Title: Not Done Hurting

Author: Half-Human

Summary: What happens when Derek finally confronts a hurt Addie? (ADDEK)

Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy and all its wonderful characters belong to the genius Shonda Rhimes and everyone who's helped put this drama together. Law and Order: SVU and all its characters also aren't mine…unfortunately.

Author's Note: Sorry for the long wait. I had to tackle writer's block and had like no time to do it. Sucked.

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As Derek pushed open the door to Addison's room, his heart raced and his palms started sweating. He stepped in and there she was, right in front of him. Derek could hear the protests of Weiss and Savy, but his focus remained on Addison. She lay in bed, her head bandaged, her eyes droopy, and her face marred by a dark maroon bruise.

"Addie," he whispered stepping forward. Weiss suddenly stepped in front of Derek and blocked his view of Addison.

"Derek! What's wrong with you man? What did I tell you before?" Derek frowned at his old friend and clenched his fists. Savy quickly pulled Weiss aside and both headed out of the small room.

"Addie," Derek continued his journey. He walked to her bedside and sought her hand, but Addison quickly moved her wrist and averted his gaze. "Addie, please." Addison had her faced turned away from Derek. She stared at something Derek could not comprehend. "Addie," Derek proceeded to gently place the backside of his hand on her bruise. His insides cringed. He never saw Addie with such an injury. Addison seemed to shy away from his touch.

"What do you want?" She finally asked bitterly. The two locked eyes. Derek noticed that Addie had been crying and that something was gone, a kind of flare that she always had. Her eyes showed a deep loss, as if that spark he'd grown to love had slowly flickered away after countless storms of heavy rain. Addison was not defeated, but she was somehow damaged. Derek stared into her eyes and desperately tried to reclaim what was once his—her warmth, trust, love.

Nothing, Addison's eyes held nothing for him.

"Addie…I've been so worried," was all Derek managed to say. Addison was the first to break the gaze between the two. She shook her head and frowned.

"So," she said, smirking and trying to suppress tears, "happy with what you see?" Derek was caught off guard by her question. "Well? Are you?" Addison asked again, wondering if Derek was finally content with seeing her at her worse.

"Addie, I don't know what you are talking about, but I've been wanting to talk with you for so long. I've wanted to hold you for so long. Addison, I miss you so much. I love you. I never stopped loving you. I was a jerk, a dick, a Mr. McAss-hole. I didn't realize how much you meant to me until you left."

"Bullshit. You never cared. You just kept chasing after that woman, ignoring the one in front of you."

"You are right, I was indifferent and I was inconsiderate. And yes, I was thinking of Meredith when we were having sex, but it was a mistake, and I don't know what got into me. I was a loser. I was so ignorant, I didn't see you, I was blinded by stupidity, but now I know. Now I see and-"

"See what Derek? Now you see. Now you fucking see me," Addie was yelling now, "after I've been attacked, abused…almost raped." Addie found it hard to control her tears. "Nice time to have an epiphany. You're full of it Derek. You're fucking full of it!" Addie inhaled deeply, trying to rein her emotions. 'He only came because he found out I was hurt,' she thought solemnly. "You wanted me to hurt, you fucking bastard. Do you like what you see?" Addie locked eyes with man in front of her, desperately shunning the feelings of longing that spurred within her. She hated him for seeing her broken, and as they looked into each other's eyes, she never felt to vulnerable in her life.

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"No. Addie, please," Derek managed to say, "you can call me all you want but I am not lying to you now. I wish you never left. I wish I were with you that night…I wish I could have protected you. Addie-"

"I don't need you're protection! I don't need you." Addie yelled, her quivering voice betraying her words' intentions.

"Addie, I'm so sorry…" Derek muttered, his face reddening, eyes watering. It was then that Addison noticed how wrecked Derek looked. His hair was everywhere, tousled and tangled. He looked like he hadn't shaved in days. His shirt was wrinkled, his eyes were rimmed with dark circles, and his lips were dry—chapped. "Addison. Please. Forgive me," he said, now letting his tears stream down his cheeks. He firmly grasped one of Addison's hands with both of his and bent down on his knees. "Please," he muttered, spittle dripping down his chin. He was crying.

"Don't," Addison began, feeling her anger waiver. "Please, stop. Derek, just stop," she pleaded. She felt the wall she had built between Derek and her begin to crumble. "Please," she whispered, tears falling down her cheek. She didn't even think she could cry more.

"Addison," Derek called between sobs. Addison wasn't sure what to do. She had told herself that she wanted nothing to do with Derek; she had preached about her independence, she had kept herself on top of her game. She was Addison. She had no weaknesses. 'Yes,' she always told herself, 'I can live with out him,' but at that moment, she knew it was all a lie. Derek was her weakness. Derek was the one that could truly tear her apart. He was the one that could make and break her. She hated the idea, but it was true. 'Can I forgive him?' she wondered. 'How could I?' She lay there, thinking about her situation. She felt so lost, abandoned, and puzzled on top of the grave feelings of being violated, used, and aggressively abused.

Not sure what to do, Addie cried silently, joining the man that knelt at her bedside. 'What do I do?' she questioned, feeling the squeeze of Derek's hands on hers.

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kk, enough for now. Sorry for the grim ending. What do yall think? Plz R/R!

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GO TEAM ADDIE!

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