Disclaimer: I am in no way affiliated with Grey's Anatomy or ABC. I own no characters except those I have created. I do this only for fun.
A/N: Well, Grey's is back! And i have to say I was not impressed, not at all. But here we go with chapter three of this story! Enjoy!
Once again, thanks for all the feedback - it keeps me running. Oh and I updated my Bio page, which I guess is exciting...
Three Thousand Miles
Chapter Three - Lost?
"Just because I'm losing, doesn't mean I'm lost. Just because I'm hurting, doesn't mean I'm hurt, doesn't mean I didn't get what I deserved."
Meredith, Andy, Emma, and Jilly all walked off the airplane and into the terminal a little discombobulated, a six and a half hour flight can do that to a person. Meredith knew that she had to call Derek now. But she chickened out.
"Hey Andy can you do me a favor and call your father and tell him that we are here?" Meredith asked Andrew.
"Yeah sure mom." Andy said as he pulled out his cell phone and dialed the all too familiar number. As Andy talked to Derek on the phone the family made their way to the baggage claim, "He said that he is already here!" Andy said sounding excited as he hung up the phone.
"Seriously?" Emma asked excited.
"He said he is already at baggage claim and he has our bags! He said that he recognized them because they had the same tags on them that we used to use when we went on vacation." Andrew summarized for everyone.
"Mommy let's go see daddy!" Jilly screamed as she jumped up and down. She may have been ten, but when she got excited she acted younger.
"Alright, let's go" Meredith sighed trying to show some level of enthusiasm.
Andrew led the way and Jilly and Emma followed quickly behind him. Meredith stayed a little further back. She couldn't help but smile, Andrew had his intense hiking backpack on, Emma had her school backpack on, and Jilly had this little yellow knapsack on her back. They were practically running through the airport. They may have all been over the age of ten, but at this moment they were acting like little children in a candy shop trying to get to the perfect piece of candy. They made their way through the airport which Meredith had not been in for five years. She was so unhappy when she was last here.
They finally made it down to baggage claim, and she saw him. He stood tall, his hair was still the perfect wavy dark brown but now it had become a bit salt and peppered. He was wearing jeans and a winter jacked. His eyes looked weary and Derek caught her looking at him and gave her a sad smile. Meredith averted her eyes and she was pretty sure that the kids hadn't seen him yet.
"Hey guys," Meredith got her kids attention, "Look." She pointed her finger to where Derek was.
"Dad!" All three of her kids screamed. Jilly went running to Derek and absolutely tackled him. Derek, strong as ever, picked her up and flung her around in circles. It killed Meredith to see this. Moments like this made her realize she was not the only one in Jilly, Emma, and Andrew's life. Then Andrew and Emma ran over to him, he set Jilly down and gave Andy and Emma a hug at the same time. Jilly held on to his hand. Meredith watched the scene from afar for a couple minutes as Derek and their kids embraced. She held her cell phone in one hand and had her canvass bag on the other shoulder. Soon enough the kids had their luggage and Derek had grabbed Meredith's. Meredith stood still until everyone came over.
"Ready to go mom?" Emma asked as she ran past Meredith with her luggage. Andrew again was leading the way and Derek was carrying Jilly.
"Uh, yeah." Meredith said, "Let's go." At that moment Derek came up to her. He set Jilly down on the ground.
"Hey bug," it sounded so right when he said it, "can you carry your luggage until we get to the car? Go catch up with Andy and Emma."
"Okay daddy!" Jilly replied and took her rolly suitcase and ran off to where Andy and Emma were up ahead. As she ran past Meredith, Meredith ran her hands through Jilly's thick dirty blonde hair, Derek's perfect hair she noted. At that moment Derek was right in front of Meredith, he set down her luggage and sighed.
"Hi," he smiled. His McDreamy smile. Meredith had missed it so much.
"Hi," she gave him a weak smile back. Meredith bent down to get her luggage off the ground but as she did she felt Derek's hand over hers. The feeling that it procreated startled her and she jumped back a bit.
"It's okay," Derek smiled again, "I've got it." He picked up the luggage, of course he would, he's chivalrous and he's Derek.
"Thanks, you don't have to." Meredith told him sincerely.
"It's okay, I don't mind." Derek smiled again and started to walk alongside Meredith, "How are you?"
"Me?" Meredith asked nervous, "Yeah I'm fine. I'm good. I…" she was at a loss for words, she then realized she had actually missed him.
"Me too." Derek said as if something had been unsaid but he got it.
Meredith nodded and the two of them walked out of Seattle-Tachoma together meeting their kids at the sidewalk.
"Daddy, how's Boomer?" Jilly asked as the five of them sat squished in Derek's Land Rover as they made their way back to the house.
"Boomer's great." Derek said looking in the rear view mirror at his daughter who was sitting in the way-back, "He is going to be so excited to see all of you."
"Mom, what are we doing tonight?" Emma asked from the backseat.
Meredith was sitting up front next to Derek, "Uh, I think you guys are just going to stay in with your dad tonight. I am going to go visit Aunt Christina."
"Oh okay, well then Dad what are we doing tonight?" Emma asked her father.
"I was thinking a movie and some take-out Chinese." Derek said.
"From Chen-Yang Li?" Andrew questioned.
