CHAPTER 2.
Hey everyone! Sorry this took so long to upload- but basically I was really caught up with some issues, and just couldn't wright. Hope this was worth the wait! Thank you so much for everyone's reviews! Really didn't expect such an amazing audience!
Love Sherlockfangirl135 xx
Warnings- bad language, gore, mentions of mental disorders, and angst. Don't like, don't read.
Disclaimer- I do not own Attack on Titan, or Marco would still be alive.
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Levi's mind was racing, sprouting out questions and probable answers like a printing press machine. Guilt and fondness were the only things he could feel, not the determination he knew he had to feel in order to stay alive in an attack. Although the countryside was flying by as he rode, all he could see was Eren's face, which was so shattered and heartbroken, Eren's hands which were shaking, and Eren's stunning green eyes, that begged for love.
Eren didn't understand, and Levi wished he could. He was doing it to protect Eren- because although he was sure that he did not hold romantic feelings for the boy (well, almost sure) he did care about him, and he couldn't..., he just couldn't bare to see someone he cared about die again.
Erwin was the only acceptation to this rule, because Erwin couldn't die. He was as strong as Levi, as smart, and as caring- he was just more outward about it. So Erwin wasn't going to die. Levi had already decided that. Eren however, was young, careless, and naive.
Erwin was riding next to him, his green cape flapping out behind him and his blue eyes set on the horizon. He was in Command mode now, where the only thing that mattered was winning and surviving this particular day. "Erwin,..." Levi yelled, to be heard over the racket of the horses.
"Yes Levi?" Erwin answered, a kindness rooted under his voice.
"I did it to protect Eren, will he understand that?" Erwin thought about this, and looked over at his friend.
"Probably not Levi, if I am honest. But know this, if he is in love, this won't stop him holding these regards for you." Levi's eyebrows rose, and he shook his head.
Erwin smiled sadly, but soon focused elsewhere as the wall could be seen up ahead.
Erwin barked the order to keep going, and stick to the plan. Luckily no titans had been encountered yet, which to be honest, was all to good to be true. It nerved Levi gratefully.
The mission had brought along about 250 odd scouts, and the plan was quite good. Armin and Erwin, with the help of Jean, had been up for three nights recently trying to come up with it, but if everything went right, it should go well.
The scouts were to split into five groups of around 50, and four of the groups were to drive the titans into a specifically large courtyard, where any surviving members from the four groups and the fifth group were to swoop down and kill them all. However, if there were any abnormals, they were to be killed straight away. Eren was to be in the fifth group, and, if given the order, he would change into a titan. That was a last means resort however, as it normally resulted in a very ill and tired boy at the end of it.
All in all, a fail safe plan. But the titans always managed to find a way to fail it.
Erwin hollered his orders, and pulled the trigger on his gun, sending a shooting cloud of green smoke weaving its ah into the sky. Soon the others followed, and Levi knew now to stop thinking about Eren. This was war now. He put on his game face, and went screaming with the rest of the Survey Corps, his best friend beside him, into battle.
Two hours later, all had somewhat gone well. The Scouts had been successful in driving the titans into the courtyard, with only (I say only, but compared to what the Scouts were used to this was a small number) 30% of troops dead so far. Levi and Erwin were currently standing on top of a church, looking over the courtyard. Although they were taking part in the front lines, the two had been forced to draw back as everything was actually under control for once. A handful of other recruits were waiting with them, some of them crying, others just staring out over the battlefield, some laughing.
Levi was watching Eren, and the way his sheer determination was killing the titans off one by one. Erwin had been right, although Eren had actually little skill in cutting them down, his absolute will to do so, and pure anger and hatred, somehow filled his body and allowed him to do so.
