The Face of Androgyny
The surroundings in the afterlife, ironically, have more life than that of the living world. Everything seems to be more dramatic and delicate, as if telling the souls that nothing can be more beautiful.
I'm so lonely. Kadaj lay on one of the benches in the church. A few other souls came to visit and bow before the sacrament. He got up and looked around. These were the memories of each and every soul when they were living. The Lifestream itself was a memory of the world wherein the every soul used to roam once, except that it was fat too peaceful. Somehow it crossed his mind that this was not meant for him. He laid again on his back.
A girl with freckles appeared in his vision, hovering above him. "Why are you so confused?"
"Huh?", he mumbled, staring back at the girl, her cheeks an ocean of freckles and red blush.
"Your thoughts are so strong, I can hear you from there!", she pointed to a bench at the far right corner.
"It's rude to listen to my thoughts, you know.", he sat up. The girl sat beside him. He noticed that she is carrying a white kitten.
"It's not my fault I heard you.", she answered. "At first I thought you were Aerith and I thought you were talking to me."
"Whatever."
"She speaks with everyone, just to see if they're ok. Don't act as if you know nothing about it! She speaks to you too, doesn't she?"
Suddenly the girl stood up from the bench in excitement. She clasped her hands together and looked thoughtfully at Kadaj.
"She's speaking to me now.", she closed her eyes, as if in prayer.
"Tch.", he let out a loud hiss, rolling his eyes. Let her talk. He too closed his eyes, but unlike hers, his was shot hardly… tightly. He brought up his hands and gripped on his head tight. With gritted teeth, he shooed what he knew was yet to come. The slightest sound of her voice irritated him. The grip on his head grew tighter. "Is she gone?!"
He opened up an eye, put down his hands before opening the other. The girl stared at him in fright. "You're weird. I'm going home!", she picked up her kitten and sped off.
So miserable. You little bitch. With another hiss he laid back on the bench before diving into a deep slumber.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
Tifa!
Tifa swore she heard this loudly and clearly from a soul. "Aerith..?", she replied. She could see nothingness, but light touched her form, and it began shining more and more, as if she was moving closer to it. Adorning the light, she raised up her arms to her face.
Her arms! They were healthy and unscarred. Her skin felt like the smoothness of marble. What happened to my disease? She asked herself all over and over again before it dawned upon her, where she was and why. I am a soul. A constant part of the Lifestream.
Tifa!
"Yes… I'm listening.", she almost whispered in reply. The ethereal, feminine voice surely belongs to her dear friend. "I've missed you. At least… we can be together now."
Open your eyes!
She obeyed, and saw what she never expected: she was in a road full of people with smiled etched on their faces. Some are old, some too young, but nevertheless amidst their differences, she could see what's similar among them. They are happy. Like a child warped into a fantasy world, she keeps on averting her gaze from one person to another. What's more heartwarming is—they smiled at her back. She took a few steps forward, a smile reaching her ears, tiptoeing to see the marvelous city before her. No machines… no reactors. This is so different from where I live.
Her excitement wore down a little upon realization. These are all souls. They are dead… and so am I.
Tears streamed down her face. Not that she hated the fact that she was already a soul, but because she knows that it will be too long before she could see her family— Marlene, Denzel, Cloud… and the rest of the gang. One by one, they will surely come. Time can only tell. As of now, she could only depend on building friendship among the dead to make the wait worthwhile. And with the company of Aerith, she won't be so lonely at all.
She walked forward. The afterlife is perfect. No wars and hatred. No pain. No pain….? With light fingers, she followed the trail of a tear that rolled down from her eye to her cheek.
The dead can still feel. They are still sensitive. The tear that fell off is a tear of pain—pain that her heart cannot deny. The pain of missing someone, wanting and yearning to see the glimpse of her beloved among the living.
But that is why she had to make friends in the afterlife. She needed someone, anybody, to make her feel at home. Through time she will get used to the new world and it would not be long before the rest of the group is reunited again.
A white kitten suddenly brushed its furry body onto her leg. Tifa looked down, surprised, and saw little feet beside it. She looked up and saw a freckled girl in a high ponytail.
"You must be her friend!"
"What?", Tifa asked with a smile. She bent down on her knees and made eye contact with the girl. Marlene…
"Aerith's!"
"Ah… yes. ", she replied. "Is that your kitty?"
The girl picked it up from Tifa's foot. "Welcome to the Lifestream."
Tifa nodded in gratitude. "Thanks. I'm Tifa."
"Crystal!", the girl said. "My house is over there,", she pointed to a nearby apartment. "But most of the time I play with Bambi inside the Church."
"There is a church?", Tifa sked. Crystal pointed to a building that looked like it was built in the Renaissance. She sped off with her kitten.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
Steps echoing, Tifa made her way at the center, in front of the sacrament. Her sigh was heard all over the place.
The church was empty and a bit lonely. She looked around. No one was there to pay a visit. Not even Crystal and her Bambi. That girl simply reminds her of Marlene, except that she looked a little sickly.
She sat down on one of the benches and began to sing a lullaby, a song that she sings to Marlene before she sleeps. She is a little too old for stories and lullabies, but she enjoyed listening to them, and Tifa enjoyed singing them anyway.
A creek was heard. Tifa stepped and turned around. A voice… I can hear a voice! … Aerith…? No… it's…
She turned around, surprised to meet eye to eye with a leather clad, svelte figure,. His face is androgynous. "Kadaj..?"
"Bright girl."
