Loki opened his eyes groggily. He was slumped over Tony's bed, and had the mother of all cricks in his neck. He grunted and slowly lifted himself upright, grimacing as he rotated his neck. A moment of hesitation as he searched within himself and he sighed, finding his magic coming back, slowly but surely. He didn't have enough to help Tony heal completely yet, and that was his main goal. He looked down at the man in the bed and slowly reached a hand to caress his cheek, afraid that it had all been a dream.
Tony's eyes fluttered and Loki sighed in relief. It hadn't been a dream, Tony was awake, out of the abyss. He stood up and groaned as he stretched, hearing several things pop and twinge. He turned back when he heard what he thought was a whine from the bed. Confused, he leaned over Tony and caught it again. A distressed whine in his throat, a minute turn of his head, eyes fluttering as he was ensnared by disturbing memories that returned to haunt him in his dreams.
"Shhh, Tony, it's alright, you're alright." Loki whispered, hoping his voice could calm the man. Tony stilled and his eyes fluttered open a crack. Loki gazed down at him anxiously. Bruce had warned him about the damage that could've been inflicted from the beatings Tony had taken, and they had no way of knowing just what could have been damaged.
Tony's hand moved, and Loki gripped it, watching as Tony's eyes slid shut once again, and he fell back to sleep. Loki sighed and sat back in the chair by his bed, his eyes never moving from Tony's face.
Tony's first conscious thought was of the pain. It surrounded him, blinded him, but also told him he was alive. He struggled to bring the most recent events to the front, knowing they were important for some reason. He remembered a garden, a woman and a path. There was a sound that came from somewhere around his legs and he paused, puzzled. He then realized his eyes were closed and began the process of opening them. For something so small, it was an arduous task, and when he finally managed it, he found himself blinking rapidly to clear the tears from how bright it seemed.
His small grunt at the light awoke the person sleeping on his bed, and Tony saw a blurred form move around and lower the intensity of the lights. Tony sighed in relief before blinking a few times more. Finally able to see clearly, he squinted and looked around. He was in the medical bay it seemed.
"Tony?" a soft voice asked. He turned his head slowly, struggling to maintain his grip on consciousness. He saw a familiar shape at his side.
"Wha?" He grunted questioningly. Or rather, tried to. It came out rather garbled. Loki leaned closer, and his face took shape in Tony's line of sight. It was worried, Loki brushing his face with a cool hand. Tony sighed. It felt nice.
"Tony, you're too warm. I'm going to call Bruce in."
Tony tried to raise an arm and keep that familiar presence by his bed, but he was too weak. He grew frustrated, but couldn't do anything but growl and toss his head. There was a tingling sensation all over, like the blood rushing back into his veins, and he stilled, exhausted just by his small efforts. Before he knew it, his eyes were closing and he was falling into the darkness once more.
Loki strode back into the room, explaining to Bruce what he had felt and seen when Tony woke up. He stopped short at the sight of the man once again asleep on the bed, and couldn't stop his expression from falling. Bruce clapped a hand on his shoulder, but Loki couldn't stop his expression from becoming guarded, stuffing all emotion behind a curtain.
"This is normal," Bruce commented calmly. "He's doing well for the damage that was inflicted. You said he was able to speak?"
Loki nodded. "He spoke, but it wasn't clear, and he looked like he was having trouble seeing with how bright the room was. Also, he couldn't move normally. My magic is almost strong enough to help him out, but it won't be soon enough for me."
Bruce looked at him thoughtfully. "Well, for the most part, he'll be out of it, so at least there's that. By the time he's waking up and conscious of the pain, you'll be able to help him, right?"
Loki nodded, expression easing a bit at the realization. They both whipped their heads around at a noise from the bed, and strode over to it. Bruce took one look at Tony's face, twisted with pain and body straining away from something they couldn't see or hear. He looked back at Loki and stopped himself from comforting the god that the nightmares were probably going to be normal too. Loki had a dark foreboding expression on his face, and Bruce didn't imagine knowing that it would be normal for Tony to have nightmares about being tortured would ease his own self torture.
"He needs you right now. Your voice does something for him you know. Go on, talk to him, be there for him. He's going to need just that in the coming weeks more than your magic" the doctor commented softly before walking out. Loki looked back at him before shuffling to Tony's side and taking his hand.
"The sooner you get your ass out of this bed, the sooner I can tell you what a bastard you are for doing this to me," Loki said softly. He watched with some amazement as Tony stilled, his pained thrashing ceasing. He continued to talk, not even aware of what he was saying and watched as Tony's face turned towards him and slowly relaxed until he was breathing deeper and steadier.
Several days passed, in which Loki was a constant presence by Tony's bedside, most of the time murmuring to him until he went hoarse. Tony slept deeply and soundly most of the time with the god by his side. Bruce continued to monitor his vitals, lifting an eyebrow at the improvements he saw occasionally. Loki had apparently recovered enough to help in a small way. However, the majority of his injuries were still there, if a bit less severe.
