Author's Notes: Hello all! Thanks for tuning in! I hope you like this angst filled chapter, I spent a lot of time re-working it as I couldn't seem to get things quite right. So here it is! Also I'd like to give a shout out to the Story "The Dalton Girl" by starshipranger99, I've been enjoying it so much, so I want to pass the word along and get them more readers because they're awesome! Also thanks to all those who are following the story. And one last request, anyone care to review? I just want to know if you think my reasons for Blaine cheating, Rina's secrets and Mr. Anderson's revelations are all meeting your expectations. Thanks and happy reading!
Rina turned the key to the Anderson family home unsure of what to expect behind the door. She wasn't sure if Mr. Anderson would be waiting for her, or if Blaine would be. She opened the door carefully, it was 11:00pm and she didn't want to disturb the family if anyone was sleeping. She quietly rolled her suitcase inside and shut the door behind her. The house was dark save for the dancing light of the fireplace in the adjacent living room. As she removed her shoes she heard creaking floor boards and turned around to see Blaine standing in front of her, looking sad and tired. As her gaze met his he said, "you're home, I'm so glad you're home" and he hugged her tightly. She was surprised that Blaine was so happy to see her, and even more surprised at him saying 'you're home'. But she didn't take long to analyze his words, she was too happy to see that he wanted her there, that he needed her. They stood in the entryway silently embracing each other for a long time. Finally Blaine pulled away and looked her straight in the eye and said, "I'm sorry."
Rina was surprised that Blaine was apologizing, if anyone had to make amends it was her. Then he spoke words that she thought would shatter her future. "I saw Connor while you were gone", he said to her. "And he told me the truth." Rina looked at him with fear in her eyes and it pained him to see her look at him with such an anxious glance. He gently took her hand and said, "I'm not mad, I'm grateful, and I'm sorry. If I had known all that you sacrificed to keep me safe I would have understood why you seemed so distant. Rina I had no idea that you had been the one to find us, that you had been hurt yourself, I just thought that when you said you didn't know anything you were telling the truth. But I'm your best friend, I should have known better. I should have known that you would have done everything to keep me safe."
Rina held her head low and said, "but that's the thing Blaine, I didn't." He looked at her with a puzzled expression and she said, "I guess it's time you heard the whole truth. Because not even Connor knew what really happened that night." They went up stairs to Blaine's room, and sat on his bed. Rina's hands began to shake, and her whole body began to shiver, Blaine held her hand and said, "whatever it is Rhi, just tell me. I want to know the truth." She looked at him and said, "I should have told you, I should have told the police. But I was afraid. I was too afraid to really help you, I was too much of a coward to do the things I should have. But I want to make it right." Blaine was confused, but he hoped as she continued he would begin to understand.
"I know who hurt you Blaine, I know who it is," she said quietly. He didn't believe her, he knew she wouldn't keep something that monumental from him. She was his best friend, she was loyal, she would never protect the guys who hurt him. "Why didn't you say anything then," he asked flatly.
"I wanted to Blaine, I wanted to put them away forever, but I wasn't strong. I didn't have courage, I wasn't tough enough to handle what happened that night." She knew the explanation wasn't enough, and although she didn't want to admit to Blaine that her virginity had been taken long ago, it was the only way he might understand why she didn't do the right thing. "When I got there, you and Connor were already gone; I didn't know what to do, or how to make them stop. I just attacked, not realizing there were three of them and only one of me. I just wanted them to stop hurting you, but they quickly overpowered me, and then he took off his mask."
Blaine wasn't sure he wanted her to continue, he could feel where she was going, he could sense the direction this was headed, and he didn't want to know that his friend might have suffered even more than he did.
"It was Zack, and his friends Dean and Logan. He said hateful things, things I can't repeat, and then he gave me a choice. I could give him what he wanted, or I could watch you die. I'm sorry Blaine, I tried . . . I did all I knew I could . . . I said no, but I couldn't watch you die, I wasn't going to let you die!"
