Chapter Four- Texas, Arizona, and New Mexico

"Hut, HIKE!" I shouted and held the ball while Texas took off. "Go long!" I called and threw the football. Texas was about to catch it when Arizona tackled him to the ground.

"Oh!" Arizona shouted when he got up. "In your face!"

Texas frowned at Arizona as he rose from the ground. "Shut yer trap. Before I shut it fer 'ya." He growled and dusted dirt off of his already dirty jeans.

Arizona stuck his toung out at Texas. "'Ya sure, buddy. If you can catch me." Arizona laughed.

New Mexico stood quietly beside me. I shook my head and laughed. "That's big talk Peter," I called to Arizona. "Especially since Kevin's bigger than you."

Arizona frowned at me. "Thanks so much for the support, Dad." he said flatly.

Texas shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Well, let's just go back home. My back hurts 'cause someone tackled me. When we were playing flag football." he growled and glared at Arizona.

Arizona held his hands up. "Hey, man! How was I supposed to know what those flags were for?" he exclaimed.

New Mexico sighed in exasperation. "You guys are estúpido." He said in an annoyed voice.

Arizona glanced at New Mexico and grins. "It speaks!"

"Whatever," New Mexico spat. "I need to get going. My boss is going horseback riding and for some reason, he wants me to come with."

I rolled my eyes. "Well all right, bukaroo. Get goin'." Texas said and jutted his thumb toward New Mexico's crappy car. New Mexico sneered at Texas, but walked away.

"All right, I'm ready to go home and take a nice long nap, what about you, Taxi?" Arizona asked and stretched.

"First of all, don' ever call me Taxi 'gain. Got it? Second of all, I agree with 'th runt." Texas said.

"Runt?" Arizona repeated and frowned at Texas. "Just 'cause I'm smaller than you doesn't mea-"

"Okay! Let's go home and take a nap!" I said loudly, when Arizona and Texas get into a fight, it lasts forever. Arizona glared at Texas one more time, then followed me to the car, with Texas at his heels.
-

"Hey, Kevin!" I called from the kitchen.

"Yeah Dad?" he called back.

"Come in the kitchen, will 'ya? It's your turn to make breakfast!"

"Yeah!" New Hampshire added. "Hurry up, I'm gettin' hungry!"

Texas stomped into the kitchen moments later, with bed head, still in his boxers, and his un-shaved face. "Put some damn pants on, for Pete's sake!" Colorado called.

"Shut it, Mountain Boy!" Texas growled at Colorado.

"Mountain Boy? Me? Wanna come over here and say that to my face?" Colorado challenged.

"Maybe I will!" Texas snarled.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Washington shouted. "Texas, calm your tits bro. What're you on, your man period or something? And Colorado, stop provoking Texas, everyone knows he can kick your ass if he wanted to."

Evryone murmmered in agreement. Colorado and Texas's faces turned bright red. They just scowled at each other on more time, then Colorado turned back to talk with Florida again. "Well, what Jessica said was kinda disturbing. But it worked!" I chriped. "Now, get crackin' on breakfast Kevin."

Texas sighed and walked over to the stove. "What do you want me to make?" he asked flatly.

"Pancakes!" New York shouted.

"Bacon!" Wisconsin and Minnesota added. Then they frowned at each other.

"Eggs!" Californa shouted halfheartedly while he flipped through a magazine.

"Okay, so basically a normal all 'Merican breakfast." Texas said.

Everyone nodded and I heard some, "Well duh"s. Texas started to get all of the supplies to feed fifty one people. So I turned to talk to Delaware. "How was your date with that one girl yesterday, Charlie? What was her name? Jennifer? Ginny?" I asked Delaware.

"Her name was Tiffany, Dad." Delaware sighed in exasperation. "It was all right. She was a real air head though. And she kept staring at me, it was kind of uncomfortable."

"Charile, every girl stares at you. We've established this." I said.

"Not every girl, Dad. That's being a little blunt." Delaware stated.

"Yahu." I protested. "You can't even go outside without being attacked by girls. That's why you're so pale!" I took one of his hands and waved it around. "You're like a vampire!"

Delaware snatched his hand away. "I am not pale!" he protested.

I held my hands up. "All right Deli! Whatever you say!"

Hour Later...

"Breakfast's done!" Texas said suddenly.

"Finally!" New Jersey shouted and lept up from his seat. He rushed over to Texas and held out his plate.

"Dish it yourself, Jersey." He growled and walked away.

New Jersey frowned at him. "Aren't you gonna eat?" His reply was a slamming door.

"Jeez." Georgia frowned. "What's his problem?" he asked and walked to the food to get some breakfast.

"Like I said," Washington. "he's on his man period."

"He's just bummed because his girlfriend dumped him." Arizona slurred and walked over to the food.

"Texas had a girlfriend? Like, a real girl?" Montanna asked and frowned. "No offense to Texas. But who would date him?"

"That's what I was thinkin'!" Alabama agreed and shoved some eggs in his mouth.

"Guys, guys. Don't be so mean!" I said as I sat down with my glorious breakfast. "You know we all talk that way about Allison behind her back." I said as I devoured my bacon.

