Opinions

Chapter seven

Digression


"Toby." Spencer whispered. Looking at the man, who had just finished signing in, and was walking towards her. He got up to her, and put his hands on her hips, pulling her into a hug.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean it! I love you so, so much Beautiful." Toby cried into her shoulder. Spencer nuzzled her head into his chest, and started to cry. It was all becoming very real to her.

"I'm sorry." She whimpered.

"What?" Toby pushed her back so her could see her face. "Spencer, no. You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about. This was all my fault. Not yours."

"I almost killed myself Toby!"

"Did you mean to do that?"

Spencer thought for a minute. "No. I was having a panic attack because of the fight we got into. I just wanted it to stop." She sobbed. She fell back into his chest. He rubbed her back, and kissed her forehead.

"Its gonna be okay Spence. We're gonna be okay."

"Spencer?"

She took a step back from Toby, to look at her mother.

"Mom? Wha-what are you doing here?" She said, trying to get her voice back.

"I asked her to come Spence." Toby said, kissing her forhead.

'I wasn't sure you would want me to come baby. Thats why I left you alone." Her mother stated.

"Mom." Was all Spencer could say.

"Spencer, we're taking you home."

"But-"

"No buts. I have a doctors apointment schedualed for tomorrow. Toby, your father and I will all be with you. Everythings going to be okay Spence." Her mother said with a smile. Spencer couldn't help but smile. She couldn't wait to be in her own bed, possibly in Toby's arms as well. "Now, go get your things. I brought clothes for you to change into." Her mother said.

Spencer's smile grew larger, "Okay!" She said, hugging her mother again.

As they checked Spencer out of Radley, Toby kissed her forehead and whispered sweet nothings into her ear.

In the car ride home, they were silent. Toby and Spencer rode in his truck while Mrs. Hastings drove her Rio back to their house.

At the Hastings Manor, Toby helped Spencer out of the truck, before grabbing her bag and leading her back into the house. Sitting on the couch in their living room, was Peter Hastings and Melissa with her own small family. Melissa's husband Robert sat next to her, one of his hands encasing her own, the other holding their 2 year old daughter Taylor in his lap. He was raising his adopted step-daughter with Melissa, she had met him after Ian's death and he had welcomed her infant daughter with open arms. Adopting Taylor as his own within months of the two being together as a couple. In Melissa's arms though, was a new addition to their family. A newborn. No older than 1 week old. Wrapped in a soft, light pink blanket. Spencer gasped at the sight of her second niece. Not aware of her presence until now.

"Mel! You had her!" Spencer cried out.

Melissa looked up at her younger sister with teary eyes. "Yeah, I did Spence!" She smiled. "Meet Opal." She announced handing the baby to her sister. Spencer took Opal into her arms lovingly, gazing at the gorgeous infant in her arms. She may not be able to stand her sister at times, but Melissa did produce beautiful little girls.

"Hi baby. I'm auntie Spence as your sister calls me. You're beautiful sweetie. Absolutely gorgeous." She cooed to the infant. However, Opal didn't react to the sound of her voice as most babies did. Spencer's thought process stirred on the weird behavior of the child for a moment before looking up to her sister with wide eyes. "Mel? She's deaf isn't she?" She asked carefully.

"Yeah Spencer. She's deaf."

"Why? What happened?"

"It runs in our family Spence. For some reason she just ended up with it."

"What? How could it run in our family if none of our relatives have ever been deaf?"

"Spencer. Don't get so upset over it. Its not good for you or for the baby." Toby said cautiously.

"Spencer dear, don't you remember? Alyssa was deaf. So was your aunt Meredith." Spencer's father said. Making her gasp quietly. She had never once heard him mention her older sister Alyssa in such a calm manner. Alyssa was older than her by about 13 years. Spencer didn't remember much of her because she had died while Spencer was very young. Melissa became upset over it much easier than her Mother or Father, however Spencer didn't really get upset at all.

"And Grandpa Morris." Melissa added. Cradling Opal in her arms.

"Oh." Was all Spencer could manage out of her own mouth.


The next day Spencer found her self getting ready for her appointment, she was frantically searching through her closet for something decent to wear. Her belly was quite prominent now, Spencer being 3 months along. She settled on a plain white, V-neck t-shirt and a pair of leggings. She pulled on her tall, bailey button UGG boots and threw on a blue cardigan. She pulled her hair up into a bun and went downstairs to join Toby at the table.

"So, Spence, I've been thinking about the baby." Toby stated as they sat at the table silently. Spencer eying his coffee.

"And?"

"We need to come up with a name for her. I don't want to continue to call her the baby."

"Toby, I need you to know that I do not want to keep this child. I hope you understand, but whether you do or not, its what's best for her, and for me."

"We still need a name. I'm not just giving her up. I want an open adoption, if I'm going to go through with the adoption at all."

Spencer sighed. Seeing that giving his daughter away was shattering Toby's heart.

"When I saw Melissa yesterday." She paused, not sure of how she wanted to place her words. "I thought for a few moments that we could have that in a few short months Toby. I want that. I truly do. But we just cant have that right now Tobes. We have to do what's best for her, whether its bearable for us or not. I don't want an open adoption. I don't think it would benefit her. I think we should stay out of it Toby. Leave her alone, because she doesn't need 4 parents. She needs 2, adult parents. We aren't adults yet Toby. We're not ready for her." Toby looked at her when she finished. Tears flooding his eyes.

"I know Spence. But, she's my baby. Do you not realize that you two are everything to me? I already almost lost you, I don't want to give her up. I don't think I can."

"We may have to Tobes."

Toby gathered her into his arms and cried into her shoulder. Letting her know how hard the last three months had been for him as well as her.

"Caitlen."

"What?"

"I like the name Caitlen." Spencer said.

"Her parents could call her Kate." Toby replied, a small, weak smile on his lips.

"Caitlen Mae."

"That's perfect Spence."

Spencer smiled and tugged him into her grip tighter. They stayed like that for a while before she opened her mouth again.

"Toby?"

"Yeah Spence?"

"Do you think she's going to be deaf?"

"I don't know Spence. I don't know. But whatever she's like," Toby paused, placing a hand on Spencer's engorged belly, "I'll love her no matter what."


There is no excuse for this chapter. I am so sorry I'm late on returning from hiatus you guys. I honestly did have intentions of coming back earlier than this, but the 18th is the day after my brothers birthday and it was kind of hectic, not to mention that I am training my horse on my own now. I also had major writers block. I actually like the way this came out though, so I hope you do too. Thanks loves! -N