Chapter 2: The life they deserved

"What," she asked him as soon as they parked the bug in front of a motel and he turned off the ignition. "Is this the surprise? Sneaking into a motel room?"

"You're mean, you know that?" he said, with a frown, as he got off the car and rushed to her side. "Come on, let's go!"

"Let's go where?"

"Inside!"

"But…"

She tried to warn him that if he was planning to be sneaky, then he was doing quite the crap job by dragging her towards the reception. A couple of other guests had turned their heads to look at them, the porter by the door watched them with a raised eyebrow and to make matters worse, Neal had just tapped the bell by the counter to draw the attention of an old lady sitting by a desk in the office.

"Neal, what the hell are-"

"How can I help you?" the old woman asked, approaching the counter with a blank expression on her face.

"We have a reservation," Emma heard him say with a wide grin on his lips, "Name's Cassidy. Neal Cassidy."

She couldn't help but frown as the woman searched the computer screen. What kind of scam was that? He couldn't be serious… why would they pay to spend some time in a motel room when they could do it for free?

"Oh, yes, I see," the old lady said, narrowing her eyes as she looked at the screen. "One night, for you and your wife."

"Yes."

She saw Neal turn his head to look at her again, and his eyes had that mischievous look that she had grown to know so well.

"That will be fifty-nine dollars and eighty cents, tax included," the woman went on, as she gave him a form and a pen. "How are you going to pay for that?"

"Cash," he answered, biting his tongue as he wrote a few words on the paper and then signed it with a random scribble.

Emma couldn't help but smile at how proud he seemed to be of himself as he pocketed the receipt and the key after giving the woman the money.

"First question," she whispered, as soon as both of them took a left turn and headed to the room they had been assigned. "Where did that money come from?"

"Long story."

"Second: why are we spending it on a hotel room?"

He hurried ahead of her and unlocked the room door, holding it open for her to go in.

"Because," he replied, eyeing her with that smile that never failed to melt her, "it is your birthday."

She crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow before entering the room.

"We could have gotten a hotel room without paying for it."

"Yeah," he replied, wrinkling his forehead. "But we wouldn't have enjoyed it."

And he meant it. The reason he had got them a room for the rest of the day was because he wanted her, at least for once, to take a shower without worrying about getting caught, among other things. It was her day, and if all she wanted was to fool around in the king size bed behind him, then she would be able to. They would be able to take their time, to catch a glimpse of what life was like for other people who were on the right side of the law.

He smiled when she finally let her guard down and walked into the room, her eyes falling immediately upon the TV above the dresser.

"Look!" she exclaimed with a wide grin on her face. "We have a TV!"

"Of course we have a TV!" he replied, holding her waist as she flung her arms around his neck. "And look…" he reached for the brochure he was keeping in his back pocket. "You like this one, don't you?"

He unrolled the little magazine and flipped through it, pointing at to the title of a film he had underlined, showing her the channel and time they would be able to watch it.

"How did you…" she asked, looking from the brochure to his face with a frown.

"Ok… I confess I might have… borrowed the magazine when we were in that other motel."

"I mean the film," she said, punching him playfully on the shoulder. "How did you know?"

"What?"

"How did you know I like that film?"

"You told me."

"Like, ages ago."

She had told him, once. And if there was a thing she had learned never to do unless she was willing to get upset, it was to talk about certain movies with him. Or to watch them with him, for that matter. Especially if they were about dragons, pirates, fairytales: all he would do was complain that some people really had no idea what they were talking about. And then he would be cranky all day long, as if said moviemakers had meant nothing but to mock him with their 'lack of good sense'.

But, she had to admit: it made her warm inside that he actually paid that much attention to what she said.

He shrugged, emptying the contents of his bag on the bed before speaking.

"I have a good memory…"

More often than not, though, he wished he didn't: there were things in his life he would really like to forget.

"Well," she replied, taking off her boots and her jacket before jumping onto the bed. "I'm impressed."

"Aren't you forgetting something?" he asked, waving the remote control in front of her eyes.

"Oh no you wouldn't!" Emma had raised her eyes to him after breaking a packet of M&Ms open.

