As I was doing this chapter, I had to look up a couple things to make sure I didn't mess up the true meaning of "White Day", and I came across "Black Day" as well. I have to say, Black day really made me laugh. A lot. Cheers to being single :)

...why did my baby brother just crawl into my dog's cage...?!

And why did I listen to "Walk It Out" the entire time I wrote this? Honestly, today is one weird day.

Disclaimer: I would claim Inuyasha...but jail doesn't seem fun enough for me to stay there. :(


Dear Cupid, I Want You Dead

Sango's Guide to Guests

Sango loved Kagome. Really, she did. The younger girl was like a sister she'd never had, someone smart and wise whom she could confide in about things she wouldn't dare go into detail about with other people.

But honestly, the girl freaked her out at times. And this was one of them.

"Okay, so I was thinking of doing a theme, but then I realized how lame themes were," Kagome babbled on, pacing Kaede's hut in her socks, pen cap pressed up to her lip and her eyebrows furrowed in thought. Kirara paced alongside her, occasionally trying to nip at her socked toes. "That doesn't mean we can't at least have a color scheme, though."

Sango nodded, although she had no clue whatsoever what she was going on about. She knew that Kagome had been over-enthusiastic when Miroku had announced their engagement a month ago and was planning some kind of celebration, but this Valentine's day thing? What did that have to do with anything?

"But I decided to just wait until after we've at least planned out the guest list to see what colors would work best with each other," the girl went on. "I've already produced a list, but you can check to make sure I didn't forget anyone." She pulled a sheet of paper from within her notebook and handed it over to Sango, who had been sitting patiently in a corner of the hut, secretly hoping that if she hid long enough Kagome would forget she was there. Kaede, who was sitting in the center of the room and stirring something in a large black pot, shook her head and sighed.

"Kagome, my child," She said. "What are you going on about?"

"Why is no one listening to me?" Kagome wailed. "I've been talking about this for practically three weeks and you guys are still ignoring me!"

"Because we have no idea what ye's going on about!" Kaede replied, her good eye blinking. "Only you know what goes on in that brain of yours."

"And only you know what's hidden behind that dumb patch of yours," Kagome retorted under her breath. Kaede didn't hear her, but Shippou and Kirara turned towards each other, their eyebrows raised.

"Ooh. Burn!" Shippou laughed, high fiving (or pawing) Kirara. Sango gave Kagome an apologetic smile.

"Maybe it wouldn't harm you to explain this to me one more time though, Kagome," She said. Kagome turned towards her, a smile covering her face.

"Sure, Sango!" She chirped, sitting down across from her and smoothing the creases out of her skirt. "As you know, I'm planning a celebration for you and Miroku's engagement."

"Right. But..." Sango sighed, rubbing her temples. "What's Valentine's Day?"

"Huh? Oh! Right!" Kagome beamed. "Valentine's day is a day we celebrate on February 14th. Girls usually give guys gifts like chocolate or something sentimental like that, then on White Day, guys give girls stuff back!"

Sango's brow creased. "White Day?"

"Yup. And then, if you suck enough and don't get any gifts then, you usually end up celebrating Black Day..."

Now Sango was truly baffled. "Black Day?"

"Uh huh! Black day is when single people who didn't get anything get together and eat noddles with black bean sauce. Kind of fun, actually. me and a few of my friends celebrated it in seventh grade."

"Huh." Sango shook her head. "Any other colored days I should know about?"

Kagome bit her lip. "I always kind of wondered what Yom Kipper was..."

Sango rolled her eyes and scanned the momentarily forgotten list that Kagome had given her. "Hmm. Me...Miroku...Inuyasha...You...Kaede...Kikyo?" Her eyes flew to Kagome's face. "Are you serious?"

Kagome stiffened. "Yes-"

"Are you on...what's that stuff Inuyasha told me about from your era-"

"No! i'm not on crack! Why is everyone saying that?"

Sango sighed, checking the list out again. "You're inviting Kouga?"

Kagome appeared defensive. "So?"

"So? Inuyasha's going to kill him!"

"Will not." Kagome's chin rose. "Inuyasha will be mature about the entire thing, I'm sure."

"Oh, yeah? Does he know Kouga's coming?" Kagome's frown deepened. "You know, Kouga did swear a vendetta on him. He still blames Inuyasha for losing his jewel shards in his legs."

"That's all in the past!" Kagome declared, waving her hand at the girl.

"It was a month and three days ago!" Sango replied, slightly impatient.

"Ye two should both calm down," Kaede advised in a calm voice.

"Ye should mind your own business," Kagome mumbled. She instantly felt bad. That darn Inuyasha was starting to rub off on her!

"Ooh! Another burn!" Shippou laughed, slapping Kirara's paw again. "Kagome 2. Kaede 0."

"Mew," Kirara agreed.

Sango continued to stare at the list. Her eyes widened. "Are you kidding me?!"

"What?"

She held up the paper, jamming her finger to one of the names. "Lord Kuranoske?! Kagome, get real! Miroku would-"

"What, get mad?" Kagome snorted. "Please. Why should he get mad?"

