Disclaimer: If Lucky Star did not belong to Kagami Yoshimizu, it would not exist. It is therefore not mine and I'm just being an enormous dork.

Author's Notes: Sorry this took so long! (Blame my co-author.) Thanks for all of the awesome reviews we've been getting over this story. We are truly flattered, and we promise not to make it suck. Gotta say, this chapter will not be quite as fluffy as the last…but the next one will be even more so, so don't ditch us!

Chapter 4: Mixed Intentions

The school year pressed on. November began to ease into December, bringing with it the impending end of the term and the final exams that would accompany it. As the girls' attention shifted back to making passing grades, the events of the sleepover went unmentioned. Tsukasa had most likely blissfully forgotten what she had seen, Kagami was no doubt simply pretending that it had made no emotional impact on her, and Konata...

...was "discretely" relentless.

"Hey, Kagami!" Konata lifted a hand and waved from her seat to the approaching Kagami.

"Yo," Kagami answered cheerily, pulling up a chair and arranging herself for lunch. Tsukasa and Miyuki likewise said their hello's, each of them daintily unwrapping their bento boxes. Though her friends had already begun their meals, Konata seemed to hesitate before pulling out her choco cornet. There was a certain sparkle to her eye as she spoke up.

"Everyone, don't stuff yourselves yet. I have something for you guys." She turned and picked up a bag that had been hanging on the back of her seat. Everyone save Kagami looked up excitedly.

"Something for us, Kona-chan? What is it?" Tsukasa bounced a little.

"Do share, Izumi-san." Miyuki smiled.

Kagami regarded Konata dubiously, "Why is it that I always seem to get an uneasy feeling at times like this?"

Konata didn't give a verbal answer besides a small "Hn!" She pulled a small box out of the bag. Oddly, the box was wrapped in a sheet of newspaper. Her little hands carefully unwrapped it and revealed five fresh, tasty looking ohagi. Each piece was topped by a small clip of paper with an English letter, ranging from A to E.

"Hey! That looks really suspicious wrapped like that, you know!" Kagami pointed at the crude wrapping.

"Really? I just used what I had."

Tsukasa was never critical and simply reacted happily. "Oh, Kona-chan made us ohagi!"

Miyuki looked flattered. "Oh my, you shouldn't have!"

"You're welcome!" Konata held out the box for her friends. "You shouldn't be so paranoid, Kagamin." Konata's placid grin only heightened Kagami's paranoia, of course. While Tsukasa and Miyuki each reached out for one of the dark-brown rice snacks, Kagami hesitated.

Konata glanced at her. Batting her large eyes, she suddenly brandished an unusually cute voice. "Kona-chan made one special for you, Kagamin. Can you find it?"

Kagami responded with a raised brow and a perplexed look. "What are you talking about? And what's with that voice?"

Konata's voice and mannerisms suddenly shifted again and became more tom-boyish. "See the letters, guys? You have to solve the puzzle by tomorrow."

Tsukasa looked up from the bite she had already taken. "Puzzle?"

"I'm feeling less and less inclined to even try these when you act like this, you know." The twin-tailed tsundere narrowed her eyes.

"I thought you liked puzzles, Kagamin," Konata quipped.

Kagami was about to retort when her sister's innocent exclamation cut her off. "Kona-chan, these are really good!" Miyuki nodded in agreement.

"I agree. You are quite skilled, Izumi-san."

"Thanks! I left the needles out this time, just for you guys."

Everyone stopped for a moment.

"...what?"

Konata's smile did not waver. Kagami, believing she had just grasped what was going on, had had enough. She slammed her open palm down on the desk and leaned angrily toward the smug little geek. "Just what made you think that referencing horror anime was a good idea while feeding your friends?!"

Konata waved her hand dismissively. "Really Kagamin, they're fine."

"Thanks, but I think I'll pass."

"Have one, have one! Here, here!" The blue haired girl picked one up and started waving it, as if enticing an animal. Kagami grimaced.

"That wasn't funny the first time!"

"Oneechan, try it!" Tsukasa encouraged.

"Fine, fine! Just stop waving it in my face!"

The grumpy girl snatched the ohagi from Konata's hand, frowning at her. With a bit of hesitation, she lifted it to her mouth. She took a glance at Konata, who was only smirking at her. Shutting her eyes uneasily, she took a bite.

Kagami blinked her eyes open again after a moment of chewing. "Hey...this actually is pretty good, Konata."

Konata looked happy to hear it, almost as if Kagami's opinion weighed on her a little. "Yeah?"

"Well yeah, I just said so didn't I?" She swallowed another small bite. "Your cooking's really not bad."