"What?" he asked, as he sat at the edge of the bed. "Keep the remote all to myself?"

"It's my birthday," she whimpered.

"So what?" he snorted, dodging her fist when she tried to punch him in the shoulder. "You already have the M&Ms."

"We can share the M&Ms."

"We can share the remote."

She raised an eyebrow, her shoulders drooping in defeat as he snickered at her.

"You don't even like M&Ms!" she exclaimed.

"Says who?"

"You!"

"I never said that…" he replied, trying not to laugh. "I only said it is not my first choice when it comes to chocolate."

"Oooh, I'm sorry, Mr. Apollo Chocolate Bars."

He handed her the remote with a triumphant grin when she shoved the packet into his hands and crawled over the bed to sit by his side.

"I think I'm going to take a shower," she said as she zapped through the channels.

"Does that mean I get the chocolate and the remote?"

"For some ten minutes, yes."

He smiled again when she stood up and kissed him on the lips before heading to the bathroom. A contented sigh escaped his mouth when he reached for a pillow and placed it behind his neck, lying back with his hands behind his head. So that was what life could be like. Stretching on a bed, watching TV, eating candy while waiting for his girl to join him… then make love to her and-

He sat up with a frown. He thought he had covered all the details for that day, but apparently he had missed out on something incredibly important. He scratched his neck and winced as he got to his feet and picked up his bag, knowing beforehand he was not going to find what he was looking for. He looked at the items he had swiped at the local convenience store, then looked around some more and spotted Emma's bag on a chair. He could save them both some time and search her things as well, but for some reason he could never bring himself to touch her belongings without asking for her permission first.

He walked towards the bathroom, and knocked on the door.

"Yeah?"

"Emma," he leaned against the doorframe, touching it with his forehead as he spoke. "Do you still have any condoms with you?"

"Hmmm," he heard her answer. "Not really. I guess we used the last one yesterday."

He scrunched up his face, clearly annoyed for having to go out to get them some. He wanted to enjoy every single minute of their day in that hotel room – only God knew when he and Emma would get to enjoy such luxuries again.

"Ok, I'm going out to-"

Before he could finish his sentence, Emma had opened the door, her legs and arms still dripping with water as she wrapped a towel around her body. His tongue unconsciously sneaked out to moisten his lips as his eyes dipped into her cleavage, his thoughts from moments before long forgotten.

"You were saying?" she asked, before lowering her head to wrap another towel around her head.

"I was?" he whispered, taking a step forward.

"You were," she purred, as she pressed the palms of her hands against his chest. "Something about condoms."

"Oh yeah…" he replied, fighting the urge to undo her towel and take her to bed. "I… I have to go out… to get us condoms…"

"Don't…"

They had always done it right. He was always so careful, so gentle, so worried about her… and she was grateful for that. But that day, that day only, maybe they could try something different.

"Emma…"

"Just pull out…"

"I don't know…"

"Please."

She saw him swallow as one of her hands slid down to the fly of his khaki pants, while the other undid the towel wrapped around her head, allowing her damp blond hair to fall over her naked shoulders. And then, defeated by desire, he grabbed a handful of her hair and brought her lips to his, his tongue covering hers with the sweet taste of chocolate. She gasped into his mouth when his hand grabbed her fingers and forced them to squeeze his cock, feeling it grow harder as they deepened the kiss.

"Gimme five minutes," he whispered, before disappearing behind the bathroom door.

Five minutes.

She felt her stomach flutter. It was not as if she didn't know what was going to happen, but this time… This time she had a surprise for him, and if she knew Neal Cassidy the way she did, he was either going to be speechless and very, very happy about it, or he would make jokes about it until the last day of their lives, and laugh at her until he was blue in the face.

She reached for her bag and searched for the little gifts she had gotten herself from the clothing store earlier that day, and when her eyes fell over them again, she winced. What the hell had she been thinking? Those things were so… girly.

But time was ticking, so she got rid of her towel and wore the purple see-through nightie before she changed her mind. A glance at the mirror showed her it didn't look as bad in her as she thought it would , but when it was time for the g-string… she wondered if it wouldn't be far too much embarrassment for a single day.