It was about a week or so later when Tony was finally able to open his eyes and stay conscious for longer than five minutes. The first thing he noticed was that it was dark in the room, with only a small light in the corner illuminating the shape on his bed. He had to blink several times, but came to realize it was Loki, slumped over his legs asleep. The movement of him shifting woke the immortal, and he gazed blearily at Tony before realizing he was awake.
Eyes widening, Loki sat up and scooted closer. "Tony?" He asked softly, waiting for the man to fall back asleep as he had done on several previous occasions.
"How long?" Tony rasped. The words stumbled out of his mouth, but were as clear as he could make them.
"It's been about two weeks since I brought you back." Loki said simply, eyes never moving from Tony's face.
"What..." Tony paused, face twisting as he struggled to form the words. "What... happened?" he finally gasped out. He moved an arm, struggling to sit up, and fell back with a bitten back yelp.
"Careful!" Loki chastised, moving to help him. As gentle as he was, it didn't stop Tony from biting his lip so hard it bled by the time they got him sitting up. Loki winced and wiped it away gently before answering his question.
"You remember being kidnapped by Doom?" Loki asked, receiving a nod in response. "I... I'm not completely certain how long you were there, or what they did to you. I couldn't extract revenge for you. I'm sorry. But I brought you back here and you went into a coma." Loki paused, still uncertain as to how he felt about that word, and how to express what he had felt at being told Tony might not wake up.
Tony's hand was moving, shaking as it made its way towards his face. Loki took hold of it and just stood there, gazing down at their linked fingers. "You almost died on me, you bastard." It was a haggard confession, whispered so quietly Tony wasn't sure he had heard right at first. He was unsure how to handle this side of Loki, the one that seemed so on edge and concerned for his safety. Nonetheless, he tugged him closer with what little strength he had, and motioned for the god to lay down beside him. The bed was not a standard hospital bed, so Tony was lying on a plush mattress that was just under full size, with more than enough room for Loki to slip in beside him.
Loki slid in carefully, keeping a careful watch on Tony's face to make sure he wasn't jolting him. He finally settled in with a sigh, and Tony moved his head to lean against his shoulder before heaving a sigh himself and closing his eyes. Loki's body relaxed, relieved at not being in the twisted position that normally happened when he fell asleep in the chair. Within minutes, they were both asleep, much to the bemusement of Bruce, who came in to check on Tony a few minutes later.
A week later, Loki stretched as he woke up and turned to look at Tony. It had become a regular occurrence for him to sleep beside the man now, and they both seemingly slept better for it. Bruce had reported a dramatic improvement in all Tony's vitals and the injuries and the broken bones were healing up nicely, as were the whip marks. Loki winced at the thought of them. While his magic was still not strong enough to go through a major healing ritual, he could do small things, and that included closing up the gashes on Tony's body so they didn't keep reopening and bleeding. Tony was a restless sleeper, and it had happened many times.
Loki also preferred to do it while he was asleep for the pain it caused Tony. Healing broken bones was no laughing matter, magic or no magic. It drained both of them, and inflicted pain on Tony as his body went through the process.
"How's he doing?"
Loki looked up at the voice. It was Natasha, who had slipped in while he was lost in thought.
"Better, I think." He replied thoughtfully.
"I can keep watch if you want to take a break," she offered quietly. Loki nodded and muttered a thanks as he made his way out. He was in sore need of a shower and food, and the past couple weeks had cemented his opinion that Natasha was someone he could trust for the most part.
"Brother! Good of you to join us. We are breaking our fast, come and sit down!" Thor boomed as he made his way past the dining room. Loki hesitated, wondering if he should take a shower or eat first. The smell of whatever was cooking reached his nostrils and his mouth watered.
'Food first, then a shower,' He thought, letting his nose lead the way to the dining room.
Loki was in the shower two hours later when the alarm sounded.
"Avengers, assemble." was broadcasted through the entire tower. Loki immediately shut off the water and rushed to get dressed. Natasha would need to leave the medical bay to respond to the call, and he didn't want Tony by himself.
Tony was awoken by the speakers in the medical bay blaring the "Avengers, assemble.". His brain went on auto pilot, used to stumbling out of bed at all hours of the night to answer that call. He had swung his legs over the side before the pain made itself known. His feet made contact with the floor, and immediately buckled under the weight, weak from being confined to the bed for the last few weeks.
'Must... get up. Avengers... need me..'he thought fuzzily. Blackness swooped in to claim him, and he sank into it with a weary sigh.
"Tony! TONY!" The voice was frantic, and there was someone patting his cheek. "Tony, come on, don't do this to me. I just got you back." Was breathed quieter, but he heard it nonetheless. He opened his eyes and immediately shut them, moaning at the light. There was a curse and the brightness behind his eyes ceased.
"Loki?" He whispered hoarsely.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Loki asked him, sounding furious.
"Avengers... were called." Tony gritted out. Apparently his pain meds had worn off. The waves of pain were making spots appear in front of his eyes.
"Tony... Tony, focus! I can't lift you onto the bed by myself, as much as I wish I could." Loki said sharply, softening towards the end.