"You think so, huh..." Konata tapped a finger to her chin. "Then, d'ya think I'd make a good wife?"

Kagami's brow furrowed. "Eh?"

"Do you think I'd make a good wife?" Konata repeated.

Kagami took a moment to grasp the question, and gave her friend a matter-of-fact look.

"No."

The upper half of Konata's face turned to an offended bluish hue, her mouth forming a triangular pout. "How brutal."

"Come on, Konata. It'd take a really...special person to be a husband for you, and you know it."

"Hm...yeah, I guess so. Someone really special to suit my special needs." Konata directed a stare at Kagami that would have made even a laid-back person uncomfortable. The pigtailed girl glanced uneasily from side to side, then back to the locked gaze of her strange little friend.

"H...hey, why are you looking at me that way? That's weird."

"No reason." Konata sighed through her nose. Wow, she sure can be dumb. How awful. I asked such an obvious question and then stared at her in such an obvious way and she didn't get it. Even after that slumber party, she didn't get it at all! Maybe it was because I couldn't resist tickling her when I found out she was ticklish. It was just such an amazing discovery, I couldn't help myself! Maybe I didn't trigger a flag at all...no, I'm sure I did! But this is so frustrating, Kagamin!





A few days later, at the end of the day, the girls were still following their usual routines. Kagami stepped around some of the exiting students from class 3-B and walked over to her friends, still at their desks. "Hiya!" She greeted, friendly smile and waving hand in place.

Konata returned the greeting, "Hey, ready to go home?"

"Sure am. You guys too?" The others nodded.

"Just waiting for you. Did you get stuck in your chair again?" Konata grinned.

"What do you mean 'again'?" Kagami fumed.

The group of friends headed out at a casual pace. Konata didn't bother answering, but opted to cleverly change the subject.

"Hey, remember that time we talked about what animals we'd be?"

"Yeah, I think..."

Miyuki shook her head, not having been present for the mentioned conversation. Tsukasa perked up. "I remember! Kona-chan was a fox, I was a dog, Yuki-chan was a sheep, and Oneechan was a bunny, right?"

"What about it?" Kagami asked.

"I was just wondering how we would interact if we were those animals."

"Oh?"

Miyuki spoke up, picking up on the details of what she'd missed. She wore a bemused smile as she answered, "Well, if I were a sheep, Tsukasa-san might possibly be the sheepdog that keeps predators away from my flock."

"Boy, now that's something hard to imagine..." Kagami smikred at her wide-eyed sister. Konata laughed.

"Yeah, she's more likely to hide behind the sheep if a predator came along."

Tsukasa chuckled timidly, then attempted to shift the attention. "Kona-chan, would you be worshiped at a local shrine?"

Konata closed her eyes and puffed out her lack of chest proudly, "Of course I would."

"Now there's something I don't want to imagine." Kagami rolled her eyes.

"Ah, but you're not one to talk, Kagamin. After all, you come from the moon and think you're better than everyone else. That's why you can't stand the idea of one of your predators getting more attention than you." She wiggled a finger. "It must be so lonely up there on the moon. You're just afraid to come down, aren't you usa-chan?" Konata spoke rapidly, inching closer to Kagami with every sentence.

Kagami leaned back uneasily, "Hey, since when did rabbits have such a stigma?"

"Actually..." Miyuki chimed. "The association of rabbits on the moon came from the shape formed by the patterns and markings on the moon, you know." She smiled as the others gave her their attention. "Since the markings resemble a rabbit standing over a mortar, the Chinese believed that the rabbit was the pet of a goddess, who pounded herbal medicines for the gods. However, Japan and Korea's version simply has the moon rabbit pounding mochi."

"Ah, mochi." Konata folded her arms. "Then Kagamin would be the rabbit who ate the mochi that all the other rabbits made."

"Do you have something you're trying to say to me??" The lilac haired girl demanded, fist clenched.

Konata did not satisfy with a direct answer. "Remember that time you ate a lot of mochi and then got depressed when you gained a few kilos?"

"Ugh, I figured this is where you were going..."

"Hehe..." The smaller girl chuckled, covering her mouth with her hand. "Seeing as you'd be such a fat bunny, maybe I'd eat you." She suddenly leaned in close, with lowered eyelids and a smug grin.

Kagami's jaw popped open, her face gaining a frightened shade of grayish blue. "Y-you'd what??"

"Eat you. Nomnomnom." Konata wiggled her fingers in mock menace. Kagami's darkened hue began evolving into a brighter red as Konata's distance from her face only decreased.

"D-don't say things like that!" She sputtered. "That's gross!"

