Chapter III

Falling Stars

Memories, we feed off of them, cling to them, obsess over them. Each memory brings us back to a time when we were most happy or sad. We close our eyes and hope that the day will come when we can reach those happy moments once more, and overcome the sad moments that ruined our lives.

For Leia, it seemed as though all she had were her memories. She stood on the bridge of her ship, Raddus, all by her lonesome. She had appeared on the bridge before anyone else, and it was these moments that she both welcomed and dreaded.

In these moments, she thought about all the good that had come into her life, and all of the bad as well. The past few years had been nothing but a horror story to her conscious, consistently picking at her heart. She felt that she had lost everything.

Not so long ago, she had hugged her beloved husband before a mission to rescue their son, not knowing that it would be the last time she would ever get to hold him again.

All she could do now was stare into the stars that surrounded her ship, hoping to one day find the happiness in them once more.

Trying to snap herself out of the pain she felt, she closed her eyes and took the deepest breath that she could. When she released it, she opened her eyes, feeling focused. Almost simultaneously, the door to the bridge slid open and she was joined by her highest ranked pilot, Poe Dameron. He rushed in, breathing heavily.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you general," he said.

"That's okay," Leia said with a smile. "What is it you need?"

"It's Finn ma'am," he replied. "He's awake."

"Thank you," Leia said, happy at this news. She immediately left the bridge, quickly walking to the Medical Unit.

Finn had been placed under emergency observation due to his injuries sustained in his battle with her son, Kylo. He had been unconscious since the moment of his return.

When she arrived at the Medical Unit, she ushered the nurse and medical bots away, to give them both some privacy. Finn lied in his bed, still looking slightly groggy but alert. His expression looked unsure and confused by Leia's entrance.

"Is there anything else you need from me ma'am?" Poe asked.

"No," Leia replied. "I need to speak with him alone."

Both Poe and Finn looked directly at each other after this response, looking worried. However, Poe did what he was told, closing the door behind him.

"Hello Finn," Leia said, trying to kill the tension. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine, I guess," Finn responded. However, his mind immediately raced to the next burning question he had. "Where's Rey?"

"I can't really go into detail on that with you at the moment," Leia said. "But I can tell you this. She is fine, but she's on a mission of her own right now. Hopefully, we'll hear back from her soon."

Finn nodded his head. He didn't seem entirely reassured but was optimistic nonetheless.

"Now, I have a question for you Finn," Leia said, her tone changing and becoming more emotional almost immediately. "You were there with my husband, and you saw my son." As she spoke, she only got more choked up, to where it was almost impossible to carry on, but she kept her heart moving. "What exactly happened?"

Finn could tell how much his answer meant to her, even before he answered. He wanted to tell her the truth, but worried that they would only make her feel worse. With little choice though, he had to tell her.

"When we executed our plan on Starkiller Base, we had everything planted when Kylo Ren approached. We were close to escaping but Han stayed behind. Rey and I could see them standing across from one another but the conversation was muffled from where we were." Finn took a deep breath and continued. "There seemed to be some sort of reconciliation between the two but it was a ploy, and Kylo killed him."

Leia sat down after hearing this, looking torn to pieces. While the death of her husband tore her up, the thought of it being her son that was the cause of it shredded every ounce of hope she had left of saving him from the choice he had made to join Snoke.

Finn merely stared at Leia as she sat in silence. He had no idea what to say to her now, so he remained quiet as she appeared to be contemplating with herself. Her eyes screamed of a person lost within the stars.

Finn's assumption was not far off as Leia felt as though every star in the galaxy that was her life had fallen. She fought with every fiber of her being not to be reduced to tears. She was perceived to be the strong general of the Resistance; the veteran who could withstand anything. She had to keep face and make sure that this was all that her crew saw of her.

"I am sorry, ma'am," Finn said quietly.

Leia nodded her head at this. Before anything else could be said between the two, the loud screech of the ships alarm sounded, deafening to the ears of anyone on the ship. The red, emergency lights blinking feverishly, alerting the crew that they had been found by the First Order.

