"Hey, don't let me forget to go to the pet isle, I wanna get something for Snixx. Like a teaser or a laser pointer or something." Rachel nodded that she would as she grabbed a grocery cart.

"I can't wait to meet this little kitty that managed to steal San's heart" Quinn said with friendly but teasing tone of voice. The Jewish girl pulled up an empty home page on her phone and showed Quinn the picture she had as her wallpaper that was of Santana and Snixx cuddled together.

"Well this is an overload of adorable. She obviously has you wrapped around her paw. What's with the black cat and stuffed panther Snixx thing though?"

"Oh, well, when we were children, I used to call Santana my panther because she protected me from bullies and other ill-intended fellow students. It stuck with me. So when I saw that cute little kitten I knew immediately what I would name her." They were walking through the produce area, Quinn grabbing peaches and a watermelon while Rachel grabbed a few containers of strawberries, the mushrooms she needed for her sandwich, and some broccoli slaw mix.

"Well, then what cat am I?"

"Lion." Both brunettes answered simultaneously.

"It would be even more legit if you cut your hair up to here. You have massive bed head in the morning. It would look like a mane." Santana said, indicating just above her shoulders.

"Seriously you think I should cut it? Rachel?"

"I think it would make you even more beautiful, Quinn. Lets go grab some poor pig's ribs, head to the pet isle, then we can get going. I would really like to put on some less revealing clothes.

"Rae, you have a hoodie on, it's not revealing. Plus it's pink, you should love it." Santana gently tugged on the sleeve of the hoodie that had the words 'Property of Quinn Fabray' on the back.

"You know I meant the shorts. They're like...like underwear. I feel ridiculously exposed. I can admit that I do like showcasing my legs with my skirts but this is too much. If one more old man leers at me I'll make the both of you shop alone." She said, huffing as they turned towards the butcher's counter and one of the boys working there who thought they couldn't hear him whispered out a quick 'Jesus Christ she's hot'. Quinn and Santana giggled a little from both sides of her, fist bumping behind her back.

"I think you look great, Bear."

"Agreed. But if you're uncomfortable, there's an h&m three or four minutes away from here. I'll buy you a pair of jeans." Rachel stopped and looked over at her, the look in her eyes soft and trusting.

"Really?"

"Yes Rachel, really." Quinn found her arms full of tiny adorable diva not a second later. She looked over at Santana who motioned for her to hug back, so she closed her arms around the much smaller girl and hugged her tight, relaxing into it. God, that felt...good. Really, scary, good. When Rachel finally pulled away to go back to the basket after grinning at her and then walked over to the butcher counter, her nose scrunched up in distaste at the display of slaughtered animal, Quinn locked eyes with the Latina next to her, knowing how lost she felt was clear and easy to see in her eyes.

"Felt good right? Don't worry babe, just get used to it. It's how things are with Rae. It feels good for a long while. And then it just feels like home. It's frightening, really. She says it feels that way for her too. Come on, we better go get her before she starts lecturing the butcher on how immoral his profession is." Santana reached for her hand, palm up, and the blonde weaved their finger together before leaning over to press a tentative kiss on her her best friend's cheek. The grin she got in return made her feel a little giddy inside, and it stayed on her face until they closed in on the butcher counter and heard Rachel arguing with a man who was literally twice her size and probably thrice her age.

"No. What I don't understand is how can you claim to be an experienced butcher and not be able to tell me how the pig this bacon came from was raised. It's very simple. Free range, pasture? Or was it perhaps forested? You know what, Mr. Umbridge, since you have so little information on your own wares I'll simply call Arcadian Acres myself. Have a good day!" Eyes wide as they followed after the girl who'd just argued with a butcher over a food she didn't even eat. They could see another butcher paper wrapped package already in the basket, so at least she got the ribs.

"Rachel what happened? Why were you arguing about bacon of all things?" The shorter brunette dropped said product into the cart and started pushing forward again before she spoke.

"I know that the red wattle pigs this particular farm breeds are raised in a pasture but when I asked him about the ribs as well he didn't know and I got frustrated. This is supposed to be a different kind of shopping environment. I mean, if you're going to eat poor dead animals at least be educated about what you are selling or eating. Anyway, I'm sorry. I know that was probably...I don't want to embarrass the two of you. I know it's more likely than not embarrassing to be seen with me at all." Quinn placed her free hand on the basket stopping Rachel from pushing it any further.

