Raven stared at him blankly, not moving. She was still for so long that the Beast, in Beast Boy's voice, asked "-Raven?"
She slowly lowered her hands.
It's a trap, whimpered Timid.
No, said Wisdom. The Beast is cunning but he is not clever. If he wanted to destroy us he would attack, not try subterfuge.
Everybody shut up. "What were you doing chasing me?"
It was odd and unsettling to hear Beast Boy's nervous laugh coming from the Beast. Beast Boy's face was expressive, always shifting to reflect what he was thinking or saying. The Beast's face was like a mask, showing only anger, hardly changing as Beast Boy spoke. "What were you doing running? – I know, I know. I'm sorry. Raven, I need your help."
Raven waited.
"I mean, I'm not sure you can help me, I might be dreaming. This is a dream, right?"
"Maybe," Raven said cautiously, still waiting.
"This has something to do with the screaming. I'm not sure. I feel asleep and I was here and I was stuck looking like this. I think – I think you can change me back."
Raven had morphed Beast Boy before, but the magic that she learned to do it was black magic, and she wasn't eager to use it again. "It wouldn't be right to -"
"I don't want you to morph me. I want you to help me remember."
"Remember? You have amnesia?"
"No, of course not," Beast Boy said impatiently. Raven watched, disbelieving, as the Beast began pacing up and down the corridor where he had been chasing her only a few minutes before. "Raven, I never told anybody this before – but this is my favorite form. Of all my forms."
"Of all your -" light dawned. "You mean, even more than your human form?"
The Beast ducked his head, a little embarrassed, looking more animated as Beast Boy became more comfortable. "Yeah. Look at me, Raven! I'm strong! I don't have to change into an elephant or an ape or a rhino to win a fight – I can stay me! I feel more like I belong with the Titans – I'm not stupid weak little Beast Boy. I'm powerful! I'm -"
"You're reckless," Raven said flatly. "You're unable to control yourself. You're not a good part of the team and you don't think."
The Beast wheeled around, towering over Raven, and for a moment she was afraid. But it merely sighed. "You're right. I feel invincible but I know it's not true. And I can't go around like this forever – it's hard enough living a normal life when you're green. It's just that the feeling when I'm the Beast is so strong, I can't remember what it feels like to be Beast Boy. I can't get the shape. I'm stuck."
"You don't need me for this," Raven said. "You can do it yourself. I told you how this morning."
"You did?"
"Where do you go to come back to yourself?"
"The rocks – the rocks by the water!" The Beast turned to lumber down the corridor but Raven grabbed his arm. "This is faster." A moment later they had teleported to the narrow rocky strip between the grassy field of the Tower and the choppy blue-green waters of Jump City Bay.
"Sit down," Raven said, "and close your eyes." The Beast did so. "Now, remember all the things that make you, Beast Boy, different from the Beast. You're smart, you work well with the team, you can shape shift –"
" – I'm small," The Beast said gloomily, "I can't fight in my human form, I make stupid jokes, you don't like me -"
"You can think quickly, you're brave -"
"Nobody takes me seriously, you yell at me a lot –"
"- you have a strong heart. The Beast has a lot of anger. Sometimes it can be useful, there's a time for it, but it's not your whole life." Raven shivered as Rage disagreed with a maelstrom of curses. "You can't let it control you. It'll poison everything."
"So I have to go back to being small and weak -"
"No, you have to go back to being you. And you can change. But you have to start in the right place. Say your mantra."
The Beast breathed out and began chanting. Raven said, her low voice weaving in between his words, "Remember you're on the Titans. You. Not the Beast. Remember fighting with us. Remember the good you've done."
Raven wasn't sure what she was expecting. A flash of light? A dramatic transformation? It was more anticlimactic than that; as the chant continued, the Beast shrunk, getting smaller and skinnier until Beast Boy sat there, still chanting.
Raven touched his arm. "You did it."
Beast Boy opened his eyes and stretched out his arms, looking at them with disdain. "Yeah. Great."
Raven sat down beside him. "Just because you're not big and scary doesn't mean you're not powerful. And this doesn't mean that you can't use that form some day. But – what you learn on the way to taking that form is what makes you able to control it. Maybe it is what you are meant to be. I don't know. You'll have to keep working on it."
"And in the meantime I get to be Beast Boy. Good for a laugh and that's about it."
"Nobody's asking you to make jokes," Raven pointed out. "Especially not me."
"I don't know what else to do," Beast Boy said. "It's what everybody expects."
"Feel free to disappoint me," Raven said dryly. "Try doing something else."
Beast Boy glanced at her sideways and, abruptly, everything changed. The air thickened. Raven was suddenly overwhelmingly aware that it was just the two of them and they were alone.
Beast Boy leaned toward her until they were less than a foot apart and whispered, "You don't want me to do that."
"No," Raven managed, "I don't." But she didn't move.
"But I will anyway," Beast Boy continued, speaking sadly and softly, "Because this is a dream, and this will never happen in real life, no matter what I want. But since it is a dream, I get to say what you won't let me say. I love you."
Raven could barely breathe. She sat, frozen.
Beast Boy watched her, a half-smile on his face. "Since forever. Even though there's nothing I can be for you." He shook his head and his voice dropped, full of bitterness. "There's nothing skinny little funny joke Beast Boy can do to make things better for you. All I can do is love you. So I do, since forever." He leaned a little closer. "I'd tell you a thousand times, but I'm afraid I'd wake up. And I don't want to waste this dream."
Beast Boy moved closer still, his weight on one arm. He was reaching out, his hand on her shoulder, moving to touch her face, and he was near enough that all she could see were his green eyes, gentle and reflecting everything he'd just told her. She barely felt his lips brush her cheek, and then he was kissing her mouth, and Raven -
and Raven jerked awake.
