Chapter 6: Oh yeah, there ARE other ninjas in Konoha! Hinata and the others.

"YAAAAY! Sausuke's back, Sasuke's back, Sasuke's back and Lee's on crack…" sang Naruto, as he headed to Ichiraku's ramen shop. When he finally made it, he found Hinata, Lee, and Neji already eating there.

"Hey guys! Guess who JUST BROUGHT SASUKE BACK!?!?!?" yelled Naruto.

Neji looked shocked. Lee swore, he had just lost five dollars. Hinata said, "Yay! I knew you could do it, Naruto!"

Lee sighed as he gave Naruto five dollars. Neji nudged Hinata. "C'mon Hinata. You can talk to him."

"But Neji," began Hinata "What if he refuses me?"

"Listen, when you said that you'd press charges against me for trying to kill you, and when it turned out I couldn't afford a lawyer, I said I'd help you with whatever you want. You wanted me to help you with this. Beating Naruto to a pulp is our last resort! You have to do this first!"

Hinata nodded. Turning to Naruto, she said, "Naruto, would you like to umm...go out sometime?"

Naruto promptly said, "Hinata, I'm not gay."

Hinata looked puzzled. Neji sighed. Oh well, he thought, time for the last resort. "Naruto, can I talk to you alone for a sec?"

"I JUST told you I'm not gay!" A vein burst in Neji's head, and he kicked Naruto in the balls, sending him back twenty feet.

"GARRRRGH! WHAT THE FUCK!" Screamed Naruto.

"Listen, idiot, Hinata likes you! Go on a date with her or I'll fucking CRUSH you!"

"But I'm not…wait…Hinata's a guy, right?"

Neji, shocked that somebody could be so stupid, started yelling at Naruto again.

"NO SHE'S A GIRL!And she fucking LOVES you!"

"WHAT!?!?!?"

"Okay, dumbass. You've got twenty-four hours to think about this, and if you refuse Hinata, I'll beat you up and take your ramen."

"NOOO! I like ramen!"

As Neji left, Naruto began to think. He decided this was beyond his own mental abilities, so he talked to the Kyuubi about it.

"Hey Kyuubi."

"HELLO MORTAL WHELP. DO YOU NEED POWER AGAIN? OKAY, HERE YOU GO!"

Naruto involuntarily accepted the Kyuubi's power and blew up a house. After he made it to his hideout he resumed his conversation.

"WTF!?!? I didn't ask for power! Are you stupid?"

"WATCH YOUR TONE, KIT. I COULD KICK YOUR ASS IF IT WEREN'T FOR THE CAGE."

"Yeah, but because of the cage, I'm safe. See?" Naruto mooned the Kyuubi, than sat down. The Kyuubi roared at him and tried to eat him, but couldn't.

"KIT, I FUCKING HATE YOU! WHAT DO YOU NEED? TELL ME, SO YOU CAN LEAVE SOONER!"

"Well, it turns out Hinata's a girl, and she likes me, and I can't choose between her and Sakura."

"WELL, I LIKE WHATEVER MAKES YOU MORE MISERABLE, SO GO WITH SAKURA. ALTHOUGH, BECAUSE THIS CHAPTER IS PRETTY SHORT, WE SHOULD DO A PRO-CON CHART."

So Naruto and the Kyuubi made a pro-con chart.

Hinata:

Pros:

Nice to me

Believes in me

Likes me

For my birthday, gave me a ramen-themed party and gave me a puppy, Jimmython

If I date her, Neji won't take my ramen

Cons:

Shy

Her dad might hate me

Weird teammates

Not Sakura

Sakura:

Pros:

Sakura

Cons:

Mean to me

Hates me (and tells me every day)

Thinks I suck

Threw me a birthday party where she beat me, made me eat my silverware, and punched me in the groin for every hour I'd been alive. Her present was killing Jimmython

If I date her, Neji will take my ramen

"ARRGH! Who do I choose?!?!?" said Naruto angrily. "What do you think, Hinata?"

Hinata, who was spying on Naruto through the window, freaked out and fell in his house.

"Umm, uhh, er, uh, ah…" Said Hinata, who was too freaked out to speak legibly.

"Wait! I know!" Said Naruto. "I'll tell each one I like them, and see how they react!"

Naruto turned to Hinata. "Hinata, I like you."

"REALLY?!" Said Hinata. She promptly grabbed Naruto, and started making out with him.

---Lemon---

Naruto and Hinata did some stuff. Than they did some other stuff. Than they took off their clothes. Than they did some more stuff. Than they were done.

---End Lemon---

Hinata turned to Naruto. "Naruto, aren't you going to ask Sakura if she likes you?"

Naruto turned to Hinata and said, "You know what? I don't feel like being beaten right now."

Both of them giggled, and fell asleep in their lovers arms. AWWWW!

Next: Chapter Seven: Deer Can Bite?!?!? The hunt for the head begins!

AU: thanks for your reviews and patience!!!!