Chapter Three: Voices in Your Head
Hatter: We have returned with your third chapter.
Alice: Dude you know you're talking to no one right
Hatter: Dude, you know you're just hatin on me
Alice: Yes… Yes I do.
Hatter: You know what, One day I'm gonna go solo and you'll miss me.
Alice: Pfft. May I remind you whose computer you're using? That's right… Mines! So you won't be going anywhere my nitendo.
Hatter: Okay first- it's 'Mine' not 'Mines'. Drop the Baltimore accent already. And second- who was it who spilled their double espresso on my computer at Starbucks ©? That's right… You!
Alice: That was never proven! Please enjoy 'Freakn Perfect' chapter three.
I sat with my knees pulled to my chest. The roof was cold today, showing winter was on its way. But my left shoulder burned from Trent's touch.
No he didn't have some special heat powers or something. Well, at least not as far as I knew, but I doubted it. No his touch simply hurt because… it was his.
I chewed at my bottom lip, deep in thought. 'You can't let this go on' a voice warned me in my head ' This isn't right. You know it. You don't deserve this.'
'What do I deserve? ' I counter thought ' Do people like me deserve anything?'
'Everyone deserves to be treated like a human being. Like they're worth something.' The voice advanced.
I shook my head silently, dismissing it 'I'm not worth anything anymore.'
My debate with myself was silenced when I heard footsteps behind me. I whipped my neck behind me, a small fear burning inside me believing the source of my pain was behind me.
The fear simmered a bit when I saw the real sneak. "Butch?" I call shocked to see him there.
His green eyes narrowed at me, assessing my presence, apparently just as surprised to see me as I was him.
"What are you doing up here?" his voice low and rough. Had it always been like that? I never really noticed.
"Um, I just needed some air." I explained quickly hugging my knees closer to me.
He made a sound indicting he accepted my answer. "I didn't peg you for the type to skip" . I looked Butch over and noticed he was taping his foot, a habit I assumed that remained from his childhood when he would twitch excitedly before a fight.
"Why are you up here?" I questioned, this was the fifth time I was up here and I had never seen Butch up here.
He gave me a bored expression before digging in his jacket pocket and retrieving a small green rectangular package with a camel on it.
I blink, absorbing what he's showing me. "You smoke?"
He takes out one of the tobacco sticks and places it in the corner of his mouth. " Naw, I'm quitting." He says sarcastically as he lights it and inhales the smoke.
I frown at his tone and turn around . "Forget it." I say ending our conversation.
'Why am I even talking to him.' I thought miserably 'I'm definitely not in the mood for this.'
I heard him chuckle lightly before he walks over and sits next to me. " Calm down babe, I was only joking." He smirks.
I continue to frown at him. 'Did he really just call me babe?'
"So what's on your mind?" he asks blowing out a neat circle of smoke.
"What makes you think something's on my mind." I ask, mentally smacking myself for continuing to talk to him.
" 'Cause no one 'needs some air', unless something's wrong." He says explaining his logic.
I lick my lips, now chapped from my teeth's recent activity "Why does it matter to you." I ask, a bit annoyed and confused by Butch's sudden interest in me. Sure we sat at lunch and talked occasionally but never outside the cafeteria. It was like some unspoken rule I only seemed to see at the moment.
Butch shrugs while his eyes calmly scanned the parking lot below us, taking another drag from his cigarette "Keeping the conversation going I guess."
'This is unbelievable' I thought, scratching irritably at my ripped lips , ' I'm never going to understand boys.'
I remained silent for a few more seconds before muttering "Life."
"Life?" he repeats raising an eyebrow at me.
"Yes Life. Sometime s…. Sometimes you just need a breather from life." I sighed and stretched my legs out from their position " I don't know why am I even telling you this?"
"Maybe it's because I'm so irresistible." He smirks looking at me with his green eyes.
I felt myself gulp. Why were they so… beautiful. Was that even possible on a guy? I force myself to look away from him, not trusting my eyes at the moment. "I doubt that." I replied dryly.
'Why can't I shut up with him? And since when is Butch such a talker? Okay so maybe he's not blabbing but this was a lot from him. What did he want?'
My chest hitches at that last thought. 'What did he want?'
Suddenly I stood up, alarming Butch. Panic rose in me and my breaths were coming out short like I was hyperventilating.
'They always want something.' A voice echoed loudly in my head 'Always'
Sensing my distress Butch stood up too. "Hey are you okay?" he reached for my shoulder and I lost it.
I jumped back from him, my body shaking like a leaf. "D-Don't touch me!" I snap, glaring at him like I was a wild animal "Just-Just Leave me alone!"
With that I flew away. I flew faster then I even knew I could, leaving behind a confused Butch alone on the roof.
Along with all my stuff.
"Your home pretty early." Blossom observed when she walked into our room. I simply nodded my head not looking up from my book. Blossom didn't press forward, not like I expected her to. She tended to stay out of Buttercup's and my life to the point you wouldn't guess we were sisters.
On the other hand, she didn't mind telling us every detail of her life. Blossom quickly launched into to some story of how someone stole her calculus teacher's chair.
"Where's Buttercup?" I asked bringing Blossom out of the mist of her story.
She pursed her lips together, upset I stopped her from talking, and shrugged "How should I know. Probably hanging out with those thugs she calls friends."
"Oh." I say knowing the thugs she was referring to specifically were the RowdyRuff boys. Blossom never came near the boys, she said she just didn't trust them but Buttercup thought it was because she saw them as competition for her popularity.
