(For disclaimer and author/story/series notes, see the Prologue.)

0~*~0

Day 5: The Disaster

It was one of the strangest, most unexpected and unnerving feelings Zelos had ever experienced: he was actually nervous about a date.

He had gone on countless dates during his life, but never before had he felt like this: antsy, with his gut churning and his brain pointing out every possible way it could go wrong, all the things he could say or do to wreck it, and why he should back out of it. Dates had always been a specialty of his, something he could easily navigate; he had a routine, with standard lines to say at any given point during it, and the date's events always went smoothly, with the woman swooning over him and then eagerly agreeing to accompany him back to his mansion afterwards for some 'fun.' Every date he'd gone on had always been, in some way, about him, about what he could get from it, not about the hunny he was with—most of whom, he had to admit, were indistinguishable from the others. Oh, he knew exactly what to say to make her feel special, like the date was all about her, but that was never what it was, not really; it was always about distracting and distancing himself from his demons, about releasing pent-up lust, and about proving his life wasn't entirely useless and he had at least one purpose: to pleasure a woman.

But now? Yeah...that wasn't really the case now. Not in the least.

In fact, as he went to answer his door only to find his date and his alternate standing on the other side, the only thing he could think was that he really, really didn't want to go out with Sheena Fujibayashi.

Never before had he dreaded a date like this; never before hadn't he even been in the mood for a date. It wasn't that he didn't want to spend time with Sheena, catching up with her and trying to repair their broken friendship; he did, especially if it meant a chance to wipe the slate clean and try to do something right with her for once. It wasn't that he wasn't looking forward to taking her to the restaurant he'd selected for them, either; it was the nicest one in town, and he'd never failed to impress any hunny he took there. It wasn't that he wasn't looking forward to getting out of his mansion for awhile, especially after the past few days of being cooped up there while he'd tried to figure out what was going on with the 'other him'; he really was eager to go out on the town again. After all, any date he went on was always full of possibilities, and this one was no exception, especially since it was with the one woman he'd always wanted to go out with.

No, the problem was that he already knew there was no way this 'date'—if Sheena even agreed to call it that—could end well. He was still convinced this was a horrible idea. He would have to carefully scrutinize every single word he said for fear he'd mess everything up before they even reached the restaurant. According to his alternate, he would have to tell her a ton of crap about himself that he'd never told anyone before, and he had no idea how to do that. And, most damning of all, the woman he was going out with was Sheena Fujibayashi, someone who, despite his feelings for her, he had royally hurt, betrayed, pushed away, and basically been a gigantic jackass toward for most of the time he'd known her. He had gotten things with her so wrong that they could never be fixed; they were way past the point of getting a 'clean slate.' How was this supposed to go smoothly when she was right not to be able to stand the sight of him? Why were they even bothering with this, especially when it was painfully clear he in no way deserved a second chance with her after the hell he'd put her through?

No, he definitely wasn't happy about this date, and really, all he wanted to do was crawl under a rock rather than have to deal with the inevitable failure and ultimate rejection that would be coming from it. But naturally, she'd shown up on his doorstep right on time. From the second he'd opened the door, she'd made it clear that she wasn't entirely happy about this, either; all she'd said to him was a simple, "Hi," and then she'd resorted to talking solely to the other version of him, someone she clearly felt more comfortable with. Heck, she couldn't even look at Zelos for more than a second before looking away again. Zelos couldn't blame her, not at all, but still...it didn't alleviate his nerves or dread to know that she really didn't want to talk to him.

Because she hadn't known where Zelos was planning to take her, Sheena had brought a few clothing options with her to change into. Apparently, his short-haired alternate had suggested she do so, and—surprise, surprise—she'd actually listened to him. Once Zelos told her where he'd gotten reservations for them, his alternate helped her pick out an appropriate outfit, and then she headed upstairs to his guest room to change.

"That was actually where I'd planned to take her on our first date, too," Zelos's doppelganger said.

Zelos arched an eyebrow. "'Planned to'?"

"Something came up and it didn't work out. We ended up having an impromptu picnic instead. Had a great time, too."

...Ah. A picnic. "I didn't even consider that possibility."

"But she does like this restaurant, too," his alternate quickly added. "I've taken my Sheena there a few times myself. We even celebrated one of our wedding anniversaries there." He shrugged. "Overall, Sheena's not much for fancy Meltokio restaurants. If given the choice, she'll pick a picnic over it any day. But she doesn't mind this one, either, so you should be fine tonight."

...Yeah, wonderful. That was just what he'd wanted to hear when he was already not looking forward to this: that he'd picked the wrong venue for this date. Well, on the bright side, maybe it would work to his advantage and end the date sooner than it would have otherwise and then they could get on with their normal lives? But...agh, what was he thinking? As bad of an idea as this whole 'date' thing was, he really did want her to have a good time tonight, so he had to readjust his mindset, and quick, before he was the one who ended up wrecking it. As hard as it might be, he had to make sure that didn't happen.

But before he could sufficiently bolster his nerves, there she was, walking down the steps toward them, looking amazing in a simple but pretty, sleeveless, purple dress, and his heart nearly stopped. This was actually happening: he was going out on a date with this woman, someone he'd wanted to go out with for years...this was nothing less than a dream come true! And yet he couldn't help thinking this was his worst nightmare, too, especially as she eyed him warily when he smiled at her, a signal he took as a warning to take extra care over everything he said and did. Instantly, his smile vanished and his nerves flared again, silencing his tongue from saying all the things he wanted to say: how amazing she looked (possibly even more beautiful now than she had been years ago), how glad he was to see her again, how grateful he was that she hadn't killed him yet and had given him this chance, and how sorry he truly was for everything he'd done to her. And her next words, spoken without any hint of amusement to the other 'him,' didn't help any, either.

"Remind me again why I agreed to this?"

"You know why," his alternate replied softly, giving her a pointed look.

Zelos forced himself to ignore her doubt—not to mention his own sudden nausea—and give her a smile, willing his nerves to behave. Yep, tonight was going to go so very well, wasn't it? By the end of the night he fully expected she would have either killed him or, worse, completely ravaged his heart by rejecting him for good, and chances were he'd never see either one coming until too late.

"Ready?" he asked her.

Sheena nodded faintly, albeit still not meeting his eyes. "Yeah."

...He truly wasn't sure he could go through with this. And so, to try to relieve his nerves, he resorted to his constant companion: humor. He gave his alternate a pointed look. "Don't wreck the place."

The other 'him' sighed exaggeratedly. "Damn, there goes my plan to completely disassemble all the furniture while you're gone."

Sheena snorted softly; apparently she had forgiven him for 'betraying' her the previous day if she was laughing at his jokes. And suddenly Zelos couldn't help wondering what kind of feelings she had for the man. Had she fallen for him? Should Zelos be jealous of him? Not like he had any right to be jealous of any man she was interested in, but still, a gnawing pit in his stomach was making him think that was exactly what this was. It was ridiculous to be jealous of him—the man was him, for crying out loud!—and yet he couldn't stop himself from wondering. After all, if she was falling for that other him, what chance did he stand with her? The guy was, after all, a more mature, responsible, respectable, and all-the-way-around-improved version of him. Literally. Not to mention he'd never done half of the things to her that Zelos had.

...But he couldn't think about that long since his alternate quickly ushered them out the door, and a second later Zelos found himself outside with Sheena, the light of day beginning to fade. Taking a deep breath, he forced a smile for her—more feebly than he liked, but he couldn't manage more than that, given the current circumstances—and then offered her his arm. The best thing he could do was probably take the sweet, gentlemanly route with her. "Shall we?"

For a moment Sheena just eyed his outstretched arm warily, but then, to his surprise, she actually accepted it, letting him guide her toward the restaurant. Granted, she still wasn't smiling, but the fact that she wasn't shying away from touching him was still a hopeful sign. They walked in silence toward the restaurant—not because Zelos didn't want to talk to her, and not because he had nothing to say to her, but because, well, he honestly had no idea what to say at that point, and because he was afraid to say anything yet and mess it up before they'd even reached their destination. On their way, Zelos could see a few of his hunnies out and about, looking at them curiously, unsure who he was with that night. The minute they got a closer look, though, a few of the bolder ones actually had the gall to approach them, smile and wink at him seductively, mouth "Later!" to him, glare at Sheena, and then head off, giggling, but Zelos just ignored them and smiled at Sheena as she looked at him uncertainly, clearly trying to gauge what he would do.

After the fourth time that happened, though, she finally frowned and spoke up. "What, you're not going to make plans with them for later?"

A test...this was definitely a test. He could handle this. "Nope."

But she just shrugged and looked away from him. "Hey, if that's what you want, you don't have to turn them down on my account. After this you're free to do whatever—or whoever—you want. We're just going out to talk, remember?"

