AN: Dear readers, I have taken more than a few liberties with the characters in this chapter. I should only warn that I made up the story between Costia, Roan and Lexa to give it a little more imagination to this fic, so yeah everything is based solely on my imagination. I tried not to like Roan in the show, but I do like him, so I thought he deserved a good role and somehow the triangle made sense (in my head at least), so don`t get offended. Having said that, the only thing left for me to do is thank you for the comments and likes and wish you to have fun reading this chapter and stay tuned for the next one.

The night was quiet and I was even more comfortable than originally expected to be, when suddenly I could feel strands of my hair being tugged at and pulled. I decided not to react however, I just turned around to face her and a second later a slap landed on my cheek and made me open my eyes pretty fast. Oh, I had forgotten completely about the little bug between us, she was looking at me with her big, deep eyes and a bright smile. The first sunrays were beginning to caress softly the sleepy night sky and I knew that even without the little one between us I`d have woken up pretty soon. Unlike the Prisa, I was used to getting up early, go for a run and train for a few hours. Seems like the little bug is a morning person as well…that would be interesting.

- Clark…- I said gently nudging her shoulder. She was still in the same position she was when she fell asleep. She looked so innocent and seeing her so vulnerable always made my hearth beat a little faster.

- Clark, time to wake up, the little bug is already awake and I have absolutely no idea nor desire to deal with it.

- Mmm…Her! – was just the grumble response I could get from the Skaiprisa.

- Fine, her. You still have to get up though. – I tried once again, being well aware of how hard it was for Clark to wake up this early.

- Five more minutes…

She didn`t even manage to finish her sentence before she pulled the furs further into her and drifted off again.

Great, now I had to deal with that little thing too and she was beginning to reach for my arms. Seeing her so little though, I was afraid that I might grip her a little too tight and hurt her, so I offered her my hand instead and she gasped it firmly, forcing her little body to sit up on the furs. She truly is strong, perhaps once we were done with our mission we could leave her for a while with Octavia and Lincoln, they are much more prepared than me or Clark to take care of her. Lincoln always liked kids, even before the skaikru arrived to earth he would take special precautions when training with the little ones and Octavia, well she was a natural, if judging by the way she played with the kids from the streets was anything to go by. Whenever she wasn`t on duty as my personal guard she could be seen either playing some old world game of seek and hide with the kids or reading to them and they seemed to always watch her with adoration. Well that seemed as a good plan, but at the current moment I still had to deal with the little bug that was beginning to get grumpy from being still in one place, so I had to find a way to keep her mobile and train myself – how hard could that be right?

- Okay you little bug, come here. – I said to her and lifted her up with all the gentleness I could muster. I brought her to my chest and her head rested for a while on my shoulder. She was so small and delicate, but she was also strong and agile, she would make a fine warrior someday.

With the little one tucked carefully in my embrace, I started making my way through the trees and to the nearby pond. I had to skip my morning jog routine, but that didn't mean I couldn`t exercise at all, I remember how the women from my kru had invented something that looked like a big "pouch" made from old rags and somehow used it to secure the babies on their back or front and that gave me the perfect idea. I looked around for a while and found exactly what I was looking for. After a good hour of binding and intertwining green twigs and vines together I managed to make something that resembled a big pouch with two holes on the left and right lower corners. The green twigs are very easily bound, but very hard to break because of their elasticity. Now that the "pouch" was done, all I had to do was find the perfect tree with big, strong branches in order to attach the pouch to it and begin with my training. We were surrounded by the river from one side, a small clearing and the forest on the other, so finding the perfect tree wasn`t that hard. I took a few more green twigs and vines and intertwined them as a rope, it wasn`t very sophisticated, but it would do the job. I threw the improvised rope around the branch and it was the perfect length – that made me smirk with satisfaction from my work, it was not too short for it to be dangerous for the little bug is she would fall, but also not too short for it to be able to swing properly and keep the little one happy. The moment I placed her inside the twig pouch and pushed her lightly she started giggling again. She was a funny little thing, she was smiling so much and that made me wonder again about the people that had left her behind and their motives to do so. After a moment of being lost in my own thoughts, I backed away a few steps from the baby and took out my sword. I swung rapidly and mercilessly in the air and the sound from my blade made the little bug turn her head toward me, but there was something strange now, her eyes seemed lost. She seemed disorientated, but she kept still in her pouch, so I continued with my exercises, making a silent note to discuss this with the Skaiprisa once she has decided to grace us with her presence. And what a magnificent presence it was.

