Chapter Five – Build God, Then We'll Talk

Lorelei Clemens

Mustang curses and slams the payphone back into its receiver. "I hope you aren't in a hurry."

"…Why?" I already know where this is going.

"Apparently," he says, shaking his head, "Lieutenant Havoc is stuck in traffic, and it might be a while until he reaches the train station." He takes five steps forward, then swivels on his heel and takes another five steps.

I watch him pace back and forth without much interest. Eventually, a corkboard on the wall to my right catches my attention. Wanted is printed across the top in capital letters. Standing up, I walk towards the board. Various papers are nailed to it, most crooked, some overlapping.

The first one that I see reads State Alchemist Serial Killer. It's partially covered by the one above it, but I don't need the sketch to recognize Scar's wanted poster, since there's only one person murdering State Alchemists. Unless I've arrived in an alternate reality where Scar's teamed up with someone and they go around murdering State Alchemists together.

One sketch looks vaguely familiar. A balding, flustered man in a pristine military uniform, with a mustache that is more of an atrocity than his actual crime – Found in Possession of Army Funds.

The text on the poster on the top right is smudged and unreadable, but the portrait is obviously Greed, all spiky hair and shark's teeth. His smile is unnaturally wide, like he's about to dislocate his jaw like a boa constrictor and swallow you whole.

At the bottom of the corkboard is a wanted poster with no sketch, only one word. Inferno.

Through me the way is to the city dolent. Through me the way is to eternal dole. Through me –

"Clemens." Someone taps me on the arm. "Lieutenant Havoc's here."

I turn around. "Huh?"

Mustang takes a deep breath and slowly lets it out before repeating himself.

Blinking, I follow him through the mostly empty train station and out the door.

"Colonel!" Havoc's across the street, trying to light a cigarette and failing. He's leaning against the hood of a car that looks like it could fall to pieces at any second. I pray to every deity out there that this ancient pile of junk falls apart after I get out.

Once there's a break in the flow of traffic, Mustang grabs my arm like I'm a toddler and crosses the street. He glances at the cigarette, the lighter, Havoc's increasingly frustrated face. Sighing, he holds out his hand and snaps. At first, Havoc seems dumbfounded at the newly lit cigarette, but he eventually puts the lighter into his coat pocket and says, "Thanks, Colonel."

"Lieutenant, Lorelei Clemens."

Havoc smiles at me. "Jean Havoc. Nice to meet you."

Though I've been told that my smile is eerily reminiscent of the Terminator's, I smile back.

"If we're going to Shou Tucker's house, it'll be faster to walk," Mustang says, gesturing towards the street. "It's around the corner to the left." He walks off, not even looking over his shoulder.

Taking a drag of his cigarette, Havoc blows the smoke out before following him. I have to jog to keep up with him, which I'd consider embarrassing if my life wasn't a complete embarrassment already. "How'd you do it?" He asks, watching me.

It takes me a minute to realize he's talking to me. "What?"

Shrugging, Havoc says, "Kill McDougal, I mean. A trained State Alchemist and multiple officers couldn't detain him, but you killed him on your first day on the job. It doesn't make sense."

"I don't really know how I did it either. He should've killed me, not the other way around." I stare at the ground, wondering if that was the right thing to say, or if it just made him more suspicious.

He doesn't respond for a long time. "When I first killed someone, I felt the same way."

I'm about to tell him that I don't need The Talk when I look up and see we're at Tucker's house. The front yard is empty. Mustang's obviously in a rush, if he couldn't be bothered to wait two minutes for us to catch up. I walk up to the door, keeping an eye out for any large demonic dogs, and try the handle. It's unlocked. Voices are coming from somewhere inside the house.

Havoc closes the door once we're both inside. He heads down the hallway and to the right.

There's a flash of white fur in the corner of my eye, and I start to back up, but something barrels into me with the force of a freight train and knocks me to the ground. The thing rolls off me, and I push myself upwards, my back making a horrific popping noise that can't possibly be natural.

"You know that's bad, Alexander." The speaker is right in front of my face, beaming at me. She hugs the dog from hell, whose tail is wagging furiously. "What's your name?"

Gritting my teeth, I gingerly stand up. "Lorelei," I say in the happiest voice I can muster. It's not very happy. "What's yours?"

Thankfully, she doesn't notice my apathy. The girl attaches herself to my leg like some kind of cuddly radioactive leech. "My name's Nina, and this is Alexander!" I try desperately to shake her off of me. She doesn't move.