"My God, these things are uncomfortable" she whimpered, shifting her feet. "How do people even-"

It took her no more than two seconds to take the thing off and opt to go back to her traditional bikini underwear, but by the time she located it over the bed, she realized Neal was already standing by the door, staring at her with his mouth half-open.

She swallowed, feeling a tingle between her legs when his hungry eyes pierced hers, knowing that her garment left very little to imagination, especially now that she had removed the only piece of clothing under it... She knew what was on his mind; she could tell by the way the towel wrapped around his waist seemed to be tenting...

"You like it?" she asked, her voice slightly shaky as he walked towards her.

The truth was that they hardly ever had time to do what they were doing: letting their eyes slowly take each other in. It was not the first time she was seeing him half-naked after a shower, but it was the first time she actually let her eyes kiss his damp chest, his shoulders, his collarbone... She bit back a moan when the throbbing between her legs intensified, her nipples jumping to attention as his eyes did the same to her body, silently ravishing her as he bit his lower lip.

He knew he was staring, and how could he not? She was stunning. As his eyes danced around her body, as he saw that little smile on her lips as he got closer to her… And the way she was staring back, breathing deeply as if trying to steady herself, turned him on even more: Emma Swan was so much more than he could have ever hoped for, and he honestly did not know how, for the first time in his life, fate had been that generous to him.

"I'll take that as a yes..." he heard her whisper, grinning widely as she undid the towel around his waist, letting it fall to the floor to reveal his erection.

He glanced down at himself, smiling as well. One of the things he regretted the most about their Bonnie and Clyde lifestyle was that they had to do everything in a hurry, including sex. 20 minutes before housekeeping, as fast as they could before someone spotted them getting way too cozy behind a tree in one of the city parks...

And then, when they were in the bug, there was the problem of space. While all she had to do was bend her head to make him see starts with one of her steaming hot blowjobs, there was no angle in the universe that would allow him to return the favor, unless he was acrobatic enough to join the Cirque du Soleil.

Which, unfortunately, was not the case. He had not been blessed with any artistic skills, and that included dancing and contortionism. But now that they had a bed and time... he would make it last. He would wait for her, they would get there together.

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, his cock twitching in anticipation when he felt her warm breath on his neck and her fingertips brush against his hips. He wanted to reach between her legs to touch her, he wanted to know if she was as wet and hot for him as he thought she was...

But instead, he slid his hands down her back and pressed soft kisses over her shoulder, going up until his lips were on her ear, teasing her with the tip of his tongue.

When she clutched his arms and moaned against his neck, he lifted her in his arms and wrapped her legs around his waist, her wetness rubbing against his throbbing flesh and making him moan in return. It took him all the self-control he had not to guide himself into her now that their groins were connected, his cock leaking and adding to the lubrication at her entrance...

She was breathing heavily onto his skin, and he had to lower her onto the bed before he could no longer hold back the urge to penetrate her.

After he had lodged himself between her legs, he returned his attention to her neck, kissing his way up to her mouth, his tongue sneaking out to lick her lips and explore her mouth when she parted them.

"Neal..."

The sound of his name leaving her lips as she closed her eyes always gave him shivers, and he almost lost himself.

"Emma?"

"What?" she asked.

He waited until she opened her eyes to speak again, his hand finally descending onto her body to touch her sex.

"I want to go down on you."

She gasped, probably because his fingers were sliding up and down her dripping wet slit as he stared into her eyes, waiting for a response.

"You do?"

"Yeah..." he whispered, his mouth watering as he rubbed her folds and imagined that very soon it would be his tongue down there, savoring her. "For a long time now."

"Don't you find it... disgusting?"

He froze for a moment, not sure if he had heard it right.

"What?" he asked, not sure if he should laugh or frown, or both. "You're kidding, right?"

Her eyes darted around his face in a panic, and when she closed her legs slightly to push his hand away, he realized she was serious.

"Find it disgusting, find you disgusting?"

"You wouldn't be the first."

Her eyes were so gloomy when she spoke, so bleak, that any remnants of a smile he may have had on his face disappeared, and he felt his heart sink.

And then, it was all gone. She was smiling again.

