Chapter 3
A/N: Good news! another chapter and the long awaited letter! Thanks for all the reviews, they make me happy. Sorry for any errors in this chapter. I just had knee surgery and am a little tired so I may have missed a few things. let me know if you see any typos or other errors, I will gladly fix them.
Enjoy!
Chapter 3
Colonel Benjamin Sheppard, retired, was a proud man who hated to admit when he was in the wrong. Over the years though, he had come to see that there were several things he could have handled differently. Chief among them was his son, John Sheppard.
John's mother died when he was twelve and the young boy had tried to seek comfort from his only living parent. Ben was devastated by his wife's death and took his grief and anger out on his son who looked so much like his beloved Mary. John in turn started to blame his father for his mother's death.
John's teenage years were hell for both Sheppard men and as soon as John graduated high school, he was off to the Air Force Academy and hadn't been home since. Ben didn't even show up for his sons disciplinary hearing after the fiasco in Afghanistan, he was to ashamed, mad at his son but worried at the same time. Last he heard, John was headed for Antarctica.
It was Sunday morning and Ben was sitting at the kitchen counter working on the New York Times crossword and drinking his coffee when the doorbell rang. He frowned for a moment, wondering who would be ringing his bell this early on a Sunday.
He paled as he opened the door. A man in the uniform of an Air Force General stood on the other side, looking out at the road..
Oh no, not John. Was his first thought. I'm sorry Mary, was his second. Was this how Mary felt as she waited at home for him when he was deployed? Dreading the day an officer would show up on her doorstep, leaving her a widow and their young son fatherless? Not that he was much of a father to John any way.
He gathered himself before he opened the outer glass door. "May I help you Sir?" He may be retired but he was still a military man at hart.
"Are you Colonel Benjamin Sheppard?" the man asked.
"Yes," Ben swallowed, stealing himself for bad news.
The man looked at him strangely for a second before his eyes went wide. "I'm sorry, I forgot what this must look like. He's not dead, at least not since I last heard. And there I go again, maybe I'll just shut up now."
Ben felt relief wash over him and had to lean against the door frame to keep from collapsing. He took a second before to process what the General had told him. "If you're not here to deliver bad news then may I ask why you are here?"
"I am here to deliver a letter that your son sent home for you."
It was Ben's turn to look at the General strangely. "They have two stars playing messenger these days?"
"No. I volunteered. One of the perks of being a General is that, for the most part, you can do what you want. May I come in?"
Ben blinked before replying, "Of course General…"
"O'Neill, Jack O'Neill."
A short time later coffee had been offered and excepted and the two men sat down in the living room.
"May I ask why a two star General wanted to deliver a letter from my son personally?"
"You may. I guess I was curios. I like the kid. Kinda wanted to see where he got it from."
"Where he got it from? Should I be worried?"
"I don't think so," Jack said with a laugh. "He is a wonderful leader, his men respect him. Hell, I respect him. From the reports we receive he's doing a wonderful job."
"In Antarctica?"
"Not any more. He was transferred about two years ago."
"Where is he now?"
"I'm afraid I can't tell you that. It's classified."
"I still have clearance," Ben frowned.
"Not for this you don't. I guess since you didn't know he transferred you don't know about his promotion either."
"Promotion?"
"Yes. He's now Lt. Colonel John Sheppard," Jack watched as a proud smile spread across the retired Colonels face.
"Is there anything else you can tell me?"
"I believe almost everything you'd want to know is in this letter," Jack said as he retrieved it from his inner jacket pocket and handed it to Ben Sheppard. "I'm sorry but we had to read it, make sure he wasn't writing things he shouldn't be."
"I understand."
"You should be proud of you boy," Jack said. "He is the Military Commander of the base he is stationed at, second only to the civilian leader. It's a joint civilian/military thing and I hear good things about him from both. He was only promoted a year ago but after his commanding officer died within the first few days there, he was the ranking officer. They are in a very remote area and they were cut off for the first year. We now have regular supply runs so we hear a lot more from them."
"It's dangerous? What he's doing?"
"Yes, it can be. Your son is a survivor though."
Ben Sheppard nodded thoughtfully, eyes on the letter in his hands.
He looked up as General O'Neill stood. "It was nice meeting you Colonel Sheppard. I'll let you get on with your letter. Jack handed the man his business card. "The address you can send stuff to him is on the back. Just keep in mind that it might be a month or more before he receives it. I hear he tries to requisition football games on DVD."