Swallowing down the urge to run out the door in blind terror, I stammer, "Uh, is your dad home?"

Nina tilts her head to the side and stares at me. "Will you play with me?"

I have no idea how to say no or what'll happen if I do. She might take it well, but she might start crying. Could I ever forgive myself if I made a kid cry within five minutes of meeting her? She's still looking at me expectantly. I take a breath, close my eyes, and nod, resigning myself to spend the next week having tea parties, playing dress up, and being tackled by giant dogs.

When I open my eyes, she's grinning up at me. "You choose!"

"Have you ever played Alchemical Girls?"

Shaking her head, Nina detaches herself from my leg. "How do you play it?" She asks, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

I think for a second. "Well, alchemical girls are girls who fight evil using alchemy. Does that make sense?" She nods. "They get their powers through their familiar, an animal they're bonded to, in exchange for getting one wish granted. Your familiar would be Alexander, and mine can be my cat, Tubbs."

Nina throws herself on top of Alexander. She seems satisfied with my explanation, even though I realized I know nothing about the magical girl genre halfway through it. "My wish is that Daddy does really well on Assessment Day and gets his job renewed. Then he won't be sad all the time, and he can play with me and Alexander again!" She pauses. "What's your wish?"

My breath hitches in my throat. I can't tell her my wish, or any of my wishes. I want to stop your dad from turning you into a monstrosity. I want to go back home and pretend all this was just a bad dream. "My wish…" I swallow. "I want to see my parents."

"Why can't you?" She doesn't understand, and I don't want to explain it to her. "If you take the train, you can see them."

I shake my head, sitting down against the wall. "Trains can't take you everywhere. My parents are somewhere no train can reach. Somewhere I can't reach." Nina sits down next to me, and Alexander flops down next to her. His slobbery head somehow ends up in my lap. I reach out a hand and pat his head a couple of times.

Footsteps echo in the hallway, and Havoc walks out. "That didn't take long," he mutters under his breath. "Clemens, you're supposed to be in the dining room." Standing up, I follow him into the dining room, where Mustang and Tucker are sitting at a table.

Nina and Alexander trail after me, even though they're probably not supposed to.

"Nina, this is an adult conversation," Tucker says. My nails dig into my hands at the sound of his voice. She walks out of the room with her head down. "Lorelei Clemens, right? Sit down."

I maneuver my way around the table and sit down across from him, next to Mustang. "I assume you've been briefed on this deal."

Tucker nods. "That's correct. You don't look like a scholar, though."

Mustang and I went over this on the train. Multiple times. "I got into university a year early." It was an elaborate cover, to make up for the fact that I'm not using a false name. "I'm studying the law of equivalent exchange."

The Colonel stands up. "You'll be paid a hundred thousand cenz per day, as well as two hundred thousand cenz as a starter."

"A million cenz?" Tucker's eyes are probably widening beneath his glasses. "Alright, I'll do it."

"Perfect," Mustang says. "Lieutenant Havoc and I will go to the bank to settle the matter of your funding. We'll be back once it's all worked out." He pushes in his chair and walks into the hallway with Havoc right behind him.

I tap my fingers against the arm of my chair. It's going to be a long week.


Griffin Friar

If I accidentally shoot myself, I'll haunt Father Cornello until he dies, and then I'll haunt his ghost.

I told him I don't know how to hold a gun, how to shoot a gun, or even where to hide a gun, and he said I'd figure it out. Great advice, dude. Those newspaper advice columns have nothing on you.

"Are you alright?" The suit of armor seems to sense the panicked rage building up inside of me. "You look like you're going to be sick." He sounds more like a preteen boy than a State Alchemist. (I'm still not sure what a State Alchemist is, because Cornello had laughed when I asked him.)

On the right side of the hallway is a set of double doors that reach the ceiling. Symbols are carved onto them, just like Cornello said. "I'm fine," I lie, pushing open the doors. Two guards holding spears nod at me when I walk past them. The two brothers and Rose follow me inside, and the doors creak shut, cutting off the room's predominant source of light.

Taking a deep breath, I pull out the gun from my jacket pocket, holding it in front of me, staring at it. It feels too light, like it's made of plastic instead of metal, but that's probably because I'm holding the magazine in my other hand. I slam the magazine into the gun, grab the slide, pull it back, and release it. Before I can change my mind, or question how I just loaded a gun when I've never even held one before today, I turn around and point it at the suit of armor.

The two guards put their spears in front of Blondie, locking him in place. Rose looks at them, at him, at the armor, at me. "Griffin, what're you doing?"