"Because I don't know...the guy proposed to me?" Sango replied sardonically. Kagome waved a hand.

"It was fair game then!" She exclaimed. "It's not like Miroku knew how you felt, or you knew how he felt. Besides, all he does is flirt with anything with a butt. Why should you care how he'll react seeing an old flame?"

"Um, we never dated," Sango reminded her.

"Sure."

"Really, we didn't."

"Okay. If you say so."

Sango shook her head and resumed staring at the list. "Who's Eri, Yuka, Ayumi, Hojo-"

"Oh, just people from my era," Kagome claimed with yet another wave of her hand. Sango gave her a skeptical look but chose not to comment.

"Okay..." She closed her mouth but within seconds it had flew open once again. "Wait, WHAT?!" She shrieked. "Kagura, Kanna, Hakudoshi, NARAKU??"

"Well," Kagome explained in a tiny voice. "It would be rude not to, after all we've put them through-"

"What's wrong with you?" Sango yelled. "He killed my family!"

"He killed mine, too!" Shippo added from a few feet away.

"He killed my sister," Kaede interjected from the other side of the hut.

"Mew," Kirara put in, licking her paws.

"He burned down my village!" An old man cried out, wobbling near the doorway.

"He fed my baby to a demon!" Another woman yelled in the distance.

"Well, who asked you?" Kagome snapped at him. "In fact, who are you people? Get out of here!"

The man scurried away, and the woman's voice from the distance faded away. Kagome rolled her eyes. "The idiots are so useless he doesn't even have a name..."

"Kagome, I understand you want to make peace," Sango tried, while inwardly wondering if Kagome was sane. "It's your nature. But I'm pretty sure inviting them is a bad idea."

"I'm pretty sure this whole thing is a bad idea," The old man muttered again.

"I thought you left?" Kagome yelled. "What are you waiting for? Clear out of here!"

"I appreciate all of this, but maybe he's right," Sango insisted. "I like celebrations as much as the next person, but Miroku and I-" She massaged her temples. "After everything that's happened, we just want a nice quiet," She put such emphasis on "quiet" that her throat hurt form the exertion of the word. "Engagement."

"Oh." Kagome frowned. "Quiet." She gave Sango a small smile, putting her hand over her's. "Of course. I was only doing this to make you happy, but if quiet's what you want-"

"it is," Sango replied with earnest. "It really is." She returned Kagome's smile. "Thank you, Kagome."

"Sure."

The hut was silent for a few moments. Sango sighed, her features relaxing. "Now this is lovely-"

"AH! AND HE HAD MAN BOOBIES!"

"CUPID IS SATANIC! HE'S GOING TO KILL US ALL! HIM AND HIS EVIL BEAR OF DOOM!"

Sango's eyes narrowed. "Miroku..."

"Inuyasha," Kagome said in the same deadly voice. There was a small crash and the sound of heavy footsteps rapidly pounding the wooden stairs outside before the hanyou and the monk flew into the room, collapsing into heaps on the floor and sighing in relief. Kagome was the first to react.

"What in the-"

"Kagome!" Inuyasha lunged towards her, knocking her over (not the best move since her now short skirt was hiked up even more severely than usual, giving onlookers a glimpse of her panties) and throwing his arms around her middle. "Kagome, i was so scared-"

'It was horrible!" Miroku was yelling to Sango, her hand being clenched in his own. "There was an over sized baby-"

"-And he had mutant flowers!"

"And his bear was from hell-"

"-And there was all this...pink!"

"-And he was a minion from Cupid-"

"And the flying paper of evil!"

"And the pink!"

"And the horrible flying candy!"

"And the PINK!"

"And the-'

"PINK!"

"SIT!" Kagome bellowed the same time Sango smacked Miroku; Miroku tumbled to the ground and Inuyasha slammed to the floor, both men groaning into the floorboards. Sango and Kagome shook their heads.

"Idiots," Shippou mumbled.

"Mew," Kirara agreed.

"Some quiet engagement," Sango muttered. Kagome's smile grew.

"So, should I continue my plans?" She asked, dancing on the balls of her feet hopefully. Sango gave her over-eager expression a frown.

And sighed.

"Why not?" She said. "What's the worst that could happen?"

"Oh, thank you thank you thank you!" Kagome gushed, hugging her neck and jumping up and down. "This will be great, I swear!"

"Mmm."

"You won't regret it. Honest!"

"Okay."

"And don't worry; Naraku and Kouga and Kuranoske will all get along-"

"KOUGA?" Inuyasha snapped, his eyes wide as he looked up.

"Kuranoske?" Miroku raised an eyebrow.

"Are you serious?!" Both men said in unison. Kagome shrugged.

"Sit," she simply said.

Inuyasha slammed into the floor again, the heavy vibrations causing Miroku to tumble over as well. Sango smirked. Shippou laughed. Kirara covered her eyes with her paws.

And Kaede sighed.

"Maybe one of these days they'll get their own place," She quietly said under her breath.


I love how neither one of them cared that NARAKU'S coming. You know, they guy who tried to kill them all and ruined their lives?Revieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew.

(You know you want to) -Kelsey