My head swam. Desperately, I grasped for my thoughts. Finally, I came to my senses, reaching my arms up and pushing Christian away. "What the hell?," I yell at him.
"I'm sorry," he whispered. "Why the hell did you do that?," I ask. Christian shrugged. "I don't know. It seemed like the right thing to do... you know, like something in a movie."
"Yah, well that would be nice if we were living in a God damned fairy tail- but were not! I was forced to marry you and live here! I would much rather be at home with my mother. Not stuck here in this freaking city of a house. So you can take your kisses and shove 'em right up your butt hole." Once I finished my rant I took a second to breath. Christian blue eyes hardened.
"I was just trying to be nice. You don't have to be a bitch to me, Rose." With that he walked away.
"Christian, wait!" I called after him, but it was hopeless. He didn't turn around or even stop for a second before going back into the house, slamming the balcony door behind him.
Why did I even say any of those mean things? That was horrible. He was just trying to be nice. Well he deserved it, called another part of my mind. He kissed me and I liked it- so maybe I should have slapped him. He had no right to do that. Wait...what?
Did I really just admit to liking his kiss? No. Thats impossible. I mean... it's Christian, my best friends ex-boyfriend- And my husband, another part of me called- I can't possible have... feelings... for him. Can I?
Just then my head began to throb, so I left my beautiful vista and my thoughts behind for the security of my warm bed.
'I need help. Mental help,' I thought to myself. Clearly I'm way too fucked up in the head to sort things out by myself.
As I stared up at the ceiling from the comfort of my warm, comfortable bed, I heard a creak in the room adjacent to mine, followed by a laugh.
Confused, I got up and walked to the door that separated Christian's room from my own. A loud moan sounded as I pressed my ear to the wood.
'No way. He is NOT having sex...,' I told myself. I was proven wrong by a girl's giggle. I clenched my jaw and stood up straight.
I grabbed the handle and pulled, opening one of the double-doors. "Don't mind me," I called, as I strode across the room. "Just heading off to the kitchen to get something to drink. Continue what you doing."
The girl gasped and Christian growled, but I refused to knowledge either.
"You could knock first," he called after me. Ignoring him, I finally reached to door leading to the hallway and left.
"Asshole," I muttered, to the closed door behind me.
"Who was that?," I heard the girl ask. "Oh, just my wife," Christian replied. I chuckled as I went down the stairs.
When I got into the kitchen I grabbed a glass from the sink and chugged it, then refilled it and sat down at the table, sipping from the glass.
Soon I heard footsteps down the stairs and the girl stood in the kitchen down ways, cloths wrinkled and clearly put on in a rush. Her blond hair was in dissaray. "I'm so sorry. I had no idea. Christian never mentioned you... I would have never...if I had known... I'm sorry." Her green eyes sparkled with tears.
"Don't sweat it," I said. "Were not even really married. It was all some-"
"Quick Vegas thing. Nothing serious. But the divorce is taking a while. We were really drunk," Interrupted Christian, as he appeared, seemingly out of thin air.
"Oh... really?," The girl looked at me questioningly.
"Um... yeah. Totally. Just some drunken hook up. Too bad he got me pregnant..."
"What?," They both yell in unison.
"Yup. Guess I should carry around a baby on board sign when I go places. Maybe tattoo 'I'm a father' on Chrissy's head."
"And you knew about this?," She turned to Christian, eyes full of disgust.
"What? No-," He stuttered out. "I had no-"
"Don't lie, Christian... you knew- thats why the divorce is taking so long."
"You sicken me!," Said the girl to Christian. "Never call me again. Not even after your... divorce." Then she turned to me. "Your such a strong woman. You deserve way better than this asshole. Stay strong!" With that she sent a glare over at Christian and walked out.
"Wait!," Christian called, only to be answered by the slam of the oak doors. He turned to me. "Your...pregnant? He got you pregnant?" I shook my head and smiled. He glared at me. "Your a sick bitch. You know that right?"
"Hey," I responded. "I'm not the one who had sex with some chick while my pregnant wife was in the other room."
Christian narrowed his eyes. "No. Your just the one who slept with the maid while I was out the first day after we got married."
My mouth hung down. I thought he had forgiven me for that. I could find no words to describe my shame and tell him how sorry I was. For once I, Rose Hathaway, was speechless.
"And then," he continued, "When I try and forget and tell myself, 'Hey! She is, after all, my wife, and even though she broke our pretend vows and cheated on me, I can't do the same.' I mean- I'm a guy, I need pleasure. Even if it's just a kiss. I can't go ten years without any sort of physical attention from a woman. So I decide, 'Well, maybe we can have something. Maybe not love- but something to keep us both satisfied and I kiss you- you push me away and criticize me as though I did something wrong. Me! Then I go out and get the thing I've been craving for months, and you somehow make an ass out of me, when I tried to work something out between us to where I didn't have to break my vows. Even fake they are still supposed to mean something!"
Finally he closed his mouth and stopped talking. I felt as though a pile of bricks fell onto me, knocking the air out of me. I fell from my chair, tears streaming. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "I didn't realize."
"Obviously," he quipped. For a moment I struggled, trying to regain my composure. When that was achieved I sat back up in my chair. Christian took the seat across from me. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."
I shook my head. "You were right. I'm a bitch. My feelings deserved to be hurt. Hell, maybe they should have been crushed, for the way I've treated you. I never considered you point of view. Can you forgive me?"
Christian nodded. "Yes- but we need to work something out. I can't go ten years without anything. I need your permission to, you know, sleep with other people."
My heart sunk at his words. Am I not good enough for him? Wait- What? Not good enough for him? I don't even like him! Not like... that.
"No...," The word flew out of my mouth before I had time to stop it. Christian's eyes widened in surprise. "W-wha-what?," he stuttered. "Are you serious?"
I rose from my chair and walked over to him and kissed him. I'd officially gone crazy.
