Morning Conversations

I hope everyone is happy. I'm officially leaving homework undone to write this. I can't help myself. I've become a review junkie. So here goes. Part 2 of Chapter 14: The Cullens in Edward's POV.

Disclaimer: Me? Own Twilight? Um, no. I can't even claim to have a Mike in my life, much less that I own Edward. I'm just having a little fun. And hoping others enjoy the product of my obsession.

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"What would you say to meeting my family?"

Her eyes met mine as I finished speaking. There was something in her eyes… "Are you afraid now?" I asked. I wanted her to be afraid, because she would be safe, were she afraid. And yet… and yet knowing that she was felt like someone had stuck a knife in my chest.

"Yes."

I couldn't stand the thought that I'd frightened her. "Don't worry," I teased, trying to lighten the mood. "I'll protect you." I would do it, too. Even though I was the creature from whom she needed the most protection. I was amazed at how desensitized I had grown to her scent, but I knew the monster still lurked just below the surface. Waiting for my control to slip.

And then she shocked me again. "I'm not afraid of them," she insisted, "I'm afraid they won't… like me. Won't they be, well, surprised that you would bring someone… like me… home to meet them? Do they know that I know about them?"

"Oh, they already know everything." I was lucky to still exist at this moment. Rosalie had nearly killed me the night I saved Bella in Port Angeles. The night I told Bella my -our- secrets. "They'd taken bets yesterday, you know--" I forced a smile, trying to keep my voice steady, "on whether I'd bring you back, though why anyone would bet against Alice, I can't imagine. At any rate," I continued, "we don't have secrets in the family. It's not really feasible, what with my mind reading and Alice seeing the future and all that." Not to mention our enhanced senses. It was literally impossible to keep anything secret in our house.

"And Jasper making you feel all warm and fuzzy about spilling your guts, don't forget that," she teased.

"You paid attention," I smiled. She amazed me more with every moment I spent with her. She confused me more with every moment I spent with her. I couldn't make up my mind about what I wanted. I wanted her to leave me, and yet I couldn't stand the thought that she might. I wanted to be close to her, but I knew that I could hurt her. Why was it so difficult to stay away from her?

"I've been known to do that every now and then," she said with a frown. "So did Alice see me coming?"

"Something like that," I squirmed uncomfortably, looking away so that she couldn't see my eyes. If she saw my eyes, she would probably see that I was keeping something from her. I didn't want to tell Bella that Alice had seen her as one of us. Knowing Bella, she would think that a future as a soul-less creature was desirable. And I certainly wasn't going to tell her that Alice had seen her dead.

She was staring at me, curiosity burning in her eyes. I decided that it was time to distract her. Bella was entirely too observant for her own good. "Is that any good?" I teased, turning back towards her and eying her breakfast. "Honestly, it doesn't look very appetizing."

"Well," she murmured, "it's no irritable grizzly…"

I glared at her, unable to believe that she took my inhumanity so casually. She ignored me.

I knew she was thinking about something as she hurried through the remainder of her breakfast. It was driving me absolutely insane, so I moved to stare out the back windows. Maybe, if I couldn't watch her, she wouldn't frustrate me quite so much. I didn't understand, still, how she could be immune to my talent. I had never known that to be possible. And why was she only immune to me? Alice could see her. She wasn't blind to Bella's future like I was to her mind. Why not? Would Jasper's talent affect her? I wanted to know. It wouldn't be quite so difficult if I wasn't the only one whose skills she baffled. Well, she was going to be meeting my family. She hadn't said no, after all. She would be meeting my family. But her father needed to know what was going on. If he knew about my relationship with Bella, that she spent time with me, my chances of hurting her lessened. If Chief Swan knew I was with her, I would risk hurting my family by hurting her. Double security. Every moment I spent with her made it easier to control the monster, but that didn't mean that my control would ever be infaliable. I turned back to her, a grin stretching the corners of my mouth. "And you should introduce me to your father, too, I think." It would also be the proper course of action in a more mundane sense. A father needed to know about his daughter's boyfriend.

