Boulevard of Broken Dreams
author: BambiBlake007
rating: M in general
summary: introducing my OC, Abby Walker. she works at Miami-Dade under Horatio Caine. she is about to get some news.
disclaimer: i do not own CSI:NY or CSI:Miami, they belong to Zuiker & Co. i am only borrowing em. i do, however, own Abby Walker!!
author's note: all erros are mine!! i take full responsibility!! enjoy!! plz R/R.
Chapter 2
Abby Walker was stressed out.
She had never been the kind of girl who broke under pressure, but she didn't like to be stressed out, either. When she had been younger and in elementary school, the teachers had tried to break her several times, but she had never told them anything they wanted to know about anything. And for that, Abby had gotten detention more than once. In high school, she had been the one that all of her friends turned to when they needed an alibi, because she was so good at lying and not giving the parents what they knew she was hiding. It even worked now in her job. She was good at bluffing and she was good at calling a bluff. But most importantly, Abby didn't break under pressure.
Unless it had to do with Leiutenant Caine. He was her Achilles Heel. He was the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak. Yep, he was her breaking point.
She set in the waiting room that was reserved for the family members of victims and squeezed her stress ball over and over again. It had been ten minutes since Horatio had called on her and her hand was hurting. She had DNA tests waiting for her at her station. She had a case file to pour over once more to see if she had missed anything on the perp she was chasing. But when Horatio called, everything else went on the back-burner.
"What's up?" came Calleigh Dequesne's sweet southern voice.
Abby looked up. "Oh, hi, Calleigh. I'm just waiting on H. You?"
Calleigh smiled. She was tall and blond and beautiful, but she was not a ditz. She was smart and determined and Abby could only hope to be half the CSI she was. The two of em were friends. Pretty good friends, actually. So, Abby knew she could be herself when she was around Calleigh, let her guard down, which was something rarely ever did.
"I'm heading out to a scene on the beach. I wanted to soak up some rays, but not like this."
Abby smiled. "I would gladly trade places with you right now."
That was a lie. Abby hated death. She had always hated death. But her job was a-smorgas-board of death on a daily basis. Everything around her smelled of death, and it was a stench she had become accustomed to. But still, there were moments when she wished she had chosen another career path. Then she remembered what Horatio had told her when she had first come to work at Miami-Dade Crime Lab: It wasn't her that had chosen the job, so much as it was the job that had chosen her. And she tried to rememeber those words when she got down on herself for working with death every day.
Calleigh chuckled. It was light, but Abby knew she was feeling the same heaviness she was that was in the air. It had been there all day. "Well, good luck in there, Abby. I'll talk to ya later."
They waved good-bye, Calleigh heading toward the main entrance; after she was gone, Abby went back to squeezing her stress ball. Five more minutes passed and no one walked by her as she set in the small padded chair. She fidgeted a bit as she checked her watch. Horatio will be here soon, she repeated over and over in her head. She kept trying to remind herself that when Horatio Caine made an appointment, he kept it.
"Abby," came Horatio's soft voice, almost as if she had willed him to be there.
Abby stood up and pushed her stress-ball into her pocket. She moved with confidence as she crossed the waiting area and through the door. Horatio walked over to a desk and set down. He watched her for a moment, then motioned for her to do the same. Abby set down across from him, this chair was big and leather, and more comfortable than the previous one she had been sitting in. She relaxed slowly, letting her muscles loosen as she did so.
"How are you, Abby?" Horatio asked, not moving his sparkling blue eyes from the young woman seated across from him.
Abby smiled slowly. "I'm good."
"You seem to be doing quite nicely," he agreed.
"I like it here. I mean, it was--"
"I know, Abby. I know it's hard. And with the anniversary being this week," Horatio whispered.
Abby crossed her legs. "I just--"
Horatio waited. Abby felt the tears. It was easy to cry infront of Horatio. He just seemed to understand so easily and it made her feel comfortable to let her guard down around him. She didn't have to be the tough CSI/Criminal Profiler that she was, but be a vulnerable woman who actually felt and had emotions.
"I'm sorry," Abby apologized as she dabbed at her eyes. She knew her eye liner was going to run.
"No need," Horatio reassured her, reaching her a handkerchief across his desk. "I know it's hard to talk about."
"Thanks," Abby sniffled, taking the handkerchief, wadding it up in her hand, but never touching it to her eyes. "It's not that hard anymore. I mean, it's... It's not as fresh as it was when I was 18, ya know?"
Horatio nodded. "I think you're strong, Abby. I think that's what makes you so good at what you do. You know I only want the best for you. Right?"
"I know." Abby paused. "Is this what you wanted to see me about? To see if I'm ok with the anniversary coming up?"
Horatio's face showed nothing. Abby had found in the years that she had known Horatio Caine (and that had been all of her life, as far as she was concerned) he was hard to read. She was very skilled at that aspect of her job, it had become 2nd nature to her, to be able to read people, get inside their head. It was part of what she did, after all, but with Horatio, there was just no getting inside him. He was not very forthcoming and that had always annoyed the hell out of Abby!!
