Erm, yeah. This is the result of boredom.

Major. Boredom. It sucks, I don't care.

SCENE: Kakashi is sitting alone at a bar, an entire bottle of booze in front of him. It was basically gone. His hair seemed to be kinda deflated, and he slouched over the bar. The bartender, Homer Simpson, had just taken away his empty booze bottle and was about to give him another when Britney Spears walked in through the door. She had, of course, her kids with her.

Homer ran away.

Kakashi took one look at Britney, whipped out a kunai, threw it at her, and split her head open. Little Preston or whatever the hell the kid's name is fell to the ground. Kakashi passed out.

AND NOW, HERE IS THE REAL STORY!!

Kabuto was strolling along in the park, wondering what he would do to Orochimaru when he got back to the lair, when Kakashi landed in front of him. He let out a scream like a banshee and Kakashi shot him.

YAY KAKASHI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Back off in Konoha, Shikamaru and his father were having an argument.

"But dad, I don't WANT to go to ballet classes every Thursday afternoon!" Shikamaru wailed, sinking into a chair.

"You'll go to the ballet classes and you'll like them!" Shikaku bellowed. An evil grin spread across his face. "If you don't, you won't get to marry Abbie! And you'll inherit my coat that looks like a ripped up potato sack! SO HA!"

Shikamaru gasped, horrified at the thought of losing me (this is my fanfic, I'll write whatever the hell I want). And inheriting the ripped up potato sack.

Just then Choji burst in the room.

"Mr. Nara! I have to talk to you!" Choji gasped, panting. He still managed to shove a few pork rinds in his mouth.

"Well, what is it?" Shikaku asked impatiently, wanting to get back to ballet talk.

"It's about the ballet! Don't make Shikamaru do it!" Choji said between mouthfuls and gasps.

Shikamaru leapt up. "YES!!" he cried, punching his fist into the air.

"Make him take pilates!"

"WHAT?!?!"

Off in the forest…

Jiraiya peered through the bushes, his binoculars smashed up against his eyes. He looked down at the single palmtree-like figure at the waterfall, who was wearing a bikini. Typical.

"Well, that little lady looks awfully lonely," Jiraiya said to himself. "I think I'll go accompany her."

Oh, Jiraiya. :D

The girl was, like I said, palmtree-like in figure. PAY ATTENTION!! But on moving closer, Jiraiya realized it wasn't wearing a bikini. It was wearing a black sports bra and black skort. She had long, stringy black hair, almost dreadlock like.

Jiraiya finally made his way down to wear the girl was standing. Hearing his shoes clacking on the ground, the girl turned around.

"OH. MY. GOD."

A crazy smile lit Envy's face upon hearing Jiraiya's remark.

Okay. I don't feel like writing about Envy anymore. Soooo…

A giant cinder block fell through the sky, landed on Envy, and Envy was basically oozing out from under the cinder block. Yay.

Back in the Nara household…

"Now roll onto your back, raise your hands to the ceiling, inhale, and lift up your head to look at your knees. Exhaling, I want you to raise yourself up until your shoulders have touched your knees."

Shikamaru did as he was told, cursing pilates under his breath. Next to him, Shikaku was very happily doing the exercises.

Choji had passed out from all the exercise minutes ago.

"How troublesome," Shikamaru growled.