"He already knows you."

"As your boyfriend, I mean."

"Why?" she demanded, suspicious.

"Isn't that customary?" I kept my tone light, feigning innocence. It had been the custom in my time, anyway. What if it wasn't any longer? How was I to know? I hardly ever paid attention to the thoughts that concerned dating, so I had no idea what was proper in this day and age. For an immesurable length of time, I was hideously frightened that I had offended her .

"I don't know," she admitted. "That's not necessary, you know. I don't expect you to… I mean, you don't have to pretend for me."

Did she really have no concept of how much she meant to me? How could she not? For the thousandth time since I met her, I wished that her mind was not silent to me. "I'm not pretending," I told her patiently, willing her to believe. She wouldn't look at me. Instead, she gazed at the remains of her cereal, pushing the last little bit around the edges of the bowl. She bit her lip in a very attractive manner.

I couldn't take the silence anymore. If I didn't speak, I was going to do something I would regret. And i still had no idea which instinct would prove stronger when I did so. "Are you going to tell Charlie I'm your boyfriend or not?" I demanded.

"Is that what you are?" The expression on her face was very nearly a grimace of pain.

What else did she think I could be? I had told her that she had become my life. She had to know, by now, that I loved her. "It's a loose interpretation of the word 'boy' I'll admit." I was old enough to be Bella's great- grandfather. 'Boy' was definitely not a word one would associate with me. And the word 'boyfriend' certainly wasn't indicative of the way I felt about her. I wanted to be so much more. Last night, holding her, I had realized exactly how I felt about her. There was no way, however, for me to know exactly how she felt about me.

"I was thinking that you were something more, actually," she admitted, still refusing to look at me.

I hadn't been expecting that. I wanted it to be true, but I've seen into far too many minds. She was human. It was difficult to believe that she loved me as much as I loved her. I dismissed the worry. I would deal with that when we came to it. "Well, I don't know if we need to give him all the gory details." I couldn't take not being able to see her eyes any longer. They were my only window to her thoughts. I had grown so used to depending on that other sense that I was completely lost without it. I didn't know how to make my feelings clear to her. I had no way of learning how she felt for me. So I reached across the table and lifted her chin carefully with one finger. Her soft skin burned against my icy flesh. "But he will need some explanation for why I'm around here so much. I don't want Chief Swan getting a restraining order put on me." I watched her eyes carefully, hoping they would give a clue to her thoughts. I couldn't deny an intense craving to be near her. It was much stronger than my lust for her blood.

"Will you be?" she asked anxiously. "Will you really be here?"

"As long as you want me." Who knew how long that would be? She was human, after all. Things change so quickly, for them. Not so for my kind.

"I'll always want you," she said, utter conviction clear in her tone. "Forever."

I walked slowly around the table, pausing a few feet away from her and touching my fingertips to her face. Forever, she'd said. She had no concept of what forever was. No human did. All of their passions are shallow, fleeting things. There is no forever, not for them. But oh! How I wanted to believe that she was different!

"Does that make you sad?" she asked.

I couldn't answer. I just stared into her eyes, willing her mind to open to me. Yearning to believe that she loved me in the way she said she did.

"Are you finished?" I finally managed to ask.

She jumped to her feet. "Yes"

"Get dressed—I'll wait here."

I tried to be patient. I did. But it was impossible to stand still. So I paced. She seemed to be taking an eternity…. Eventually, I ended up at the foot of the staircase. When she finally descended, I couldn't breathe. And if it had been possible to regain my soul by speaking in that moment, as my eyes first beheld her, well, I would undoubtedly have remained as I am. She looked… ravishing. She had put her hair up, and it highlighted the glorious contours of her throat, as did the neckline of her dark blue blouse. The same one she had worn to Port Angeles, the one that looked so wonderful against her pale skin. The thirst flared as I let my eyes trace the graceful line of her throat. And then the rest of her appearance caught my attention, pulling the man inside me to the surface, and completely overwhelming the monster.