Californa frowned at me. "Dude, you totally killed the mood. Why'd you have to like, go and tell her that?" he asked and bit into his pancake.

"Give me the damn syrup!" someone suddeny yelled.

"Not done with it yet!" Someone else yelled back. Oh great, Minnesota's hogging the syrup again.

"Dude, how much syrup do you need?" Maine asked her brother.

"Lots, plus, Dad finally got the real stuff instead of that crappy store brand." Minnesota said through a mouthfull of pancake.

"You're going to get diabetes." New York said flatly.

"Oh yeah?" Minnesota growled after he finished his pancake. "I don't have to lower my pop sizes becuase of obesity." he shot back and stabbed his pancake with his fork in an effort to pick it up.

"Don't talk about that." New York said quickly.

"Sure, that's what I thought." Minnesota said smugly.

"Just finish your damn breakfast and quit bickering." I said and frowned. I wanted to enjoy my breakfast without 49 brats whining.
-

"Hey! Frank!" I called to New Mexico and knocked on his door.

New Mexico opened the door reluctently. "¿Sí?" he asked.

"Wanna come play baseball with me?" I asked and put on a big grin.

"Umm, I kind of have some work to do, papá. Maybe later." New Mexico replied and tried to shut the door. I put my hand on the door and forced it open.

"What kinda work? Paperwork?" I asked and waltzed into his room.

"." New Mexico replied, slightly annoyed. "My boss says to have it done by tomorrow afternoon. So, I would like to have it finished by her deadline."

"Come on, it's not even that much!" I exclaimed. "You can leave for an hour or two! And I promise, as soon as we're done, I'll bring you right back home so you can finish your paperwork." I gave him my puppy-dog face.

New Mexico sighed. "Fine," He said reluctently. "I'll go play baseball with you. But who else is going?"

"Ummm. Kevin, Jenna, Billy, Hal, Max, Ashley, me, and you." I replied as I counted the people with my fingers. New Mexico seemed to try and think up another excuse not to go along and play baseball with us, but he gave up and told me to get out. I frowned. "Why?"

"I'm not going to play baseball is a suit." New Mexico said flatly, as if it was obvious.

"Then, don't wear suits as casual wear." I stated, instead of a reply, he shut the door in my face.
~~~

"Why is Minnesota here?" Wisconsin asked and jerked his thumb toward his younger brother.

"Because he wanted to come along." I said and hefted my bat.

"Yeah, so? He sucks! With a capital S!" Wisconsin said loudly, loud enough for Minnesota to hear. Minnesota just glared at Wisconsin and stalked up to us.

"Okay," he said in his Canadian-American accent. "We gotta pick teams, right? So who's gonna be the captains?" he asked and scowled at Wisconsin. He clearly did not want Wisconsin to be one of the captains.

"Oh, I almost forgot about that!" I exclaimed awkwardly. "Uh, how about Kevin and me? That would work!"

"Sure," They both dismissed and continued to glare at each other.

"Alright everyone!" I called. "Time to pick the teams! Me and Kevin are gonna be captains." I saw Texas smirk at Florida, who looked like she was going to punch Texas in the face.

Texas and I stood side-by-side while the other states stood in a circle, waiting to be picked. "Ok, Kevin. You can pick first." I offered and gestured toward the waiting states.

Kevin looked thoughtfull for a moment then finally said. "Florida." he said and pointed to the girl.

Florida just frowned and stepped beside Texas. "I pick...Frank!" I said and pointed at New Mexico. He nodded and stood beside me. Texas and florida whispered back and forth for a minute or two.

"Come on guys," Montanna yawned. "We don't have all day." she tapped her wrist. "I have a meeting with my boss and capital at 5:00. So let's make this snappy."

"Shut it Montanna." Texas snapped, then went back to whispering. When they finally made their decision, Florida pointed to Wisconsin. "Hey, Cheesehead, get over here," Texas said and motioned for Wisconsin to come over. Wisconsin smuggly grinned at Minnesota, who looked like he was going to strangle him.

"Hal," I said. Minnesota confidently strode up to my team and stood there defiently.

"Massachusetts."

"Ashley."

"Okay, now that we got all our teams established, who's gonna bat first?"Texas asked. "Anyone got a coin?"

"Nah. My team'll go first." I said and motioned for my team to follow me. Texas narrowed his eyes at me.

"Why do you guys get to go first?" he asked.

"Because, we're better. And I, who fathered all of you. Always goes first." I said and walked to home plate and hefted my bat. I stood there and watched the states fight and bicker about who gets which place. Wisconsin wanted to pitch but Florida was already pitcher, now they're fighting over the position. I yawned and leaned on my bat. "Anyday now!" I said casually and smiled at them. Wisconsin and Florida's heads both snapped toward me and glared at me.

"Stay outta this, Dad!" Wisconsin growled.

"Yeah!" Florida agreed.

I rolled my eyes. If this continued, this argument could last for years. "Come on!" Massachusetts growled from first base. "quit your arguing! Wisconsin! Get your ass back to third base!" Wisconsin glared daggers at Massachusettes, but stalked back to third base.

"Finally!" I exclaimed and got into my hitting position. Florida narrowed her eyes, wound up her arm, then threw a fast ball. I swung and it hit the ball square on. making it soar over into the outfield. "Homerun!" I grinned and jogged around the bases. Texas dashed off to get the ball while I jogged along.

I finally made it to home just as Texas was getting back with the ball. "Hal! You're up!" I called to the Minnesotan.

He nodded and took the bat from me. "EASY OUT!" Wisconsin called.

"I hope the ball hits your face!" Minnesota called.

"Hey, you two!" New Mexico warned.

Minnesota and Wisconsin ignored him. Minnesota got into a batting stance and Florida wound up her arm and threw a curve ball. Minnesota hit it, and it did hit Wisconsin-in the face. "Oops." he said. He didn't look the least bit sorry.

I frowned. "Um, game postponed?" I suggested and walked over to the now knocked out Wisconsin.

"Sure," Everyone said and shrugged.
-

Arizona grinned in my face. I frowned at him. "What the fuck do you want? It's four in the morning." I grumbled and blinked.

"It's Christmas morning, Dad! Think of the presents!" He exclaimed.

"We're the only ones awake, there are no presents." I frowned. "Now let me go back to sleep before I knock you out."

"Hey, where's the Christmas spirit, Pops? Plus, Minnesota's awake. He's drinking coffee!" Arizona pointed out.

"Hal gets up at four in the morining all the time. He likes to watch the sun rise and all that junk. Now let me go back to sleep until ten or so. If you're to awake to go back to sleep go drink coffee with Hal or watch TV or something." I grumbled and pulled a pillow over my head.
~~~