She burst into a fit of tears and Blaine held on to her tightly, letting her cry into his shoulder, and it reminded him of the day she left Ohio, how she had been so strong, and Blaine realized that she had done more than he could have ever possibly imagined. She had truly loved him, even more than his parents did, and suddenly she was all that mattered, and he would never let her go.
"Good morning," Rina said softly. Blaine opened his eyes surprised that he didn't have a headache that morning, his curtains were drawn and he could see rain clouds outside. He was happy to look outside and see there was a world beyond this room, beyond the agony of a concussion and broken ribs. Rina had stayed by his side for three weeks, but today was her last day with him, she would be leaving at 7pm for Chicago, and the following week she would be living a life far different from the one Blaine was left behind to manage. He sat up to look at her and he said, "I thought you said I get a present today." She smiled widely and said, "yes, in fact, you get two." She pulled out a bag of his clothes and said, "for part one of a two part present you'll need to get dressed, because today, you're going home." Blaine couldn't help but let out a cry of joy. Although his mother had only seen him twice in the hospital and his father not at all, home was the only place he wanted to be, the only place he felt safe.
He quickly got dressed and soon his doctors were ready to discharge him. He still had weeks of recovery ahead of him but he would be comfortable at home, slowly working through the rest of what would be a lost year, a year he would put behind himself soon enough.
Blaine's mother picked him up and took him straight home, setting him up in a bedroom downstairs so that he wouldn't have to climb any stairs with his still weak legs. Once he was settled she left him and Rina alone, knowing that he would need her soon enough once he learned his friend would not be staying with him.
Blaine and Rina spent a lazy afternoon in the Anderson household, they watched their favorite movies and he napped next to her for one of them. Soon it was 5, and Rina had to tell him goodbye, she had to break her best friend's heart. She didn't bargain on breaking her own as well.
"I was afraid Blaine," she said; "I was afraid for you, for Connor." "I knew that if I told the police who they were, they might deny it, I was worried they wouldn't be convicted, that they'd go free, and they'd hurt you again. That's why I found you Dalton. Connor finished his year through homeschooling. He said he didn't want to attract any attention to you or himself. That's why he stayed away. So I knew I couldn't just leave you, I knew you would need a safe place; where you could be a free bird and spread your wings, where you could sing."
Rina gently woke Blaine up from his nap, he saw her smiling face but noticed it was sad, her eyes were not as bright as they had once been. "What's wrong Rhi?" he asked sleepily. "It's time for your second present," she said to him sweetly. He sat up straight as she pulled a rather large box from underneath his bed, it was wrapped in blue paper with a red ribbon. She placed it on his lap and said, "well, open it. Blaine eagerly opened the box, excited to see what would be inside as Rina watched with hopeful eyes, wanting him to like her plan, wishing that he would accept her offer.
He opened the box and inside sat a blue and red blazer, pocket embroidered with the Dalton Academy crest, a tie, and on the blazer a pin with a Warbler on it. He smiled and said to her, "what, is this a costume? Are we going to a party tonight?" She chuckled slightly, "no, you're still recovering remember. Don't you recognize the school crest?" He studied it more carefully, and finally his brain put the pieces together, "I'm going to Dalton?" He whispered it softly, as if he couldn't believe it, "Rhi, that school is impossible to get into, how did this happen? They've got an amazing zero tolerance bullying policy, we're going to be so happ. . ." he stopped in mid sentence. "Wait, that's an all boys school. We won't be together anymore." Rina sat on the edge of his bed and said, "no we won't. But I can't leave if you're not safe. Now you won't start until next year, they couldn't let you in since you have two more months of recovery before you can even leave the house. But you'll be part of the Warblers and you'll get to grow in your talents and you're going to have so much fun, and the boys are all so handsome you're bound to meet someone . . ." but before her enthusiasm could overflow Blaine stopped her dead in her tracks. He violently threw his gift across the room and yelled, "HOW COULD YOU?"