Mikasa and Armin we're closely nearby, watching his every move and calculating his every step. Levi pondered what they had been through with him, to make them so attached to the green eyed boy. He had read their military records of course, and seen how Eren and Mikasa had killed three fully grown men at just the age of nine, and Erens repeated violence record for protecting Armin against shallow minded swines. But for them to follow him into war like this, and protect him in the way they did, Levi commended them. That was real love and friendship, risking your life for the one you cared about.
Suddenly though, Levi's attention was stolen from Eren abruptly as a large abnormal- at least 40 meters, came sprinting down the road towards the carefully thought out procedure in the courtyard. Erwin and the others quickly made their way towards it, and Levi took one last lingering glance at the younger boy, and followed the others.
The giant bastard was smiling, and its arms were stretched out to their full wingspan. It's whole aroma spelled trouble.
Erwin went straight for the eyes, and succeeded in blinding it with a flick of his wrists. Levi flew down to the nape, but missed as the titan howled and attempted to grab Erwin. Levi guessed they had a minute, maybe two before the eyes regenerated, and he swooped up to the neck again. This giant monster was not going to throw a spanner in their plans, not when it was going so well.
A scream suddenly echoed out from behind them, and Levi turned to look. He gasped. One of the titans had escaped, and was running wildly towards Eren, Mikasa and Armin. Levi cut down the abnormal 40 meter, with no problem this time, sending it crashing to the floor, smile still plastered on its ugly face, and instantly flew over to help.
It was not big, only about 20 meters, so supposedly easy to kill. This Titan however, did not appear to know this. It screeched and caught Eren by his 3DMG cords, who let out a horrific scream of pure terror and anger, and Levi gasped. It was like something was awoken inside him, a absolute hunger for the blood and body of this beast. He roared and flew foreword, Mikasa and Armin close by, and with his blades, cut the nape of the titan. The titan made a loud groan, before dropping Eren and falling flat on the boy.
Adrenaline still pumping, Levi searched frantically for Eren, and found him, with both legs trapped underneath the now smouldering titan crying.
"Eren!" Levi was pushed aside by Mikasa, who was closely followed by Armin. This bothered Levi, but he supposed that he didn't matter like the other two, not would he let himself believe he cared as much. So he watched silently.
"Eren are you ok?" Mikasa questioned, her dark hair dropping down over her eyes where she was leaning down.
Eren nodded, his green eyes were lying though. He was clearly in pain, and a lot of it.
"I- I hit my head when I fell. I think it's bleeding. Oh God. It doesn't feel right. Help me." Eren was right, the amount of blood pouring from Eren's head was unmeasurable, and it was getting everywhere.
Mikasa pulled back Erens hair, and gasped. Levi shuffled forward so he could see, and his eyes widened. This wasn't good. The cut was extremely deep, so much so Erens scull could be seen shining from beneath, and there were cracks running up it. This was not good at all.
"ERWIN!" Levi yelled, and searched frantically for his friend. Erwin came running and when he saw what had happened, he too gasped. He swivelled to face Levi, who was starting to panic.
"Levi, you stay here and look after Eren, make sure no titans go for him until I get back. We can not abort mission because of this. Everyone else will carry on, and I will send for a cart or horse to take Eren back. Normally he would have to wait, but since he plays such a crucial part to humanity's revenge, he must be kept safe." Levi nodded. Erwin looked at Mikasa, who was stroking Eren's hand and smiling at him, clearly to keep him calm and avoid loosing more blood.
"Mikasa, since Eren means so much to you, and you seem to calm him, you must accompany him back and in hospital." Mikasa beamed at this, clearly Erwin had just made a new friend here. Levi felt- was that jealousy? He mentally slapped himself. Why should he care if this brat died?
Erwin ran off, presumably for the cart, and Mikasa sat down up and looked around, presumably for approaching titans.
"Levi..." Eren whispered. Armin nodded and quickly jumped up and faced his superior, and nodded towards Eren, blond hair bobbing.
"I know you don't care about him Sir,"
'Damn right' Levi thought.