"Tell you what..." she whispered, reaching between his legs to grab his cock. "Why don't I suck you instead?"

"Emma, stop…" he muttered, holding her hand and gently pushing it away from him. He would sure enjoy her mouth on him, he always did. But not like that. Not in that moment, when she was clearly hurting, when he wanted her to feel better, not the other way around.

"Why?"

"Because..." he blinked, studying her face, "you don't have to pretend it's fine, Emma. That you're fine."

"What are you talking about?" she snorted.

Instead of replying, he touched her face, and kept looking into her eyes, just to feel her hands push him away unceremoniously.

"Don't you dare pity me," she snarled, glaring at him before rising to her feet.

"Emma, I'm... I'm not..."

"I don't need to take this shit from you."

"What?"

Now that had escalated quickly. He was not sure as to what button he had pushed, but it certainly had been a bad, bad one.

"I'm leaving," she replied, wearing her jacket as she looked for her boots.

"Why?"

And then, she stopped moving around, standing still in front of the door.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry if I gave you the impression that I pity you, I don't," he said, hurrying to her side as he stumbled out of bed, wrapping his towel around his waist again so that his still very hard cock didn't jump to attention during a conversation that would certainly not be fun. "You're amazing. I just... I just don't understand how you can believe that you're not."

When she turned around to look at him again, tears were rolling down her face.

"I could give you a thousand reasons as to why I think I'm not that amazing…" she whispered, looking at the ground.

She wished he had been her first. That until then, she had never touched, or never been touched by, any other men. But the memories flashing before her eyes reminded her that nothing could be farther from the truth, that she had done things that disgusted her. That she had let others do things to her… things she detested. And that sometimes she hadn't even let them do some things, but it hadn't stopped them from doing said things anyway. And the worst part was that she felt she had deserved them, hence not telling anyone, hence living with shame… And now there was this man that was clearly not like any other she had met, and all she had to give him were pieces of her… The leftovers of others.

"Emma, look at me..." she heard him say, and more tears fell from her eyes when she realized he was not mad at her, or mocking her for her breakdown. "Look at me."

His fingers propped her chin up, and she let out a sob when his hazel eyes fell upon hers, loving instead of judging, trying to calm her down even though he was obviously still burning with need.

"People will tell you who you are your whole life…" he said, as he wiped away her tears with his thumbs. "Trust me, I know."

He was pulling her closer to his chest, his mouth pressing kisses on top of her head as she stopped trying to hold back tears, and let them soak his shoulder.

"But you can't have any of their crap. You can't let them get you down," he whispered. "Whoever said you were disgusting, baby…"

She winced, partially because of the memory the word elicited, partially because she was ashamed she had let it all out on him, who was exactly the one that did not deserve any of that crap.

"Emma, open your eyes."

After taking a deep breath, she opened her eyes again, and gathered the nerve to look at him as he held her face in his hands.

"You're not. You're amazing. Don't believe anyone who tells you otherwise."

There was something in the smile he gave her that was more than comforting. She let out a relieved sigh, feeling that at least part of her had healed a little with his words, even though a couple of stubborn tears insisted on falling from her eyes.

"Now let's go to bed," he whispered. "It's not every day we have one!"

He headed to the bathroom as she pulled back the covers and sat on the bed after taking off her jacket.

"Here," she heard him say as he handed her a roll of toilet paper.

She couldn't help but snicker.

"I think I ruined your plans for the afternoon," she whispered, before blowing her nose. "I'm sorry..."

"Well it's your birthday..." he replied, as he joined her on the bed and pulled the blanket to cover their bodies. "You can spend it the way you want. Even... crying."

She let out a chuckle, sniffing before she turned her head to look at him with her now very puffy eyes.

"I can cry too," he went on, giving her the packet of M&Ms, or what was left of it, "…especially if they are showing Peter Pan on Disney Channel..."

"Why do you hate that story so much?"

"Oh..." for one second, she thought she saw his eyes grow dark, but maybe it was just her imagination. "I'm a strange man."

"A very strange man," she said with a smile, studying his face as he fluffed up a pillow before putting it behind his back.

"Now, look," he whispered, bringing her body closer to his. "Your film has begun."