"Anyways, I'm leaving. Some friends and I are going to the mall for a few hours." She said grabbing a jacket from our closet.
"Oh." I repeat.
"You wanna come. It'll be so much fun."
Okay so she didn't say that last part. I kind of made it up in my mind. Blossom never invites me or Buttercup to hang out with her – especially with her friends around. What she really said was "Tell the Professor I'll be home by curfew" before leaving the house.
I didn't even get a chance to tell her the Professor had gone out himself. I was completely alone in the house.
I sat still in the empty abyss of my room. Silence echoing loudly throughout the house. I hated being alone- bad things always happened when I was by myself.
I chewed nervously at my lip, forcing myself to read the book in my hands as not to let my mind wonder. I always feared the worst before it could even happen.
'Calm down Bubbles-Just calm down' I soothed myself as I looked at the black and white intently.
Tap Tap…. Tap Tap
'What was that!' I thought snapping my head towards the windows above me, a shiver running down my back until I rethought it 'No it's just my imagination, it has to be'. Sometimes my mind was my worst enemy. Though despite my own assurance I still gripped the book tighter and stared harder into the pages.
Tap Tap…. Tap Tap
I gripped harder.
Tap Tap…. Tap Tap
And Harder.
TAP TAP TAP!
I closed my book abruptly. I was no longer interested in its content at the moment.
I sat sill for a few moments thinking and over thinking the situation. Praying for a plausible reason for this occurrence, any at all.
And then it came.
"I'm… I'm on second floor, no one would- could tap the window unless… unless they were…. Buttercup!" I exclaimed tears of rejoice practically springing to my eyes in my ignorant realization.
I moved to opened the window to let my sister in. When I loosen the latch and held it open a flash of green light quickly flew in but it wasn't definitely not my sister.
"God, do you know how cold it is out there." He complained, keeping his hands jammed in his pocket.
"Butch." I breathed, shaken completely at his presence as I just started at him.
He didn't seem to notice and just went on. "Man, I've been waiting outside forever. I saw your sister come in so I was waiting for her to leave so I could do this."
Fear clouded my eyes. "W-what? Why did you have to w-wait for Blossom to leave?"
'I knew it. I knew no good came from being by myself. It's always the same.' I thought frantically.
Butch smirked to himself, not realizing fear. "Well, Red doesn't exactly have a high opinion of me. Anyways I just had to give you something."
"S-something?" I stuttered backing up only to have the back of my knees hit my bed.
"Yeah, here." He walked towards me so I was trapped between him and my bed.
I felt my heart quicken. 'I won't let it happen again- I'll use my powers if I have to. This time for sure.' I thought, tightening my fist as fiercely as I could.
Butch unzipped his jacket and retrieved something he'd been keeping inside.
"You left this on the roof." He said presenting with the object he'd pulled from his jacket.
My body loosen a bit as I looked at what he held. It was a small brown sketchbook with my name etched neatly on it. I looked at the book and then at Butch and then back at the book. I stared at it. Assessing what was going on "The roof?" I questioned confused.
Butch raised an eyebrow at me, amusement hinting his face " Yeah, the roof. Remember? Where you freaked out on me and flew off without your stuff."
I remembered. But I was still confused.
"So…you brought it… to me? That's it?" I asked.
"Well kind of. I gave Buttercup most of your stuff but I forgot this… and l figured you'd want it back quicker than the rest."
Butch had begun fidgeting again. He was clearly as uncomfortable being here I was with him being here.
I reached up and took the book from him. He had a point though. When I flew home, it wasn't until I was home I realized I had left everything behind. More importantly my sketchbook.
I always kept it with me. It had everything in it.
And it was everything to me. It was all I had.
"Thank you." I whisper. I was a lot more calmer now, and was relaxing especially with my book back in my hands.
"Yeah, no problem." He replied.
We were both quiet no and this only seem to provoke Butch's energy even more.
"So –" I began but Butch cut me off.
"What happen? I mean why'd you fly off?" he asked, his fingers tapping his forearm excitedly, though his expression was blank.
My actions from earlier replayed in my head and I felt my face flush. 'OH MY GOD! He must think I'm… I'm …I'm a lunatic!'
"I-I um-I was just-" I stammered, unsure how to explained. Because I couldn't. I just couldn't…. not to him or anyone else.
I shook my head sadly, "I'm sorry. I was just feeling a little sick. That's all."
Butch at me and nodded slowly at my answer "Hm." His eyes traveled to his wrist suddenly " Shit. I got to go."
He walked away from my and I unconsciously let out a large breath. "Oh. Um… thanks again." I said.
Butch stopped at the window for a second and looked at my hands which still held my sketchbook. "You know, their really good. You should let more people see them."
And he flew off, this time leaving me completely confused.
Because for a second. Only for a second… I felt a little less alone.
Hatter: (CRYING HSYTERICALLY) I … I
Alice: Oh geez get a hold of yourself. This is embarrassing.
Hatter: I'm sorry (sobbing)… I'm just … overwhelmed…. Alice could you…
Alice: fill in for your ending captions? I couldn't – but if you insist - I will. So what my emotional co writer was saying- or sobbing, I hope you have enjoyed this chapter. Though I'm sad to say high school may conquered mines and my crybaby friend's schedules. So we are unsure if we'll continue weekly updates. But who knows we work miracles. So please stay tuned nonetheless!
Hatter: (still sobbing) Please review!... wait did you just call me your co writer?