"Why not? The fox is a natural predator of bunnies, kon-kon!" One could all too easily imagine a pair of pricked yellow ears flicking mischievously atop her blue hair.

"That doesn't mean you can just blurt out weird stuff like that!" Kagami straightened her spine, attempting to look a bit more assertive and a little less flustered. She didn't do the best job, as her cheeks still maintained a slight glow. Frowning as if it would make the blush less noticeable, Kagami placed her hands on her hips. "B-besides, the rabbit usually gets away over half of the time..."

"Yeah, but the fox is cunning and the rabbit is out of shape."

"Yeah, well the fox is looking at not having any homework to copy this week." Kagami growled.

Konata's eyebrows fell as a metaphorical little yellow jolt ding-donged at the side of her head. "He-hey, you don't have to be so hasty..." Her tone sweetened. Kagami grinned a tiny grin of triumph. A barely noticeable blush still clung to her face. Konata rubbed the back of her head a little, "The rabbit does usually get away...but you have to admit. Sometimes it doesn't try enough, or maybe the fox is too crafty." Konata's voice dropped its suck-up tone and took on a much more pensive air than it was apt to having. "Sometimes, do you think the rabbit might want to be caught?"

Kagami's grin faded. "What exactly are you trying to say, here?" She asked, a questionable timid shift sneaking into her tone.

"I don't know. That's why I asked you." The smaller girl stared, as if it should be obvious. Kagami stared back, looking staggeringly perplexed. There was a moment of silence that started to stretch out, the both of them locked in place. The confused look on Kagami's face gradually began to shift to a nervous embarrassment as the stare continued. With the slow color transition of a mood ring, the blood in the girl's face started to rise again. Konata simply looked expectant. Awkwardness increased.

Kagami sputtered, "J-jeez, I don't even know what you're talking about half the time!" She sharply diverted her gaze to the floor, raising her shoulders defensively.

Konata sighed heavily and shook her head, "And you were supposed to be the smart one. I bet Miyuki-san would have known." She folded her small arms. Miyuki was too busy explaining to a fascinated Tsukasa about a fluffy white breed of dog who becomes a part of the sheep's flock in order to protect them, to notice that she had been mentioned. Kagami forcefully gave her attention back to the sheepdog conversation, leaving Konata with her frustrations.

Hmph. So close! But maybe this kind of reaction a good sign. It didn't go entirely over your ears this time, my little usa-chan. Hnn, looks like I'm getting to you. Maybe it's time for a bigger move...


"Ah, I had a horrible dream last night!" Kagami exclaimed as a morning announcement, putting her hand to her forehead.

"Nrrn? What was it about?" Konata inquired.

"I dreamed I went to get a haircut, and...and the guy sliced off half of my hair. It looked awful!"

"Oneechan really likes her long hair." Tsukasa giggled. Konata seemed to be contemplating.

"Half your hair..." She held up her index finger. "That means your twin tails wouldn't work anymore. They'd look stupid."

"Yeah, I know." Kagami looked a little irritated, but shrugged off the indirect insult. She sighed. "It was such a relief to wake up..."

"The best thing about having a nightmare is waking up from it!" Tsukasa agreed. "It's such a good feeling to know it was all fake." Kagami nodded in full agreement with her sister.

"It figures that a scary dream for Kagami would be about something so vain, though." Konata remarked, glancing off to the side.

"What was that?" The twin-tailed girl twitched.

Konata ignored her and kept going. "The only thing that'd really work for you in that case would be that samurai ponytail of yours...though it would be shorter..." she imagined it with a slight blush and not-so discreet giggle. Her friend frowned.

"Hey, I thought we weren't going to mention that again."

"But Kagamin." Abruptly, Konata grabbed her friend's shoulders. Her amused little expression very suddenly switched gears to one of steely-eyed seriousness. Even her voice seemed to deepen ever so slightly. "The truth is, ponytails really turn me on!"

"Eh?!" Was all the stunned girl could respond with.

"That time you wore that ponytail--it looked so good it was criminal!" The blue-haired girl's voice became more passionate.

Kagami became a stuttering mess. "Wh-what are you saying--you couldn't possibly mean--it didn't look so--I mean, you really think--what...what...what are you referencing?" The tsundere's tone immediately dropped from flattered to flattened as realization dawned on her.

Konata's impassioned eyes turned back into the usual horizontal scribbles. "Hyunnnn."

That morning, accompanying Konata to her classroom were Tsukasa, Miyuki, and a large sore spot on her head. She rubbed it a few times, wearing an indignant pout.