"I can't hear a thing," she complained, lifting her head from his chest to look for the remote control. "Where is it?"

"What?"

"The remote."

"I gave it to you."

"You didn't."

He snickered, biting his lip as he shifted his legs and glanced down at his lap.

"You have to be kidding me," she said, raising an eyebrow as she followed his eyes and saw something pointing up between his legs.

"What?"

"You're so funny, aren't you? Hiding the remote between your-"

When she reached under the covers to grab it, though, he couldn't help but whistle.

"I don't really think you'll be able to change channels with that," he muttered, trying to stifle a chuckle as she withdrew her hand from his erection.

"Neal!"

"But we can try," he chuckled, winking at her. "Come on, do it again."

He led her hand under the covers again, until her fingers grazed the sensitive skin under the tip of his cock. At the same time, from behind her head, he pressed a button at the remote control.

"There!" he exclaimed, making her turn her head to look at the TV. "It works! It does change channels!"

He kept sliding her hand up and down his cock, changing the channels in sync with every move.

"Witchcraft!" he whispered, biting back the urge to laugh at her puzzled face as she looked from the TV to his crotch.

"Ha ha, very funny!" she muttered, looking around to try and find out how the hell he was doing that.

"My God, Emma, what is wrong with you?" he finally burst into laughter. "You believed it!"

"No I didn't!"

"You did! You believed my penis could change TV channels!"

"Don't be stupid, I was just... confused."

By now, he was laughing so hard that tears were forming on the corners of his eyes. She couldn't help but chuckle as well, although she would never admit she had fallen for that.

"Confused because I knew you were changing the channels, but of course I knew it was not your penis!"

"For a moment you thought it was," he whispered, wiping away happy tears.

"No, I did not," she said, rolling her eyes.

"Ok, ok," he was still laughing, knowing there would be no point arguing. "Now stop playing with it or it will never... go back to normal."

He felt her grip on his shaft grow tighter as her other hand searched for his, and then led it to the wet spot between her legs, until his fingers were grazing the soft, hot skin of her sex.

"What if I don't want it to go back to normal?" she purred.

He gasped when one of his fingers probed her slick entrance, just to feel it throb gently around his digit.

"Do you still want to…"

"Yeah."

He didn't even wait until she finished her question. The answer would be yes, anyway; nothing had changed. If anything, the wait had aroused him even more, to the point of his erection twitch time and again against his belly, as if urging him into action.

His pulse had quickened, and he searched her eyes for the confirmation she really wanted it, that she was not just doing it for him. When she grinned at him, lifting her hips off the bed so that he could take her nightie off, he saw her eyes flash with lust, and that was all the confirmation he needed to settle between her thighs.

"But it's the first time I do this, so you'll have to give me some direction," he whispered, smiling as his eyes glowed with excitement. "Something like, 'Remember the Alamo' if I'm doing it right and… I don't know…" he chuckled, "'Black Hawk Down' if I'm not."

She barely had time to respond before his mouth started his journey over her body. He kissed her forehead, and then her lips and her neck, pressing soft kisses all over her skin until his mouth made contact with her collarbone and then with the side of her breasts. He could hear her heart beating faster as he made his way south, gently licking her nipples before moving on to her stomach… When his mouth was about to reach its destination, he placed his hands under her lower back and lifted her hips so that it tilted upwards, granting him better access to her glistening sex.

"Oh my God, Emma…" he whispered, as his eyes devoured the contour of her folds, which were slightly parted to show her swollen inner lips. He had never seen her like that before, and the visual confirmation of her arousal, the perfection of her sex made his cock throb even harder. "You're so beautiful…"

She bit her lip as he spent a long minute looking at her, the hunger in his eyes sending shivers down her spine and making her even wetter. When she felt him lick the inside of her thigh, a little below the spot where it connected with her torso, she gasped: she had never felt like that before, as if her insides were burning and melting, every single nerve in her body awakened and screaming in pleasure.

And then, his soft wet tongue was gliding up and down her slit, and she forced herself to keep her eyes open so that she could see him as he parted her sex with his fingers, and started licking her inner lips with harder strokes.

"That good?" he whispered, as his fingers gently touched the nub sneaking out from her folds.