Rina jumped back stunned and said, "why are you doing this? What's wrong?" Blaine closed his hands into tight fists and looked her straight in the eye, "how can you leave me? You're all I have. My parents don't love me, my brother couldn't care less what happened to me, and Connor is gone. What am I going to do? You're supposed to be my best friend, how can you just leave me alone here? Don't you care about me?"
Blaine's words stabbed Rina to the bone. She knew she wanted to stay, but the pain was getting too intense, around every corner she feared she would meet her attackers. She had begun having panic attacks and nightmares, her sadness ever increasing from day to day. She had to leave before it consumed her, before she lost the little sanity she had left. "Blaine, I wish I could stay, but this is an amazing opportunity for me, to go to the Academy, to study what I love. You'll be safe at Dalton, you'll make new friends, and I'm always just a phone call and a plane ride away." Blaine looked away from her, tears forming behind eyes he clenched tight, "you're just like everyone else. You don't really love me." Rina began to cry, "don't say that, it's not true. I love you very much Blaine, you're my best friend. I will always be here for you." He could feel himself falling deeper and deeper into rage, but it wasn't just rage, it was sadness, and an abject sense of loneliness he had never before experienced. He couldn't bear to let her see him so weak anymore, he felt so helpless and it was driving him mad. "Get out" he said to her through gritted teeth.
"What?" she said back quietly in disbelief. "Just go, go to Chicago. Leave, I don't need you. Just go. GET OUT!" Rina began to cry, "Blaine don't do this to me, you're my best friend, I don't want to leave like this." Before long Blaine couldn't contain himself anymore, he fell into a final fit of tears. He vowed that he would never cry again, that these would be his last, and never again would he go back to this place. For the last time Rina climbed into bed beside him and let him cry into her arms. "I'm sorry Blaine, I'm so, so sorry." He realized that this was the first time he had seen her cry though their whole ordeal, and he determined to have the strength she has shown through his darkest hour.
Blaine had always known that Rina must have pulled more magic than he could ever comprehend getting his parents to let him go to Dalton, but he hadn't ever thought about just how much she had done to keep him safe and happy. "I knew it'd be the best place for you, I went to visit the school and I met Jeff, Wes and Trent. They were so nice, and I just knew you'd grow to feel at home there, that you would be free to be who you are." Suddenly Blaine realized Rina had truly been his best friend all along. He had always felt a strong and instant connection with the Warblers; it felt like home when he was with them. And it was home, because Rina had made it home for him long before he got there. Then he knew he would never doubt her again, he would never question where her affection lied or where her loyalty had gone. He knew in those moments that they had forged a bond stronger than friendship. She had gone above and beyond what friends do, she was family. And presumably, the only family he had. He looked her straight in the eye and said, "I don't care that you didn't tell the police, you kept me safe the best way you knew how, and I could never ask for anything more from you."
Rina smiled and felt relieved, she had never expected Blaine to react this way, she had always thought he would be so mad at her for not revealing the boys' identities that she would lose him forever. She never expected him to understand, it almost didn't seem possible. "You have to know the real reason I came back" she said to him. "I came back to put those boys away. Not for me, but for you. I should have stood up a long time ago Blaine, and I didn't. I tried to hide the pain by becoming someone you would have hated. If you knew all the things I have done I'm sure you wouldn't want to know me. But I'm done, I want to make things right, or at least try to." Blaine held her hand and said, "Rina, I will always be your friend. You have done more for me than I ever imagined. I'm sorry I haven't been a better friend to you. And I don't care about your past, you are more than your mistakes."