"I called you in here for two reasons, Abby." The red headed man, who was not wearing his trademark sunglasses at the moment, began, leaning over his desk, hands clasped out before him. "One: yes, I wanted to know if you were doing ok with everything. I talked to Chad and he said that he thought you'd be fine, but I wanted to make sure for myself."
"How was Daddy?" Abby asked with a twinkle in her eye.
"Your Father is very well."
"Good. I'm glad he's your friend," Abby told him.
"I'm glad you're his daughter," Horatio countered with a smile.
Abby smiled back. She was proud to be Chad Walker's daughter, too. He had been a Homicide Detective and had worked Miami-Dade force for all of nearly thirty years before retiring. The murder of his oldest daughter, Jescyka had been devistating on him, and he had sworn to find her killer. But he had failed to find the man who had done such a terrible thing to such a beautiful girl like Jescy Walker.
After the murder, which shook Abby pretty bad herself, she had decided to pursue a career in Criminal Justice. She was what the feds called a Criminal Profiler, but she was more than that, she also had a concentration in Psychology and was a certified CSI. She was good at what she did. And if it hadn't have been for her Father's influence and support, she wouldn't have been able to have gotten as far as she had in the field. And not only did he believe in her, but so did Horatio Caine, and that was something she cherished.
"What is the second reason you asked to see me, Horatio?" Abby asked, feeling the stress returning.
Talking about her sister's death and the anniversary of it wasn't hard, but she was still not sure what was really going on with Horatio. Was he not satisfied with her work? Was he going to fire her? The questions began to circulate through her mind, but she said nothing.
"My second reason for calling you in here today, Abby, is because I got a call a couple days ago from Detective Mac Taylor in New York."
"Um-hm?" Abby asked, feeling the tension as it began to melt away once more.
"Well, he's got an opening in his Department. He needs a Criminal Profiler, so to speak. What with your background and references, he thinks that your talents would be better suited in a city like New York. And... I think he's right," Horatio answered.
"New York? Like, New York--New York?" Abby asked, her voice rising suddenly.
Horatio nodded, letting a small smile play about his lips as he did so.
"I've never been to New York before," Abby informed him.
"I know," Horatio answered.
"I can't--Wh--You're letting me go?" Abby asked, slowly.
"If you want to go. I think Mac could benefit from your expertise and I think you're ready to move forward. You can't stay here forever, Abby. I mean, you're welcome to, but you have something inside of you that New York needs. And I want you to do good things," Horatio told her.
Abby set back and let the idea of going to New York City settle over her for a bit. It was a nice thought. A nice feeling came over her then. A nice, happy feeling. She could have squealed, but she knew better because if she did that, then half of Miami-Dade police would be swarming the office within seconds. Instead, she laughed lightly. It made her inside tingle to think that Horatio Caine believed in her that much to recommend her to another department when he could have chosen anyone else to have gone to New York and work. This was definitely a dream come true.
"Do my parents know?" Abby asked, remembering her parents.
Horatio nodded. "Yes, Chad and Angela know. I called them right after I spoke with Mac."
"And they're ok with this?"
"They're exstatic, Abby. They want you to go. They want you to succeed. They want you do what Jescy never got the chance to do. Do you understand?" Horatio explained, softly.
"I think so." Abby bit her bottom lip thoughtfully. "I want to do good."
"And you will, Abby. You will."
Abby stopped for a moment. "Is Danny Messer still in New York?"
Horatio was confused for a moment, then a knowing smile came over his face. "He is. Why do you ask? I thought you two were still in contact."
"Not lately. He's not returned my emails. I just--"
Horatio waited.
Abby smiled, nervously. "No reason, Sir. I was just wondering."
Horatio dropped the subject as well.
"When do I leave?" Abby asked, tucking a piece of her chocolate brown hair behind her ear.
"In two weeks. Is that ok with you?"
"Two weeks is fine. I'm--" Abby stood up. "Thank you, Horatio. Thank you so much for believing in me."
"There's no need in thanking me, Abby." Horatio stood up and shook her hand. "You did all the work."
After they shook hands, Horatio told Abby to take a lunch break that way she could start making plans for the move. Abby did as he asked, and headed straight to the break room to write out her list of things to do before the two weeks were up. But she found herself thinking about Danny more than writing down her plans.
It had been nearly a year since the two of them had spoken on the phone, and almost six months since they'd communicated by email and she missed him. It had been almost two years since she'd last seen him--face to face. It had been during the Marshall Griffin case that the two of them had first met. Horatio had met him a while before when he had gone to New York on a pretty high-profile case of his own and met Danny there, along with Detective Taylor. Eversince, Horatio had kept in contact with Mac. The two of them were friends; had become close. So, when there had been a murder in NYC and linked to a man in Miami, Mac and Danny had come down to help H out like he had them.
It hadn't been a long stay for the two CSI's--all of two weeks, but that had been long enough for Danny and Abby to strike up a friendship. He was quite charming and not bad to look at, either. The accent had thrown Abby off a bit, at first, because she preferred southern ones over New York ones, but after a while she had found that it wasn't quite as obnoxious on Danny. It suited him just fine.