My arms are shaking. "Father Cornello said this is a chance to prove my loyalty to him." I glance down at my hands, adjust the gun slightly, and rest my finger on the trigger.

"That's not true! Father Cornello wouldn't do that!" She looks absolutely horrified.

Blondie clears his throat. "He wants you to prove your loyalty by killing two people?"

I shrug, and the movement disrupts my grip. My finger slips, and I pull the trigger before I can steady myself. The gun goes off with a deafening bang. One of the guards screams and drops his spear, crumpling to the floor and holding his leg. Blondie takes advantage of the momentary confusion by grabbing the other guard by the wrist and flipping him over his head, slamming him to the floor like he's some sort of sumo wrestler.

Footsteps echo through the room, and I look around to see Cornello step out of the shadows on an overhang above us. "Griffin, you were supposed to shoot Fullmetal, not one of my guards." He walks forward, into the light. "I command you to shoot them, now."

Rose takes a step backwards, her hands over her mouth. "Father?"

My lip curls upward in disgust as I shake my head. "If you want them dead, do it yourself." I aim the gun at his head and pull the trigger. Of course, I miss, but it's still satisfying to see him flinch before he realizes the bullet hit the wall behind him. "Get someone else to be your lapdog. I'm done." I drop the gun, and it clatters to the floor at my feet.

Grinning, Blondie stares up at him. "You're not blessed by Leto," he says, narrowing his eyes. "You're just using second-rate alchemy to trick people into following you!"

Cornello clasps his hands together like he's going to pray, and red light flashes in front of him for a few seconds before he extends them. A miniature statue sits in the palm of his hand. "Alchemy can't create something out of nothing, foolish child." He slams it onto the railing in front of him.

"It can when you have a Philosopher's Stone," says the suit of armor. "Like your ring."

This whole conversation is going over my head, but if Cornello's ring is a Stone, then Jason's most likely is too. My hand instinctively goes to the chain around my neck.

The Father waves his hand dismissively. "The ring is just a ring." He sighs, raising his cane and resting it in one hand. "But I tire of this." Another burst of red light, and the cane transforms into a machine gun.

I'm frozen in place as the gun fires round after round after round. Eventually, the gunfire stops and the dust clears. There's a wall in front of the four of us, one that wasn't there before; Blondie is leaning on it with one gloved hand. "We agree about something, then," he says, smirking.

Picking Rose up with one arm, the suit of armor runs towards the wall. Bullets ricochet off of him, and he ducks his head lower, shielding her with his metal body. Blondie claps his hands and slams them against the wall, somehow creating a door, which he slams open. I curse inwardly and follow them.

The door leads to a brightly-lit hallway, but I'm too busy keeping up with the Elrics to look around.

Behind me, I hear Cornello yelling at his followers, but I can't make out what he's saying.

A group of cultists are waiting at the end of the hall. The two in the center are dressed in black, one carrying a gun, the other a staff. One of them starts to say something, but the suit of armor barrels through them without slowing down. Three more are around the next corner. They don't stand a chance.

I recognize the side door I used earlier and push it open. Once everyone is out, Blondie claps and places his hands against the door, melding it to the wall. "We should move before they find us. This isn't a very good hiding spot." His eyes scan the rows of houses in the distance, and his face brightens. "How about the bell tower?" He points to a tall building in the middle of the city. "Al, I think I have a plan."

The suit of armor puts Rose down. "What kind of a plan, brother?"

Blondie walks towards the city, a swing in his step. "Well," he calls over his shoulder, "You know the broadcast we heard earlier today? If I sneak into Cornello's office and trick him into admitting his miracles are fake while it's on, all of his followers will hear it."

"That actually might work." I run to catch up to him. "I'm Griffin, by the way." He doesn't seem to be holding a grudge against me for pointing a gun at his brother, but I don't want to take any chances. "Sorry I pointed a gun at your brother and almost accidentally shot him," I mutter under my breath.

He turns to blink at me. "Just don't do it again, okay?" Sighing, he runs a hand through his bangs. "I'm Edward Elric. My brother's Alphonse, and before you ask, the armor is part of his training." He pauses, eyebrows lowering. "Why did you need to prove your loyalty to Cornello? It didn't look like anyone else had to." He pulls open the door to the bell tower and heads up the stairs. I hold the door open for Rose and Alphonse – who has to duck to get in – before following him.