"But please just pretend for now, this doesn't look good and it could..." Armin didn't even kneed to finish, if Eren kept loosing blood at the rate he was, the boy didn't have long. Not to mention any possible brain damage that may have occurred.
Levi nodded, and Armin looked relieved. Well, as relieved as a man who was quickly loosing his best friend.
Levi carefully padded over and sat down, taking a good look at Eren. His eyes were clouded, and streaming with tears, and blood was running down his face like water runs down rocks in a storm. He still smiled at Levi though, and this really moved the shorter man.
"Levi, you look beautiful." He whispered, and he brought his hand up to move the hair from Levi's eyes.
"Your eyes are so kind and bright." Levi took Eren's hand and held it.
"It's ok Eren, you will be seen by a doctor. You will be fine." Levi semi smiled down at the younger boy.
Eren smiled weakly.
"No Levi. I don't think so. I just want to see the outside world. See the ocean. You, Mikasa and Armin, we would have stood and watched it when this was all over, that was the plan." He smiled again, more to himself this time.
"I don't want to die." He looked up at Levi again, his eyes pleading and restless, clearly in pain, and distressed.
"You aren't going to Eren, calm down. It's ok." Levi whispered, as smoothly as possible.
"No, no it's not ok. This isn't ok. I-I don't want to die! I want to go to the ocean with you!" He almost screamed. This wasn't good, the more he worked himself up, the worst it would be.
"EREN CALM DOWN! You will be ok if you don't get worked up!" Levi yelled back. He was getting just as distressed now, Eren was not normally so open with his feelings.
Eren seemed to accept this, and he took a deep breath.
"Levi, I need to tell you in case something happens. You just have to know. And I know that you hate me, and that's ok, but.."
He took a deep breath.
'Don't say it Eren, please don't say it.' Levi begged in his head.
"I love you Levi, with all my damaged and broken heart." And with that, the boy passed out, his blood pooling on the ground. And only then, at these words, did Levi realise that he too, had just joined the group of people who had fallen for Eren Jäeger.
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3 Hours of intense fighting later- the Survey Corps have succeeded in clearing a small of titans, so while half was left barricaded it up, half went back for supplies and medical kits. Captain Levi, Armin and Mikasa were amongst the half that went back, where as Commander Erwin was running the half that was barricading.
The journey home was a long one, the Survey Corps had taken a lot of damage. Over 40% of Scouts that had gone out today had perished, and another 10% seriously injured. Eren amongst that percentage.
Levi was seriously questioning everything he stood for on the way back home. Surely it couldn't be love. No. Captain Levi, strongest human alive, didn't fall in love. It was just affection, what Hanji would call a crush. Simply desire. Still, it was very strong desire. All Levi could think about was Eren, the way he moved, the way he smiled, the way he breathed. Everything suddenly seemed new and fascinating about this boy.
There was another problem. Eren was a boy. There was a nearly 10 year age difference. Hell, even a relationship would be illegal. Eren would have to wait till he was 18 before he could even consider such a thing and that was 3 years away. Would he still want Levi then. Probably not. As Levi had thought earlier, this may just be a phase. If so, Levi was in trouble.
Another problem was the Military's view on this. Even if the two did somehow get permission, Levi highly doubted that their differences in ranks would help. Eren was a private, and Levi was a high ranking officer, who socialised with the commander for gods sake. It would be looked down upon less if they were different species. Levi knew Erwin would not care, but everyone else- they would do more than care. Levi would most likely loose his job, as would Eren, despite their need in the Survey Corps.
Oh, but what did it all matter to Levi? He couldn't care less. His body, his mind, his every wish right now was just to see the boy, and make sure he was ok. And then he could tell Eren he felt the same way, and that he was sorry for earlier, and then he would kiss Eren, square on the mouth, and...