She was wearing a skirt. I had never seen her wear a skirt before; it was entirely lovely on her. It was long, and made of some light- colored material. It did not expose much of anything that would have been considered improper in my time, but it offered… hints… of the body that lay beneath like her baggy jeans never had. She was beautiful.

"Okay," she called, "I'm decent." She did not see me standing at the base of the stairs, and bounced right into me. I caught her easily, steadying her, holding her carefully for a moment as I tested the thirst. And then I pulled her close.

"Wrong again," I breathed against her ear. "You are utterly indecent-- no one should look so tempting, it's not fair."

"Tempting how?" she asked, obviously confused. "I can change…"

I sighed, shaking my head. That was the last thing I wanted her to do. "You are so absurd." Then I realized how that sounded, so I pressed my lips delicately against her forehead to take the sting out of the statement. I didn't want to hurt her feelings again. That kiss heightened the desires I felt for her.

"Shall I explain how you are tempting me?" I asked quietly, letting the fingers of one hand slide down her spine. I was having difficulty controlling my breathing. And then I couldn't take it any longer. I had to kiss her again. I bent very slowly, trying to give her time to pull away from me if she wanted to. If she was afraid. She didn't move away, so I brushed my lips lightly against the burning heat of hers for a brief moment.

And then she collapsed.

I was terrified as I caught her again, refusing to let her hit the floor. "Bella?"

"You… made…me… faint," she accused, her eyes unfocused.

"What am I going to do with you?" I groaned, exasperated through my fear for her. "Yesterday I kiss you, and you attack me! Today you pass out on me!" I couldn't believe the difference. What had changed? Was she terrified of me? Had she been too afraid to pull away from me? Was it fear that made her faint? I had no way of knowing.

Still in my arms, she laughed. The sound was very weak, but it was reassuring. If she was laughing, she can't have been afraid.

"So much for being good at everything," I sighed. If my brothers found out about this, they'd be teasing me about my kissing expertise for the next decade or two.

"That's the problem," she said, still letting me support her, "You're too good. Far, far too good."

I decided not to comment on that. What could I say that wouldn't make me sound like an arrogant fool? "Do you feel sick?" I asked. If she said yes, I would let her stay here. Not make her face her fear of my family. I remembered how sick she had been the day she fainted in Biology.

"No—that wasn't the same kind of fainting at all. I don't know what happened." She shook her head, chagrin obvious in her eyes. "I think I forgot to breathe."

Forgot to breathe? Only Bella. "I can't take you anywhere like this."

"I'm fine," she insisted, stubborn. "Your family is going to think I'm insane anyway, what's the difference?"

What, indeed. She was truly a remarkable human. I studied her expression for a time, realizing that she'd made up her mind. She wasn't going to let me persuade her to stay home. As I studied her, I realized again how lovely she was. I'd never really told her how wonderful she looked.

"I'm very partial to that color with your skin."

She bushed a brilliant scarlet and looked away from me.

"Look," she said, the blush still bright, "I'm trying really hard not to think about what I'm about to do, so can we go already?"

Ah, so despite her protestations to the contrary, she was frightened. Of my family? "And you're worried, not because you're headed to meet a houseful of vampires, but because you think those vampires won't approve of you, correct?"

"That's right," she said quickly, confidently. But there was something hiding in her eyes. Surprise?

I shook my head again. "You're incredible."

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And so ends Part 2- I'll keep going when I can, but I'm a full- time student with a job, and I need to sleep occasionally, lol. I also don't need any help where procrastinating on my homework is concerned, so I know that I need to be a good girl and only work on this when all of that is done. Please be patient with me!

Criticisms are appreciated! I can't get better if I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

Thanks for reading!