Zelos looked her over carefully, trying to gauge if she was still testing him, if she was expressing jealousy over all the women he'd been with, or if she truly didn't care either way. Her expression was blank, though, making it hard to tell. Well, seeing as he really didn't give a damn about those women and he did give a damn about Sheena, he'd err on the side of caution. "Actually, I'm hoping I won't ever have to 'see' them again."

Her eyes narrowed and she looked back at him. "And that doesn't bother you?"

"No, it really doesn't," he stated, no doubt about that in his mind. Because while he still didn't think this 'thing' with Sheena had any chance of going anywhere, if she really was considering giving him any kind of chance, then he would do whatever it took not to blow it, including shaking off every single one of his clingy hunnies to prove he was serious. That was one thing he'd realized since his alternate had showed up and completely changed his view of life: he wanted this to work with Sheena. He didn't have a clue how to actually do that, but he wanted it, so badly that it made his heart ache. His alternate had actually married her; he not only had a family he loved dearly, but he had her. He had found true peace and happiness...with her. There was nothing Zelos wouldn't give to receive even a tiny taste of that. If there was any chance at all, even one as slight as this, he would take it, no matter what the cost—his hunnies and all the regular yet ultimately unfulfilling and empty sex he'd had included. In a heartbeat.

Now if only being with her didn't make him feel so damn guilty and uncertain about how to treat her and afraid to say anything for fear of messing it all up.

Sheena eyed him another moment, probably trying to determine if he was serious, and Zelos offered her a smile, hopeful that she would take that the right way, not as a lie intended to manipulate her into trusting him. She didn't say anything, nor did she return his smile, but she did finally nod and look ahead of them as they continued walking. A few minutes later they reached the restaurant. He held open the door for her, a gesture she seemed reluctant to accept but did anyway, and then he was asking the waiter to find them a quiet table away from the main crowd.

Thankfully, being the ex-Chosen and a frequent patron of the restaurant, he was usually able to get whatever he wanted here, and tonight was no exception. The room where they ended up wasn't completely empty, Zelos noted as the waiter led them to their table, but at least it had fewer people than normal. He offered Sheena a smile and made a point to take her coat, pull out her chair, and push it in once she'd seated herself before finally sitting himself, and while he could tell the attention made her uncomfortable, she didn't stop him either—which he also choose to take as a good sign.

After a moment, she took a deep breath and looked around the room. "This place seems nice enough."

Okay, small talk. He could handle this. He gave her half a smile. "I hoped you'd like it. The food here is good."

Sheena nodded faintly, but then she fell silent again as she picked up the menu and started looking through it. Zelos had to bite back a sigh of disappointment; so much for the small talk. And the thing was, he still had no idea how to talk to her when she was acting like this: polite, but wary and vaguely cold and distant and disinterested, clearly uncomfortable being out with him, whether this was a full-blown date or 'just two friends catching up.' He couldn't blame her, but he'd been hoping for a little more from her. She had agreed to this, after all, with surprisingly little arm-twisting on his alternate's part.

After a few minutes, thankfully, she did talk to him again, pointing out that she had no idea what half of the dishes on the menu were and asking what she should order, and so Zelos summoned every bit of knowledge he'd ever known about her tastes to try to guide her to the right choice. Also thankfully, she accepted his recommendation for a chicken and rice dish, and they placed their orders.

Not so thankfully, though, soon after the waiter had left, a hunny who Zelos had noted—but made a point to soundly ignore—sitting nearby with a nice-looking guy approached their table. The most bizarre part, though, was that even though she was obviously on her own date, she still came over, in her date's line of sight, and abruptly interrupted them, saying, "Why, Chooooosen! I never expected to see you here tonight! You know, if you want to meet me later for some 'fun'"—she inserted an exaggerated wink that made her look not only like a wanton wench, but utterly ridiculous—"I would be delighted to do so."

Zelos cringed. She was one hunny he had always regretted inviting into his bed because her voice sounded like a shrill, screeching cat and she was especially possessive, catty, and annoying when it came to his other hunnies. He'd been in an especially bad, dark place those nights, but it still hadn't excused resorting to using her to dull the pain. And now...now it appeared his indiscretion was going to bite him on the ass by making Sheena suffer for it. It took all his restraint not to tell her to shut up and go away.

Instead, he forced a smile for her, hoping, for once, that she got the message that he was being as blatantly fake and dismissive as possible. "I don't know if you noticed, but I'm a little busy right now."

But naturally, she didn't take the hint. No, instead she turned her attention to Sheena, her lips curling in distaste. "Don't I remember you? Oh, right, you were that country hick with the...interesting...fashion sense that always used to hang around Meltokio, aren't you? I hadn't even noticed you weren't here! Why don't you go back to...whatever backwater town you're from and find yourself a caveman to chase around instead? Master Zelos deserves better than a plain, ordinary girl like you." Her overly painted blue eyes snapped back to Zelos and she beamed him a lustful smile. "Come on, Chosen, come see me later, at the usual place! I'll make it worth your while..."

Zelos couldn't believe the gall of this woman, not only to say that to Sheena's face, but while he was sitting right there. She must really feel threatened and desperate if she'd resorted to such lowbrow tactics to publicly insult her. His heart sank as Sheena's face grew bright red with obvious embarrassment and fury. It was painfully obvious to him, if not to this hunny, that she was about ready to punch the woman's lights out and then storm out of there, neither of which Zelos could have. But fortunately, he had ammunition she didn't have against this girl—ammunition that wouldn't get either of them permanently banned from the restaurant.

He cleared his throat and raised his voice so everyone in the room, including her date, could hear him, and then pointed at her face. "Oh, Matilda, you might want to take a look at that. Your makeup has a smudge." His eyes narrowed, and he pulled a face. "Ooh...doesn't look like you've been able to get rid of that rash you were complaining about two weeks ago yet, either. Y'know, the one you said makes you look like the cross between a tomato and a horse and that's spread all the way down to your—"

As anticipated, Matilda immediately turned bright red and squawked—in a decidedly unladylike fashion—before he could even finish, and she immediately ran out of the room. Off to his side, Zelos could see her date gape first at the doorway where she'd disappeared, then at Zelos, horrified, but instead of immediately running after her, he instead began shoveling food into his mouth, as if in a hurry to get out of there before she could return.

Zelos smirked, pleased by his handiwork, and, for the first time since leaving his mansion, he was actually able to get a half-smile out of Sheena. "Thanks," she said.

And just like that, Zelos could see why Sheena preferred private picnics to public restaurants, especially if they ran into vicious hunnies wherever they went in Meltokio. "I'm really sorry about that, Sheena. Anyone who knows her knows not to take her, or anything she says, seriously."

She nodded faintly, the smile on her lips falling. "I thought women in Meltokio were supposed to be more polite and refined than that."

"Usually they are, but unfortunately that doesn't hold true when it comes to someone they deem their 'competition' for a guy's affection," he replied. "If I had a gald for every time a hunny has stabbed another in the back trying to get my attention, I'd be...well, I'd be far richer than I already am. That entire spiel from her just means she sees you as someone beautiful enough to be a threat to her. In a way, it's actually a backhanded compliment."

Her eyes fell to the table. "...If you say so."

Any smile she'd had a minute ago was now gone, and Zelos could feel himself panicking again. This wasn't going well so far, with Sheena still exuding no relaxation or happiness, and he wasn't sure how to salvage it. He wasn't sure if she was upset because of Matilda and her stupid insults, or if despite his best efforts to watch everything he said, he'd still managed to say something careless that gave her the wrong impression about him, or what, but he was fumbling for something to say that would magically turn the night around. Well, okay, and so he was hoping to put off having that major conversation he knew they were actually here to have for as long as he could, too.

In lieu of any better options, and deciding to put off that discussion until after they'd eaten, Zelos decided to take a stab at countering Matilda's insults in case that was still bothering her—and, as an added benefit, he could relay how glad he was to be there with her. "You know, Sheena, whether Matilda meant her words as an insult or a backhanded compliment, you really do look beautiful tonight."

But her reaction was the last thing in the world he'd expected. Instead of blushing and smiling shyly, Sheena instantly froze, stared at him a moment through guarded eyes, and then looked down at the table, her face not growing red, as he'd expected, but rather pale. For a long moment she didn't say anything, not to thank him for the impossible-to-misinterpret compliment nor even to brush it off out of humility, and Zelos could tell that something wasn't right—a hunch that grew more certain with each passing second. A knot was growing in his stomach in a way that told him he had just messed up with her, badly, and a sudden wave of desperation washed over him.

"What?" he pressed, leaning toward her. "Sheena, what is it? What's wrong?"

But instead of answering him, instead of even looking at him, Sheena pushed her chair back and, to his horror, whispered, "I can't do this. Excuse me." And then, as he watched, blinking blankly, blindsided, she hurried to the door.

