I apologise but the "last chapter" is going to be in two parts. It was getting too long so I decided to split it.
The Little Red Tattoo
Chapter 12 – Part 1
Sam hit the door, rolled into the room looking for the Sabatino with Paris right behind him.
"Sam stop, it's me. Don't shoot." Deeks was kneeling over the body of Sabatino which still had the knife logged in his chest. Julia jumped when Sam blasted through the door and landed at her feet but she never let go of Kensi' hand.
"Damn Deeks, is everyone alright?"
"Yea, we're all good. Well except for Sabatino. No I was right the first time, we're all good."
Kensi was still slowly rolling her head back and forth and muttering under her breath still trapped within her dreams. Julia was trying to comfort her but to no avail.
Deeks released the agent from the handcuffs and pick-up the guns. As Sam stood up and surveyed the room, Paris had already gone to find a doctor for Kensi.
"What the hell happened in here Deeks?"
"Sam, I think Kensi is starting to wake up. I'll explain in a minute. Right now I want to know how she is."
Dr. Noslo ran into the room and moved immediately to Kensi' side. The doctor hadn't noticed the dead body on the floor yet as she was concentrating on her patient. Checking Kensi' vitals quickly the doctor could see that she was beginning to come out of the coma but all the drugs that been in her system were making this a very difficult task.
Dr. Noslo turned to speak to Deeks when she saw the body and the knife.
"Oh my God." She gasped and put her hand to her mouth. "Is he dead? Do I need to check him?"
"No, I'm sure he's dead. We need to wait for the police to secure the scene but we will cover him with a blanket." Sam explained as he moved to grab a blanket from the storage closet.
"How is she doing doctor? She started talking, moving and twitching. Then her eyes were fluttering like she was in a trance. Is she waking up now?" Deeks waited anxiously for the doctor to provide him with the answers he was looking for.
"She seems to be fighting to do just that. I believe the drugs mixed with her memory lost are having a serious effect on the brain and its ability to process information clearly."
"What does that mean? Please doctor, tell us what is happening to my little girl."
Julia was now worried. She saw the look on the doctor's face and she could read it very well. When Kensi began moving, she thought it was a good thing but now she wasn't so sure.
"I need to sedate her and keep her as calm as possible. I'm not going to put her back into a coma, but she needs to rest."
By this time three nurses had joined them in the room and began to ready Kensi to move her to another room.
"Doctor, the room at the other end of the hall is empty. We can move her there." One of the nurses spoke as she checked the monitors attached to Kensi.
"Good, lets move her now. I don't want her or any of us in here any longer than necessary. Everyone please stand back and let us move her quickly."
Julia stepped back and watched as the nurses gathered all the equipment and moved everything out with Kensi. Deeks walked over to Julia and told her not to worry, that Kensi would be ok, she just needed more time.
Sam and Paris left the room first and ran into the police coming down the hall. They held them back until Kensi was out of the room and then let them proceed with their work.
Sam watched as they wheeled Kensi down the hall to the new room. As Deeks walked by they looked at each other and Deeks knew he needed to give him a statement as to what had happened in the room behind them.
"Deeks lets grab a coffee and you can walk me through it. The doctor is going to need some time with Kensi before you can see." Without saying a word, Deeks followed Sam down to the cafeteria for their coffee.
"So what happened?"
"What happened? Well that piece of shit decided that destroying Kensi' mind wasn't enough, he came back to finish the job. Something about her screwing up a mission they were on and now he had to clean up the mess she made."
Deeks was already starting to get wound up and Sam could see it.
"Alright… Alright, just take a breath and tell me what went down in that room."
Deeks closed his eyes, ran his hand through his hair and exhaled slowly to get himself under control. Then he continued. "I was in the room standing next to Kensi. She seemed to be trying to wake up when the door opens and in walks Julia with some coffee. A second later in busts the agent…I'm sorry, what's his name?"
"It's Agent Tossner."
"Right…Well he's on the floor and behind him is Sabatino with a gun."
"Didn't he disarm you and Tossner?"
"Yes he did but he didn't see the knife, Kensi' knife. I had it with me for when she woke up. It was the only thing she seemed to have fixated on during our entire encounter so I wanted to use it if I could, to help her with her memory. I was looking at it when everything went down, so I quickly hid the knife under the blanket, next to Kensi' arm, waiting for the opportunity to use it."
"Continue."
"When Kensi starting to move her hand and head Sabatino reacted to it. Tossner kicked the bed distracting Sabatino even more and that's when I threw the knife. At that distance, I wasn't going to miss. I think he got a couple of rounds off, but they hit the floor. "
"Ok then. I guess that just leaves Mattias to deal with."
"I wouldn't worry about Mattias Mr. Hanna, I'm sure his people will be dealing with him." It was Hetty standing next to their table looking at them. "And how is Mr. Deeks?"
