"hahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahaha-You're hahah tellin' me hehe that ha the he great ice frosted cubodic cubular cube of the greatest iciest cubies in the world actually got a ruler and measured himself? Hahahahaha"
"No"
"Oh"
"My Dad did"
Neji: Is there something you need to tell us Sasuke, we will still be you friend no matter what happens, through sickness and health, for better or-
Slap
Tenten:You don't love me wail it's so blatant, why did I not see it before? You distant good looks, your offhand remarks, you never paid any attention to me, I now know why. I mean it shoulda been obvious when you never looked at any porn or naked women. Oh God Neji—
Neji: yells are you saying that because I will not lower myself to look at porn I'm gay?? Fine I will look at porn.
Wail moan wail
Tenten: Oh my God Neji you look at porn!! How degrading, do you know that really offends me?? I will never talk to again.
Runs off wailing
Neji: Tenten wait-
Runs after her
Sakura:whoa, all that from the size off weenies
Naruto: Hey Sasuke, did you dad really measure you weenie?
Sasuke: Of course, why do you think I was so upset? That's one of the reason Itachi killed everyone.
Uhm…………
Sasuke: You know. Coz' my dad only had time to measure one off us, so my mum had to measure my brothers.
Naruto: And that was because…………..?
Sasuke: Well for some reason mum always use to moan and wiggle for some reason.
Silence
Light bulb goes on somewhere.
Sakura: hey, sasi, do you know why you mother twitched……..you know………………why she really twitched….?
Sasuke: Of course
Relieved sigh
Sasuke: She had mental problems.
Crap
Sakura: Didn't anyone tell you about…you know…loving other people?
Sasuke: My dad of course. He said don't do it.
Sakura: But what about when you go older, didn't anyone ever tell you anything about a loving happy relationship.
Sasuke: Everyone was dead
Awkward pause.
Sakura: Er...well….how about you come over to my place later and I'll...umm…explain everything in detail?
Sasuke: Hn
Sakura: Great. Come around seven.
Naruto: what about me?
Sakura: Sorry I don't do threesomes, and you Ramen will get cold.
Naruto: mmmmmm…..Ramen, she waits for me forever.
Sakura: You know Naruto, I'm surprised you aren't damaged permanently; don't you eat anything but ramen? Actually, as a medic-nin I'm going to have to say, that you are not aloud to eat any more Ramen for the sake of you physical and mental health.
Naruto: No-no-no R-r-r-r-a-a-a-a-a-a-n-n-n-no-o-o-o-r-r-r-r-r-r-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Sasuke: Oh shut up dobe
Naruto: sticks his tongue out well how would you like it if your lifeline was suddenly taken away from you hmm?? In fact you probably don't have a life-evil grin-oh wait. You do. Mwhahahahahahahhahha. I will revenge you my ramen.
Sasuke: Err…I wasn't the one who took it away from you…..and anyway, I don't have a 'lifeline'.
Naruto: hehehehe hahahahah hehehehe haha.
Slap
Sakura: My God he's lost it!
Naruto: Oh yes you do Sasuke. Tomatoes. Yes my precious, he likes them, we shall gets he we shall. Down wiv ze hobbit. Tricks them we shall. Snicker snicker snicker
Pause.
Sasuke: How did you find out about that?? It was a secret, nobody should know, for that you will die.
Naruto: Er Sasuke, you basically only eat tomato soup. Anyway, that's not the reason you going to kill me, duh, even I know your going to kill me so you can get the new type of Sharingan: The way to dark and good lookin' sexy little bad boy type of sharingan.
Pause. eh?
Sakura: It's called Mangekyo sharingan or something stupid like that, you know something how the hell are we suppose to pronounce crap like that? I mean it's the same with the bloody jutsus, I would be way ahead of you guys except I can't actually say the words!! Hahahaha, I just make them up. Thoughtfully to herself-I think that's why Naruto peanuts are so nutless!
Naruto: WHAT?? Is that why I can't make babies?? I mean I've tried so many times and nothing has happened. This is why?? THIS MEANS NO ONE WILL EXPERIENCE THE JOYS OF NARUTO UZUMAKI!!
Sakura: Who exactly are you doing it with?.
Naruto: You!
Sasuke: What?? Sakura how could you?? I thought you were still pure as the driven snow after somebody backed a oil truck through it?
Sweat drop
Sakura: Naruto…..trust me, if I had been sleeping with you I would have known it. So It obviously wasn't the real me.
Naruto: Of course it wasn't. It was a picture I found with Lee, he let me borrow it for a while. You know as friends. I have been trying to make you pregnant for ages, but the stalk never brought me a bubble-gum eyed green haired baby.
Eh?
Sakura: That doesn't work any more Naruto. And if you shout one more time, I will castrate you. Comprende?
Nod Nod
Sakura: I don't see why you're nodding Sasuke-you'd never shout even if a weird alien mutant freak started fondling you.
Sasuke: Actually I did.
Pause
Sasuke: Then it was okay. It was only my brother.
Sakura: Oh that's o-eh?