I wasn't going to ask why his brother's wearing a giant suit of armor, because that would be rude, but I won't tell him that. "He caught me trying to open a locked door with a paper clip. Probably thought I was going to steal the hymn books."

"Seriously?" Edward asks, snorting.

Coughing, I add, "He also thought I was accomplices with a wanted criminal, even though it was totally not my fault that the guy could kill people with his bare hands." I arrive at the top of the bell tower and walk over to the ledge, saved from having to explain the Jason Pelion Incident in further detail. I'd counted five flights of stairs, but looking down at the ground, it feels more like ten.

Alphonse looks at me – at least, I think he's looking at me, it's a little hard to tell with those beady red eyes of his. "Do you know where Cornello's office is? If Ed's plan is going to work, we'll have to go there."

I pull out a napkin from my pocket and unfold it. "Someone drew me a map of the building so I wouldn't get lost?" I hold it out nervously.

Edward takes the map and studies it. "Perfect," he says, handing it back to me.

"I'll get the bell." Alphonse inclines his head towards the top of the bell tower. I'm not sure how he'll be able to reach it, but a lot of things in Liore don't make any sense. "It'll be safer if you two stay here." He points to Rose, and then to me. "Cornello won't be very happy once he realizes all of his followers heard him admit to using alchemy to fake his miracles. He'll probably try to attack Ed, and anyone with him."

I stare down at the people milling about on the ground below. "Can't I come with you? I don't want to just wait here uselessly." Someone waves up at me, and I resist the urge to back away. There's no angry mob forming, so the news must not have gotten out yet.

Shrugging, Edward sighs, "You can come if you want, but if you get shot, don't say we didn't warn you." He heads down the stairs, and I curse under my breath and run after him.

A few people dressed in all-white uniforms nod at me when I exit the bell tower. "We should go in through the back door," I say once I catch up to Edward, ignoring them. "That's where it'll be the least crowded, so we'll have the best chance of going in unnoticed there." I point my finger at the door's location on the map, even though he's too busy walking to look at it.

"Sounds good." He ducks through the crowd.

I go around it like a civilized person. "From there, there's a staircase at the end of the hallway that leads to the roof. We get off at the third floor. His office is either the second room to the left or the second-to-last room on the right. I'm not quite sure."

Edward glances at me over his shoulder before looking forward again. "How long have you been at Liore?" He almost crashes into a baby carriage.

"Less than a week. Four days?" I guess, putting the map back in my pocket.

We're at the front of the building now. Two guards are stationed at the door, their spears crossed to block access to the church. They don't seem to have noticed us, but it's best not to take any unneeded chances. I walk alongside the wall, not slowing down until I reach the corner and turn it. Thankfully, this side of the building is deserted except for a gardener, who doesn't even glance up as I pass him.

I turn another corner, followed by a scowling Edward. The back door's propped open with a door stopper, and I look around, but no one's there. Maybe someone forgot to close the door behind them once they were finished delivering decorative candles. Slipping inside the empty hallway, I pull out the napkin and try to figure out whether to go left or right.

"Left," Edward says, reading the map over my shoulder.

He's obviously a lot better at deciphering maps than I am, so I hand him the napkin. He folds it as he heads down the hallway, keeping it out in case he needs to look at it again.

A cultist steps out of a doorway on the side of the hall, holding a stack of papers. His eyes widen when he sees us and he opens his mouth, probably to call for help. Edward groans and slams the man's head against the doorknob. He continues walking as if nothing happened, heading to the end of the hallway.

The papers flutter to the ground, and I pick one up. It's some kind of handout. I drop it and keep moving, following Edward through the door and up two flights of stairs.

We reach the third floor. He unfolds the map, stares at it for a few seconds, and pockets it. "Here goes nothing," he says, walking out, stopping in front of the second door to the left, opening it. (There's a sign on it that says Father Cornello.)

I step into the room. "What now?"

Edward examines the broadcasting station on Cornello's desk and picks up a microphone. "We get to work." Unraveling the cord, he places it on the ground by the door. "If he starts shooting, hide behind the desk." He grabs the radio control switch and sits on top of the desk with his legs dangling over the edge. I nudge Cornello's chair, hoping it's one of the ones that spin. It doesn't move, but I sit in it anyway. Edward's head pops up at the sound of footsteps, and he flips the switch on and hands it to me.

Cornello runs past the room before stopping in the doorway. "There you are, you infernal brat!" I'm about to ask if he doesn't see me when he points his cane at me. "And you! You just had to follow my instructions–"

"Instructions? You told me to kill two people!"