Zelos rose to his feet, his lips parted. "Sheena?"

But she didn't turn back toward him, and next he knew she was gone. It took his stunned brain a moment to realize she wasn't just heading for the restroom or outside to get air, but that she had grabbed her coat and was leaving the restaurant. Naturally, the waiter chose right then to show up with their food, delaying him from following her while he said they had to leave and that the restaurant should put it on his tab. By the time he'd worked his way through the restaurant, asking people on his way if they'd seen her, to which the man at the door said she'd just left, she was nowhere to be seen outside. He had no idea where she was going, but he knew he had to find her. He jogged a bit down one side of the street, but he still didn't see her, and so he decided to head back to his mansion. Her clothes were there, after all, and besides, that was where her other companion was awaiting her. Now he just had to get back there before she hightailed it back to Mizuho.

Talk about an utter disaster and failure of a night.

Zelos had a sinking suspicion that any hope, no matter how small, that he'd once had of fixing everything with her had just been completely blown, and he had no idea how or why. It was likely connected to what Matilda had said...and yet Sheena had seemed fine immediately after he'd chased off that stupid hunny. Grateful, even, for getting rid of her as he had. Hell, she'd even smiled! If the problem really had been connected to Matilda and what she'd said, wouldn't Sheena have left sooner? Unless...she'd just decided the entire 'date' situation with him had been too weird and she'd given up altogether? For the life of him, he just didn't know. He just knew he'd somehow messed it up, badly.

Reaching his mansion, Zelos rushed inside. Thankfully, he could tell right away that Sheena was there since his alternate was standing at the bottom of the steps, about to climb them, looking concerned as he called her name. "Where is she?" Zelos asked him.

His alternate looked back at him, his eyes wide and demanding. "What the hell happened? What did you do? You two weren't even gone an hour!"

"I have no idea! She just ran off a minute ago without a word of explanation."

His short-haired alternate turned and walked directly up to him. "What did you do?"

Zelos threw his hands up in sincere ignorance. "Nothing! Honest!"

"You had to have said or done something," the other 'him' prompted. "She wouldn't have come back here otherwise."

"I don't know," Zelos replied. "Seriously. I mean, Matilda came up to us at the restaurant, insulted Sheena, and I insulted her back and chased her off, but I'm not sure if that's connected to why Sheena left."

His doppelganger shook his head. "No, she wouldn't have run off because of one of your hunnies, especially not if that hunny had already left. What did you say after that?"

"Nothing!"

But his alternate took another step closer to him until they were standing mere inches apart. "What. Did. You. Say?!"

"I'm telling you, I didn't say anything! I told her she looked beautiful tonight, and she excused herself and ran off!" To Zelos's utter amazement, his alternate suddenly backed off, groaned, and let his head sink downward, burying his face in his hands. This was making absolutely no sense. "What? What did I do?"

The other 'him,' though, just shook his head, lowered his hands from his face, and sighed. "I should've known. I probably should've warned you about that...it's just been so long since it's been a problem in my world that I completely forgot about it." He cleared his throat and met Zelos's eyes. "All right, let me talk to her. We'll get this sorted out."

...What? What the hell? What was the problem? Zelos still had no idea what had just happened. "I don't get it. What's going on? What's wrong with what I said? Did I do something wrong?"

"No, you couldn't have known," his alternate replied, shaking his head again. "Like I said, I'll talk to her."

For a moment, Zelos just gaped as his alternate started heading up the stairs, but then he quickly followed him. "But what...?"

"I accidentally tripped over the same landmine on our first date, and if we'd been in a place where she could've easily run off, she likely would have, just like your Sheena did tonight," he replied, looking back at him, his face sad and empathetic. "I just lucked out that she couldn't and that at that point she'd trusted me enough to tell me what was bothering her and give me a chance to respond to it. This won't be pretty, but you need to hear what she has to say—and you need to hear it directly from her, not from me. Give me a minute. I'll get her back out here." Zelos didn't respond to that—he didn't know how to respond to that, seeing as he was even more confused now than he had been before—and the other 'him' continued up the steps. Before he could press for more answers, his doppelganger knocked on the door. "Sheena? Sweetheart, it's me. Y'know, the other me. I'm coming in, okay?" Zelos didn't hear her respond, but his alternate tentatively cracked open the door anyway and, when she didn't object, he pushed it open fully. "Stay here," he told Zelos, and then he stepped inside and closed the door, locking it behind him.

And so, frustrated, confused, and impatient to find out what the hell was going on, Zelos leaned back against the wall beside the door, folded his arms to his chest, and did the only thing he could do: wait.

0~*~0

The first thing Sheena did upon reaching the safety of Zelos's guest room was change back into her typical, far more comfortable attire. The next thing she did was sit down on the bed and try to regain control over her pounding heart, her racing thoughts, and her raging emotions. She felt utterly exhausted, her confusion was overwhelming, and at that point, she wanted only one thing: to go home and forget tonight had ever happened.

The 'date' itself—not that she was sure she wanted to call it that yet—had actually been going relatively well, despite her reservations. Zelos had not only paid his hunnies no heed, but he'd gotten that one tramp off her back and made it clear he was there with her tonight. The restaurant itself had been nice—maybe not her cup of tea, but for a fancy Meltokio restaurant, she hadn't felt completely uncomfortable there, and part of her had actually been curious how the food was. Zelos had been a perfect gentleman the whole time, exuding no smug, smarmy, cocky, or obnoxious behavior. In fact, he'd been surprisingly calm and subdued the entire time, maybe even a bit nervous, she'd thought, which was so out of character for him that she'd had trouble believing what she'd been seeing.

And then he'd...well, then he'd reverted right back into his typical Zelos Wilder ways by trying to win her over the way he did every single hunny he met: by flattering her on her appearance with empty, insincere platitudes meant to pass as compliments.

Sheena released a low sigh, disappointment washing over her. As much as she'd been dreading this 'date' and had been questioning her decision to agree to it, a tiny part of her that she hated to acknowledge existed had actually been hopeful tonight: hopeful it would be the start of a massive change in her life, hopeful that she really had been wrong all this time about Zelos, hopeful that he would let her see a man who resembled the alternate Zelos, hopeful that one day she could call him a friend again, maybe even something more, like she'd apparently found in that mirror world. She wasn't sure what she'd wanted most from tonight—proof that he really had loved her once? Proof that he really wasn't a horrible human being? Proof that, given the right circumstances, he could become a man as admirable, helpful, and loveable as his alternate, someone she could actually feel something for?—but whatever it was, she'd wanted it, and despite her fear of being hurt by him yet again, she'd allowed herself to have hope.

What a fool she'd been for letting the alternate Zelos plant that hope within her when she'd known all along that the Zelos Wilder of her world simply wasn't a man she could ever have hope with.

As expected, only a minute after retreating to this room she heard the alternate Zelos knock and call to her through the door. She really didn't want to talk to him; tonight's disaster was ultimately his fault, after all, since he was the one who'd talked her into doing something common sense had insisted was a bad idea. On the other hand, though, she also didn't feel like fighting with him right now; she just wanted to go home and never come back here. Succumbing to her exhaustion, she wrapped her arms around herself, stared out the window, and let him come in anyway, grateful to hear the door lock behind him.

"I don't want to talk about it," she said.

From the corner of her eye she saw him nod and approach her, stopping when he was standing off to her side. "I know you don't, but you have to. I'm not leaving until we have."

Sheena frowned, but she wasn't mad, not at him, not really. "Zelos, I know you only want to help, but I just...I can't do this. Any of this. Not with him."

"Yes, you can," he replied with a ridiculous, in her mind unwarranted, amount of certainty. After a moment he sighed and sat down beside her. "Look, don't bother trying to hide the truth about what you're thinking or feeling from me. I know what he said to you, and I know why you're upset about it. I know because I said the same thing to my wife once, and she reacted in nearly the same way you did. The difference is, she didn't run away from me. Instead, she told me what she was thinking and explained how my words made her feel. It was...well, it was very eye-opening for me. As ugly as facing the truth was, you were right to be upset about it, and I needed to hear that." Sheena didn't reply, unsure what to say, and Zelos gently touched her arm. "C'mon, Sheena, talk to me."

Naturally, yet again he knew what she was thinking and why 'her' Zelos's words had bothered her. His insight into her mind was really rather annoying. With a sigh, she relinquished the fight. Fine, if he wanted to hear this, then she would tell him. "Everything was going well before that, too. The restaurant was nice, he'd chased off his hunnies and was acting so nice and sweet and normal toward me..."

"...And then he called you 'beautiful.'"

