To The Lovely And Lecture-y Lukas On Track 17,

Thank you for telling me off about my "irresponsibility" again! It's kinda funny, because I really did find myself missing that from you. Not anymore though, so you should totally stop now that we're writing regularly again. Seriously. Stop. I get it.

Doesn't mean I'm going to return the battle axe, though…

Fun Fact- Did you know that we've officially been sending letters back and forth for three whole months now? That'd be like four years if we were dogs! And yes, before you say it for me- I did look that up on Google. Anyway, that. is. so. cool. I never really thought you'd reply to my really creepy first letter (yeah...I've pretty much accepted that it was really creepy at this point), and I definitely didn't picture you replying to anything I sent your way after my first horrible pun, so I think this is a win!

Where was I going with that...oh, right. I'm really happy that you've decided I'm not a complete waste of your time, even if you say otherwise in basically every letter. Trust me- I know you secretly care about me, or else you wouldn't bother lecturing me or answering my questions in the first place. So thanks, I secretly (well, not-so secretly, in my case) care about you too.

Even if you and your brother are freaking scary at times. Mainly your brother, though.

I mean, who immediately goes to the de-limbing threats when they're called something they don't like? Still, I'm happy everything is cool with you guys now- especially those unresolved chess matches. While I'm on the topic of your brother, are you a personal injury lawyer because of what happened to the Steil Wheel (he's not here, so I'm using it :P) four years ago? If so, that's some real family-style dedication and you just got a million times more attractive to me.

I didn't think that was even possible…

Ahh. I'm very content right now. Almost too content- WAIT. (whoop, there it is…) How did I almost miss that you might be leaving me?! WHAT IS THIS?!

Please tell me you're kidding because I haven't even gotten to try your licorice cake or hear your voice or take you on "Mathias' Mega-Awesome Danish-Style Denmark Tour" or prove that the Danish flag boxers would look sexy on you and that. WILL NOT. DO! That won't do at all. All I need is confirmation that you're just being your usual condescending, sarcastic self so I can get back to being my usual enthusiastic, youthfully-handsome self…And, if you are kidding- you sir, are the essence of anus.

Well. I should close this up. Both my roommates are concerned for my emotional health because a few drops of epic Viking saltwater (totally not tears or anything) just so happened to roll down my cheeks.

They were totally tears, though,

A Really Emotionally Distressed Mathias


To The Overreacting Idiot With Major Self-Control Issues,

I'm going to take a page from your book and tell you to "chill" (I will never forget your sin). I'm not kidding about relocating being a possibility for me, but there's no need to literally cry over it. It's a possibility, that's all. And, as I so courteously pointed out in my last letter, I'm sure you'd manage to stay in touch just a creepily as you do now. Our conversations have only ever been held over letter in the first place, anyway.

I do feel that some explanation is in order since you, being the simpleton that you are, can't seem to handle accepting an intentionally vague explanation. I did, indeed, rethink my career choice after Emil's accident, mainly because it most definitely wasn't an accident. It never really is. I understood that all too well, and as a result, I've been practicing personal injury law ever since. I'd never dream of changing my entire profession, but if an offer of a better position at another firm comes along, I won't hesitate to take it.

I'm sure you'll be fine without me being your "Man On Track 17" if it does happen. Well, as fine as an idiot like you can be without outside intervention.

On a lighter note, why the hell did you feel the need to provide an alternate form of measurement for how long it's been since I stupidly decided to begin replying to your letters? And in dog years? Really? You even had to look it up, which is absolutely unbelieveable- that is, if it wasn't you I was talking about.

I also don't understand the point of notifying me of a random anniversary that holds no true value. The only true thing I'll be celebrating is the fact that I somehow managed to live this long without succumbing to the horrible thought that your "thieving fingers" slip a letter into my coat pocket every few days without me noticing.

Besides that, what is there to be happy about? You're still an overeager idiot, and I'm still the person who has to deal with it. However, since you find this to be of the greatest magnitude, I'll be sure to cut myself a huge slice of the licorice cake I baked this morning.

Hurrah.

I'll try harder to be less attractive to you,

Lukas


STORY TBC

Of course...it wouldn't be a DenNor rom-com without some Mathias tears, am I right? No? Well, at least he gets to live in this one...

(I'm looking at you, half of the DenNor fics out there)

Anyway- it's official- the next chapter will be the last for this story :( Don't worry- I'm working hard to make it a finale to end all finales! And...you never know- the rumors about a possible sequel might just be true ;)

Thank you all for your beautifully awesome reviews, favorites, and follows- they never cease to bring a stupid smile to my face! I hope you enjoyed~