Tony grimaced, but moved to put an arm around Loki's shoulders. Once they were situated, Loki slowly stood, hating the expression that passed over Tony's face. His body wasn't thanking him for any of this, and they both knew it. Loki turned them slightly so Tony was able to lay back on the bed. He did so, and Loki helped him move so his head was on the pillows once more. They both stopped and breathed a sigh of relief once the ordeal was over.
"Why... are you still here?" Tony questioned weakly. His heart was beating rather fast, and given the amount of pain he was in, he couldn't tell what hurt and what didn't.
"What do you mean?" Loki asked with no small amount of confusion.
"I'm just a broken mortal, I can barely stay awake long enough to manage a word or two. Why do you stay when there's nothing for you here?"
Loki paused before he spoke, feeling faintly hurt. "Were we not in a relationship?" He questioned quietly.
Tony turned away, brows furrowed. "I didn't quite figure this happening into the terms and conditions. I would understand if you didn't want to stick around."
Loki growled. "You are mine. That bastard took you from me, and I will not tolerate it happening again. That means I'm staying here, whether you like it or not."
He made to move away, to puzzle over what Tony was trying to say, but a hand shot out, surprisingly fast for the weakened state Tony was in, and clutched his shirt. He paused, not looking back.
"Please. I don't know what keeps you here by my side, but I know I would be lost without you. Dead actually, if you hadn't found me." Tony whispered.
Loki growled, knowing all the while that it was true. "I couldn't let you die." he told the man quietly.
"Why not? I'm sure there's a lot of people who would be happier for it," Tony said raggedly.
"Because you..." Loki faltered, the revelation he was about to speak still new to him. "You ground me. The darkness... it doesn't go away. It lingers, lurking in the corner of my mind, sometimes it whispers, sometimes it screams. But when I'm with you, it's no longer able to tighten its hold on me, show me the madness that's lurking underneath. I stand on a precipice between madness and a semblance of sanity."
Tony was quiet behind him, but kept his grip on the back of Tony's shirt. Loki turned around, and found him looking up at the god with a broken expression.
"Tony?"
"I..." the man stumbled over his words, and they piled up in his throat. He growled in frustration before taking a breath as Bruce had told him to and clearing his mind. "I can't be that for you. It... it wouldn't be prudent, to make someone like me the key to something like that. God knows I'm barely able to keep myself sane, much less help you keep your sanity."
"But that's exactly it," Loki breathed, moving to Tony's side and brushing a hand over his face. "We keep each other balanced." He leaned down, touching his forehead to Tony's, feeling the slightly overheated brow smooth at his touch.
"I didn't realize how invested you were." Tony said quietly.
"How invested are you?" Loki asked curiously, turning the question on him. Tony shifted and turned around to stare in the other direction. Loki climbed into the bed beside him, careful not to jostle him unduly.
"I... couldn't say." Tony said finally. Loki looked at him, confused.
"What exactly is that supposed to mean?"
"It means that I'm shit at discussing emotions. Just ask Pepper, I'm sure she would be happy to tell you of all the times I failed at it." Tony said, slightly bitter.
Tony..." Loki reached out and touched his shoulder, trying to suppress the hurt when the man flinched.
"It hurts, ok?" Tony growled, turning back to face him with a wince, and oh, Loki hated not being able to help his lover heal.
"What exactly hurts?" Loki said softly.
"The thought of you leaving. I don't know how I would survive that." Tony said. Loki was silent, so Tony continued, lost in the pain that washed over him at the thought of what would happen if he knew Loki wasn't coming back.
"The thought of you leaving... I wouldn't survive that. It's so incredibly easy to end it." Tony said while brushing his arc reactor with his finger tips. He found himself pinned down suddenly, Loki's eyes flashing down at him.
"Never! Do you hear me? Don't you dare do that! Don't even think about it!" Loki snarled at him. Tony blinked owlishly up at him. Loki sighed and rolled to the side, not able to face Tony with his thoughts running amok.
"Just stay by my side and we'll both be fine," he said simply, after a couple minutes had passed. An arm snaked around his waist, and he rolled to face Tony.
"Seems we're stuck with each other, for as long as I'm around." Tony said with a weary smile. Loki sighed and shook his head slightly, eyes going dark for a second.
"Loki?"
The god shook it off with a smile and brushed his lips against Tony's forehead. "Sleep. Your body needs to heal."
Tony sighed and relaxed. Within minutes, his breathing was slow and deep. Loki held him through the night, mind going over the fact that a mortal held him and his sanity in strong, but short lived arms.
Hai guys! So I'm writing this up, have a fairly simple plot outlined for this chapter, when.. bam. I just... vomited all kinds of feels in there. I zoned out writing, and then come back and find that. Heh. Enjoy?
So sorry for the late update, got caught up in the holiday bustle, and the relief of being out of school. Only one more semester to go, can't believe it. Anyways, thanks for being so patient, and for the great response to last chapter! Hope everyone had a great Christmas, and have a Happy New Years!
