With Or Without You -Longer Version

As those of you who requested it know, this is the chapter version of the songfic. It starts when Buffy left to tell Faith her realization, will have parts of the song and possibly another song in it. If you don't like stories with lesbians or gay peoples, then kindly piss off and go read a conservative pamphlet. Everything Buffy is Joss Whedons, the songs are works of Dope. Yes that is a band. R&R, flame, whatever. At least I know you read it.

Chapter One

I'll do my time and I won't argue
A broken glass a portrait of you
I play on keys barely in tune
Forget the reasons I won't resume-

I'm still staring out that window. I can feel her more clearly, even the little emotions. Right now...right now she's just had a realization, and I think she's coming to tell me, as the connection is getting larger. Apparently the more we get to know each other, the deeper and more mature the connection gets. Angel visits too, and I think he can tell that I want her. He does that whole "mysterious-enigmatic-cryptic-smile" thing that royally annoys the living fuck out of me. Anyways, he doesn't try to rip my face off or anything, so I think he's okay with it, I'm not sure. I know he still has feelings for Buffy, but with Cordelia...hey, I'm just sayin'. It's not much, but it could grow, you know what I mean? Today another prisoner snuck some smokes into the cells...my first in a hell of a long time. It calmed me down, and it felt a little like the old me. Fearless, bad-ass rebel Faith. Pre-first human killed. I feel the connection come closer until it feels like fucking fire four centimeters from my face. But in a good way. If you get me.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'm at the jail house, the warden looks up and smiles as he recognizes me. He's really nice, he gave me a donut a few months ago...too bad he's got such a crappy job, he'd make a superb grandpa to someone. He gives me another warm smile as the female guard comes for me. She gives me a once over, looks me square in the eyes, and grunts. She's one of those people.

"You're here for Faith, yeah?" and she has mega-smokers voice. Not like Faiths, which is husky in a sexy way. I nod, and she grunts again, opens a gate and I walk through. There are the familiar little cubes divided by planks of puke-grey plastic, with the little black phones on the side. I sit, and tap the little ledge on my side. I wipe my now-sweating hands on my pants -ew- I start tapping again. How long does it take to get a prisoner out and to the talking areas, anyways? The big slayer mojo connection is burning me up inside, and I'm getting supremely nervous. Where the hell is she? Is she walking slower than a snail or something? I'm about to start chewing my nails when the door opens and she walks in, orange suit on and smiling. I've never seen her smile. Smirk, yes, but never a real smile. Despite all those cigarettes she's smoked, her teeth are white. Her hair's beautiful as ever, I really do hope that she'll keep it that way when she gets out. She sits down and takes the phone.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hey B, what's happening?" I ask, trying to keep my smokers voice under control. She gives me a look and smiles a tiny, tiny smile.

"Not much, Riley's been going off more and more at night to 'eliminate the hostiles,' as he puts it. Willow and Tara are living together now, Xander and Anya have their own apartment, and Giles is...well, Giles has been...OH! He has a new car." she pauses for a moment, thinking. "It's a BMW, and it's red." I just stare and nod. The connection's getting too fucking distracting, and I can see she feels it too. It feels like...well the best way to describe it would be intense sexual tension, but lets not get ahead of ourselves, shall we?

"Sounds pretty rad B." smirk. I like to smirk, I can't help it, it's a natural reaction to amusing news. Or news in general. She gives an uncomfortable smile, and I sense the serious shift in her demeanor. She looks at me and clears her throat a little too loudly.

"Um, Faith? The...connection, it's a little funky. And it's not bad funky, it's just weird, because I can feel it now and it's really intense. What the hell's happening? It's very confusing and weird and strange and I think it's kind of nice but it weirds me out!" I'm very quiet, letting her release it all, taking it in and comparing it with my feelings. You wouldn't think it, but I'm a good listener and sort of intelligent when it comes to confusing. But this is over my head. I swallow, lick my lips and let her go on. I could let her go on and on and on and on and on until I was just a skeleton. The way she's going on, that's probably going to happen.

"...and then, I feel this huge feeling of happiness, and do you KNOW how distracting that is when you're fighting Dracula? I'm so confused and you're just looking at me like I'm crazy but I'm not I swear and I'm going to find out why this is and I think I might be falling in love with you but I'm not sure of that either and my sister's being a pest and totally ruining my life..."

Did I just hear what I think (and hope) I heard? Holy shit I think I did. Wow.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'm just rambling on, and I think she got my disguised comment, cuz the connection just shifted ever so little. Maybe she's doing that thing where she hides all her emotions...nope, that priceless look of confusion mixed with shock and I think a little bit of happiness is forming. Note to self: have camera to capture that look.

"So, Faith, how's life?" I finish. She snaps out of it. Damn, it was SO darn-tootin' cute!

"I-uh...ummm..." Smokers voice coming through. Must be cuz she's nervous. Oh, now SHE'S starting to babble. I love it! Wait, better tune in:

"...So I kick that puta in the face, and she totally grabs my hair. But I've already prepared, and so she's on the floor in three seconds flat! Then the guards came. Life's been kind of boring cuz of all the same stuff we do, but I mostly look out the window and daydream about being outside, with you cuz I think I'm kinda falling for you too. Redemption's so hard, no wonder Angel's been at it so long and is such a dark one, it's so damn BORING!!!" she says.

Oh boy, did she just cleverly disguise that confession? Clever Faith, she DID! Wow, must be a skill we both share and- wait, what the fuck am I thinking?! She just said she's falling for me. Oh wow, oh wow...oh WOW...

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Both Slayers returned to their respective abodes (the Summers home, cell block 288C) with numb happiness: they just spat out their worst, yet least hidden secret to each other. Oh, think of what the next visit might bring...

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

How cliche of me to put "their worst, yet least hidden secret." oh well. The next chapter's gonna be coming soon. I have NOTHING to do this weekend, so yeah. Oh, I got my hair straightened, too. It looks pretty rad.

Peace,

Shorty