As he said those words he began to cry and Rina asked him "what's wrong?" Blaine looked up at her and said, "I just hope you won't judge me Rina. Because I've done something bad too; I've cheated on Kurt." As Blaine said those words he looked at Rina and realized that her expression didn't change, she looked at him with the same loving concern in her eyes. He knew he didn't deserve it, not after the way he treated her; but he was comforted to know that she would stand beside him despite what he had done. "I'm going to lose him" Blaine said. "I've ruined our relationship, and he's never going to love me again." Rina pulled him into a hug and said, "we can fix this Blaine, it won't be easy, but we will." Finally he said, "I'm so tired, I've been crying for two days straight." She smiled at him and said, "then get some rest, we'll figure this out tomorrow." Blaine got into bed and as Rina turned to leave he said to her, "Rina, remember when I was in the hospital, and you would . . . will you . . ." he felt ashamed for asking but she smiled sweetly at him and said, "I'll be right back."
Ten minutes later Rina came back to his room and got into Blaine's bed, snuggling up to her best friend. When he had awoken in the hospital he didn't feel safe, and only when Rina would sing him to sleep could he get a good night's rest. Rina had selfish reasons for caring for Blaine so well, she had always loved him as more than a friend, and even if he didn't feel the same she at least would know how it felt, to have him need her. But that night it didn't feel like that, that night Blaine felt more like a broken child that needed a mother, he needed warm and loving arms that had no agenda but to comfort him. And that's exactly what she did.
Blaine knew how Rina felt, he had always sensed she loved him, and when Connor confirmed it he knew that asking for this would be too much. But he couldn't help it, she was the only one who was willing to offer him comfort, to offer unconditional love, love that he needed and craved since he had come out to his parents. It was love that had been denied him for so long. Feeling a growing sense of regret he began to cry and Rina softly rubbed his back to calm him down. Then she began to sing, knowing it was the only thing she could do for him to help his aching heart.
Hold up
Hold on
Don't be scared
You'll never change what's been and gone
May your smile (may your smile)
Shine on (shine on)
Don't be scared (don't be scared)
Your destiny may keep you warm
Blaine held on to her hand, he was afraid of moving forward, he was afraid of his past, he was afraid that he was too weak to fix things with Kurt. But as he held her hand he felt strong, and he began to realize that she was stronger than he had ever realized, and that she in turn would make him strong too.
Cos all of the stars
Are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them some day
Take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Get up (get up)
Come on (come on)
Why're you scared? (I'm not scared)
You'll never change
What's been and gone
Cos all of the stars
Are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them some day
Take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Cos all of the stars
Are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them some day
Take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
We're all of us stars
We're fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see us some day
Just take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Stop crying your heart out
Stop crying your heart out
The next day Rina woke long before she should have, but sleep had come and gone and she couldn't stand to be in bed any longer. She quietly got up out of Blaine's bed and found a bathrobe, after brushing her teeth and washing her face she went downstairs to make herself some coffee. She went about making coffee thinking about how she would approach the police, how she would face the glee club, and how she would help Blaine fix his relationship with Kurt. Just as her head began to spin she was startled back into reality by Mr. Anderson.
"Rina" he said quietly. She looked at his face, she saw a man tired and struggling. She had only seen that expression on his face once before, on the night of Sadie Hawkins. Rina asked, "are you alright Mr. Anderson?" He looked as if he would cry and simply said, "can we talk in my study?" She obliged silently and followed him in, sitting down across the desk from him, which sent her back to the day she changed Blaine's life.
Rina had finally be released from observation, when Mr. Anderson asked her to come see him when she was ready. At first she thought he must have come to his senses. Maybe he would provide a reason for her to tell the truth, and the security she had longed to feel. After all Mr. Anderson was a lawyer, he could offer her protection, and a chance to put away the boys who had hurt his son. But when he shut the door and they were alone in the room, Rina realized that wasn't his intention at all. She wasn't in a place that was safe, she was in a place where she too would be stifled and silenced.