At a reasonable time to wake up in the morning...

I yawned and stretched my arms. I glanced at my digital clock, it read: 10 AM. Great time to wake up in the morning. I got up and put on a shirt and sweatpants. I exited my room to go down to the kitchen to have my cup of coffee.

Arizona was contently sipping some coffee and chatting with New Mexico. "So how's Santa Fe? Good?" Arizona asked contently.

"Uhh, she's fine. How's Phoenix?" New Mexico asked.

"Oh, he's great! He's back in the homeland covering for me in a meeting, but he'll be here when we have the party." Arizona replied and took another sip of his coffee.

"Oh, Dad, you're up!" Minnesota said and smiled at me. "Merry Christmas!"

"Yeah, you too, Halvar." I grinned at Minnesota's full name. It was Norway's idea to name Minnesota that. Minneapolis snickered. "Your real name is Halvard, Dad?" she snickered.

"Yes, Hanna. Before I named you Hanna. I thought about naming you Helga." Minnesota joked.

Minneapolis shuddered. "That sounds like a fat old lady's name." she said.

"Yeah. So Dad, want a cup?" Minnesota asked and held up the fresh pot of coffee he just made.

I nodded. "Extra cream and sugar." I reminded him.

"Yeah yeah." he said and rolled his eyes.
~~~

Soon everyone arrived for the Christmas party, we were just waiting on one person. Canada. My brother was always late to my Christmas parties. New York just wanted to open presents without him since evryone else was here, but I insisted on waiting for him. I stared at the door and willed Canada to walk through it. Just then, he opened the door and smiled lightly. "Hi, Sorry I'm late. The Provinces are getting the gifts." he said quietly.

"Don't worry 'bout it, Mattie!" I exclaimed and got up. "I'm just glad you can make it! There's a terrible storm out there!"

Canada smiled back. "Glad I could make it. Got any coffee, eh? It's cold out there." he said and walked into the kitchen.

"Yeah, help yourself!" I said.

Just then, The Canadian Provinces burst through the door with armfulls of presents. "Merry Christmas." They greeted.

"Where should we set these?" Ontario asked and hefted the presents in his arms.

Albany pointed toward the Christmas Tree. "The Christmas tree." he said.

"Thanks." Yukon said and dropped the presents under the tree. "Those things were getting heavy."

"I bet." Colorado said. "Look at all of 'em! You guys didn't have to get presents for all of us. You couldda left out Texas."

Texas just frowned at Colorado. "Is it okay if I smoke in here?" Quebec asked me.

"Nah. Go ahead."

"Thanks." He said as he pulled a cigarette out and lit it up.

"Okay! Present time!" New York said and grabbed a random present. He looked at the tag. "Ummm...Wisconsin. Here's a gift for 'ya."
~~~

"Thanks for all the presents and stuff guys!" Canada said and smiled.

"The least we could do." I said and slung an arm around my brother's shoulders. "Hope we all enjoyed ourselves."

Canada nodded. "Of course."

"What now?" Washington asked.

I grinned. "Let's get wasted!"

Wisconsin liked that idea.

Canada laughed. "Not really a good idea, Al."

"Ah, well. Merry Christmas everybody."


AN:

OMFG THIS CHAPTER SUCKS.

I couldn't figure out what states to write about next so I took Katesmak's request into consideration. So, Arizona, New Mexico, and texas happened.

For NotRenn:

Thanks for the review. 0.0

Delaware: Oh! Um...Thank you?

Happy Belated Holidays everyone. :)

Review and favorite please!