The sun had come up completely and was now shining brightly upon us, making our surroundings seem even more beautiful than before, lush green grass decorated the area of the river banks, bushes with berries were hiding between the forest trees, even the birds around us sang a quiet symphony. I noticed that my belly was grumbling quite loudly and remembered that we still had to eat breakfast, so with one final look to the now sleeping little bug, I headed towards the river. Laying gently my clothes on the river shore, I was halfway in when I heard her crying and ran out rapidly to where she was, from the rush of the moment I only had time to grab my sword though. When I got there I looked around and saw nothing and nobody so I relaxed a little and took the little bug in my arms making sure she was ok, until a raspy voice interrupted my thoughts.

- Not that I mind you showing off your splendid figure Heda, but I think you should select a more… grown up and appreciative audience next time. – the sassy voice was just an octave lower at my title and a burning sensation passed through the pit of my stomach and I knew that it wasn`t just from the hunger for breakfast when I saw Clark coming from behind the bushes.

I could feel my ears burning and my cheeks slowly reddening, but I refused to show my intimidated self, besides I was still wondering at all the possibilities that included the word "appreciative" in her previous sentence.

- And you should know better than to try and sneak up on me Prisa.

Just before I got the chance to finish my sentence I was interrupted… yet again, because on awful smell made me wrinkle my nose and turn my head away from the baby in my hands. Clark only laughed harder at my expression and moved towards us.

- I think you should take her now Clark. – I said while trying desperately not to breathe through my nose. Even though I had expressed a suggestion, it was obvious for the two of us that it had sounded more like a desperate order.

- Sometimes I wonder who is the baby here. She just needs to be changed. – The blonde said it as if it was the most natural thing in the world, and maybe it was, but not in my world. My world was dark and shady and bloody and an innocent baby had no place in it.

- Perfect, then you know what to do. I already watched after her almost all morning and it is much more than I signed up for.

- You just made her a swing and let her in it while you were practicing all the time!

- All the time, huh? Exactly how long did you stand there watching us, Skaiprisa? – It seemed to me that she had seen more than just my run out of the water, but I decided not to pressure my luck. Even though we never talked about the wounds between us, they were still there, patched up, but still fresh and I every night my nightmares would confirm it.

- Fine, go wash yourself and catch us something good to eat. – She said reluctantly, trying to avoid my question.

- I will. I`m hungry. – And after I handed Clark the little bug, I headed rapidly down to the river again.

- You always are! – I heard her reply in the distance.

It was good that the water from the river was cold, lately I always needed a cold water shower when I was around Clark and when she was flirting shamelessly with me, that was just mean of her, but I have to admit, I loved every second of it.

When I got back to our camp I was fully dressed again and with two big trout fishes in my hands, already cleaned and ready to roast.

- Those look yummy. – Clark said sarcastically.

- I guarantee they`ll taste even better, after being cooked. – I said and saw her bite her tongue in order not to comment on that.

- Did you change little stinky here? – I asked and put the trout over the fire.

- Take her and see for yourself. – Clark challenged me and chuckled.

- I`ll take your word for it.

- She even ate all of her berries, but with the way she is looking at that fish I think you might have to go back to the river and fish us one more.

- I`m not sharing with her then. I`m hungry.

- Oh you are such a grown up Commander. – She said sarcastically and continued.

- I wonder how we will manage back in Polis with the two of you, she is only going to get bigger and that means that her appetite will increase as well.

I couldn`t help but smile at that comment, she was thinking of us, of going back to Polis, of life in Polis. Yes, perhaps there was hope after all.

- So you miss it too? – I asked her tentatively, almost afraid of her answer and I could tell that she also felt how the lightness of our previous conversation was now gone and it was shifting into a serious talk.

- Oddly enough, yeah. But I don`t think Polis changed the way I think about you, it just changed me. Before you made Roan take me to Polis, I was lost. I felt confused, betrayed, alone. – Her words brought up tears to my eyes, because I knew that I was the only person responsible for those feelings she had felt.

