A/N: I'm back with a new collection of 50 oneshots. Hooray? 50 Starting Points is slightly different to my previous 50 collections. Instead of being supplied with 50 prompts, I've got 50 fic titles to use. Fun? I hope so.

Also, somewhat appropriately, 50 Starting Points marks my 150th individual story and/or collection on this site.

But enough waffling. Let's get on with the first one...

x tromana


Title: Gunning Down Romance
Author:
tromana
Rating:
T
Summary:
"I don't love Patrick Jane." Lisbon takes her deniability to extremes.
Characters/Pairings:
Jane/Lisbon
Notes:
No warnings, no spoilers. Just a silly little oneshot.

Gunning Down Romance

Cho

"I don't love Patrick Jane," she said firmly but Cho merely crossed his arms and looked back at her skeptically.

This conversation was bizarre to the extreme and not one she expected herself to be having with Kimball Cho of all people. Though they were friends - good friends even - and she implicitly trusted his opinion, Lisbon still found herself feeling incredibly uncomfortable. After all, talks about relationships and love were not something she generally shared with Cho. Their relationship, for the most part, remained strictly professional and that was what she liked about him.

Good old unflappable Cho, her second in command and reliable coworker. He knew exactly what to say and when. It was only in very rare circumstances that he ever let her down. And he always knew precisely which boundaries not to cross, and didn't dare to pressurize her into making decisions she didn't want to make.

However, that didn't mean he was perfect. He still made mistakes. And that was precisely what had led to this incredibly awkward situation they found themselves in.

He'd admitted he was worried about her. Specifically, he was worried about her relationship with Jane and where it could end up leading her. Things had simply escalated from there, and eventually he'd insinuated that their relationship was developing into something that it probably shouldn't have.

But he had nothing to worry about. Of course, like with the rest of the team, she was friends with Jane. That was it, nothing more, and nothing less. Naturally, even she could admit that she was marginally closer to Jane than the others. However, that was because she was naturally inclined to spend more time with him and he often forced himself to spend time with her, too. It was also due to her natural concern for him. The fact he was deeply embroiled in a quest for revenge meant she was equally conscious about her own quest to save him from himself.

There was nothing more to their relationship than that.

"I didn't say you did, boss," Cho said.

"You insinuated it."

Cho just stared her down and Lisbon sighed.

"We're friends, Cho. Nothing more, nothing less."

"You're closer to him than the rest of us."

"Because I spend more time with him," she explained, but she had a feeling the words were dying on deaf ears.

"Just be careful."

"You have nothing to worry about," she assured him before promptly changing the subject.

She'd had more than enough of this insanity to last a lifetime.

Van Pelt

Alcohol loosened the tongue, Lisbon knew that. Generally, it was why she avoided drinking with her co-workers. She always feared saying the wrong thing to them at the wrong time, and landing herself in all sorts of a mess. Of course, due to her prior experiences with alcohol in her family, she was generally careful with the stuff anyway. However, that was never enough to totally rid herself of the deep-rooted fear.

But she had invited Grace Van Pelt out for an ulterior motive. Recently, Van Pelt had been hiding herself away again. A recent case which had nearly cost them both their lives had left her traumatized. Although Van Pelt had been required to visit the CBI's resident psychiatrist – it was mandatory in any cases involving a shooting – Lisbon was still concerned. She suspected that the whole situation was reminding her O'Laughlin, a time that none of them would have liked to return to.

That was why she had invited her out.

Partially, it was to hopefully talk the situation out. Either that or it would serve as an ideal distraction. That was something that Lisbon felt like they both needed at this moment in time.

Unfortunately, it was only a matter of time before the conversation subjects grew a little out of hand.

It all started innocently enough. Lisbon herself had brought up the subjects of romance and love lives. She was aware that her junior agent was a beautiful young woman and she could easily have made anyone happy. However, since O'Laughlin, she hadn't even heard of her making a pass at another man, never mind anything more. Just because she had appeared well-adjusted (until this very recent episode) on the surface, it didn't mean she actually was.

Patrick Jane was a prime example of that.

Eventually, when Van Pelt had gotten bored of the questions, it was hardly a surprise that she turned the tables on her boss. Except, that was the last thing that Lisbon had actually expected, of course. She cursed the alcohol and promptly decided it was that was at fault.

"But boss," Van Pelt insisted, "if you believe there must be someone out there for me, the same must apply to you."

Lisbon snorted derisively. She had long since given up on the concept of deep and meaningful relationships. She was too much of a martyr to her work, for a start.

"Or…" she continued when Lisbon didn't answer. "You've already met him. He's not ready yet. Jane?"

"Now you're just being ridiculous, Grace. I don't love Patrick Jane."

Rigsby

"And before you get any further, no I don't love Patrick Jane," Lisbon seethed.

Rigsby stood in her office, looking gangly and awkward, just as he often did. If she'd been in a far better mood, then Lisbon would have been amused by the sight. Instead, she was simply frustrated. She had expected Rigsby to come into her office with news on one of their cases, not to bother her about something which was little more than gossip. And Teresa Lisbon really hated gossip, especially when she was the subject of it.

She knew that gossip wasn't something that could necessarily be avoided, though. Generally, she just chose not to partake in it and ignore it. It was far easier on her sanity that way. After all, she was here to do a job and if the others wanted to speak behind others' backs, then that was their choice. But this time, Rigsby had chosen to bring the gossip to her and she knew it couldn't be avoided.

"I didn't say, uh. What I mean is-" he stuttered.

"Rigsby," she said coolly.

"Yes, boss?"

"You're not helping yourself here."

"I know. It's just people are talking and I thought you needed to know. It's not fair on you."

There was no way of denying that Wayne Rigsby had a heart of gold. She had long since asserted that her team was her family and she could see that this was his way of sticking up for his family. He wanted her to know what was going on because it involved her. Unlike Jane himself who chose to keep her in the dark on such matters because 'deniability was her best friend'. However, this was something she would have much preferred to remain (comparatively) oblivious to. She knew that people talked about her relationship with Jane; she'd have been foolish to think otherwise. But the details about it, that was something she hadn't needed to know about.

"Have you told Jane any of this?" she asked, intrigued.

"He probably already knew," Rigsby admitted.

"Or if not, he probably started it himself."

"Well, neither of you help the situation."

"Wayne Rigsby, are you implying that I behave inappropriately with my consultant."

"I didn't mean it like that. It's just you're very close and you…"

He stopped again, and Lisbon was relieved. Despite her warnings about him digging himself into a hole, he had continued to do so.

"I'm his boss; it's my job to care," she replied coolly. "And even if I wasn't, I'm his friend. We all know how much he needs those."

"Yes, boss, sorry, boss," Rigsby replied meekly.

Herself

After an evening shower, to relax her aching muscles and soothe her addled mind, Lisbon found herself staring at her reflection in the mirror. Over the past couple of weeks, the team had been planting seeds in her head and she didn't like it much.

"I do not love Patrick Jane," she told herself firmly.

She shook her head and began to towel dry her hair. A few seconds later, she paused, looked herself in the mirror again, square in the eyes.

"I do not love Patrick Jane," she repeated.

Jane had always told her that she was hopeless at lying. She had always scoffed at the claims. There were still things that he didn't know about her. And she had lied to him on occasion, and he had believed them. Or at least, she had thought he had believed them. You could never be sure when it came to Patrick Jane.

"I don't."

She couldn't even convince herself that that was the honest truth.