A/N: INSOMNIA STRIKES AGAIN. And apparently Depressed!Roy is enjoyable to write? IDK. Pretty much this is a few scenes from Children of Snakes from Roy's POV, because I can. (Set entirely during chapter eight.)

Now let's all pretend I'm not stupidly in love with this terrible song.

Warnings: MOAR DEPRESSION.

Summary: Roy doesn't deal well with being left behind.


A Whisper of Smoke

So I'll kiss you longer baby

Any chance that I get

I'll make the most of the minutes and love with no regrets

-Meghan Trainor feat. John Legend

The thing was, with both Harry and Ed away in England, there was nothing to keep his darkest thoughts at bay.

He should have seen it coming, really. He's nothing without Ed any more, hasn't been since the brat waltzed into his life and broke down all his walls without even trying, and the fears his husband disbands are persistent in the silence of an empty house. A little voice somewhere in the back of his head always insists that he'll lose Harry to the new country, that Ed will find some young Englishman to be more desirable than the washed up general he left at home, that free of Roy's influence both of them will realize how much better they can do.

He knows it's ridiculous. He tells himself this several times a day. Harry loves him, has always thought Roy was the best father anyone could have. And Ed, hell, Ed had agreed to marry him, had vowed to spend the rest of his life at Roy's side. He'd never have agreed to the ceremony if he hadn't meant it, and Ed's devotion was unshakable.

But the thoughts still came. Within weeks, listening to reruns of Harry's favorite cartoons failed to be enough to distract him. The letters he received from Ed and Harry failed to reassure him. The nights began to stretch long and endless and crushing ahead of him.

So he started spending longer hours at work, slowly shifting through more paperwork than he could ever remember doing in his life. At least there, with the bustle of the office to soothe him, he could push the thoughts away in order to concentrate on the extremely important work that needed to be done.

Unfortunately, no amount of distracting himself with work was able to keep his lack of sleep and growing depression a secret from Maes and Riza. One moment he was pushing himself through the most boring report he'd ever read; the next, Maes was taking the pen and papers from his hand and ushering him to his office door.

"You need a break, sir," Riza said flatly when he gave her a beseeching look as he was jovially shoved out the door by his best friend.

"I really, really don't," Roy said, firmly, but Riza and Maes both gave him identical unimpressed looks. He gave up.

Maes drove him home, silent and serious. Roy stared out the window the entire time, pretending he wasn't sulking as he bleakly considered what he could try to distract himself with next.

When they walked into Roy's house, Maes guided him directly to the living room, where a fire was already burning and a suitcase was sitting by the couch. Roy stared at it for a long moment, then gave Maes a look of his own.

"I've been in contact with Dumbledore," Maes started, and held up his hands defensively as anger surged in Roy's gut. "Look, I know how you feel about the man. But the solution to your problems right now is so obvious I'm surprised you didn't just go to Hogwarts as soon as it started."

Roy stared at him, bemused. "You're sending me to Hogwarts?" he asked blankly, because he needed to be sure.

"I'm sending you to your family," Maes corrected, giving him a sad smile. "I think I know how you feel right now, with both of them so far away. You're always so afraid you're going to lose the people you love, and after so many near misses I think you believe you're due for it soon, one way or another. I'm pretty sure seeing how much they love you again will at least get you through a couple more weeks. So I owled the headmaster and asked him if it would be okay if you spent a weekend there because you'd been working so hard lately you needed a little vacation."

"That sounds...lovely," Roy said, a bit uncertainly. "Do they know I'm coming?"

Grinning, Maes shook his head. Roy gave him a little smile back, the best he could manage at the moment, and picked up his suitcase. One hand in his Floo powder, he turned to his best friend and said "thank you" with complete sincerity. Then he stepped into the fire before Maes could get ridiculous, as he most assuredly would.

Roy looked at his pocket watch as he approached the gates to the Hogwarts grounds, shaking his head at himself. He'd made it to the castle in record time, unable to pretend to himself that he wasn't desperate to see Ed and Harry again, and it wasn't even lunchtime in Scotland. Never having made any plans to visit his son at Hogwarts, he had no idea where either of them would be, and he wasn't looking forward to finding them.

Fortunately, when he looked up, he found a familiar face looking back at him with a sardonic eyebrow raised.

"Good morning, General," Severus Snape said, not smiling.

Roy wasn't sure how he felt about the man. Snape never failed to be polite to him, if not pleasant, and it was obvious he was fond of Ed (or at least Ed's brain), but something about him just didn't sit right with Roy. And Harry was certain that Snape hated him. It was difficult to like anyone who didn't like his son.