Ben let out a laugh. "I bet he does. Football was one of the few things we could agree on after his mother died. Does he get email?"
"Yes. I'm afraid I don't know his address off the top of my head though. Oh by the way. The next supply run leaves on Friday. If you mail whatever your sending so it gets to Colorado by then he should get it relatively soon."
After seeing General O'Neill out Ben returned to the living room. He sat and stared at the latter for several minute. It was addressed: 'Colonel Benjamin Sheppard' with no street address. Stealing himself he opened the letter and began to read.
Dear Dad,
I know we parted on bad terms and you probably thought you'd never hear from me again, but I just wanted to… I don't really know why I am writing this letter… to prove that I'm not such a screw up? That I have friends who trust me, who are practically like family? I don't know. Maybe I just wanted you to know how I'm doing.
I'm doing good. I can't tell you where I'm currently stationed because it is highly classified but I can tell you I made Lt. Colonel. (Bet you never thought that would happen. Truth is neither did I, especially after Afghanistan.)
I am the military commander here and second in command over all. This expedition is a largely scientific one so there are lots of civilian scientist running all over the place. (There are several I'd like to shoot, especially when their scientific curiosity puts the whole expedition in jeopardy, but my boss wont let me.)
So far his son hadn't really told him anything different than what General O'Neill had said.
I've got some of the best men and women under my command. They know what is required to get the job done and they put their lives on the line daily to protect the people on this base and at home. I would trust my life to any of them and I know that they trust their lives to me as well. They know I trust their instincts and skills and that if they do get into trouble that I will do everything possible to bring them home safe.
Some of the scientists aren't so bad either. Somehow the lead scientist and I have become pretty good friends… I save his life, he saves mine. I insult him, he insults me. As annoying as Rodney can be, he really is a good friend where it counts. His second in command, Zelenka is not that bad either and occasionally puts Rodney in his place when his ego gets to big. Not that that is easy. Rodney is a genius and more often that not he is right. Just don't tell him I said that.
Dr. Weir, my boss, and I have also become friends of a sort. How could we not. After being isolated for a year, watching friends and comrades die and have to make the hard decisions… As crazy as it sounds, we depend on each other to run this base. I would not be where I am today if not for Dr. Weir. Not to say that we don't have our disagreements. Especially when it comes to how best protect the people on this base. After a few miss starts we have come to an agreement and even if she doesn't agree she will listen to me and we usually come to a compromise.
Our
CMO, Dr. Beckett has also become a very good friend. And he has put
me back together more times than I am willing to admit. He is a
mother-hen. Always making sure I eat and get enough sleep.So don't worry Dad, I am being well cared for.
We have also made friends with some of the locals. Teyla and Ronon have both been teaching me their peoples traditional fighting styles and both offer a perspective that we sometimes tend to overlook.
When we first headed out on this expedition we were unsure if we would ever see our loved ones again, and as I said, for the first year we were totally cut off. We have regular supply runs now and send home weekly reports. Though none of us really get much of a chance to come home. Not many of us want to go home truthfully. This base has become home. These people family. Sure, most everyone has left someone back home, but we are on the adventure of a lifetime. None of us would give it up willingly.
I know you are trying to figure out where we could be that is so dangerous and remote, where the military and civilians are working side by side. Stop, you'll hurt yourself trying to guess. I just want you to know that we are doing good, important work here. I hope that someday people, that you, will know what we are doing and what we have sacrificed to keep our loved ones safe.
I guess the real reason I am writing this letter is because there are some things I needed to say, or at least get down on paper, before one of us dies. I have enough regrets as is. So in case I never make it home I want you to know that I do love you Dad and I am sorry about everything. I wish we hadn't grown apart. Mom would be so mad at us if she could see us now. Maybe...
Sorry, I have to cut this short, some of my people are under fire and stranded. I hope I get a chance to see you again some day.
Love, your son,
Lt. Colonel John Sheppard.
It took Ben several minutes after he finished reading the letter to realize that he had tears running down his face. The abrupt end to the letter had him slightly rattled. It looked like John had scribbled the last several lines as he ran out the door.
Please,he prayed please keep my son safe and bring him home in one piece. I would really love a chance to see him again.
After a few more minutes of contemplation Ben Sheppard stood up with renewed determination. He went off to search for some paper, a pen and envelope. Did he even have any stamps around? He'd have to buy one at the post office.