"Just peachy Hetty, just peachy."
"She will get better Mr. Deeks, maybe not as quickly as you would like, but she will heal."
"Well I sure hope so. After everything she has gone through."
"You do realize Ms. Blye will need to be debriefed as soon as she is released by the doctor? This process will take some time and it may well bring back memories that she does not want to re-live. However it must be done and unfortunately you cannot be with her during this time."
"Hetty she's going to need me next to her for support. I have to be there."
"I'm sorry but that is not possible. You are LAPD and the information we are looking for will be classified. This matter is not open for discussion."
Sam could see hurt look on his face "Don't worry Deeks; I will be there with her every step of the way."
"Yes he will Mr. Deeks and so will I. We owe her that much."
Hetty gently squeezed Deeks' shoulder before turning and walking away. She needed to speak with Nell and make the proper arrangements for the debriefing. Nate would need to be called in and run the process. A familiar face and friend should make Kensi feel less threatened and make the entire ordeal as civilized as possible.
The sedation seemed to be working as Kensi rested without incidence for several hours; however her dreams were still very animated.
Julia had gone home around midnight so it was just him and her.
It was almost three in the morning and Deeks was sitting in a chair next to Kensi' bed and he was just looking at her and thinking of all the good times they had. He had squeezed in a few hours sleep but that was all.
Kensi head was turned to the side facing Deeks when her eyes slowly opened and focused on him. When she spoke it was low and soft.
"Deeks?" His heart began to race as if she had just fired a starting gun.
"You've been in my dreams." That statement alone was almost too much for Deeks to handle. It was like all his prayers had been answered. She was back and she remembered him. His eyes lit up and his smile grew so large it came close to swallowing his face. The rush of adrenaline made him vibrate in his seat. "That's fantastic Kensi."
She again blinked very slowly but continued to stare at him.
"Why are you in my dreams? Who is Max?" She licked her lips then asked "How do I know you?"
With that all the air was sucked out of his lungs, he slumped into his chair and dropped his head into his chest.
"What… do you… remember?" Deeks let the words fall out of his mouth.
"I'm not really sure what I know. It's like looking at a photo album with pictures that you're in but have no idea on the history behind them. I know you and I were there but nothing else. I'm sorry." She could see the hurt in his eyes but she really didn't remember him and she wasn't going to lie to him. It was obvious they had been together at one time and she assumed they were close so she owed him the truth.
"I'm very tired. Can we continue this in the morning?"
"Yes…Yes, I'm sorry. You need your rest. Get some sleep."
She blinked once, as if to say thank you and went to sleep. Deeks tried to smile but didn't quite make it.
The rest of the night was a long one for Deeks as he sat just staring at her, the thoughts in his head ricocheting off one another causing him to sink deeper into a darkness he hadn't felt in years. When the morning finally arrived it only got worse for him.
Kensi was awake and having some juice when Julia walked into the room. The first words out of Kensi' mouth was "Mom!" She stretched her arms out to greet Julia who was standing there dumbfounded. Deeks had called her earlier in the morning and warned Julia that Kensi wasn't remembering anything. Well surprise, surprise, some memories were still there, just not the ones with Deeks in them.
"Kensi. Oh my God I'm so glad that you remember me. This is wonderful." Within minutes the two ladies were waltzing down memory lane reliving the time when Kensi was a little girl and her father was still alive. Feeling like a third wheel Deeks slowly moved towards the door "I'm going for a coffee can I get you anything?"
"No, no we're fine thanks." was the reply from Kensi and with that he left the room.
As Deeks walked down the corridor he felt like he had a thousand pound weight on his heart slowly crushing it. Directly in front of him was Dr. Noslo just standing there watching him with her head tilted to one side.
"You look like you just lost your best friend."
"I think I did, again. Doctor, why is it that she can remember her mother so well but not have any real memories of me?"
"Well, this is something called Ribot's Law where she will lose recent memories and retain the older ones. She may never remember anything from the last few years or so. We just don't know. She has now experienced trauma to her brain twice in a few short years. Her mind could be like Swiss cheese right now, so you really need to give her time to heal. You must be patient with her and help her as much as you can."
"Thank you doctor, it helps a little, I guess."
"I'm going to check in on her now. You look like you need some rest yourself. Why don't you head home and take care of yourself first and then you can start helping her."
"Maybe I will doctor, maybe I will."
Pondering the idea, he decided to go home, rest, if that was possible and clean himself up before returning to see Kensi. She was with Julia now so she would be fine.
As Deeks was walking out of the hospital he ran into Detective Bishop would was handling the case.
"Deeks, I got something for you." He pulled Kensi' knife out his jacket pocket and handed it to him. "I believe this belongs to you. We all hope she recovers fully. Take care of her."
