Thanks for all the reviews, I'm glad that you all are enjoying this! Here's the next chapter!


Her thumb rubbed sharply against her temple as Will's words replayed in her mind.

"Just let him go, Erin. Let him go. I'll go and look for him after my shift."

Erin parted her lips to protest before Will shook his head, his eyes hard.

"No. Not happening, you're not going after him again. This is not up for discussion. I'll call you in the morning once I figure out where he ended up this time."

One look at Will and Erin could tell there was no way she was going to change his mind. She nodded once, giving him a soft smile as he walked toward the door to start his shift at Chicago Med.

He turned back as his hand reached the doorknob, a smile planted on his lips. "Try not to stress. I'll call you, first thing."

Erin let out a deep sigh, her eyes drifting over to the small clock on the upper right side of the computer monitor.

10:47 am

Erin frowned, rolling her eyes as she pulled out her phone and sent a quick text to Will. She let her head fall backward, resting against the top of her chair as her eyes drifted closed. So much for calling first thing. Shaking her head, Erin ran her hands roughly against her face before pushing away from her desk. Her chair rolled roughly against the hard floor. Eyes lingered on her as she mumbled a quick excuse into the air, raising her empty cup as if to emphasize her mandatory escape to the breakroom.

The loud buzzing of the gate to Intelligence stopped Erin in her tracks as she turned toward the sound of hard footsteps coming up the staircase.

"Ha! There's my boy!" Atwater chuckled, standing from his spot perched against his desk.

The gaze of all members of intelligence turned in union as Ruzek shuffled his way up the last two steps and into the bullpen.

"Hey hey hey." Adam hollered back, doing his best impersonation of Dwayne from What's Happening. His eyes were hazy and filled with emotion as he took another small step forward to meet Atwater in the center of the room. Atwater quickly swung his arm out to firmly place it against Adam's back and then stilled for a long moment as his eyes softened before gently leaning in to give him a solid hug.

"Missed you. A lot, bro. We're all really glad you're finally back." He said firmly, his hand gripped tightly onto Ruzek's shoulder. He gave him a solid nod and genuine smile before stepping back and allowing the other members of the unit a chance at their greetings.

Erin stood against the breakroom door, the empty cup gripped tightly in her hand as she observed the warm welcome. Taking a deep breath, she forced a smile on her lips and willed away the overwhelming tightness forming in her chest. As if on cue, Ruzek lifted his gaze away from the conversation with Olinsky and over toward her. He offered a small smile- although his eyes were somber, brows drooping slightly.

Erin quickly widened her smile, nodding once over to him. She pushed herself off of the doorframe and toward the middle of the room. "Welcome back, Ruzek."

He matched her smile, tilting his head. "Thanks."

"Ruzek! You're late." Voight growled, effectively cutting off Adam's welcome ceremony as he made his way out of the small office attached to the side of the bullpen and up to his detective. Adam's eyes widened in surprise as he stuttered, at a loss of words over how to inform his sergeant of his purpose for being over forty-five minutes late to his designated start time on his first day back.

Voight's stern eyes softened as he took another step forward and offered Ruzek a firm handshake. "Welcome back, kid. Glad to see you're doing so well."

Ruzek gave an unsure smile in return.

"I assume all of your paperwork is already in order?" Voight asked, nodding toward the staircase to where Adam dropped off the large stack of medical forms to an uncharacteristically pleasant Sargent Platt just minutes before.

"Yes sir. Everything is taken care of."

Hank gave a solid nod, motioning toward Ruzek's empty- and overly tidy- desk. "Good. Get comfy, you've still got two weeks of desk duty before we can have you out in the field. I want you back out on the streets as fast as possible."

A genuine smile spread across Adam's face as he took a step across the bullpen. "Thanks boss, it's good to be back."

Voight let the smile linger against his lips as he turned to face the rest of the unit. Noticing Erin shift awkwardly from foot to foot- eyes transfixed on the floor, he cleared his throat. "Alright. Enough with the family reunion. Let's get back to work, huh? O, why don't you take Burgess and go check out that bust in that warehouse over on Wabash, see if it could have any association with Reymond."

The two gave a solid nod as they grabbed their jackets, heading out the back staircase of the building. As they left, Voight quickly got Ruzek updated on their newest case before he settled back into his office with the instructions of one hour for new information to be handed to him. Shuffling of papers and clicking of keyboards were quickly heard as the rest of the unit began scouting out all sources for new evidence.

Twenty minutes later Erin was no closer to getting any work done. She stared blankly at the lock screen of her desktop, her thoughts traveling a mile per second as she tried to will away the emotions threatening to escape. Standing from her desk, Erin did a quick sweep of the room, assessing all of her co-workers entranced in paperwork. She took quick strides into the breakroom before finally letting out a deep, uneven breath. Running a hand through her hair, Erin stared at the empty coffee maker, shaking her head before busying herself with the task of making a new pot.

