DISCLAIMAAAA: I own this plottish type-thing, and Dave's heart. And he owns my heart. So ha.

4:00 am

In exactly four hours, Dave the Laugh will be getting on a plane to leave for Igloo-a-go-go Land. Dave the Laugh, who said he lurves me. Dave the Laugh, who has finally made my legs go jelloid. Dave the Laugh, who I am pretty much inlurve with.

He gave me a number to ring him up on. He said I can ring everyday, if I like. I think I will.

4:14 am

Perhaps I will go to the airport at 7:58, and just as Dave is about to board, I will run to him, and tell him I love him, very much so, and snog him for six million hours, and than he'll miss his flight, and stay here forever. And we can finally love freely. No Masimo, no Emma, no redbottomosity, nothing! Just be and Dave forever and ever, until eternity, and ever eternity, and zzzzzzz….

9:17 am

OOOOOOOOH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I have slept in! Dave is probably on the plane now, thinking of beavers and moose, and maple syrup.

Kitchen
9:30 am

I am only eating, because Dave would want me to. And I am also vair hungry. Mutti came in, and said she found this in the mailbox. It was an envelope addressed to moi! I opened it up, and enter waterworks, stage right!

Dear Georgia,

By the time you read this, I may very well be on the plane to Igloo-a-go-go. Please don't be sad, Sex Kitty. Y'know when you cry, your eyes go all smallish like mice eyes, and your conk looks twice as big. And red. And no one wants that.

On the brighter side of the fridge, I am looking forward to seeing my dad, and there are all certain things in Canada, I hear. It's not all beavers and ice, apparently.

And, don't you dare think I will ever, ever, EVER forget about you. You are the grooviest person I have ever snogged, and you have amazing nungas. Remember to call, and to stay out of trouble.

Give Masimo a nice big, wet snog for me!

I love you, Sex Kitty,

Love always, Dave xxx

Back in Misery headquarters (My bed)

10:00 am

Oh why did he have to goooooooooo? My pillow is all wet, and may possibly grow mould now. And I will become poisoned, and die all aloney. And my tombstone will say "Died from her own mouldy pillow… With a broken heart". Or something. I am much too sad to think of anything else.

10:10 am

GADZOOKS AND LACKDAY. I AM HUGGING MY MUTTI AND KISSING MY VATI'S BEARDY FACE.

As I was lying in my bed of misery, awaiting the mould of my damp pillow to take my life, there was a knock on the door. Being too sad and too lazy to tell whoever it was to leave me alone, I said "Enter", in a really sad voice, which I imagine sounds like the voice of a very sad woman who has just lost her lover in the Great War.

Mutti and Vati came in, all smiley-smiley. Could they not see their daughter was in AGONY?! Than they started giggling, like two school girlies.

Mutti said "Gee, we know you've been really, really upset."

Oh really? Because it seems like you both are completely oblivious to the fact I have been in bloody bed forever, crying out my soul.

Vati than said, "And we hate to see you like this, so your Mother and I have been talking, and decided to do something about it."

I felt like shouting, "GET TO THE POINT, OLD BEARDY ONE" but I must save my energy.

Mutti continued on (I swear, they must've practised this before coming up!) "So, we'd like to give you this," And she handed me a white envelope.

I took it cautiously, because you never know with Mutti. It could've been a list of chores for me to do.

I opened it up, AND NEARLY HAD A NERVY B!!

Inside was a ticket to PIZZA-A-GO-GO LAND!! Me! Going off to visit my Italian lurve God. With no parental supervision, just me and my Italian Stallion.

10:20 am

After the hug-kiss fandango (I thought Vati's beard would fall off in shock) I realized something. I do not WANT to go to Pizza-a-go-go. I do not WANT to see Masimo. I do not WANT to date Masimo.

In the front room

11:00 am

Mutti came and sit next to me.

"I thought you would've been happier, love. You've been bothering me non-stop about Italy, I would've-"

I said "Will you be able to return the ticket?"

She looked shocked. Which is understandable, "Why? Did something happen with you and the Italian Stallion?"

Than I found myself crying like billio, and telling her everything. I told her about Dave and all our secret snogs, and how he thinks Masimo is a homosexualist, and how Igloo-a-go-go is more than beavers and snow. I think she got quite overwhelmed, because she got up and made us milky-pops drink.

11:15 am

Back in Cry City. Mutti said she can return the ticket, if I am really sure. I told her yes. And cried some more.


Mobiles Give You Cancer: AND I'M BAAAAACK. I know this chapter was absolute BOLLOCKS and vair short, but I haven't written in a long long long time, and wanted to let y'all know I'm still alive. Also, I KNOW in previous chapters I've user Hamburgerese (Dollars, cents, etc) And I'm sorry. I just forget about currency whilst I've got DAVE on the mind. So review your bumoleys off, and I'll whip up a BETTER CHAPTERRR :D xxxoooo