Daphne

My phone vibrated. When I looked at it, it was my sister Maddie's face. I hit accept. "Hey, Maddie!"

"Hey, Daphne. How are you?"

"I'm great. Where are you?"

"I'm in…." She dragged it out while she thought. "St. Louis. Yeah, St. Louis." She sighed. "And Jake's in Chicago. But the good news is, his tour's almost over, so he'll hook up with me in…somewhere." She giggled.

"How can you stand it, being away from him, when you're a newlywed?"

"It sucks. It really sucks. That's something Mom didn't really tell me." She paused. "Do you think she missed Dad like I miss Jake?"

I thought about that. "Maybe." The thought crossed my mind that Deacon was with her then, that whenever she was away from us, Deacon was there. I loved Deacon, still love Deacon, but that was my dad Mom left behind. So complicated.

"Well, anyway," Maddie said, interrupting my thoughts, "I got the link to the wedding pictures today, so I'm going to send it to you. I think they turned out really well. You look beautiful, by the way."

"Well, duh." I smiled. Since I was her only bridesmaid, I got to pick out my dress, so I did pick out something that was flattering. "I can't wait to see them."

"I'll have to decide which ones I want for an album, but you can pick out ones you like and order them too." She laughed. "There's a great one in there of Sadie."

"When she was all messy, after she'd been picking flowers?" I smiled as I thought of how she'd run in the room, a complete mess, and gone straight for Mom, grubby hands and all. Poor Deacon. He couldn't keep up with her.

"No, it was after that. But we're all in the brides' room before the ceremony and I guess the photographer just snapped a candid shot. The only one looking at the camera was Sadie, though. And she was definitely yucking it up."

"I can't wait to see it."


It turned out to be one of the highlights of all the pictures. It really was a nice shot and it sure showed off our baby sister in character. Looking at her, I wanted to run find her and kiss her all over her precious goofy little face. I hadn't really expected it, but Sadie was the one that pulled me out of my funk and brought me back into this family.

I remember when Mom told Maddie and me that she was pregnant. It was sort of a kick in the gut for me. I'd kept quiet for a long time about how I was feeling about everything, but finding out that Mom and Deacon were having another baby together really made me feel like I was on the outside looking in. Even Maddie couldn't make me feel better, and she sure did try.

I was ten when my parents got divorced. It had been an awful time. I remember when they told us they were splitting up. I was so surprised, but Maddie wasn't. She wouldn't tell me why, but not too long ago Dad told me that it was because of Peggy. Maddie and I stayed living in our house and Mom and Dad alternated weeks with us. It was sort of weird, but okay. But then Mom and Deacon were in that accident and Mom was in the hospital and almost died. That was probably the scariest thing I've ever been through. Dad moved back in with us when Mom was in the hospital and stayed after she got home, so I was hoping they would get back together. But I heard Mom tell Dad one night that he needed to leave and that made me realize it was really over.

Maddie had found out by then that Deacon was really her dad, which was pretty confusing at first. Plus she was kind of a brat to everyone, including me. So much drama! When she posted her video online and called herself Maddie Claybourne, I thought she'd get in a lot more trouble than she did and, to tell the truth, I was a little annoyed that she didn't. Back then it felt like the whole world revolved around Maddie and I got kind of lost in the shuffle.

I sort of thought that things would settle down when Mom finally decided to marry Deacon. She had been dating Luke Wheeler, who I thought at first was really cool. But I don't think he really loved Mom the way Deacon does and he asked her to marry him without even talking to Maddie and me about it. I still think that was wrong. He asked her in front of us and it was awful. I remember Dad holding me until I fell asleep that night because I couldn't stop crying. Maddie and I were both happy when Mom broke up with Luke.

When she and Deacon got married, though, Mom said something about Deacon being the love of her life and the person she'd always dreamed of being with and it really made me feel kind of bad. Did she not ever love Dad? Was Maddie her favorite because she was Deacon's daughter? I was really confused and I didn't know how to ask her about it, so I didn't.


Maddie and I still spent every other week with Dad. I think there were times when Maddie would have liked to spend less time there. I kind of understood that. I mean, Deacon and Mom were her real parents, so it was natural that she'd want to be a part of that little family unit. But selfishly I was glad that she didn't. I think she did it for our Dad, because he would have been hurt if she'd stopped coming over. But it meant that we were together and I just felt like I needed her more. Her and Dad.

When Mom got pregnant, Maddie seemed more willing to spend the whole week at Dad's. She told me that it felt awkward, watching how Deacon was so into Mom's pregnancy, knowing it was so different from her experience. Most of the time, I think Maddie loved Dad and Deacon pretty much the same, just differently. But while Mom was pregnant, I think it made Maddie sad. And it made her cling to Dad a little more because, after all, he was there all that time.

It wasn't just awkward for Maddie though. I'd see Deacon rub Mom's belly or talk to it and it just felt so weird. I kept thinking about Mom loving Deacon the whole time she was married to Dad, even while she was pregnant with me, I guess. I wondered if Dad had known that and it made me sad for him and I think I felt a little more protective of him.

After a while, I was really feeling left out. Deacon was spending a lot more time with Maddie and he was so focused on Mom and the baby. I asked Dad to take me out to dinner one night and that's when I told him I wanted to move in with him.