The footsteps behind her momentarily transported Erin back in time to a period of playful banter, deep chuckles, and breakroom conversations. She rolled her eyes, quickly becoming aware of the fact that that was just a far off memory.

Ruzek paused, stilling for a moment as his eyes lifted from the grimy floor at the realization Erin was at the counter. Honestly, he hadn't noticed her get up and wasn't focused enough to realize she wasn't hunched behind her desk as he passed it by. He turned on his heels in an attempt to leave the room, but she turned over her shoulder, catching him in the act.

"Hey." she offered, her eyes returning to the brewing pot in front of her.

Adam sighed, taking short, slow steps forward as he cleared his throat. "Hey. Uhhmm. How's everything?"

"Fine." Erin replied quickly, her eyes never leaving the machine.

A few moments passed by as Ruzek took another step forward toward the machine. He watched her as she stared blankly at the the now-full coffee pot before he sighed and grabbed two mugs from the sink. He poured himself a cup of the steaming, freshly-brewed liquid. Turning then, he tilted the pot slightly as an offer and she nodded before he filled the other as well and then placed the pot back on the counter.

"How're you doing?" Erin asked, her eyes dropping toward the light purple-yellow bruise noticeable above the collar of his shirt and then dropping farther down to his plaid button down. Her eyes lingered for a few moments, deep in thought, before he cleared his throat effectively shifting her gaze back to meet his.

"I-I, uhh. I'm pretty good, Lindsay. Stitches are finally out; doc says I should be good to go soon."

He stared at her for a moment, her eyes filled with unshed tears as she quickly focused her attention at a spot of cold, spilled coffee on the counter.

"So that…that's good." He added into the silence.

Erin forced a small smile as she sniffed, willing away any unwelcome emotions. "Good."

Ruzek took in a deep breath as his eyes scanned over her small frame. He sighed. Placed his lips against the rim of the cup and took a small sip of the scorching bitter coffee before meeting her eyes once again. "How is he?"

The question caught her off guard. She honestly wasn't expecting him to bring it up at all. Let alone in the breakroom, in the middle of the day, during a case. Her eyes widened but she quickly gained her composure, leaning into the cabinet and staring down at the steam billowing up from the mug in her hand. "He's fine." she replied sharply.

Adam's eyes scanned over her, he was aware that he was well out of the loop, but there was no way in hell Jay was fine. Or anywhere close to being fine. And the little he had discussed with members of the unit and Kim over the past few weeks let him know there was a lot more going on than fine. "Alright." he nodded.

"Look, Erin- I know I already tried once, and he didn't want to hear it…but-but maybe I could try talking to him again. It-it wasn't his fault and I think maybe if I could just-"

"NO!" she shot back, slamming the coffee mug hard against the counter. The fullness of the cup caused the action to send the hot liquid flying over the rim and onto her hand, but she ignored it as her face hardened.

Adam's eyes widened as he took a small step backwards, sensing the rage built up inside her.

"Jay doesn't need you to throw empty words at him. He doesn't need your useless assurances and sad-ass stares. He's a fucking mess, Adam! And there's nothing you or anyone else for that matter can do to fix it, so just mind your own damn business and stay the fuck out of his life!"

Ruzek could only nod in response. He stared at her for a moment, bug-eyed as he gulped. Opened his mouth to speak before a voice cut into the tension of the room.

"Lindsay! My office." Voight barked, his voice loud and determined as it shot through the breakroom door.

Erin's eyes widened in response as she registered the events of the last few minutes in her mind. Turning toward the door she watched Hank stare at her behind questioning eyes and didn't miss the sad looks she was receiving from the unit past the doors of the break room. She quickly whipped her head back around, stared into Adam's stunned eyes, and sighed as she opened her mouth to try to form some kind of appropriate apology for her outburst. It was his first day back, he went through hell that night and somehow Erin had managed to push all of her pent-up frustration toward him. Just because he was there didn't make him the right target.

"Lindsay, now!" Hank's gravely voice boomed once again, eyes hard.

Erin nodded once before offering Ruzek a small smile. His gloomy, understanding eyes met hers as he watched her step inside Voight's office and slowly shut the door.

Hank sighed, sitting in his oversized, black office chair and folding one leg over the other. He motioned Erin to sit across from him and she groaned before taking a step further inside. She sat, her whole body tense, resting on the edge of the hard seat. "How are ya holdin' up today?"

"Me?" Erin questioned.

"Yeah, you. You are Lindsay, right?" sarcasm dripped from his voice, a small smirk pulling at his lips. But Erin sat still, absentmindedly twisting the small diamond pressed close to her knuckle in between her thumb and index finger.

