They went to the library. There was tea laced with brandy. Jack drank while the Doctor talked.
"So Rose… isn't really dead," Jack said slowly.
The Doctor's eyes flicked to his, then looked sharply away. "No."
Jack nodded. "I'd hoped she wasn't… that somehow…"
The Doctor smiled. "A miracle had been worked? It was. Not by me. Got her dad to thank for that."
"So they're all in that other universe. And you couldn't-"
"Don't you think I wanted to?" The Doctor asked angrily. "Do you honestly think I wanted to leave her and her family and Mickey there? I burned up a bloody planet in a supernova just to be able to tell her good-bye, Captain: does that sound like a shrug-off to you?"
"No," Jack said quickly, quietly. "I'm sorry. I guess because…"
"Because what?" The Doctor demanded. "That you thought I'd abandoned you, so I abandoned her as well?"
"You didn't come back!" Jack exclaimed.
"I couldn't, Jack! I died! And then there was all that mess with the new body, the threat to Earth… and not long after that you weren't even on the Satellite anymore!" His voice lowered as he pushed himself off the sofa and advanced on Jack. "Were you," he whispered.
Jack looked uneasy.
"You rode a rift back here," the Doctor went on. "You know how bloody dangerous that is."
"I was alone. I was desperate," Jack said tightly.
"I'm not knocking you for wanting to leave. But you took a big gamble, Captain. And there were consequences you haven't even had to consider yet. And I hope you never do."
Jack glanced down, feeling oddly chastened.
"And then you joined Torchwood."
"Yes."
"Why?"
Jack exhaled slowly. "At first, it was because it was my best chance of getting back to you."
The Doctor nodded, unsurprised. "And then?"
Jack shrugged. "The Earth needs help. Since you don't stick around, someone has to do it, now don't they."
Now it was the Doctor's turn to feel guilt. "I can't-"
"Bullshit," Jack retorted. "You mean you won't. And believe me, I understand that. All I'm saying is, don't condemn my decisions."
"People in glass houses, eh?" the Doctor smiled.
Jack couldn't help but return the smile. "Something like that."
An uneasy silence descended for a moment before the Doctor said: "I think it's your turn to tell me a story, don't you?"