That probably sent me a few points back. Maybe I should try to keep anime and manga references out of my attempts from now on... The little otaku tilted her head off to the side, rivers running down along the sides of her bittersweet cat smile, ...but I just don't know if I can help that, Kagamin! She held her little fist up to her chin and clenched it. Tsukasa didn't know what to say.

"Ko-kona-chan...?"


December had been moving along quickly. The middle of the month was nearing, and the usual panic had settled upon many students dreading their final exams before break. Konata, however, was un-fazed as per usual. The waning school term did not keep her from her devotion to her job any more than it kept her from her beloved games. Well, almost.

It was a breezy evening. The sun had already set, and another hard afternoon's work was over with. In the back room of the cafe, Haruhi and Mikuru were busy transforming back into Konata and Patricia. Konata was beyond pleased. When she had arrived at work that afternoon, she, Patty, and that mysterious quiet girl were given the gifts of two tickets to the indoor theme park, Tokyo Joy00000. Their manager had called it an early bonus in lieu of the holidays and for being so remarkably popular with the customers. Business had steadily grown since their employment, and the kind manager knew that at least two of the three of them would appreciate such a gift. Naturally, both blue and blonde were thrilled. At first.

Patty, who was in the middle of pulling the ties out of her hair, did not look as euphoric as one would expect. In fact, she let out a heavy sigh while fluffing her hair back to normal. It wasn't hard for Konata to pick up on her attitude.

"Patty, what's wrong?" She asked. Patty's lip quivered.

"Konata, it's horrible! A tragedy!"

"S-season two was all a lie?!" Konata gasped.

"Well, not that horrible...but Konata, my parents won't let me use these!" Patty held the tickets to her friend's face.

Konata frowned, "Why not? They let you work here."

Patty looked despairingly to the floor. "I just got off the phone with them. Final examinations are coming up, they say my grades haven't been good enough and I need to stay home and study until the trimester is over! And these expire before then!"

"I guess the manager has been out of school so long that he forgot what this time of year is like for most people our age." Konata assumed, sighing a little. "Are you sure they won't let you go?"

Patty nodded sadly, her head still hung, "I'm sure." She clenched her fists and shook them up and down, finally looking up at Konata with a squiggled frown on her face. "It's not as if I didn't study! I don't get these Japanese history tests! They didn't ask what year Britannia invaded, or about Japan's legendary baseball game with America in the Edo Period, or anything important! I would've aced it otherwise!"

Konata's eyes squinted as she scratched her chin. "Ah...Patty...I learned a long time ago that anime isn't always a reliable source for history tests..."

Patty looked at Konata as if she had just given her some sage advice in Norwegian. Something did not compute. She let it slide, and continued elaborating. "Konata!"

Konata sweatdropped a little and asked, "Yes, Patty?"

"I want you to use these in my stead!" Patty thrust the tickets in the shorter girl's face once again. "They mustn't go to waste!"

Now, Konata could have been polite as a proper young lady should, and tried to refuse them. But that wasn't her style. Her left hand took the tickets, and her right hand squeezed the left hand of her otaku comrade in the manner that two Shonen Jump heroes would.

"It's a promise!" She declared. Patty naturally returned the exaggerated emotion.

"Thank you, my good friend!"

Konata didn't take long to figure out where the other three tickets would go. Kagami, Tsukasa, and Miyuki, of course. As usual, there was a bit of a selfish agenda there. Miyuki and Tsukasa were deliciously moe, and seeing them face amusement park rides would be entertaining, to say the least. More importantly, scary rides would give Konata and Kagami a reason to split from the other two for a while. From there it would be easy enough to bully Kagami onto a ride that was slow, dark, and potentially….

Konata's plan grew throughout the evening.

I WILL level up that day!

Footnotes: Hey, it's Konata's author here. Sorry this chapter took longer than the others. I had finals, and this was a Konata-heavy chapter, so it had to wait for me to have time to work on it.
We were originally going to make chapter 4 be the amusement park chapter. Unfortunately there was just too much time to pass between the slumber party and the time of year that the amusement park chapter was going to take place, so we wanted to cover some events in between.
Therefore, we made a small collection of Konata's schemes and attempts, leading up to an introduction of her amusement park plan. So get ready for chapter five. It will be EPIC.

Next Time: Good evening, I'm Miyuki. Did you know that fanfiction can be dated back to medieval times, when authors began writing their own versions of King Arthur's stories? Nowadays, the demographic for those who write fanfiction are those born between the years of 1985 and 1992. Oh my, I wonder if I should start writing my own, then?

Next Chapter: The Biggest Thrill. O-tanoshimi ni!