"Stop. Don't say that...and please don't think it. It isn't true Rachel. We're proud to be seen with you if anything. Not the other way around, alright?"

"Seriously Rae. Truth be told everyone else here should be embarrassed they aren't with you. That's how we feel, kay?" Rachel bit into her lip and nodded shyly at both of them. Then turned back to the grocery cart to start to leading them toward them towards the pet isle.

"We know it's our fault you even feel this way, and I know we both wish that there were some magical apologetic words which could turn off that insecurity that we instilled inside of you, but there aren't. So...for as long as you need us to, Rachel, we'll tell you that you are more important than our reputations. And there isn't a single thing wrong with you, okay?" Rachel's looked at her like she'd set the stars in the sky and launched into her arms, hugging her even tighter than before.

"You're the best, Quinn. You too, Tana." Santana pulled her into a quick, tight hug before letting her go back to the grocery cart.

"And please turn off the bambi eyes. You're killing me. I mean jesus christ girl. You're giving me diabetes here. Let's go get Snixx a toy or three."

()

"I feel like I'm going to litterally burst. Like a sausage. An over-stuffed sausage. How could you let me eat so much, Rach?" Quinn pouted, tapping the shorter girl in the leg from her inner tube.

"Don't blame her. You need to get a hold of that smoked pork addiction you have, babe. It's getting ridiculous. You ate just as much as Leroy did." At that exact moment, Rachel's taller father stuck his head around the door frame, narrowing his eyes at the Latina.

"Are you saying I'm getting fat, Santi?"

"Of course not, L. You look even more buff than when I met you ten years ago." He nodded, grinning.

"That's what I thought. These muscles need protein girl! Love you."

"Love you too, L." The man disappeared again, leaving Santana giggling from where she was floating on her own intertube.

"I can't believe you guys have known each other for ten years. But if you stopped being friends in sixth grade, that means...Rachel you haven't met Eddie?" Rachel, who was sitting on the poolside nearest both girls eating a plate literally full of sliced watermelon, shook her head.

"I haven't. I've seen him a few times around town with either Maribel, Santana, or both. But I haven't met him officially. He's so cute though. I would love to meet him. He looks exactly like I thought he would."

She looked down and swished her feet through the water a bit, frowning to herself as she picked up and ate another piece of watermelon. When they were kids, after Santana's father had left her mother and she had yet to learn anything about Shelby, Maribel Lopez had been the closest thing she had to a mother. She remembered sometimes being held by her and crying into her shoulder, the occasional 'mami' that would slip past her lips and the more prominent 'mija' Maribel would let out. She knows the same thing sometimes happened with Santana and her fathers too. The jewish girl looked back up and locked eyes with Santana, who seemed to realize what she was thinking of pretty quickly.

Rachel remembered Shelby rejecting her, how she'd wanted to run back into the arms of her Mami and not the woman who was supposed to be her actual mother but didn't want her. But Santana had made it impossible to do that three years before the incident with Rachel's birth mother occured, so she'd just went home and cried in her room until she was dehydrated and sick. She'd been doubly heartbroken.

She wondered if the older Latina ever thought about her. Because every time she wanted to talk about something that she didn't think her fathers would understand, or anything that just felt like a mother daughter conversation, she missed her. Like when she'd first gotten her period...god talking to her dads about that had been embarrassing. She felt hands on her face tilting her head back up, finally forcing her out of her thoughts, and her eyes locked with startling gold. She drew in a sharp breath, leaning back to balance with her open palms against the tile that rimmed the pool.

"Hey...there you are. Look at me, are you okay, Rachel?" Quinn's thumbs wiped away quite a collection of freshly fallen tears that the brunette had been completely unaware of. She knew it was an inappropriate time to think it, but Quinn was even more beautiful up close.

"I'm okay." Is what she said instead of giving the blonde in front of her the compliments she surely deserved to hear.

"You sure? We were worried. We tried talking to you, you were't answering. You were so far in your head...where did you go?" Those thumbs softly stroked her dry cheeks again, Quinn seeminly not worried about putting any distance between them.

"Just thinking about the past. That's all...I'm fine. Sorry for making you worry." The blonde nodded, climbing up one more step on the ladder Rachel was sitting atop to press a sincere kiss against her forehead.