She nodded faintly. She knew it sounded ridiculous to react like that over a compliment, but she couldn't help it. His words had hurt, and they'd finally pushed her past her ability to tolerate the 'weirdness' of the whole night. "He says that to every woman he meets. I've heard it, Zelos. Every single woman—except me. Me, he always made fun of, ogling these," she pointed at her chest, "and saying they're my only attractive feature. And then tonight he suddenly throws that word at me, too, just like he has at everyone else. It's nothing more than his insincere, syrupy way of flattering a woman—any woman, no matter how plain and ugly she may be." Her voice lowered as she added, "Like me," but then she cleared her throat, her voice resuming its natural tone. "I know how stupid this sounds, because it's not like I've ever been trying to impress him and I've never cared about how he saw me, and I'm not even sure why it's bothering me so much now, but I'm no different to him than any other of his hunnies. He proved that tonight."

"So it truly does bother you," he clarified.

She hated this, admitting such things to anyone. This was why she hadn't wanted to talk to him. "It shouldn't, but it does."

"Yes, Sheena, it should," Zelos said with surprising forcefulness. "What I—what he—did to you all those years ago, back before the worlds were reunited, was completely uncalled for. It was wrong. And until that moment when my Sheena told me not to call her 'beautiful' and then explained her feelings, feelings identical to yours, I never would've known how she viewed herself...I never would've known how badly I'd messed up by teasing her and how much damage it—I—had caused her and her self-esteem. Hearing her tell me that, realizing what I'd done...it nearly killed me. But she is beautiful, and I needed to hear her tell me how I'd always made her feel, and, well, it was an extremely important moment for us. Because of it, I was able to do everything I could to try to right those wrongs and convince her just how beautiful and attractive I find her to be.

"And the thing is, Sheena, while I know you won't believe this yet, you are beautiful—truly beautiful—as beautiful as my wife is. You always were to me, despite my stupid teasing. That's why I know the other me was telling you the truth tonight, because remember, for most of our lives, he was me. If I felt that way back then, then so did he, and I have no doubt he still does. He wasn't trying to hurt you by being insincere and flattering you with pretty but meaningless words. He meant it. In fact, he's out there right now, beating himself up, wondering what he did wrong and probably cursing himself and saying it figures, he can't do anything right with you." His voice lowered. "I know I would be."

Sheena's eyes widened. She wasn't sure she believed that yet, but she also couldn't deny that his face was frighteningly sincere. "Wait...you're serious?"

He gave her a pointed look. "Sheena, I would never lie to you about this."

She had to know this. "So...you really do?"

His eyes narrowed. "Do...what? Find you to be beautiful?" Her face was blazing—she could feel it—and she looked down at her hands, embarrassed, again, to be feeling this way. "Oh, Jizou, Sheena, you have no idea how beautiful you are. To this day, you never have recognized it in yourself. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever laid eyes on, and that hasn't changed in the years since I married you. That's been the case since long, long before we started dating, even."

She was stunned. Could it really be? She looked up at him again, that time unable to prevent her hope from resurfacing. "...Really?"

Zelos gave her a faint but certain smile. "Yes, really. And that's how I know he wasn't lying to you. He may have said those words to every other woman before this, because it was what they wanted to hear, but you're the first woman he's said that to and really meant it. Okay?"

Her heart was pounding, and she had to swallow hard, trying to get control over her voice. "You mean, he wasn't just saying it?"

He shook his head. "He wasn't just saying it; he really meant it."

Zelos...found her to be beautiful? Her? Really? Again, she was having trouble believing that, after everything he used to say about how plain she was and how her chest was the only part of her that was special. But if his alternate meant that, then...that meant she had jumped to conclusions about Zelos and his intentions yet again tonight, hadn't she? She had assumed wrong, thinking the worst about him yet again. "And then I...I ran away and completely wrecked everything, didn't I?"

Instead of directly answering that, Zelos bumped her shoulder with his. "And he has no idea what he did wrong, how he upset you, and why you ran out on him, so right now you need to go out there and talk to him. You need to tell him why his words upset you so much. You're not wrong to be upset about it, but you do have to stop running long enough to explain it to him. He needs to know why you reacted like you did, why you don't trust his words. You need to tell him everything you just told me."

Her stomach felt vaguely nauseous, and now she really, really wanted to go home. Zelos had been trying so hard tonight to make sure the date went well—that much had been obvious—and then she'd just run away without telling him the truth or giving him a chance to defend himself. And according to his alternate, she'd hurt him. Again. That was pretty par for the course with her, wasn't it? She always seemed to do that when it came to him. For years she'd been finding ways to hurt the men who loved her. Orochi had loved her, and instead of letting him go so he could find a woman he loved and who loved him, she'd used him as a makeshift husband because she was afraid to look for other options and she'd needed someone to fill that role in her life. Zelos had loved her once, too, and she'd gone off and married another man without even realizing he'd had feelings for her, even though he'd been trying to tell her in his own warped way. It wasn't fair to them...and she really wanted to stop doing that. But how?

"I...I don't know that I can do this," she whispered.

He grasped her hand and squeezed it gently. "Yes, you can. Remember what I said about having to take a chance sometime? This is exactly what I meant. You have to make a decision, take that chance, and do something you might not be comfortable with but that your heart keeps pulling you toward. If you don't, nothing will ever change. This is one of those opportunities to change everything, a pivotal moment that only comes around once in a blue moon, and if you don't take it now, you may not get another one. Don't just take my word for it. You need to listen to what he has to say. If you don't, you'll never be able to get past this or all the other issues you two have. And if you don't get past it, then there's no chance anything good could ever come of this. Is that really what you want?"

The answer was blindingly obvious, even if it was still hard for her to admit it. "...No."

A faint smile graced his lips. "And just remember, he wasn't lying. He really does find you to be the most beautiful woman he's ever met. He wasn't lying at the restaurant, and I think it's safe to say he won't lie to you now, either. I think he's realized that constantly lying and pushing you away aren't the answer anymore, that they never were, and that, in the long run, it's caused far more problems for you both than it's solved. This is your decision, and I want you to stick with whatever choice you make, but I'm asking you to give him a chance. Please. For both of your sakes."

The knot in her stomach tightened even further at the thought of actually admitting all of this to him, the other Zelos, the one she'd known for years and with whom she'd been through so much. This Zelos was right, though: if she wanted anything to change, which she couldn't deny she did, she had to take a chance and see what came of it. Nothing would ever change if she was too afraid to take a step outside of her comfort zone. And right now, as insane as it was to consider, Zelos was the best chance she had...one that, if his alternate was anything to go by, was actually a pretty damn good one, no matter how hard that might be to believe. If Zelos really was, deep down, the same as this man, then she wanted to find him. She wanted to know more; she wanted to see more. If she had to open her own heart to find this man buried there in him, then she would.

There, she had made her decision, and like this Zelos had said, she had to stick to it and see it through. Sheena nodded curtly, refusing to let herself change her mind. "Okay."

Zelos's smile broadened and he motioned at the door. "Then go on. Go talk to him."

Sheena eyed him a moment, working up the nerve to take that next step, then she took a deep breath and forced herself to stand and head to the door, despite the resistance and fear building within her again of actually doing this. Opening the door, she stepped out onto the balcony. It didn't take long to find him; Zelos was sitting on the floor beside the door, his back against the wall, still dressed up in the attractive suit he'd worn to the restaurant, staring ahead of him blankly. The moment she stepped onto the balcony, though, he looked up at her and jumped to his feet, his expression a mixture of concern, alarm, confusion, and even, Sheena couldn't help thinking, fear.

"Sheena!" he said, taking a step closer to her, his brows furrowed. "Are you okay?"

Sheena looked back at the short-haired Zelos as he, too, stepped out of the guest room, but he just nodded to her, urging her to answer. "I'm fine, Zelos," she said.

"What happened?" Zelos pressed with an urgency that indicated his alternate had been right: he really was upset and worried. "What did I do? Was it because of Matilda? Because if that's it, I'll barge into her house right now and punch her in the face—"

Sheena shook her head. "No, it wasn't her."

He blinked at her, confused. "Then what...?"

And again Sheena hesitated, her earlier determination faltering now that the moment of doing this was actually upon her, and the alternate Zelos motioned at her again. "Tell him."

Okay, fine. She couldn't think about this; she just had to do it. She sighed, took a deep breath, and looked back at Zelos. "You said I looked 'beautiful' earlier."

Unsurprisingly, he didn't get it; all he did was stare at her a moment blankly. "Right...? I...I don't understand. You did look beautiful tonight. Still do, in fact."

Her face flushed at his words—words she wanted to hear but that yet again her mind rejected. Her eyes darted back at the short-haired Zelos, but he just frowned and motioned at her, more insistently than before. "Tell him."

Zelos blinked again as he looked between them, his eyes narrowing. "Tell me what?"