"Daphne, you know I'd love to have you live with me," he'd said, "but your mom would have to agree and I'm just not sure she would. Especially with the baby coming and all."

"But that's why I want to," I said, pouting. "With the new baby, there's no room for me. It's Mom and Deacon and Maddie and the new baby. They're the family. They all belong to each other. I'm not one of them."

Dad had smiled, trying to cheer me up. "Of course you're part of them. Mom is your mom and Maddie's your sister. And, uh, Deacon loves you too."

"Dad, please. I need some space. And I want to be with you."

In the end, he'd agreed to support me. Mom, of course, said no right away and when she realized I wasn't going to let it go, she cried. Maddie did too, and that almost swayed me. But it turned out to be Deacon that really understood. He told me that they would miss me and wished I would stay, but if that was what I wanted to do, he'd get Mom to agree. And he did. He even got her to agree that I would only come back every other weekend. It was tough watching how hard she cried when Dad came to get me. She hugged me so tight and she got my hair wet with all her crying. I got a lump in my throat and my chest hurt as I watched in the side mirror as Dad drove off. Deacon had his arms around Mom and she was sobbing, I could tell.

When I went back on weekends, Mom was always so bubbly and over-the-top. I knew she was trying so hard and it was tough not to just give in and stay. She always cried when Dad came to get me and it would always take me a day or so to get over that pain. I hated hurting her, because I loved her so much, but it was good being with Dad, and away from all the focus on the baby.


The day Sadie was born was a miserably hot early August day. Dad and I were at the Frothy Monkey and I was having an iced cappuccino. School would be starting soon, so it was nice to be able to be lazy. Dad was in campaign mode since he was running for the Senate, but he had taken the afternoon off to spend with me.

"What's on the agenda for the weekend?" he asked.

It was my weekend to spend at Mom's. Now that it was getting closer to when the baby would be born, I was even less enthusiastic about going over. Every time I was there, seeing Mom so pregnant and working on baby things, had torn my heart up a little more. She and Deacon were ridiculously moony over each other and all that did was make me sad for Dad and wonder about my own place. So I rolled my eyes. "I'm sure we'll talk about the baby and Mom will want to show me all the stuff she's gotten, and I'll have to listen to her complain about being fat or hot, or fat and hot."

Dad gave me a look and a small smile. "Daphne, remember what I told you," he said. "She was the same way with you and Maddie. She's just excited and happy."

"Whatever."

"Daphne, this baby is going to be your sister too."

"Half-sister," I reminded him.

He shook his head. "I think you'll change your mind. You don't think of Maddie that way."

I shrugged and sipped on my drink. Just then my phone buzzed. I looked at it. Mom. I almost let it go to voice mail, but I answered. "Hey, Mom," I said, with a sigh.

"Daphne!" Mom cried, sounding a little odd and breathless. I waited. I could hear her breathe out slowly. "Daphne," she said again, her voice more normal. "We're on our way to the hospital."

I frowned. "Why? What happened?"

She laughed. "The baby's coming," she said.

"What? But I thought it was a few more weeks."

"She's like you. She wants to come early. So, can your dad bring you to meet us at the hospital?" She paused. "Do you want to come?" Her voice sounded sad for a second.

I felt a pit in my stomach and my heart hurt. "Of course I want to come," I said. I heard her make a noise like she was choking back tears. "We'll come now." I could hear Deacon asking her in a panicky voice if she was okay and that made me feel panicky. I didn't realize she could be in pain, for some reason.

I heard Deacon ask for the phone and, after a moment, Mom said no. "I'm sorry, Daphne, I'm back," she said. "You can meet Maddie in the waiting room." She laughed again. "It won't be long now, so you won't have to wait long. I love you, baby girl. I can't wait to see you." And she hung up.

I stood up and so did Dad. "She's going to the hospital." I took a breath. "She sounded like she was in pain."

Dad nodded. "She's probably having contractions. And she told me, in no uncertain terms, that they were very painful. So, yeah." He smiled. "She's in pain. Let's go then."


It was maybe thirty minutes after we got there that a nurse came out and said we could go in. Maddie and I hurried down the hall, Dad following us.

When we went in the room, we could see Mom holding the baby and Deacon hovering next to her. Mom was all sweaty, with her hair pulled back in a ponytail, and her face was kind of flushed, but when she looked up and saw us, she smiled. She looked so happy. "Come see your baby sister," she said. Maddie and I walked over and stood on either side of her, Deacon putting his arm around Maddie. Mom put the baby on her legs, so we could both see her. She was so tiny, with little tufts of dark hair and a little bowtie mouth. "Maddie and Daphne, meet Sadie Faith," she said proudly. "Your absolutely perfect baby sister."

Sadie opened her eyes just then and yawned, stretching her little hands and arms above her head. She looked up at me first and then Maddie. I fell in love with my sister at that very moment. And I knew right then I wanted nothing more than to be with her every day.


I moved back home the next day and was waiting with Maddie and Aunt Tandy when Deacon brought Mom and Sadie home from the hospital. Two arms around me, heaven to ground me, and a family that always calls me home.