But while it was thrilling to Abby to know that she was going to New York in just a matter of days and that she'd get to see Danny very soon, it was just as scary to think the exact same thing. He brought butterflies to her stomach and, sure, that made her feel good. He had been so sweet to her while he had been in Miami, making her feel safe when they had gone out to question the suspects, like no matter if someone shot at them, he'd take the bullet for her, and he had helped her to see that the clues were special and unique to each crime scene. While H and Mac had worked together on piecing together what exactly had gone on from state to state, Calleigh, Delko, and Wolfe had been assigned to work on one crime scene in Miami, H had called on Abby to work with Danny.
He had been specifically paired up with her, she was sure, because they were so much alike in their way of assessing a crime scene. He definitely had a way about himself: he wanted to do his very best, even if that meant breaking a rule or two. He liked to be in charge--Abby knew that, but he let her feel something more than she should have and that had been better than the alternative. There had been times, when she was really not in the mood that he would throw out some kind of wise-crack, and it had annoyed the hell out of her, sure. She would suddenly find herself getting so pissed at him and that was part of the deal. He did have a way of pissing her off. And when he pissed her off, she would be about ready to leave him standing there on the side of the road, or in the building they were investigating, or in the lab, just to blow off some steam. Then he'd grin at her with that cheshire cat grin of his, and all the anger and frustration of the day (and the anger and frustration she felt toward him) would just melt away
At the end of the day, it had only been her and Danny standing on that street corner. Even if the moment had only been in passing, she had felt it and she had been positive that he had felt it, too. He had left just as quickly as he had came. But they had promised, like two high schoolers after graduation, that they would stay in touch. He had kissed her good-bye on the forehead, and given her a long hug, but nothing more than that had come of their friendship.
They had talked on the phone once a month and emailed each other once a week, for a little over a year, then he stopped calling or answering her calls or returning them, even. She had emailed him--he emailed her back. But six months ago, even they had stopped. She knew that they were friends, but she had secretly hoped against hope that maybe Danny Messer would be more than just a friend some day.
"Hey, Abby! What'cha got there?"
Abby looked up to see Ryan Wolfe standing in the door way. He was young, tall, and handsome. He was intense, and Abby liked that about him. But he wore his emotions on his sleeve. She could read him like a book, and she liked that, too. He was cute and smart and sweet and sometimes funny. She thought that possibly, given different circumstances, they might've dated, but not there. Not while they were both Miami-Dade CSI. That wasn't in the cards for them. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not ever. And Abby was fine with that. She wanted someone else entirely. And he was waiting for her, in New York, she hoped.
"Just my list."
"Of what?" Wolfe asked coming over to the small table and sitting down.
"Things I have to do for the next two weeks."
"You planning a trip?" he asked, eyeing the top of the page where she had jotted down NEW YORK CITY!!
"Um, I'm transfering, actually," Abby answered in one breath.
"Transfering to NYC?" Wolfe asked, even though he already knew the answer.
Abby nodded, avoiding his eyes.
"Just like that?"
"Well, H talked to Detective Taylor and--"
"He needs you?" Wolfe's voice broke.
"Yeah. I'm needed there."
"For CSI work...? Or Profiler work...?"
Abby smiled. "A lil of both, I guess."
"And you'll be seeing Messer, no doubt?" Wolfe asked, almost to himself.
Abby met his eye. "What is that supposed to mean, Ryan?"
"I just--I meant that he's burnt you, Abby. Do you really wanna put yourself in that position again?" Wolfe asked, choosing his words carefully.
Abby tilted her head to the side. "I can handle myself, Ryan. Don't worry about me. I'm a tough girl."
"I know. Believe me... I know." Wolfe grinned. "But I don't want my friends to get hurt on the job or otherwise, ya know?"
"I'm not gonna get hurt. Danny Messer and I are just friends. Ok? So, anytime you feel macho, go take care of Calleigh or Boa Vista, alright?" Abby asked with a grin.
"I got it, Abby." Wolfe returned her grin, as he stood up and headed back to the door. "Oh, you know what we should do?" he asked, turning on his heel. "Have a going away party for you."
Abby laughed. "Ryan...No."
Wolfe nodded as he headed out the door; he got the hint, she didn't want to make a big deal out of her leaving.
After he left, Abby closed her notebook and stretched. New York was going to be good for her. She knew that. She needed to believe that. And soon, she would find the happiness she had been searching for. It had to be in New York.
well, tht's Abby Walker, ya'll. she's a bit of a hopeless romantic, i think & a dreamer. i wanted her to be a Profiler, but when i started writing her parts, in other stories, she actually doesn't behave like a profiler to me, so eventho tht's part of her back-story, she's more into the CSI stuff like everyone else, if tht makes sense. also, i think i suck at writing Miami characters, they always seem a lil OOC to me. i think it might be cos i don't watch the show as much as i used to/watch CSI:NY & they're so over-the-top in general, it's hard for me to write em, cos i always wanna tone em down a bit then i feel weird whenever i do. idk. just hope ya'll like the story so far. next chapter will pick up with the murder investigation. chaio.
