Meet Gaston from Disney's Beauty and the Beast. He is about to get Belle's father thrown in an asylum. This will eventually cause him to fall to his death after attempting to kill the Beast in a jealous fury. This fate could have been avoided if he had a Sassy Gay Friend.
Gaston sat at a table in the darkest corner of the tavern, eagerly awaiting the keeper of the asylum. However, instead of his expected company, Sassy Gay Friend appeared opposite him from under the table, making the hunter nearly fall off his chair in surprise.
"What are you doing?" Sassy Gay Friend exclaimed. "What, what, what are you doing?"
Cue Sassy Gay Friend's theme tune as he strikes various poses
Gaston turned to him. "I've got my heart set on marrying Belle, but it turns out she needs a little…persuasion!"
"And by persuasion you mean sending her dad to the loony bin?" Sassy Gay blinked incredulously. "You're supposed to get on the good side of in-laws, not get rid of them!"
"It's all part of my ingenious plan. Belle would do anything to keep her father from being locked up, so when she finds out he's in trouble, she'll come running to me! No one comes up with ingenious plans like Gaston!"
"-And no one stoops low like Gaston!" Sassy Gay Friend cut in indignantly. "Marriage is about love, trust and smoothing over scandals! It's not about blackmail!"
At this Gaston took another swig of his beer and threw his head against the back of his chair like a drama queen. "Belle refused my proposal! I was disgraced! Rejected! Publicly humiliated!"
"Big deal it happens!" Sassy Gay Friend said matter-of-factly. "My friend from London got left at the altar. But she cleaned her house, she didn't wear the ugly wedding dress for the rest of her life, she took advantage of online dating! ."
Gaston scowled. However Sassy Gay Friend still wasn't done. "And P.S? Wait til you actually get a response from the girl before setting up the wedding in her backyard! That way you wouldn't have been stuck with a huge bill."
"I will not move on!" Gaston exclaimed angrily. Sassy Gay Friend winced at the volume and shifted away slightly. "I will have Belle for my wife, make no mistake about that! I'll have you know there's not a girl in town who hasn't fallen for me!"
Sassy Gay Friend almost hit his head on the table in frustration. "So you hit on the one girl who's not interested? You're such a guy! Why not go for someone you actually have something in common with?"
At this the hunter launched into the same spiel he had obviously bragged to his bumbling sidekick time and time again. "Belle's the most beautiful girl in town and that makes her the best! And I only deserve the best! As soon as I laid eyes on her I knew she was the girl I was going to marry!"
"Save it Edward Cullen!" Sassy Gay Friend interjected, holding up a hand to silence him. "I'm not buying any obsessive stalker stories today thank you! And you only judge based on looks! Definition = shallow!"
"Who do you think you are?" Gaston glowered fiercely. "No one talks like that to Gaston!" "
"Maybe you've got the rest of this place under your boot but it won't work on me!" Sassy Gay Friend said sternly. "You want what you can't have! Look at you life. Look at your choices. Are you even sure you want to get married yet?"
"Of course I am!" Gaston replied indignantly. "No one is sure like Gaston!"
Sassy Gay Friend raised his eyebrows. "Rrreally? You do know it takes two to make a commitment right? And divorce isn't around in this time period so once you do it, there's no going back!"
At this Gaston turned slightly pale. Sassy Gay Friend continued regardless. "You'll be stuck with that person for the rest of your life! You'll have to carry all the shopping bags and don't even get me started on the rotas for the bathroom!"
"Erm… on second thoughts I think I'll wait a bit before settling down!" Gaston said nervously. With that he strode over to the bar to chat up all three of the triplet fangirls that had been stalking him since goodness knows when.
"No one's a stupid bitch like Gaston." Sassy Gay Friend sighed to no one in particular.
End
For all the people who requested Gaston I hope you enjoyed this chapter! However, seeing as people have been requesting villains that are from the cartoons, I feel I need to make myself clear. I will only be doing villains from Disney animated movies. I'm really sorry if that means I can't do your request, but I've hardly seen any of the Disney cartoons and the animated movie brand is what I feel makes Disney. But to everyone reading, thank you so much for your support and if you have any requests from the movies I'd be happy to try my best Until next time!