"Y-Yes…" she stuttered, feeling her breath catch in her throat as his fingers seemed to unleash an even more powerful wave of pleasure into her bloodstream. "Yeah…"

She arched her back when the tip of his tongue tickled her entrance, her muscles clenching violently as more and more pleasure kept building up. All her body seemed to be throbbing, and when she felt him take her clit into his mouth, sucking it softly at first, and then harder, and faster, she let out a very loud moan, her hands closing into fists as her eyes fluttered closed.

"Here?" she heard him ask.

"Yeah," she panted. "Yeah, yeeah... There. Yes."

He understood the message, and kept doing exactly what he was doing, something for which she was incredibly grateful. She could barely breathe, her heart pounded faster than ever, and her whole sex throbbed and tickled and quivered...

"Neal… Neal… Oh my God… Oh"

She lunged forward with her mouth gaping open as stars exploded behind her closed eyes. She had known pleasure with him before, but nothing like that, nothing like that urge to cry and scream and laugh all at the same time.

Still shaking, she forced her body down the bed to reach him, and kissed his mouth fiercely as he sat up so that she could straddle him.

Her body was sweaty and hot, and he lowered his head onto her shoulder when her fingers wrapped around his cock and guided it into her. His eyes were closed as he focused on his breathing, trying to slow down his racing heart; she was so warm, so smooth, that he had to struggle not to let himself fall over the edge. He wanted it to last, he wanted to be inside her for as long as he could.

He kept his arms wrapped around her waist, one of his hands going up to hold the back of her neck as she slowly started moving up and down, sending shivers down his spine every time her muscles clenched around his shaft. He stilled himself for a moment, trying to delay the inevitable, but when her walls contracted again, pulling him further inside, the urge to come was far too intense for him to hold back.

"Emma… Oh God…"

She was breathing heavily into his ear when his whole body was swept by a huge wave of ecstasy. For a moment, his mind was so overwhelmed dealing with the sensations he was experiencing that the room around them disappeared, his only connection with the world outside being her body, her warmth, her moans.

His eyes were still shut when he felt something warm trickling down his crotch, and his heart skipped a beat.

It couldn't be. He couldn't have.

When he gathered the courage to open his eyes and look down at himself, all blood drained from his face.

He had.

"E-Emma... I..."

She knew what he was going to say. She could feel it. She knew she should be as worried as he was, and she probably would be when she regained her ability to think. But at that moment, maybe because she was still coming down from her daze, she felt like keeping him inside her and never letting him go.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"It's ok. It's fine," she muttered, noticing his panic as he shifted his hips under her. "I'm not on my fertile days."

"You sure?"

She wasn't, obviously. She had no idea when her fertile days were, only to begin with, but he looked so terrified that she thought she should say something to calm him down. Maybe there was some kind of miracle pill she could take, after all.

"Yeah. But I'll stop by the pharmacy tomorrow, just in case, ok?"

His cock was still rigid when she slowly withdrew it from her, his cum dribbling down her inner thigh when she lifted her body from his lap and got off the bed.

His eyes followed her, still apologetic, but all concern was replaced by another wave of bliss when he felt her tongue gliding over his stomach, and then his inner thighs to lick away the remnants of his semen, pressing soft kisses along his hot skin, wrapping her lips around his shrinking erection to clean him up.

He smiled when she moved up to kiss his chest, his fingers entwined with her hair.

"Be right back," she whispered, after pressing a quick kiss to his lips and walking to the bathroom.

He let his body fall onto the mattress while his mind tried to get back on track amidst a strange combination of satisfaction, happiness and worry. Her taste lingered in his mouth, her sweat stuck to his skin, and now... now she had something of his inside her as well, a primal part of him rejoicing for marking her as his with his seed, while a more rational one feared the consequences. Of course he wanted her to have his children, but not now, not under those circumstances.

He wanted to be able to provide for his family when the two of them were finally blessed with a baby... Then, then he would be the happiest man on earth for being the father of her kids.

"What are you thinking of?" she asked, lying next to him on the bed with her nightie back on.

"Nothing," he replied, getting under the covers and pulling her closer to his chest. "Nothing."