"Good morning, Severus," Roy replied, unfailingly polite because it was pointless not to be. "I suppose Dumbledore asked you to escort me to the castle?"

Snape snorted unpleasantly. "He wants me to show you to Edward's room and ask you to wait there," he said distastefully. "As if he doesn't know he won't return to it until after dinner."

Roy smiled thinly. "I suspect he would prefer I remain out of sight after our most recent discussions."

Snape's smirk said everything he didn't seem to feel comfortable saying, and they walked silently across the grounds. Judging by the number of children watching them with wide eyes, Roy must have shown up during a break in classes, so he was surprised when he was lead forward unhesitatingly. Ed wasn't always predictable in his downtime, Roy knew, but perhaps Harry had developed some habits?

Sure enough, Snape led him over to a courtyard that held quite a few students. Harry was sitting with his friends from his very first day on the train, as well as a little blonde girl he must have met that year, and was arguing with one of them over her homework. Roy paid little attention as Snape threatened the poor girl for cheating, too busy drinking in the sight of his son. The two children spun around at the sound of their professor's voice, and Roy managed a weak grin.

"Hello, Harry," he said, and didn't miss the brief moment of hesitance before his son leapt forward and hugged him around the waist. Roy must be more out of sorts than he'd hoped if even Harry could tell his grin wasn't up to par. He hugged Harry back tightly, not quite willing to let go even when Harry decided he was tired of being used as a teddy bear.

Snape eventually left with what sounded like dire warnings about being late for class, and Harry led the way to Ed's classroom. Roy kept an arm over his shoulder and listened to the children talk with a warm smile, enjoying this new view of Ed as a teacher, but did a double take at the rumors.

"They think what now?" he asked in disbelief. He supposed he ought to feel jealous (Ed was his, and woe betide the man stupid enough to try to take him away), but he was fairly secure in the knowledge that if somebody were to catch Ed's eye in this country it wasn't going to be Severus Snape. And he absolutely lost it at the rumor of Snape being Harry's father, because really?

Ed must have teased the poor man for days. Roy was faintly surprised they were still friends, but probably if either of them had lost their tempers there'd just been a lot of yelling until they both got over it. Ed had a way of working his way into your heart and making a home there without you noticing.

Roy should know. It'd taken him months to realize he'd been in love with the man.

When they reached Ed's classroom, Roy grinned charmingly at the girls already waiting because he knew it would embarrass Harry, and listened with half an ear as Harry explained Ed's latest questionable research habit. He leaned on Harry's desk and waited with the class to see if Ed would notice them, but Ed just kept scribbling away. More students rushed in, and Harry sighed as he reached for some parchment.

"Oh, I don't think that will be necessary today," Roy said, unable to keep the fond smile off his face as he watched his husband's increasingly erratic math. Perhaps it was time to step in. He ruffled Harry's hair on autopilot when his son groaned, but then the rest of the classroom fell from his attention as he stepped around Ed's messy desk and wrapped his arms around his husband's waist.

"Good morning, beautiful," he purred.

"Fuck!" Ed snarled, jumping in surprise and thankfully obliterating the very beginning of his painfully wrong calculations. Then he turned in Roy's arms, cursing fluently in an impressive amount of languages, and glared up at him so fiercely that Roy couldn't have held back the cheeky grin if he'd tried.

"If it's any consolation," he said brightly, "your calculations really started to go off at that point."

Ed flailed at him delightfully, so flustered he was having trouble forming words that weren't just another string of curses. Roy was very familiar with the expression. "You—Bastard!"

"I've long suspected that's actually an endearment coming from you." Ed blushed adorably, and Roy tucked some wayward hair behind his ears fondly, for all the good it would do. "It's almost sweet."

"You're so fucking lucky I love you," Ed growled, poking him hard enough to hurt.

"You think I don't know that?" Roy asked, voice softening against his will. He cupped Ed's face and leaned in close, and Ed's expression finally softened. "I wake up every morning grateful to have you in my life, not sure what I did to deserve you."

"You sound like you think I'm going to leave," Ed said, voice thankfully as soft as Roy's own. He could have been angry about it, but something in his eyes said he understood.

"Never. But sometimes..." It wasn't a sentence he ever wanted to admit out loud. He kissed Ed instead, keeping it soft and simple and at complete odds to what he wanted to do, which was push his husband against the blackboard and kiss him until Ed stopped caring about all the research they were ruining. Somehow, he didn't think the children would appreciate quite that much of a show, though.

