See me safely through the night

Bobby Goren woke up suddenly. He felt like he was suffocating, he couldn't breathe. He could feel the cold sweat of panic on his forehead, his limbs felt heavy, his body was sore, his lungs were empty.

"Bobby." It was Lucy's voice, Lucy's hand on his forehead, pressing him gently back against the bed. He could hear monitors beeping, alarms sounding. He needed to breathe. "Shhh…." Lucy said, her voice soft, her hands putting a gentle pressure against him, trying to get him to lay back. She was raising the bed to more of an incline so he wasn't lying flat out. It was dawn, he could see out the hospital window that the sun was beginning to kiss the sky.

"I can't breathe." He gasped, the pain in his ribs preventing him from breathing in. He watched Lucy click the pain medication button.

"Slowly, you need to breathe. You need to try to fill your lungs. I know it hurts." She said, taking a cold cloth to his sweaty forehead. "Close your eyes, listen to my voice, breathe in slowly, steadily, slowly, I know it hurts, slowly, steadily." He listened to her voice, softly repeating the words, her hand pressing the cold cloth to his forehead, her other hand holding his hand. He kept eyes closed and breathed in slowly, steadily. It hurt like hell. "Good, that's good." Lucy was saying. He opened his eyes to look at her.

"Were you here all night?" He asked.

"Not all night. Eames stayed a while. When they kicked her out, she called me, and I came over about an hour ago." Lucy took the cold cloth away from his forehead. He was leaning back against the bed which was now on an incline. He was partially sitting up, so he was in a bit less pain.

"I guess I made it through the night." He said, starting to feel fuzzy from the medication Lucy had pushed into his IV.

"Did you think you wouldn't?" Lucy asked, placing a fresh cool cloth on his head, offering him some water to drink.

"I don't know." His words sounded foreign to him, thick, almost unpronounceable.

"Bobby…" He could tell by her tone that she wanted to say something, but he couldn't focus on her, he tried to look at her, and think about what she might want to say. Usually he just kind of knew what she was thinking without her actually saying anything. Lucy wore her heart on her sleeve, and Bobby knew her well enough to know her moods. But this time, he couldn't tell. His vision was a little blurry, he couldn't make out the expression in her eyes, the set of her mouth. He reached out clumsily, touching a curl of her hair, pulling it straight, watching it spring back. He loved that, he loved her hair, the feel of her hair in his fingers. He could see her smile.

"Safely through the night, that's what you said, right?" He said, his words running together.

"Bobby..." Her tone was light, he could imagine her next words, you're a mess, meant to tease him about how the pain meds were affecting him. But he couldn't help but think, she was right, he was a mess, he was just beginning to recognize exactly how much of a mess he had let his life become.

"Lucy." He said her name, but his voice didn't sound like his own. He realized, that in part, it wasn't his own, Logan had walked into the room and had said her name as well. Bobby watched as Logan hugged her lightly, kissed her cheek.

"I'll, um, I'll just be right back." Bobby heard Lucy say and watched her leave the room.

"So you get hit by a truck, and you come out with only some cracked ribs." Logan turned to face Bobby. "Pretty incredible really, though also incredibly painful." Bobby watched Logan turn, his eyes looking out into the hallway at Lucy. "Before you go charging in and messing up her life, you need to get a hold of your own." Logan said. Bobby looked at him, scowling a bit.

"What?" Bobby said, his voice still thick, his brain a bit slow.

"I see that way you look at her when she's not looking." Logan looked at Bobby. "Before you get into her life, get a hold of your own." Logan repeated, not angrily, his tone was neural, observant. Bobby shook him off, looked out the window. "Anyway, just wanted to see with my own eyes that you made it through the night." Logan said turning to go.

"What's with that?" Bobby said, his words still slurred.

"With what?" Logan paused.

"Making it through the night…" Bobby repeated the phrase.

"Just an expression." Logan shrugged, not knowing about the prayer Lucy had recited.

"Yeah." Bobby said thickly, thinking it was just an expression until you found yourself actually living that way.

"Later Goren." Logan said, and Bobby watched him walk out of the room. Bobby closed his eyes and thought about Logan's words about not messing with Lucy's life until he could figure out his own. Bobby realized that his heart might be hurting worse than his ribs, which was saying a lot.


A/N: Thanks for reading. Maybe soon we will actually be watching new LOCI epis again :)