"Sacrifices must be made for the good of the order. You're just a boy, you wouldn't understand."

Edward leans on one arm. "You opened fire while four of your followers were still in the room."

Cornello waves his hand dismissively at him. "Collateral damage is a necessity for any war."

"Collateral damage?" I stand up and slam my hands on the desk, dropping the radio controller. "You lie to your followers and convince them that you can perform miracles. They put their trust in you, and you have the gall to call them collateral damage?" I swallow, my throat constricting.

"Did you even try human transmutation before telling them you could raise the dead?" Edward's voice is shaking. He sounds disgusted. "Anyone in Liore would die for you, but you don't care about any of them. You just want your own personal army."

Smiling like a madman, Cornello steps into the room and shuts the door. He taps his cane in his hand. "So you finally figure it out. What're you going to do? No one in Liore will believe you. They believe what I tell them to believe. They're like mindless animals."

I pick up the controller, sliding it across the desk. Edward catches it before it falls onto the floor and holds it in front of him. "Maybe not," he says, "but they'll believe you."

Cornello stares at the radio controller, then at the microphone on the ground at his feet.

I can't stop myself from grinning. "We've been recording since you got in the room. Good luck talking your way out of this." His cane starts to glow, and I drop to the floor, crawling underneath the desk. The carpet disappears – Edward's doing, I'd wager. I hear Cornello fall down, followed by something metal.

Edward sighs. "Don't you get it? I'm the Fullmetal Alchemist. There's no way you can win against me."

Red light reflects off the windows as Cornello stands up. "Even if you are, I'm Leto's emissary!" It brightens and fills up the room, dissipating with a bang that leaves my ears ringing.

"It's… it's a rebound." I can barely hear Edward's voice, but he seems almost horrified.

Cornello says something I can't make out, and the entire building shakes. The desk shudders and starts to tilt. I'm struck with the thought that I should probably back up, but it falls on top of me, knocking me onto my stomach. My head smacks against the ground.


I lift my head off of the floor with a strangled groan. For a brief moment, I wonder why I'm lying on the floor in the first place, but then it comes back to me – the stupid desk. Ahead of me, I can see the lower third of the door and about half of the room, including the giant hole in the ground that definitely wasn't there before.

"Hello? Is anyone there?" My voice echoes around me, drumming into my skull. Wincing, I dig my nails into my hair and wait for my forehead to stop throbbing. When it does, I leverage myself onto my elbows and drag myself forward, inch by inch, towards the light.

The door opens, and someone wearing dress shoes and black pants and carrying a cane walks in. "What am I supposed to do? Everything I had worked for is ruined, and all because of a bunch of goddamned children." It's Cornello. He kneels in front of the desk and starts to shuffle through a bunch of papers on the floor.

Another person steps into the room. They pace in front of the door, their footsteps completely silent, even with their knee-high combat boots. "Honestly, it was mostly your fault." For some reason, his voice sounds familiar.

Cornello seems to recognize him, because he stands up and growls, "You."

"Observant as always, my Father." The man walks forward, and something slams onto the desk. I flinch, biting my tongue and tasting blood. "Where's the boy?" He's whispering now, as if he doesn't want anyone to overhear his question. I put my hand over my mouth to muffle the sound of my breathing.

He swallows nervously, and the sound comes from right above my head. "What boy?" He asks.

"Friar, you idiot."

My heart stops. I freeze in place, holding my breath until my vision starts to swim. What would anyone want with me? The chain around my neck seems to tighten, and I pull it out from under my shirt and stare at Jason's ring. It's probably a Philosopher's Stone, of course the man would want it. But how would he know I have it? He should be looking for Jason, not me. It's his ring, after all.

Cornello makes a noise like a gutted fish. "I don't know where the boy is! He vanished after Fullmetal left. I haven't seen him since, I swear." His voice is trembling; I can barely make out what he's saying.

The man sighs and says, "If you don't know where he is, you're just as useless as everyone else in this church." There's a splattering sound, like a watermelon getting hit with a hammer, and I close my eyes and bury my head in my hands. A minute later, I hear the door close, but I stay as still as a statue for what feels like an hour before I gather up the nerve to crawl out.

Edging around the hole in the floor, I tuck the chain under my shirt again and open the door, not looking over my shoulder. Thankfully, the hallway is empty, so no one's there to question why I'm coming out of Cornello's office with dust in my hair and on my clothes.

Once I reach the staircase, I sit down against the wall and take a moment to catch my breath. I'm not really sure what just happened, but I know it's probably best if I don't mention it to anyone.

