend pulling her tail out of his mouth, "Oi ffink we broke sumfink." She moved forwards to get a torch and stepped straight onto a large sharp shard of pottery. Letting out a shriek of pain Rumpleteazer jumped back clutching at her injured paw and tripped over Mungojerrie in the dark. With a loud crack her head smacked into the floor knocking her out.

"Teaz!" Frantically Mungojerrie felt around in the dark for his friend, careful not to hurt himself on the broken lamp, until he found her lying just to his left. Quickly he scooped her up and inched his way towards the exit to the den carefully avoiding the china littering the floor. Now his eyes had adjusted to the dark it didn't take long to get outside and climb down from the pile of junk his den was in to the clearing below. With a whimper Rumpleteazer stirred and slowly woke up looking very dazed and confused. "Are yer alright?", the tom demanded as he hurried towards Jennyanydots' den, "Yer 'ave ter be more careful."

"Oi'm fine," Rumpleteazer muttered and snuggled into Mungojerrie's chest burying her face in his warm fur.

They reached Jennyanydots' den and Mungojerrie knocked as loudly as he could hoping they weren't waking anybody up because of some stupid, avoidable accident. On the plus side though Skimbleshanks was away so if they were disturbing somebody it would only be Jennyanydots who would have had to get up to treat her daughter's injury anyway. Secretly Mungojerrie was glad that Skimble wasn't there. He hated the way the tabby always blamed him for everything that happened to Rumpleteazer even if it usually was her own stupid fault.

"Who is it? Has something happened?" Jennyanydots pulled the door open still clutching a cup of tea and a book. When she saw who it was she looked momentarily alarmed until Rumpleteazer looked up at her and gave her an embarrassed grin. Rolling her eyes the older queen stepped to one side to allow them to enter. "What did she do this time?", she asked Mungojerrie as his carried his best friend over to a pile of cushions and carefully put her down.

"She cut 'er por and knocked 'erself out." Jennyanydots bustled over with some water and bandages and bent down to look at the injured paw tutting and muttering about carelessness and clumsiness. "Will she be ok?", Mungojerrie wanted to know. Probably, he thought as he watched Rumpleteazer animatedly chatting to her mother while she cleaned and bandaged the cut.

Jennyanydots smiled at him. "She'll be absolutely fine, Jerrie. No harm done. Go back to bed and get some sleep. I'll take Rumpleteazer back to her den when I've finished this." She waved a paw at the small stack of bandages beside her.

"Yor not gonna use all them are yer?" The patient looked horrified. "I won't be able ter move me 'oole leg."

"Should have thought of that before you went and had a stupid accident," her mother told her sternly but winked at Mungojerrie when Rumpleteazer wasn't looking. "Good night. See you tomorrow."

"Night." Rumpleteazer waved cheerfully. As she did so Mungojerrie noticed some of the bandages from the stack had gone missing and grinned. Typical.

"Good night, Teaz. Good night, Jenny." The tom left the den and wandered back home. So much for bein' rested. Oi'll 'ave ter start me plan tomorrow even if oi am tired. Yawning Mungojerrie collapsed into bed and was asleep before his head hit the pillow.