"Thanks Bishop, I really appreciate this."
Deeks knew he had to help Kensi get her memory back. He needed to show her who she was and who they were once a long time ago before that son-a-bitch destroyed her. This knife was going to help him do just that.
When Kensi was released from the hospital she was going to stay with her mother. The two of them would slowly work on Kensi' memory and she would have a place to call home. Stability would be very important to the healing process.
The debriefing progressed excruciatingly slow as the details being requested by NCIS and the CIA just were not there. They tried providing Kensi with pictures of the targets, the locations of the missions and the weapons that were used, but nothing seemed to trigger any new memories. In her mind, it was like it never happened. Nate finally decided that any further questioning would be fruitless and would only served to frustrate her more. If the memories ever did return, they could try again then, but for now they were done.
During the time Kensi was being debriefed, Deeks had no contact with her what so ever. It drove him almost insane to know she was just minutes away and yet he couldn't talk to her or see her. He needed to talk to Kensi and give her the knife back. It would be a start and maybe if he was lucky it would help in her recovery.
As the days past Kensi was adjusting to life with Julia and the peace and quiet of a normal existence. Julia had a few old photo albums in the house and so they spent many an hour looking at the pictures and reminiscing. They would talk all day whether they were having a meal, or by the pool, or out shopping, basically just enjoying their time together. This was something Julia never had with Kensi and it was wonderful.
Unfortunately the memories did not materialize as quickly as everyone had hoped. Kensi would make regular visit to the doctor to monitor her physical progress but there was very little else they could do for her. Her hair was growing back, of course too slow for her liking, but still progressing along.
But something was bothering Kensi. She couldn't put her finger on it, but it was still there just under the surface.
Julia had been slowly bringing up the subject of Deeks when ever she could insert him into the conversation, but Kensi never took the bait. She never asked more than a question or two about him or even about the two of them and that worried Julia.
She would call Deeks every day or so and give him updates on Kensi' condition and she could sense his growing anxiety and frustration, but they knew it was going to be a long recovery so they needed to respect the process.
Julia had arranged for Deeks to come over for dinner and hopefully to start spending more time with Kensi as she continued to heal.
The night finally arrived and Deeks showed up at the house with a couple of bottles of wine and a lot of trepidation.
Dinner was casual, but Kensi seemed tense or nervous the entire night. It was almost like they had been set-up on a date and she was apprehensive about the meeting. They all made small talk, discussing recent events and drinking wine with the lasagne, except for Kensi, she drank water, on doctor's order. The apple pie a la mode Julia made for dessert was devourer mostly by Kensi making Deeks smile. Seeing a glimpse of the Kensi he knew and loved re-energized him with new hope. They had both moved to the couch with some old photo albums while Julia was in the kitchen clearing the plates and giving them time alone to go through the pictures and to re-connect.
"Kensi, I have something for you."
"You do. What is it?"
Deeks reached into in pocket and pulled out the knife. Her eyes opened wide as she reached for it.
"Oh my God it's my father's knife. Thank you so much."
She took the knife and gave Deeks a great big hug. Julia had poked her head into the room to see what was going on and saw them embrace. She had tears in her eyes seeing them together, seeing her daughter take another step forward in her recovery. Julia returned to the kitchen and sat for a moment, just happy at how things were turning out.
Kensi looked at the knife in her hand and then turned to face Deeks. He looked into her eyes and he knew something was wrong.
"What is it?"
"I don't know if I can see you again, at least not for a while until I figure out what I'm going to do about getting my life in order. Almost all of my memories of when I was a girl are back but starting around the time I was engaged to Jack up until now, well they are still just random flashes. The doctors are seeing improvement but it's very slow in coming."
"But I can help with all that. We can go and talk to the team, visit at all your favourite old hang outs; hell the donut place missed you so much it almost went bankrupt when you left for Afghanistan."
He made her laugh, he always did and that spurred him on.
"Please let me help you. I can do this, I really can. Just give me a chance."
Her voice was soft now and she was looking down at her hands as she spoke.
"I don't know you like you know me. We may have had something at one time, but that was then."
She paused for a second and then continued. Deeks' face had started to go white.
"Please understand that I can't do this now. I just don't feel that way about you. I'm so sorry, I just….just don't. You seem like a really good guy so I want to be honest with you."
Deeks was in shock. Never could he have imagined those words being spoken by Kensi to him. He had trouble catching his breath and he started to feel light headed.
"Deeks are you ok? I'm really sorry; honestly I didn't mean to upset you but you needed to know."
"Yeah…uh…yeah…I need to go now. Thank your….mother…uh…dinner. Yeah…ok." He stood looking around totally confused, ran his hand through his hair and rubbed the back of his neck as he headed for the door.
The second part will be out in a few days. Have a good one.