I could say a hundred times over that I had no choice, and it may even be the truth, but it never made it easier. I wanted to make her smile, make her feel safe and give her a place where she belonged, instead I had become a key figure in her nightmares. Part of me will never forgive myself, but the other part knows that it was a sacrifice necessary for my people, I laik Heda, I kept repeating myself that.

- I was bitter and I wanted vengeance, not for you leaving me to face the mountain on my own, but for you mending my hearth after the whole Finn thing and then shattering it again, only this time to an even smaller pieces. – Clark continued and her bittersweet voice almost made me crack and spill all the tears I had in my glassy green eyes.

The memory was still fresh in our minds and the pain still hit us hard. I could never look into her eyes in the few occasions we talked about that and now was no exception, I kept looking down and played absentmindedly with some grass, trying to keep my hands busy.

- After seeing you with the nightbloods and how you trained them, not only on the training grounds, but in your room as well. Teaching them honor and compassion and not only sword fighting, after seeing how the people on the streets looked at you, with respect and love and adoration. After seeing what you do for your people and most importantly after seeing you fight Roan, I realized that life was too short to try to convince myself that I hated you. I was hurt, in some ways, I still am, I am not healed yet, but I could never hate you or want you dead. I am incapable of thinking with my head instead of my hearth when it comes to you Lexa. – Clark tucked gently a strand of wet hair behind my ear and lifted my chin up for me to face her.

- I am done wasting time, not knowing how long we have. Trust is a precious and fragile commodity, but when you bowed before me, I knew that given the choice I would trust you with my life again. Wanheda did bow before Heda, and for her people she`d do it again, but I could see it in your eyes that it was Lexa who bowed to Clark that night and knowing that I have no doubt that you will protect not only our people, but also the two of us, as one. And now... we even have a life of our own to protect. – She said looking down to the little bug that was asleep between us, but she didn`t move an inch from her seat.

- I trust you with something far more precious than my life Clark, I trust you with my hearth and I know Roan will not move against the coalition, but his mother is still a big problem for us and more importantly for me. – I couldn`t trust my voice to speak to much, so I decided to keep my sentence short and to the point, images of Costia were already coming up in my head again.

- What is the deal with you and Roan? He is Azgeda and yet you let him roam free through your city, you let him practice before your combat, you even sent him from all your warriors to protect me, Wanheda, the person who everybody was searching for with the only desire to kill me and take my power.

- It is along story Prisa, one that is not easy to recall, but you should know that I know prince Roan from when we were just seconds, before I became Heda, before the war between Azgeda and Trikru. Queen Nia was always jealous of me, because I was a nightblood, she was grooming Roan for my position since he was born and as a prince he had the privilege of studying in Polis, the only thing he lacked was the color of my blood. When we were children we even fought together while training. He knew Costia too, we used to go swimming together. But when it became clear to the Ice Queen that I was Heda, she ordered Roan back to Azgeda and she never let us see him again, until she exiled him for loving someone she didn`t approve of. Roan is a strong warrior, but his upbringing made him ruthless at times. And before you ask, no we are not friends, but we are not enemies either, at least not like me and Queen Nia.

- But if he knew Costia, why did he let his mother do what she did to her? He could`ve helped her somehow, I`m sure nobody would have disregarded the orders of the prince.

- And what makes you think he did not try Clark? – I said to her and looked her with tired eyes, it was the first time in a very long time I let myself talk about that. But she had to know.

- When he found out that Queen Nia had captured Costia, he went to beg for her life, he even challenged his mother for it. That is why he got exiled from his own kru. The Queen saw his sentiment as weakness and she wouldn`t have it.

I watched as realization slowly hit Clark and she only nodded in understanding, giving me a silent nudge to go on with my story and after a heartbeat of silence, I found my voice again, low and fragile, but decided to finish the story.

- Yes, Clark, Roan cared for Costia deeply. He always respected her choice to be with me, but our friendship fell apart because of this. Roan loved Costia almost as much as I did. I received her head, but he saw her execution, I could not wish such a horrible faith even to my worst enemy. He managed to kill her executioner, but the main honor remained mine. Jus drein jus daun. It is much more than simple words Clark and the Ice Queen knows it too.

TBC...