Leia jumped to her feet, ready to leave the room and face whatever was out there, when something brought her to halt before she reached the door. She stood in place, she had felt a disturbance. Yet, it was not something that was a danger to the crew. It was a disturbance only meant for her.

She felt a familiar presence, one that she knew all too well. Her feelings told her what it was and she didn't know how to react to it.

Finn got up slowly as the alarm continued to sound. He walked to the door, but stared back at Leia, who continued to stand still, staring at the outer wall.

"Ma'am," Finn called out desperately. "Please, we have to go to the bridge."

Leia, hearing Finn, turned to stare at him, her expression full of emotion. "Go," she said. "I'll be behind you."

Finn stared at her with a level of disbelief. At that moment, Poe came into the room.

"The First Order must have found us," he said frantically. "What are your orders?"

Leia, still not entirely focused on them, answered quickly. "Tell Admiral Holdo to take command, I'll be there shortly."

"Ma'am, if I may," Poe started to say but Leia raised a hand to cut him off.

"No you may not," she said sternly. "Now go."

Poe and Finn both left the room, adhering to her orders.

She then closed the door behind them once they were out of sight, locking it. She stared again at the wall. Beyond the wall was the never-ending sea of stars that was the galaxy, but there was something else. She could feel it in her bones.

She closed her eyes, focused beyond the wall. Through the force she immediately knew who was there.

"Hello, son," she said through the force.

Sitting in his ship, aiming at the Medical Unit of the ship, ready to fire, was Kylo. His finger just hovering over the trigger.

"You know your anger won't erase who you really are," she continued.

"Don't lecture me," Kylo spitted. "I've endured enough of your lies. Yours and Uncle Luke's promise of hope. There is no hope in the light, only in darkness."

"Pride comes before the fall," Leia said. "Don't let this consume you. You may have taken away your father, my husband, but you will not take me away. I will always be with you."

"Not anymore," Kylo whispered.

"Well then, pull the trigger, see what happens," Leia responded. "My love for you will always burn, and will always be there with you, whether you like or not. It will only grow if you strike me down."

"More lies, lies of your love, you never loved me," Kylo said angrily.

"You always were defiant, but defiance won't lead you to the truth," Leia said.

"I know the truth," Kylo said. "I've known it for a very long time. I know who I am, I know my destiny, and I know what I have to do to reach it."

"Well than do it," she responded. "What are you waiting for?"

Kylo did nothing, he sat still, feeling blank inside. He knew his mission, but there was an inner conflict at war within himself, blinding him.

He closed his eyes, and through the force he saw his very own mother. She stood idly, staring at him, her expression mirroring his. He allowed himself this one last visual of his mother. He then closed himself off to her, cutting her away from seeing him.

He closed his eyes again, and with one last deep breath, he pressed his thumb to the trigger.

No longer able to see her son, she could now feel what was coming towards her. Time seemed to slow down around her. She stood straight, ready to welcome her fate. As slow as the shot took to reach her, death was even slower. She could see and feel the force of it rip the wall from the ship, but did not hear the noise. She felt mute to it.

The air suddenly dropped from the room and the exposed galaxy ripped her from that very room into the cold darkness of space. She looked out into the stars one finale time before welcoming the death of human body.

Still sitting in a stunned silence, with his eyes still closed, Kylo felt depleted. What he had just done felt as though it took almost all of his energy to accomplish. He put his hands over his face, contemplating everything that had transpired.

"You had to do it," he said to himself. "Now you are free."

As he said this, he felt a relief of sorts come over him. He now sat up, became refocused, opening his eyes.

He opened his eyes and immediately fell out of his chair in fear as the ghostly image of his mother stared eye to eye with him from outside the ship. Out of desperation, he looked and reached for his lightsaber, and when he looked back up, she was gone.

He looked around the ship in fear, searching every corner, but she did not appear again. He sat back down, trying his best to compose himself. He then did everything to convince himself that it was only his imagination. He could only hope that he was right.