"As long as you're okay. You had us both worried. San went to get you a bottle of water. She should be back by now, but maybe she's taking to Hiram and Leroy. Matter of fact, go ahead and scoot back and stand up so I can climb out. The pool is the worst place for day dreaming. I don't want you to drown." Rachel followed the blonde's directions, grabbing her plate and standing by the time Quinn was out, standing before her in an almost too flattering pale green bikini. She took Rachel's unoccupied hand and pulled her inside, finding the three other occupants of the house standing in the kitchen with a water bottle and a few prescription pill containers on the counter.

"No. I'm fine, dad. I don't need anything. Quinn...she pulled me out." Though both the Latina and the Blonde beside her looked lost concerning what she was talking about, Santana seemed less so. So her fathers must have explained at least a little before they came in.

Explained how thinking like she had been before sometimes got to the point where she felt like neither Santana nor her biological mother wanted her, that no one but her dads did because she had no friends.

How she'd sometimes work herself into a pretty severe depressive state. Sometimes leading to the point where she'd begin to have suicidal thoughts.

The first time she had told both her fathers and Hiram being a psychologist, had gotten her help. He didn't treat her himself, but he'd known a good, trustworthy doctor. So she had regular, daily doses, and also something to help her when she had sudden episodes such as what this could have led to.

"What are those?" The tallest of the three girls asked, her hand still linked to Rachel's.

"They're my...my meds." She nodded, squeezing gently with her fingers.

"And you need them for instances like what just happened? You getting stuck in your head like that?"

"No. Just that one in Dad's hand. And only for...for when it gets far worse than what you saw. I just don't like the way it feels for the first hour or so. It makes me feel a little loopy. But then it helps."

"Exactly baby. So please just take one for me. We can all sit here and watch a movie or you can do that with the girls. By the time the movie is over that stage will have worn off and you'll feel much better, okay?" She nodded and took the water bottle Santana handed her, swallowing the offered pill before turning to head upstairs to her room, her hand still connected to Quinn's.

"So it, it gets worse? I mean I guess you getting stuck in your head is fine really. It happens to me plenty. I over think things a lot." Rachel finally let go of the taller girl's hand and sat on her bed, leaning back against all the pillows stacked against middle of the headboard. The bed was still unmade, looking the same as when the two brunettes had rushed out of the house to go help Quinn at just before seven thirty that morning.

"Yes. It does get much worse. Sometimes I think about killing myself. It isn't all that often, but that pill is to suppress the chemical imbalance that can cause those kind of desires to turn into actionable options. Or at least that's how Doctor Peters explained it to me. In layman's terms, she said." After a few more minutes of looking around Rachel's room with blatant curiosity written all over her face, the blonde came and sat next to Rachel on the bed. She folded her legs under her and turned to face her.

"Do you feel better? Now that you've told Hiram and Leroy about how you sometimes thought about killing yourself? Do you think about it less?"

"Honestly things are much better. I hated feeling so hopeless. I pride myself on feeling like there's always a way to push forward to another day. So wanting to die was horrible. I felt weak. Telling my fathers was the best decision I've ever made." Quinn nodded, accepting the plate of fruit salad Santana handed her. She'd brought up a plate for each of them.

"But...but what if I haven't felt that way in a while. Is it still important that I tell someone? Because I mean I had some anxiety today, and that's more common, but I haven't felt like...ending things in at least two or three months." She heard the quiet gasp from the Latina, and then there were strong arms around her body and Santana had latched on to her.

"Even if it's been a few months you should definitely speak to someone about it. Like your mother or even my dad. Someone who can help you get professional help. Because the way I understand it is that even if you're fine now, if whatever triggered your thoughts was to happen again, you would go through that thought process all over again. The anxiety is typically a separate affair, but there are ways to address that as well. So you should most certainly speak with someone Quinn."

"Kay." Santana hugged her harder and pressed an urgent kiss against the side of her neck her face was buried in.

"Wish I was bigger so I could hug you both. Can't believe I could have lost my girls. Love you both." Was all she said, seeming more shaken than Quinn was at the realization that she was admitting this.

"We can figure it out, Tana." Rachel moved closer and put one arm around Quinn and the other around Santana, linking them all together.