Nor would Ed, judging by how hard he shoved Roy into his chair when he finally realized they had an audience. Roy laughed brightly—he couldn't help himself—and settled in to gaze adoringly at Ed as he taught the enthralled students.

When the class finally ended, Roy shooed Harry off to lunch and the door closed behind him with a soft thunk. Ed erased the bored with an irritated flick of his wand, then stomped over to Roy with a scowl. The chair really wasn't big enough for the both of them when Ed climbed on, planting his knees on either side of Roy's thighs, but the cramped closeness was strangely comforting. Ed curled a hand around his neck, leaning in, and this close Roy could see the concern he was trying to hide with anger.

"You look like shit," Ed snapped, which was Ed-code for 'I'm really worried about you and need reassurance right now'.

"I've probably been sleeping about as well as you have," Roy said, running a thumb across the dark circle under Ed's eye. "We should have realized we wouldn't deal well with the separation, love. Neither of us sleep well alone."

"Ugh," Ed groaned in agreement, slumping against his chest. "This sucks. If the Headmaster wasn't such a fuck up—but I can't find any good signs of the stupid Chamber, and this school is just riddled with weird magic—"

"You don't have to solve every problem, darling," Roy said. "All I'm worried about is keeping Harry safe."

Ed rolled his eyes. "Did you know there's a curse on the DADA position here?" he asked lazily. "Noticed it first thing when I accepted the position, feels like a fucking cloud following me around. Strong as hell, too."

"So Lockhart's time here was limited anyway?" Roy asked with a frown.

"Sounds like nobody lasts more than one year in the position," Ed said, "and hasn't in like forty years. Can't believe nobody's broken it yet."

"Let me guess," Roy said dryly. "You're right on the verge of a breakthrough."

"Probably get it in a week," Ed grinned, adorably smug. "But that fucking Chamber..."

"No leads?"

"None that make sense," Ed grumbled, shrugging fluidly. "I'll get it. But right now, you."

"I plan to get plenty of sleep while I'm here with you," Roy assured him promptly, cupping his face and pulling him forwards. "Assuming, of course, we have time with all the sex we have to make up for."

"Pervert," Ed breathed against his lips, but he was still grinning when Roy kissed him.

The sheer exhaustion they were both feeling after the time apart handily prevented them from delaying rest for the sake of sex that first night. They fell asleep almost the moment they laid down, and in the security of each other's arms they slept through the night.

The morning was another story. Waking up still entangled with each other made it easy for Roy to push Ed onto his back, and he held Ed's left hand against the bed with their fingers entwined so he could feel the rings Ed never took off. Sometimes being married still felt like a dream. Sometimes their entire relationship did, and he couldn't help but linger in the knowledge that Edward Elric loved him. This morning he drew out their lovemaking as long as possible, unwilling to risk that stopping meant a return to a much colder reality.

And in the afterglow, when reality continued to be beautifully surreal, he held Ed close and kissed him, lazy and content.

"Think we missed breakfast," Ed said eventually, but made no move to shift himself from on top of Roy.

"Hm, probably," Roy agreed, reaching out a hand to grab his wand. A lazy flick of his wrist had the time floating in front of his face, and he groaned. "We may miss lunch too."

"Like hell," Ed said, starting to push himself up. Roy made a wounded noise and rolled them back over, ignoring Ed's weak smacks and kicks that weren't trying very hard to move him. "Royyyyy, don't do this! I'm hungry!"

"I don't want to get up," Roy sulked very maturely. He made to kiss Ed again, but Ed turned his head and then nipped sharply at his cheek. "Edward, my love. Light of my life. Fire of my soul."

"You stupid sappy fuck," Ed grumbled fondly, pulling him down into a kiss. Roy knew better than to think that it meant he'd won, and wasn't surprised when Ed proceeded to flip them over.

Unfortunately, the play-fight that ensued only ended up with Roy on the floor with a bruised tailbone as Ed disappeared from the room. He sat there for a long moment, silently bemoaning his fate, then went to join his husband in the shower.

They were late to lunch, but that was okay. It only improved the gossip that had been following Ed around since he came to the castle, and Roy was more than pleased when he heard the students slowly figuring out that Ed belonged to him. Perhaps he was a bit over-possessive—Ed would definitely be the first one to say so—but he didn't see any reason not to make sure everyone knew who his family belonged to.

Fortunately, he had been granted several more days off to get his message across. And he intended to make full use of every moment.


A/N: I fully meant for this side story to be much longer and cover Harry's attempts at alchemy and whatnot, but unfortunately I started freezing every time I tried to go any further than this. So this is, unfortunately, where it will have to end.