Mr. Anderson had only one agenda in mind, to silence the girl who knew the truth. He sat stoically for several minutes and finally said, "Miss Hendrix, I have asked you here today in the hopes that your friendship with my son will prove to be helpful to him in this time of need." Rina looked at him with disgust, if she had survived a beating and gang rape she wasn't going to back down to Mr. Anderson and his homophobia. She replied to him, "I just risked my life to save him Mr. Anderson, and if you haven't noticed, I've been the one staying with him in the hospital day and night by his bedside." She said this with bitterness, but surprisingly Mr. Anderson didn't seem bothered by this, he said, "it's good to see you still have a fighting spirit, you'll need that in the days ahead."
Rina couldn't understand Mr. Anderson or his words and she was tired of playing cat and mouse, but more importantly every minute she spent there was another minute away from him. Finally she said, "what do you want Mr. Anderson?"
He got up slowly and paced behind his desk, it would have been intimidating if Rina hadn't already faced her worst fears just two nights ago. He spoke slowly and said, "Miss Hendrix I realize you didn't tell the police all you know. I've defended many young women in your situation, and I know you did much more than you let on to keep my son alive. But if you want to keep him safe, you have to keep those secrets hidden. I'm hoping this will serve as a wake up call to my son. I am hoping he'll realize that this world will never accept what he has chosen to become. If he never knows the fear of this happening again will make him see the error of his ways." Rina had heard enough, she couldn't take any more. She stood up and yelled, "IWILL NEVER TAKE ORDERS FROM YOU! I WILL TELL EVERYONE I KNOW IF I HAVE TO, I AM NOT GOING TO BE A PART OF YOUR PLAN!" Mr. Anderson moved to strike her but she stood strong, and suddenly he realized that this young girl was much braver than he could ever be. He lowered his hand to his side and bowed his head, his shoulders slumped in defeat, he could only hope her sense of pity would make her see that she needed to help him.
"It's not easy you know," he said to her quietly, "to see your son lying lifeless, without any way to help him." Rina heard sincerity in his voice, something she hadn't ever heard before. She sat and said, "you really do love him don't you." He didn't answer but said, "when he was born, I thought I was going to lose him, and my wife. You see Blaine was a breach baby, and Beverly had to undergo an emergency c-section. Something went wrong, she lost a lot of blood, and Blaine wasn't breathing when he was born. I didn't know what to do, what if she died? What if he died? I was helpless, I couldn't do anything to save them. Do you know how that feels? I am supposed to be the strongest man he knows, and I began our relationship by failing him. I know you don't understand why I'm doing this, but it really is for his own good. Maybe when you're a parent you'll understand that."
Rina never wanted to understand, but she suddenly found herself in a unique position. Although she didn't want to make a deal with the devil, she realized this was the only opportunity she would have to help Blaine. So she swallowed the last bit of her pride and said, "alright Mr. Anderson, but I need something in return." He looked at her with fear in his eyes and said, "what?" She pulled a Dalton pamphlet from her pocket and put it in front of him. "This, in return for my silence."
Mr. Anderson knew he wanted to help Rina, and in turn his son. He wasn't sure how he was going to do this, or if he even could, all he knew was that he wanted to try. He sat and looked at her and said, "I'm sorry Rina. I'm sorry I made you lie, and I'm sorry I've hurt Blaine. I want to help you in any way I can, because I know you'll be helping my son."
Rina felt the strong urge to hug Mr. Anderson, and without giving it a second thought she did. At first he was stiff to her embrace, but soon he relaxed and gave in. He smiled and said, "I see why my son loves you so much. In some ways you're like his mother. But you're stronger than her, you're stronger than most people I know." Rina looked at Mr. Anderson and said, "how I can help? Tell me what to do?" Mr. Anderson looked her straight in the eye and said, "you can start by telling the truth, and all of it." He said this in a way that made realize that he meant telling Blaine that she had been silenced by his father.
"He doesn't need to know Mr. Anderson," she said softly. He shook his head and said, "if I am ever going to repair things with my son, I have to do it by telling him the truth, and hoping he'll find some way to forgive me." Rina looked out the window knowingly. It seemed as if the three of them were in for a lot of truth, but if Blaine could forgive her, she had hope he could forgive his father, and Kurt him.