Hank eyed the movement, taking another deep breath before focusing his attention back toward her bleak eyes. "I meant what I said, kid. All you gotta do is say the word. I'll find him, come hell or high water. I'll bring him home."

She shut her eyes, sighing loudly before running a hand through her short blonde locks. "He came home, Hank."

The shock was evident on his face as Hank sat up in his seat. His elbows rested firm against the dark wood desk as his brow knitted up in confusion. "He came home? As in home, home?"

An unintentional laugh escaped Erin's lips. "Yeah. I mean, not willingly. And once he was fully aware of it, he took off pretty quick. Not even Will could stop him."

Hank scoffed. "Why didn't you call me?"

Erin shrugged, her body relaxing slightly into the old chair. "I want him home because that's where he wants to be. That's where he needs to be. Not because we force him there- tie him to the bed and shove our version of heartfelt words down his throat."

Hank let out a small chuckle. He'd be lying if he said it didn't kill him to watch Erin fall apart from Jay's absence. But it also became harder and harder with each case to stare at an empty desk where one of his best detectives usually sat. "Hey, we do what we gotta do to get him back."

Erin nodded. "I guess so."

"You know, you don't gotta go through this alone." Hank added, his eyes warm. "Lean on your team, your family." he emphasized with a hard stare.

A ghost of a smile passed across Erin's lips as she rose from her seat. "Yeah." she said with a dip of her head. Then she pointedly jerked her thumb toward the door, a silent question Hank answered with a single nod.

She took two small steps, her hand gripped tightly around the door handle before she turned her head over her shoulder. Determined eyes meeting his awaiting stare.

"I'm not giving up on him, Hank. Ever."

He nodded, a sincere smile on his lips. "I know, kid. I wouldn't expect anything less."

She grinned, shrugging her shoulders slightly as she turned back toward the door. Swung it open quickly. The softness of his voice stunned her as Hank called her name into the space between them.

She turned fully around, hair brushing against her cheek as her eyes met his.

"Just…be careful. Take care of yourself." he said with a half-small smile.

The corner of her mouth twitched up in return. "Of course." she whispered in reply before heading back toward her desk.

It was a peculiar thought, the idea that Hank was telling her to watch her back around Jay. It made a thick lump form in her throat and she willed herself for the umpteenth time that day for the tears not to fall.

Over the past couple of years, the relationship between Hank and Jay had grown from a sergeant-detective bond to something much greater. Erin would love to take all the credit for the sudden change. To say it was due to the relationship she had between both men, and the equal amount of love they shared for her. But she knew that wasn't the full reason.

As Jay's years in intelligence grew, Hank respected his outlook on the law. He never faltered in decisions, completely loyal to the system through-and-through. It made them butt-heads in the beginning, nearly every case leading to some sort of disagreement. But Hank valued Jay's opinion and trusted him completely. It made him shudder at the memories of that night. Shed tears of his own as he clasped his hand tightly onto Jay's arm, pulling him tight against his embrace. Fight like hell as Jay distanced himself from cases, eventually detaching himself from the precinct all together before Hank answered a call late one night from a sobbing Erin. Try every trick in the book to convince her to let him and Al go out searching for him those first few days. But Erin was adamant and stubborn, resisting his help every time he tried.

Her own methods worked just as well. She tailed his car. Showed up at Chuck's- or whoever else's house he was staying at for the night- just to check how he was doing. To make sure he was still in one piece. She left countless voicemails and texts, filling his phone full with worried messages. Only occasionally receiving the very short 'I'm fine' message in return. But those two words were enough to let her hold out hope, hold onto something. Jay was there, her Jay. She just had to help him find that version of himself again.

Erin dragged herself against the old, cracked tiled floor. The short walk to her desk taking a considerably long amount of time as she let her mind wander. The buzzing of her phone against her thigh brought her out of her dazed state as she fought with the tiny opening of her pocket for a moment before bringing the little black phone to her ear.

"Lindsay." she mumbled into the small speaker.

Her heart dropped as the voice connected into her ear. The words on the other end came out rapidly and Erin struggled to keep up, only catching one word here-or-there and jumbled together statements. The frantic voice boomed through her eardrum and she shook her head, her hand clenching tightly around the cell phone as tears clouded her vision.

"Will. Will!" Erin screamed into the phone, effectively gaining the attention of the other detectives in the bullpen. "Calm down." She urged, more to herself then to him.

Grabbing her keys from her desk, Erin's feet fell heavy against the tile as she sprinted toward the gate leading away from Intelligence. She completely ignored the worried calls being shouted after her as she spoke into the phone again. "I'll be there in ten minutes."


A/N: As promised this was a little more about Erin without Jay. Hopefully it's (very) slowly starting to piece together for everyone, I promise in the next couple of chapters you'll get the full story of what happened. I'm just enjoying gradually building up to it now. Let me know what you thought!