AN: Thanks everyone for your reviews! This one isn't really funny, except maybe for the humorous note at the end, but I really need more inspiration. So. If anyone has any prompts, whether it be sad or funny, about Owen, Ianto, or both, et cetera, PM or review!
"Owen...I need to ask you a few things."
Owen looked at Ianto before he got off the floor. The autopsy table was now fixed to his liking, and it no longer made that awful groaning noise whenever something heavier than 100 pounds was set upon it. Owen then walked around and followed Ianto out of the morgue and into the spare room.
Ianto slid into a chair behind a computer - not one of the high-tech computers like the one in the main room, but more of a big, square monitor and a Dell system. Ianto motioned to the chair on the other side of the desk and pulled up a window on the computer by using a mouse. Owen, as he complied, glanced at the mouse pad. The Torchwood logo was tattooed on it. How surprising (not).
"Yes, Ianto?" Owen asked.
"I feel uncomfortable asking you, but I never got the chance when you first joined up. I was organizing our files and noticed that I never got it done."
"Spit it out, Ianto."
Ianto said flatly, "What would you like it to say on your death certificate?"
There was a small silence. Owen swallowed, looking away, pretending to think this over even though Ianto knew better. If you looked at Owen, you'd never guess that he had a phobia of death. He worked in a morgue, watched people die every day when he was a doctor, killed a few aliens even. But no one was perfect, and that was the way Owen was.
"So, is this a multiple choice question or can I pull something from a hat?" Owen joked weakly.
"You can pretty much whatever you like. We can have it that you go down nobly saving a girl from a house fire, if you'd like. We can have witnesses and everything."
Owen gave him a dirty look. Ianto shut up.
Ianto typed out Owen's requests as he stared blankly at the computer screen. It wasn't what Ianto had expected at all: Owen wished to have "Death caused by accidental shooting. Details not known." on his death certificate, and no one would be notified of his death. Ianto, to say the least, was surprised. Which was why he had to ask when they were done and Owen was walking out the door.
"May I ask?"
Owen sighed and turned, leaning against the doorframe. "Go ahead."
"Why would you want it to say your death was accidental?"
Owen considered this for a moment, before he looked at the ground. "Because that is the way I'd like to go. I don't want any car crashes, no dramatic deaths. I know it sounds stupid, and over-used...but I want to die doing this job."
With that he turned and exited the door, presumably going to annoy the living hell out of Gwen some more.