C'mon, Sheena, just say it. She pursed her lips, summoned every bit of frustration she usually felt whenever she was with Zelos Wilder, and looked back at him. "Zelos, you say that to every single woman you meet. How many women have I heard you use that line with, calling them a 'beautiful hunny' or 'hey, beautiful'? Far more than either of us could count. Little girls, old women, and everyone in between, not because you find them to be beautiful, but because you want something from them—free handouts, a date, someone to jump into bed with you, whatever. What makes me any different than them? Pretty words lose their impact when you say them to everyone, even though you can't possibly mean it. How am I supposed to know when you're being sincere about that or when you're only saying it because you want something from someone? Especially when you're talking about me?"

His lips parted and his eyes widened. "Wait...you think I didn't mean it when I said you were beautiful?"

Of course that was what she'd thought! Had he really never stopped to think about how his words and actions had come across to her all those years? "Well, how could I? You spent years—years!—teasing me and making fun of me and my looks and saying my only redeeming feature was this." Sheena pointed again at her chest. "So now, out of the blue, I'm suddenly supposed to believe you find me attractive? Especially when I know I'm not?"

"...What?" he whispered, his face twisting into an expression that looked an awful lot like horror. "You don't...you don't really believe that, do you? That you aren't beautiful?"

Her face was burning again. "What? I'm not! I'm plain, and ordinary, and nothing a hotshot jock like you, someone who can have any woman you want, would even consider if it weren't for this guy," she pointed at the other 'him,' "planting strange ideas in everyone's heads. You're the one who for years called me 'stupid' and 'boring' and 'plain' and a whole lot of other things I don't want to remember that just reemphasized what I'd already known about myself!"

"...Sweet Martel, what have I done?" And then Zelos did something she never expected: he became very, very quiet, his shoulders drooped, and face grew so pale that it looked almost white. "Sheena, I'm sorry. I am so, so sorry. I...I never thought...I never realized that you...that you actually believed me about that. You were supposed to hate me for saying such dumb things about you, not believe me about it!"

"See, that's the problem," the alternate Zelos said softly. "Despite your intentions, Sheena never did hate you for that. I know because it didn't work for me, either. Instead of making her hate you, all you were doing was hurting her."

Zelos's eyes widened even as Sheena's narrowed. What were they talking about? It had been Zelos's intent to 'make her hate him'? Why in the world would he want her to hate him? But before she could figure that out or even voice her confusion, Zelos looked back at her. "Oh, Martel, Sheena, I never...I never meant to hurt you like that..." He briefly fell silent, but then suddenly he nodded, more to himself than to her, his face hardening. "Y'know what? Tonight was a huge mistake. I knew this 'date' was pointless and a bad idea, and this is exactly why. I've messed up far too badly with you to ever fix it. You're right to not trust me or want anything to do with me ever again. All I can say is, I'm sorry. I won't bother you or waste your time again." The change that came over him was so sudden and drastic that she had trouble recognizing what she was seeing, and as a result, she didn't even think to stop him as he turned and quickly retreated to his bedroom.

Fortunately, the alternate Zelos was better capable of comprehending what was happening. Before his long-haired counterpart had even vanished inside, he stepped forward, his brows furrowed. "What the...that's it? You're just gonna leave?" But Zelos didn't stop; he just closed the door behind him. The other Zelos threw his hands out in frustration. "Agh, for the love of...again with the running away?! Jizou, if it's not one of you, then it's the other! I can't win with you two!"

Sheena shook her head and folded her arms to her chest. She still didn't understand what 'her' Zelos had meant, and she still had no idea what she was thinking or feeling about this—vindicated finally being able to tell Zelos how he'd always made her feel? Empty and disappointed that this bizarre experiment was now over? Relieved because she wouldn't have to deal with this craziness anymore?—but one thing he'd said did make sense. "I don't know, Zelos, maybe he's right and this really is pointless. I mean, I know you only mean well here, but—"

"No," he cut her off, his eyes sharp as he looked back at her, just daring her to argue that. "I'm not giving up on you two, not yet." With a sigh, he closed his eyes and rubbed his face. "Man, I wish my wife was here..."

Yeah, she supposed he did. He'd been here several days now, away from his family...away from her. "Because you miss her?"

"No, because...well, yeah, that too, but mainly because I could really use a hug right now. Not to mention a reminder that we really aren't this hopeless and stubborn anymore." He lowered his hand, looked back at her thoughtfully, and then gently grabbed her arm and tugged her toward the door, his face once again set. "C'mon."

And just like that, she felt her panic rising again. "Zelos...what are you doing?"

"You two are going to see this conversation through whether you like it or not." He didn't even bother knocking on 'his' door; instead, he threw it open and dragged Sheena inside, only releasing her once they were standing beside the bed where the other 'him' was sitting, the picture of defeat. "Uh uh. Sorry, buddy, but you don't get to take the easy way out by running away from this. You two are going to work this out, even if I have to lock you in here to make it happen. Now listen carefully, both of you. You two are a mess. I get it. So were my wife and I. But y'know what? We figured it out, and so will you. I believe in you two, and I sure as hell hope that one day you do, too. No, our marriage isn't perfect. Sheena has made decisions that have hurt me more times than I care to remember. I've done the same to her. I regret an awful lot of the things I've done, and I know she does, too. Serious relationships are a lot of work. They're hard, and they're painful, and they're downright frustrating and infuriating at times, and that's especially true when the two people in it are as different and difficult as we are.

"But in spite of that, what we have is worth it. I love that woman more than life itself. I would do anything for her. She must feel the same about me if she's stuck with me this long, not to mention I wouldn't be standing here right now if she didn't. My point is that you can make this work if you want it to, even with all the extra baggage you guys have that we didn't. You just have to put the time and effort into it to make it work. Don't think about it too hard or talk yourself out of it by listing all the reasons why it's a bad idea; just do it. I really don't think you'll regret it. We're worth fighting for."

Sheena folded her arms to her chest as the short-haired Zelos drew her further forward, until she could see his alternate's guilt-ridden, anguished face where he sat on his bed, staring intently at his hands, an uncharacteristic blush on his cheeks. When neither said anything, though—because honestly, Sheena still had no idea what to say when she wasn't even sure yet if she wanted to talk to 'her' Zelos again or would rather just give up for good—the alternate Zelos sighed, his voice softening. "Look, I know how hard this is for you both, but I only have one more day here. That means I only have one more full day to mediate between you two and try to iron out all of your misunderstandings and mistaken conclusions. You two need to talkreally talk. Sheena, tell him your concerns and your feelings. Don't hide them from him; he needs to know the truth. And you," he turned to the other 'him,' "tell her your reasoning behind your choices, why you treated her the way you did. She deserves that much, don't you think?" Zelos didn't reply, but Sheena did see his eyes fall further downward. "And for the love of Martel, you both need to stop running away from the conversation the second you start feeling uncomfortable with it!"

Zelos rubbed his face, finally breaking his stillness and showing he truly was listening, then lowered his hand and shook his head faintly, his expression still sad and his voice soft, his words reflecting the depths of his hopelessness. "I just...I have no idea what to say. Nothing I say can make this right; nothing can make up for what I did to her. Sheena's right not to trust me or want anything to do with me ever again. I mean, if the whole point behind why I treated her like that, to make her hate me and write me off as a hopeless idiot she wanted nothing to do with, didn't work, then...then that means all I did was hurt her. I can't even fathom how to try making up for that."

The confusion that arose in her mind finally helped her shake off her shock and find her voice again—because she truly had no idea what he was talking about. "I don't understand, Zelos. You treated me like that because wanted me to hate you? You wanted me to have nothing to do with you? Why?"

Without warning, the alternate Zelos's face lit up and he pointed at them again. "Aha! That sounds exactly like the start of the conversation you two need to have, so long as you actually answer her question. So quit finding excuses to avoid it and just do it." The long-haired Zelos looked up at him, then at Sheena, and then finally back down at his hands, nodding faintly. "Good. No more backing out, then. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna be...somewhere else. I've already experienced this conversation once, and I really don't want to go through it again." He took a step toward the door but quickly stopped and pointed again at them both. "And remember, no more running away. That goes for both of you. If you try it, I'll just drag you back in here until you've gotten everything out of your systems. Got it?" Zelos didn't nod again, but he did sigh and further lower his head. Sheena, still stunned and confused but also curious and desperate for insight into Zelos's reasoning, nodded faintly. He smiled. "Okay. Then have at it. I'll see you guys in a bit."

Sheena watched him leave, and then, once the door had closed, she turned back to Zelos, who still hadn't moved. Too much of what he'd said still didn't make sense, and she really needed answers. "It's a serious question, and it still stands. If you really did love me once like you claim you did, and like he insists you did, then why would you want me to hate you? Why would you deliberately push me away from you?"

For a long moment Zelos continued sitting silently, staring blankly at the floor, but finally he sighed, his voice falling to a whisper. "Because hate is better than pain."