He was brought back to reality from his rather uncharacteristic daydream by the loud horn announcing their arrival home. Levi sighed in relief and brought his horse down to a trot, before riding underneath the gates. About 25 civilians were watching from the sides of the roadside, but apart from that it was quiet. Levi was glad. He quickly dismounted and ordered a few subordinates put away his horse and start gathering the equipment. That was the brilliant thing about being a Captain, you could make other people do what you wanted. He walked off, restraining his shattered legs from running, he knew he must save his energy for potential attacks later, but all he wanted to do was see Eren.
It did not occur to him at this point that this HAD to be more than a crush. That this almost frightening love, that had come out of nowhere, almost mirrored the love he felt for Isabel and Farlan, and it was just as strong. But no, Levi wouldn't admit it, not even to himself, because he was Levi, and the last time he had felt this way towards anyone, they ended up as dead as was possible. And Levi was all too aware, deep down, that the same fate could befall Eren.
Now at the military hospital, Levi was given immediate access by a very intimidated and frightened looking guard manning the door. Levi smirked once out of view, that face that he was often met somewhat amused him. He strutted down the corridor, hips swaying, and the best mood he had been in for, well, years quickly settling down on him. It was not to last.
He turned the corner, and was met by Mikasa, bawling her eyes out, shirt covered in blood, and hugging that God forsaken scarf to her chest. Levi stopped short. This couldn't be good. At all. Mikasa hardly ever showed emotion, and the fact she was crying wasn't good. What the fuck had happened to Eren?
Levi shot her a look of panic, before barging in through the door that lead to Eren's room. Levi was expecting a body, dead or unconscious, but to his relief, Eren was sitting bolt upright in bed, stunning green eyes wide and staring around the room with utter fascination. He has never felt so glad.
"Eren! Oh thank god you are ok!" Levi sighed. Eren squinted at him, and cocked his head.
"Yeah, that's what the girl outside said. I think you have the wrong room mister." Eren shook his head.
"Pardon? Eren, it's me, Levi." Levi just stood there, his eyes as wide as they could be. Which in fairness wasn't particularly wide.
Eren suddenly took a great interest in his fingernails, and didn't make a great effort in Ihiding his complete and utter disinterest in the man he had been so smitten with earlier.
"Sorry. Don't know you. Bye." Eren flopped back down onto his pillow, conversation over. Levi was so confused, which was probably best, as it kept him from feeling the disappointment starting to rise in his heart.
"But, but-" Levi was cut off by the doctor walking in the room, who greeted Levi by a salute.
"Excuse me sir, but I believe you should know that Eren Jäeger has been diagnosed with temporary amnesia. Due to his head injury. I do not know how long, or if it will last. I am very sorry, but he really doesn't know who you are."
This was too much for Levi, in one day, all his emotions had been thrown around like a volleyball, and this was the final straw. He screamed angrily, and the doctor and Eren both jumped high, the doctor making a loud squeak and dropping his clipboard. Levi screamed again, and kicked the bedpost, which sent Eren tumbling out wth a confused yell. The Doctor, nearly crying, ran from the room with a muffled "Thank you Sir." and sprinted off.
Levi walked over to Eren, grabbed him by the collar, and hoisted him up. Eren gagged.
Whatever Levi did though, he could not deny to himself that Eren still looked stunning, with his wonderful ocean eyes glaring up at Levi. Levi ignored this thought, and pushed it down, deep down, beneath everything and let his strength take over.
"Now listen here you little shit. I have had it with you today. Would you believe that ten minutes ago, I believed that I actually had feelings for you? I am never, ever making that mistake again." And with that, he threw a very dazed and confused Eren to the floor, and kicked him square in the stomach, not bothering about being careful with his organs, as they would all regenerate sooner or later anyway.
This was all to similar to that time Levi had beaten Eren to a pulp in the courtroom, except this time it was personal. With a final kick, Levi bashed Eren in the groin, and he left, leaving behind a crying and bloodied boy, already steaming and starting to heal. He walked out the room, spat on Mikasa, who just did nothing but hug her scarf, and slammed the door behind him.