A cultist stops in front of me, cocking her head to the side. "Do you need help?"

Realizing I don't know how to get outside, I ask reluctantly, "Do you know where the exit is?"

She nods and helps me to my feet, taking my arm and leading me down two sets of stairs, through another hallway and then the sanctuary, and out the front door. "Here you go!" She waves at me and heads back inside. By the time I remember to thank her, she's already out of sight.

I stand on the front steps of the church, looking around and trying to figure out where I should go now. The streets are almost completely deserted, except for a suit of armor and a short boy in a red coat. They're heading towards a building at the far end of the city that looks like some sort of train station. I run after them, trying to catch up.

Someone grabs my arm and drags me into an alleyway. I bite their hand when they try to cover my mouth, and they hiss and jerk their hand away, spinning me around to face them. "Jason?"

He lets go of my arm and I stumble backwards, bumping into the wall. "Did you seriously have to bite me? I hate getting bit." His eyebrows lower. "Well, most of the time." He steps forward, and I step back, but I'm pinned between him and the wall.

"…What're you doing?" I stare down at the ground, my face burning, and it's then that I notice he's wearing knee-high combat boots.

Oh, shit.

Swallowing, I glance up at him. He's smirking. I try to push him away, but he's too close, and I can't get enough leverage. "This – this is about the ring, isn't it?" I stammer, flinching as his hand traces my jawline, trails down my neck.

Jason shakes his head and grabs the chain around my neck, pulling it over my head, dropping it. Speechless, I watch as it falls to the ground with a clatter and rolls into the gutter. He presses the back of his hand against his eyes. "You have to understand, Grif," he says, clenching his teeth. "I don't want to do this, but I have to."

It feels like all the air in my body has just been sucked out with a vacuum cleaner. "What?"

"It was never about the goddamn ring. I was hired to make sure you never left Liore." He takes out the gloves he was wearing the last time I saw him and puts them on.

My breath catches in my throat. I open my mouth, but I can't think of anything to say.

He sighs, running a gloved hand through his hair. "I'd let you go, but the last time I did that, my employer stabbed a butcher knife into my hand and sent someone else to do the job." His voice is no more than a whisper.

"So you're saying that you're going to kill me to save me from possibly getting killed by someone else?"

Jason blinks at me and tilts his head to one side. "Was I not clear enough? My employer wants you alive for some reason. I would've asked why – or their name, actually – but they don't really appreciate when I ask questions." He pauses and adds under his breath, "Probably because they have a giant stick up their ass."

I notice that my hands are still on his chest and yank them back down. "That doesn't make sense. If you don't even know their name, why are you working for them?"

"They're not exactly the type of person you can say no to," he says, shrugging.

"Then you move to another country, and if they follow you, punch them in the face." Realizing that I sound like a complete and utter moron, I snap my mouth shut.

His brow furrows. "I can't do this." He pinches the bridge of his nose, steps backwards. "If they want you so bad, they can get off their ass and get you themselves, because if I spend one more second around you, my head is going to explode." He walks out of the alley without looking back.

When I snap out of my daze and step out of the alleyway, Jason's nowhere in sight.


Writing this chapter… was the mental equivalent of giving a bunch of monkeys typewriters and waiting for them to type Romeo and Juliet. That makes no sense, but that's what it felt like.

Quite honestly, I thought I'd never finished this. I tried writing it about five different times, but nothing was working, so I put it aside and eventually the ghost of this story came back to haunt me and I wrote this in a week.

Responding to reviews from almost a year ago feels really weird, but I'll do it anyways.

Xandora: To use an actual Philosopher's Stone you'd have to have some knowledge of alchemy, but for fake ones like Jason's and Cornello's, no knowledge is required. (It's never explained in canon, but this is what I'll stick with in the story.)

quadraticutie: I shouldn't even dignify that with a response, but this is the part where I respond to reviews, so…

lilaclily00: Everyone is here for the plushies. I'm only here for the plushies. And I like how you put manly laugh instead of just laugh. Makes me think of Armstrong.

An Arm and a Leg: Grif is… a character, that's for sure. At times when I was writing this chapter, I just stared at my computer screen and thought, "Grif, no."

Guest: Thanks! I'll make sure to use that if I ever need to describe a leap/tackle/hug again.

SupremeGeneralJoker: I did it. Shia Labeouf would be proud of me.

Crystal12345: I'm not sure if you left a review or not – I got an email about it but it's not showing up in the reviews – but I guess it's your lucky day.