...Say what? He'd spoken so softly that she wasn't sure she'd heard him right—and even if she had heard him right, she didn't understand his meaning. "...What?"

"Because I refused to get you involved in my life," he went on, his voice unchanged. "Because it wouldn't have been fair of me to get you involved in my life."

And still he wasn't making sense. "And why is that?"

Zelos squeezed his eyes shut, but without warning he opened them, rose to his feet, and began pacing the length of his bed, suddenly agitated. "Sheena, do you have any idea how horrible my life was as the Chosen? Do you have any idea what it meant to be the Chosen?"

Sheena blinked, caught off guard by his abrupt change in demeanor. "Well, no, but I know you nearly betrayed us so you could get rid of the title..."

His footsteps faltered and his expression softened. "Yeah, I did, didn't I?" But just as quickly as he'd stopped, he cleared his throat and resumed pacing. "I was born into a family that despised me. My father wanted nothing to do with me because he'd been forced to have a child with a woman he didn't love to pass on his bloodline; my mother was killed by his mistress so her daughter with him could be the Chosen instead; and with her dying breath, my mother told me, in no uncertain terms, that it would've been better if I hadn't been born. My sister was sent to the abbey to keep her out of the way for fear she would pick up where her mother had left off and try to kill me. I was engaged to a woman I've never even met from the second I was born so I could pass on my bloodline to a successor, and I had no choice in the matter. Everyone in the world wanted to be associated with me because of my power and my title, and yet no one really liked me. Hell, no one wanted to know me—not just the Chosen, me. I was worthless; I was a figurehead for the Church, someone everyone wanted to manipulate for their own gain. Women accused me of fathering their children so they could get rich by laying claim to my family's estate. And, the best part, if the situation in Sylvarant ever changed, then I was expected to go out and happily die for people who didn't give a damn about me."

He turned to face her. "My life was pathetic, Sheena. It was a waste of time and space—my own, and everyone else's. It brought with it pain and misery and heartache and death to everyone it touched. I couldn't afford to get emotionally attached to anyone for fear of getting them tangled up in my hellish life. I couldn't afford to let anyone else get emotionally attached to me only to be devastated when I was forced to marry that other woman or when I was summoned to die to 'save the world.' So I did everything I could to prevent that from happening. I didn't get emotionally attached to anyone. I kept everyone at arm's length. I hid who I really was behind the mask of the Chosen One so I could control who everyone thought I was. I flirted with every woman I met, because I could and it was fun, but I didn't let anyone truly fall for me. I couldn't. I couldn't do that to them."

Sheena stared at him, stunned by the spew of words from him—not to mention his sudden anger and irritation and frustration—but she was also still upset because, damn it, her life had sucked, too, and just because he'd been unhappy with how things were for him didn't justify why he'd always treated her like crap. "And yet I was the only one you ever treated like you did, constantly teasing and belittling me. Every other woman you'd flirt with and flatter and treat like a real human being, but me you treated like an annoying, ugly little country girl who wasn't good enough to be your friend."

He pointed at her, his face set but his blue eyes softening. "Exactly, Sheena. You were the only one I ever treated like that—you were the only one I ever cared about enough to do whatever it took to make sure you had nothing to do with my craptastic life. I didn't give a damn about any of those other women so I never had to push them away, but you...you I had no choice. You I needed to push as far away as I could before the life that came with me could destroy you the way it destroyed me and everyone else I cared about." Sheena froze, staring at him wide-eyed, trying to wrap her head around that, but he couldn't hold her gaze long before he turned away again, resuming his pacing. "You were the first person I'd ever met who didn't care that I was the Chosen. You were a real friend to me when we first met—the first real friend I'd ever had. And while I knew better, I couldn't help myself: I grew attached to it. I grew to crave it, that human contact, that emotional connection, that friendship. And then one day it happened: I realized my feelings for you had gone beyond mere friendship and I had fallen for you. Hard. I didn't want to believe it, I tried to ignore it as long as I could, but eventually I couldn't deny it anymore. And so, as much as it killed me, I knew what I had to do: I had to get you out of my life.

"So I pushed you away, the only way I knew how. I figured if I could make you hate me, it would be easier for us both. I'd never have hope for anything more with you, and you'd want nothing to do with me because I was a jerk and a hopeless idiot. I wanted you to walk away and never look back; I wanted to make sure you would never be hurt by being involved with me." He stopped pacing and closed his eyes. "Everything I did to you back then, the teasing, the belittling, the broken friendship...it was supposed to spare you from pain, not hurt you or make you question yourself or your self-image. I'd figured that a woman like you, someone who was so stunningly beautiful, would know you were beautiful and would know better than to listen to an idiot like me and would grow to hate me for being such an ass toward you. I'd figured you were confident enough not to let my stupidity get to you. I didn't...I never thought I'd be feeding your insecurities and reinforcing your view of yourself. If I had, I would've done things differently." His eyes opened again, but instead of looking at her, he turned away, his head sinking downward. "Because whether you recognize it or not, Sheena, you really are a beautiful woman, inside and out. You're the most real woman I've ever known. You've never had to drown yourself in makeup or fancy clothes, like my hunnies do, to be the most sexy, exotic, amazing woman I've ever laid eyes on. You're right, I always used to say that to other women, tell them they were beautiful when I didn't mean it, but you...I really did mean it tonight. I know you have no reason to believe anything I say, but it is the truth."

Sheena remained silent, her lips parted as she continued watching him, and after a moment he sighed, his voice softening as he turned and finally met her eyes, his expression immensely sad...and sincere. "I'm sorry, Sheena. I am so sorry. Everything I did to you back then was inexcusable. After the journey with Lloyd and the gang, I realized all my reasons for pushing you away were finally null and void since I wouldn't have to be the Chosen much longer and I could finally escape that life and be a normal guy. That night of the king's reunification party, when you found me out on the balcony, I'd been starting to reconstruct a new Grand Master Plan for my life, and after you left, I realized I had to start making some major changes if I wanted things to change, especially when it came to my sister...and to you. I'd hoped to ask you out after that, to start trying to make up to you for everything I'd done, but then you resigned as the king's emissary, and...well, I was a coward and kept putting it off. By the time I'd worked up the courage to get off my ass and do something about it, it was too late and you were already engaged to Orochi. And after I learned that...well, you already know how badly I messed up after that."

She was stunned. Her brain was racing over everything he was saying, trying to put together all the pieces of what she remembered happening with the pieces he was revealing to her now, and yet it was completely blank when it came to her own thoughts and feelings on the matter. "I...I don't know what to say."

Zelos shook his head. "Then don't say anything. I know how pathetic I am, how many horrible decisions I've made that have brought you nothing but pain, but I don't want your pity. I don't deserve your forgiveness or your trust, so I'm not even going to ask for it. But that other 'me' was right: it may be years too late now, but you still deserved to hear the truth. And you need to know how truly sorry I am, for every single thing I did to you. If I could do it all over again, I would, in a heartbeat. I still wouldn't want you involved in my life for fear of what could've happened to you, or what the Church might've done to you, but I wouldn't have gone about it the way I did. Not if it meant hurting you again."

Sheena swallowed hard, still struggling to grasp not only his words but all of the implications that came with them. So if she hadn't left that night at the king's party, if she'd been patient with him and given him an opportunity to tell her all of this then...their lives would've been completely realigned to something far different than the current reality. It would have resulted in their happiness, in their starting a life and a family together in Mizuho, in Mizuho still being a thriving village, in Giannovio being removed as the Foreign Minister, in her becoming chief and him becoming chief consort, in Orochi and Grandpa and everyone in Mizuho still being alive...everything would be different. Everything. Everything would be a thousand times better.

Her head might still be floundering trying to wrap itself around this, but one thing was now painfully, devastatingly clear to her—a realization that made her chest ache and her heart yearn and her stomach churn. And suddenly she couldn't stop herself from whispering it aloud. "So all this time...that really could've been us."

Zelos's face twisted in something she could only identify as unbearable guilt and anguish, and he squeezed his eyes shut, looking like he was desperately fighting back tears. "I know," he whispered, his voice cracking, making her heart hurt even worse. Never before had she seen him like this, so dejected and sad and lost. "Believe me, I know. If I'd been less of a mess and a failure of a man, those two might have been us." She looked up at him, but he could only meet her eyes the briefest of moments before looking down again and clearing his throat. "Sheena, I just want you to know that there is nothing in my life that I regret more than everything I did to you. I am so sorry, for all of it. You deserve so much more than this...you deserve so much better than someone as worthless and hopeless and messed up as me." And then, to her surprise, he suddenly looked up at her, walked toward her, and tenderly kissed her cheek, his lips lingering there a moment...and Sheena let him. "I truly hope one day you find the love and happiness you deserve."

Before she could think to respond, he was turning and heading out of the room. It was only then that she realized her body was trembling, her mind was racing uncontrollably, her heart was pounding, and her cheek was tingling where the ghost of his kiss lingered on it; she was a gigantic bundle of tumultuous, confused, erratic, chaotic emotions. Making her way to his bed, she sank down onto the soft comforter where he'd been sitting just a few minutes ago, afraid her legs would give out without its support, and then she tried, desperately, to regain control over her thoughts and emotions so she could figure out what this all meant, what she truly wanted, and what she was supposed to do now.

0~*~0

Zelos was feeling utterly shell-shocked, shaky, and exhausted as he climbed down the stairs in his mansion. He didn't want to think about what had just happened; he didn't want to think about everything Sheena had just said; he didn't want to think about everything he had just said.

"So all this time...that really could've been us."

His heart couldn't take it; the profound sadness in her voice as she'd spoken those words, echoing of a loss they'd experienced long ago but only now could see, matched the desperate ache within him that was threatening to overwhelm him if he stopped to think about it. He wandered aimlessly for a moment, unsure where to go or what to do, his brain repeating those devastating words over and over again in his mind, threatening to drive him insane, until he noticed his doppelganger sitting in the dining room, waiting. Well, as much as he didn't want to think about everything that had happened, and as despairingly decimated and horrible and guilty and disgusted as he felt with himself, right now he could use the friendly support he was sure to get from a man who had been through many of the same things he had. And that meant sucking it up, talking to him, and hoping he recognized that Zelos was currently in no condition for a deep heart-to-heart between two idiot ex-Chosens and went easy on him.

The other 'him' looked up as Zelos stumbled into the room, pulled out a chair, and, with a weary sigh, sat down heavily onto it. "You look like crap," his alternate commented.

"Funny. I feel like crap." Zelos tilted his head, reconsidering that. "I take that back. What I really feel like is the worst human being to ever walk the face of the earth."

The face that looked exactly like his own smirked. "Yeah, believe me, I know that feeling very, very well." He eyed Zelos a moment, then he stood up, headed to the cabinet, grabbed a bottle of Scotch and a glass, and poured him one. "Here, have a drink."

Zelos gratefully accepted it as he passed it across the table. "Thanks."

"Just not too much because I expect Sheena will be down here soon, and trust me, it'll be better for everyone if you aren't inebriated when that happens," he replied, sitting down again.

Zelos snorted and took a sip. "Yeah...I doubt that. In fact, I doubt she'll ever willingly speak to me again after that."

His alternate arched an eyebrow. "I take it you told her?"

He nodded. "Yep."

"Everything?"

"Enough."

"Good. Then I think ten, maybe fifteen minutes is all you have before you have to face her again." Zelos's hand froze mid-sip and he looked at him disbelievingly, but his alternate just shrugged. "Seriously. Trust me. She'll be here. This isn't over yet."

"If you say so," Zelos muttered, resuming his sip. "If I were her, I sure wouldn't be eager to talk to me again."

"Yeah, well, that's the difference between you two," the other 'him' replied with a grin. "Just wait; you'll see for yourself soon enough."

Zelos quickly finished off his drink and set down the glass, reaching for the bottle on the table and pouring himself another one. Right now he needed its help dealing with all this unwanted guilt and despair and self-loathing. "Y'know," he began again, leaning back in his seat, "I truly never meant to hurt her like that. And I'm not just talking about that fiasco when she married Orochi; I mean before that."

His alternate nodded somberly as he got up, headed back to the counter, grabbed another glass, and then sat down again, grabbing the bottle and likewise pouring himself a drink. "I know. Neither did I. But whether you meant for it to happen or not, it did happen; your interpretation of her reactions to everything you did to her was wrong. That isn't something you can change. Once you know the truth, it isn't even something you can run from anymore. Take it from me, running doesn't resolve anything; all it does is put off the inevitable, and usually it makes it worse to deal with later than if you'd just dealt with it right away. Only being brave and facing the situation head-on has any chance of fixing anything."

"Yeah, I think I'm getting that picture," Zelos murmured, taking another sip.

He considered his alternate's words a moment, unsuccessfully trying to put everything he now knew into perspective, but then his eyes fell on his doppelganger's wedding ring as he lifted his glass to take a drink and sudden confusion overwhelmed him again. Knowing now how his teasing had always made Sheena feel, and knowing that this guy had done the same to her in his world, how could she ever, ever, have agreed to marry him, in any universe? What was more, though, he realized he had an unprecedented chance to ask that question and maybe even get not only an answer, but some tips from someone who had been through something similar. If this guy had made it through that nightmare in one piece, maybe there was hope for him yet.

He motioned at his alternate's ring. "So how did you and your wife get past this? How did you even live with yourself knowing what you'd done to her?"

The other 'him' sighed and set down his glass. "Truthfully? It was hard—extremely hard. Learning how badly I'd hurt her, no matter how much I'd believed my actions justified, nearly killed me. After the truth came out, I spent months waiting for her to realize she wanted nothing to do with me and booted me from her life for good. Until that day came, though, I told myself I refused to run away again and that I'd do whatever I could to make it up to her, because that's what she deserved. After all, pushing her away would've just hurt her again, and that simply wasn't an option. So I vowed to use every day she gave me to love her like she deserved and keep her from regretting giving me a second chance." He shrugged. "Something I did must've worked. Well, that or, more likely, I didn't do anything." He paused, considering that. "No, now that I think about it, it really was all Sheena's doing. Never underestimate her, how amazing she is, or her capacity for love and forgiveness. She gave me an unexpected, unwarranted chance, made me want to do better, to be better, and I took it. It helped me become the man I am now. After years of hating myself and wishing I'd never been born, she helped me find the man I'd always wanted to be, someone who actually likes himself, trusts himself, and was able to forgive himself." He gave Zelos a pointed look. "Sheena is an incredible woman. Give her your time, give her your heart, give her your trust and your honesty, and you won't regret it."

Zelos shook his head. As nice as that sounded, he was pretty sure it was impossible. While his alternate might have managed that, he and his wife hadn't had nearly as much baggage to deal with that Zelos and 'his' Sheena did. "I don't know that I can."

"Eh, like I said before, don't think so hard that you talk yourself out of seeing this through, because I know how easy that would be to do. I nearly did it myself a few times. Honestly, you just need to do it, see it through to whatever end may come of it, and let life take you where it will." He quirked a smile and took a sip of his drink. "It probably wouldn't hurt if you gave her that gift you'd gotten her all those years ago, either."

Yeah, right. At this point, what good would that do anyone? "Sorry, but I really think it's too late for that to have any impact now."

His alternate's eyes narrowed. "Oh, I wouldn't be so sure about that. With Sheena, it's never too late for something like that."

Agh, how was this guy so damn confident about this, about her, about them? Zelos eyed him a moment, but then he sighed and waved that off, the frustration seeping out of him. After his conversation with Sheena, he was too exhausted to argue right now. "Whatever. I'll think about it. But you're assuming she'll even give me a second chance. Just because she gave you one doesn't mean she'll do the same here. It's not like I deserve it."

"Maybe; maybe not. Whatever she decides, though, you'll see for yourself soon enough." Without warning, he looked up at something behind Zelos's back and smiled warmly. "Hey."

"Hi." Zelos froze, his eyes widening. Oh, crap. It was her. How had his alternate guessed right that she would be here this soon? He sure hadn't expected this; he'd expected her to sneak out of the house and wash her hands of him for good. He didn't turn to look at her, but he did lower his half-empty glass to the table. "Um, could you give us a minute alone?"

And just like that, disappointment swept over him. She was undoubtedly directing that at him, saying she wanted to talk to his alternate for a bit and he wasn't invited to stay. Well, no need to make her wait. He pushed his chair back and made to stand, keeping his eyes focused anywhere but on her. "Sure."

Before he could take a single step, though, Sheena stepped forward, grabbed his arm with surprising gentleness, and shook her head, her voice soft. "Actually, Zelos, you were the one I wanted to talk to."

His eyes widened again as, that time, he met her gaze. Uh oh. So much for escaping this. He couldn't read her expression, but he also couldn't deny her. For the life of him, he was terrified of what she wanted to say to him, and he could feel the first inklings of panic building within him at having to hear it, but whatever it was—the inevitable rejection, the crushing of the last inkling of hope he still had, or anything else—he had no choice but to hear it out. He observed her a moment, then sat back down as she released his arm. "Oh."

His alternate, on the other hand, smiled and rose to his feet, leaving his glass on the table and heading toward the door. "Yeah, of course. Take whatever time you need." Zelos saw him squeeze Sheena's shoulder encouragingly as he walked past her, and then he was gone. She watched him leave before sitting down in the chair kitty corner from Zelos's. And for the life of him, all Zelos could do was watch her warily, still having no idea what she was planning to say, his heart pounding and his stomach roiling as she fell silent, looking down at her hands.

After a long moment, she took a deep breath and lifted her eyes to his, her face still indecipherable. "I don't forgive you yet. I don't trust you yet not to do anything like that to me again, either. That's going to take me time...assuming it happens at all."

His heart hit rock bottom, and suddenly he couldn't bear to hear the words he was sure would be coming out of her mouth. He never should've let his alternate give him hope, because there never had been any. "I get it, Sheena," he quickly cut her off. "Like I said, this whole thing was a bad idea."

But to his surprise, she frowned and shook her head. "Zelos, let me finish. Please."

...Oh. Damn. She was determined to make him hear this, wasn't she? And really, he deserved it. After what he'd done to her, it was only fitting that he face her head on while she ripped his heart out and tore it apart. "Sorry," he mumbled, his head sinking downward.

It took her a moment to start up again, emphasizing how dumb it had been to interrupt her. He just couldn't control himself when it came to such uncomfortable emotions, it seemed. "I may not forgive you yet, but...I do think I'm starting to understand you and why you made the choices you did."

Zelos shook his head. "Sheena, none of my pathetic reasons could ever justify hurting you like I did."

"No...maybe...I don't know," she admitted. "I need to know more, to see more of the real you, before I'm willing to say one way or the other. But the other version of you is right: I have to take a chance sometime, just make a decision and see it through, or else nothing will ever change." She took a deep breath and lifted her head a little. "And that's why I've decided I want a do-over."

...Wait, what? Zelos's eyes widened and snapped up to hers. "A what?"

He had to admit, the bright red blush gracing her cheeks was adorable; it was obvious she wasn't used to being this forward with anyone. "A do-over. I...I want us to go out on another date and give this another try, one that will hopefully make up for how badly I wrecked tonight's."

...She wanted to go out on another date? He had to be dreaming. It wasn't possible, and he couldn't comprehend that this really seemed to be happening. But there was one thing she'd just said that he did know for certain—something he could not let her believe. He shook his head. "Sheena, you didn't wreck tonight. You were right to walk away. I've said and done a lot of dumb things over the years, especially when it comes to you, and I deserve to be called out on them. I deserve a lot worse than that, actually."

"I'm not denying that, but I did ultimately wreck tonight," she said, lowering her eyes to the table. "I didn't give you a real chance, and I should have. I know you think you're entirely responsible for our...er...fallout all those years ago, but you're not. I'm to blame for a lot of what happened between us, too. I only saw what was on the surface when it came to you, Zelos, and I never dug to see if there was more to you or to the reasoning behind your actions, despite the voice always there in the back of my mind, telling me I was wrong about you."

"I wouldn't have let you dig any deeper," he said, his voice falling further. He felt like he had swallowed a lead pipe.

Sheena arched an eyebrow. "And what makes you think you could've stopped me? No, Zelos, I could've dug a lot harder and deeper with you than I did. Obviously I did in that mirror world, and look where it got us. But I didn't here; you may have cracked some dumb jokes that night at the king's party, trying to push me away, but I was the one who did walk away. I accepted what I saw without questioning it like I should have, because doing nothing was easier than pushing the issue. I mean, after our friendship fell apart the first time, back in school, I always knew something wasn't right with you, because the man you turned into bore no resemblance to the one I'd always known, and I knew something had to be wrong to have caused it, but I was too afraid to find out the truth. I did the same when it fell apart the last time, when I married Orochi. I've done that a lot with you...and that was wrong of me. It's not fair to you that I've always believed the worst about you rather than holding onto the man I knew you were when we first met. You were always my friend, first and foremost, and I shouldn't have forgotten that. I hurt you, too, by not caring about you the way I should have, for not seeing how much more there is to you. I saw what I expected, what you wanted me to see, instead of what was really there. And for that, I'm sorry. There's a lot more to you than I've ever let myself see before. I want to give it a real chance and see where it goes. I want to get to know the real you, the man who pushed me away because of how much he loved me." To his surprise, she grasped his hand and squeezed it. "So please, Zelos, let's give this date another try. Tomorrow night, dinner. And this time I promise I won't run away."

Oh, Martel, that was exactly what his heart wanted to hear. He could feel his hope rising that maybe he did still have a chance to make everything up to her. But the guilt was still too powerful, gnawing at him and telling him to get the hell away from her before he could hurt her again, and his cowardice made him reluctant to take another chance. "It wouldn't change anything, you know," he murmured.

"Maybe, maybe not," she acknowledged. "All I know is that I've made more than enough assumptions about you that have proven to be wrong, and I refuse to make any more." She paused, clearly waiting for him to respond, but when he didn't, she sighed. "Look, if it doesn't work out after we've given this a real shot, after we've talked it all over, then we'll both walk away and never look back. But we'll never know unless we try. I want to try."

Agh, he was so, so torn. Part of him wanted to run away again and go back to his normal, empty life that he deserved, a place where he didn't have to worry about hurting her and she could find something, someone, that she deserved and that would make her happy. The other part of him desperately wanted to agree to her request, to see what might come of another date and maybe even try to attain the happiness they had found together in another life. And for the life of him, he had no idea which side to go with. "I don't want to hurt you again, Sheena. And you know how good I am at doing that."

Zelos could see her swallow hard, visibly fighting back tears. "I may not trust you yet, Zelos, but I truly don't believe you'd do that again."

"Then you're a fool," he whispered, but there was no venom in his voice.

"No, I'm not," she replied. "Well, yes, I am, about a lot things, but not about this. In fact, I've probably seen more of what you're capable of than you have thanks to the time I've spent with the other 'you,' and I know you won't do it again. That much I do trust about you. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong, but I'm willing to take that chance."

He released a low sigh. He didn't remember her ever being this persistent. Why wasn't she running away again? Had she really changed that much? "This is a really bad idea, Sheena."

She squeezed her eyes shut in what looked, incredibly, like pain, of all things. "Please, Zelos."

Damn it, she wasn't giving up, was she? It amazed him that she was fighting so hard over him. But he shook his head, refusing to give in to the part of him that was eager to jump on this opportunity. "Sheena, I'm a huge mess," he pleaded, trying desperately to change her mind before he did something he'd regret. "I'm a broken man. I can't do anything right. You deserve so much more, so much better, than me."

"You're not the only one who's messed up and broken, Zelos," she countered. "I am, too. More than you could possibly know. That's why I think we should give what your alternate suggested a shot and work together to try to fix that broken mirror. If we can't, we can't, and we'll throw it away. But if we can...we've had a glimpse of what could be because of him. The least we can do is try to figure out if we even want to give this a shot. I just..." She frowned as if frustrated over her inability to find the words to express herself. "I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering what might have been without even trying. Do you?"

Of course he didn't. If he never saw her again, he would probably spend the rest of his life wondering what might have happened if he'd chosen to see this through. And while he deserved to beat himself up over all of that day in and day out, she was implying that she would experience the same if he turned her down. And he couldn't have that. She deserved better than to have to live with such regret. "...No."

Sheena gave him a faint, tentative smile and squeezed his hand again. "So please, Zelos. Tomorrow night. Let's give it one last try. I won't run away again, no matter what. I promise."

Oh, heaven help him, he really was a hopeless fool, wasn't he? Was he actually about to let his longing for something better, for a happy, meaningful life, convince him he could conveniently forget that this, what she wanted, was something he knew would be yet another complete disaster, just as bad—if not worse—than tonight had been?

And one look at her pleading, beautiful face, and at her warm, hopeful brown eyes, and Zelos knew his answer. Yes, he was.

He released another low sigh. "...Fine. I won't run away this time, either."

Her smile broadened. "Thank you."

Zelos pulled his hand from hers and pointed at her sharply. "For the record, though, I still think this is a bad idea that's only going to be a waste of time and lead to disaster." And broken hearts, his mind silently added, especially if he let himself get his hopes up only to have to face the inevitable crash once she really did reject him...just like he deserved.

"I guess we'll see, won't we?" she murmured. The two observed each other another moment, but then Sheena—making it clear that, despite her unexpected conviction to see this through, she still wasn't entirely comfortable with this situation herself—quickly looked away and rose to her feet. "Anyway, I'm heading back to Mizuho. There are some things I need to take care of there tomorrow. And then...late afternoon I'll meet you here again. Say, four o'clock?"

He nodded. "Sure."

"Then I'll see you then."

"Yeah."

Sheena eyed him another moment, then she headed out of the dining room. Zelos could hear her talking quietly with his alternate, their words a soft murmur, and then a few minutes later he heard the front door close, but he didn't get up to see them off. Instead he grabbed his half-full drink, downed the rest of it, and leaned back in his chair, wondering what the hell he had just agreed to and if he—not to mention his oh-so-hopeful heart—would be able to survive what was yet to come in one piece.

0~*~0

(Continued in Day 6: The Do-Over)