"Of course." Derek smiled. And so did Meredith at how truly happy Derek could make the kids.
"Let's do it!" Emma exclaimed.
"Alright, to Chen-Yang Li we go," Derek then looked over at Meredith, "you don't mind if we make this quick stop, we'll just get the take-out and then we'll be on our way."
"No, it's fine." Meredith said trying to put on a smile.
As Derek drove in the direction of the kid's favorite Chinese restaurant, Meredith stared out the window. She was half listening to Derek talking to the kids in the background. Meredith couldn't help but notice how nothing had really changed in Seattle. All of the roads looked familiar. These were the roads she would travel every day. She never pictured herself being away from Seattle for so long. Five years was a long time. There were things she missed. She missed how pretty Seattle was, it was more forest-y than Boston. She loved the colors and she actually did love the rain. But most of all she missed this, sitting in the car as a family, just being a family in general. She missed seeing her kids as happy as they were with Derek. Meredith had promised to herself before they left Boston that she would not spend too much time thinking about Derek. It was harder than she thought it was going to be.
Meredith was sitting in a parked car alone outside of the Chinese restaurant that she had detested so fondly back when she was living in Seattle, now she abhorred it even more. Derek and the kids had all gone in to get their food. Pretty soon after they had gone in, Meredith took out her cell phone and called Christina.
"Hello?" Christina picked up her phone on the other line, she was working at the hospital today.
"Hey," Meredith said.
"Meredith! Are you here?" Christina asked sounding excited.
"I am. I am currently at a Chinese restaurant." Meredith sighed.
"You hate Chinese food." Christina stated the obvious.
"The kids wanted it – it was Derek's idea." Meredith explained.
"Asshole." Christina replied. When it came to Derek, the answer was pure and simple: asshole.
"Yeah well. He was just trying to be nice. Remember, this trip is about getting over the whole asshole bit." Meredith and Christina had discussed this before.
"So, you're coming tonight?" Christina asked.
"Yeah, Joe's at seven?" Meredith asked.
"Yep," Christina answered.
"I'll be there, anything to get away form this situation." Meredith sighed.
"Is it awkward?" Christina asked.
"Oh yeah." Meredith answered and then she spotted Derek walking out of the restaurant with Jilly jumping around him, Emma to his left and Andrew to his right, all with plastic bags with revolting Chinese food in hand, "Oh crap! They're coming back, I've got to go. See you tonight." Meredith quickly said.
"Yeah, see you tonight." Christina replied, but Meredith had already hung up the phone. Derek and the kids piled back into the car and soon enough they were on their way.
"Who were you talking to?" Emma asked her mom from the backseat.
"Oh, Aunt Christina," Meredith replied.
"So you're going to see her tonight?" Derek asked casually.
"Uh, yeah. We're going down to Joe's. But I'll be back, after, I mean." Meredith responded carefully and awkwardly. It was almost as if she and Derek were walking on egg shells.
The family continued their ride in silence. Meredith stared out the window. She could not believe she was going to her old house, well now Derek's house. She could not believe she had agreed to stay with him. Sure the house was big, she had been there when they built it and planned it. She remembered how she only wanted four bedrooms but Derek had insisted on a fifth, just in case they needed a guest room. Meredith had said that it was a waste; they would never have any use for a spear bedroom. Somehow Derek had known they would, she almost wondered if he could have sensed the future back then. She loved that house, everything about it. It was beautiful and spacious. Her house outside of Boston was nice too maybe even nicer, but it did not have that home-y quality. When the kids were younger and Meredith and Derek had flexible schedules, she used to love to come home from the hospital to the sight of Andy coming up and running to her his hands covered in paint. Jilly at that point was just an infant, and as soon as Meredith would come home she would start screaming and crying wanting out of her playpen or crib. She missed seeing Emma running around the house also with paint on her hands trying to touch anything in sight. And she missed Derek running around after them trying to restore order. It was chaotic, but that was life. Meredith's life in Boston was decently orderly. The kids all had their activities; she had her time at the hospital. It was very structured and scheduled. Life in Seattle before things fell apart was hectic, spontaneous, and more importantly, fun. Meredith missed that.
Derek had finally reached the long driveway that pulled up to the house. Meredith had forgotten how truly secluded the house really was. As they drove up to the nearly 4,000 square foot domicile Meredith felt all sorts of emotions flowing through her. Nothing had changed. That killed her. She almost wished he had changed the color or added an addition just so she could see that there was something different in his life. But it was exactly the same. The trees were all the same. They breathtaking view overlooking the water was the same. The bird feeder that Andrew had made when he was in first grade still hung in one of the trees. The basketball hoop that Emma and Andrew had insisted on buying was still in the driveway. Their old swing set was still in the backyard. The tree house (or tree condo as Meredith liked to call it) that Derek and Mark spent weeks creating still was in the trees and the tire swing still came down from it. Derek had even decorated the house with lights for Christmas.
"Dad it looks so pretty!" Emma exclaimed as her eyes lit up from the backseat.
"It looks the same as it did a couple summers ago. You've changed nothing, dad. Well, you added the lights for Christmas." Andrew commented as Derek opened the garage and pulled the car in.
"You still have our old skis?" Jilly asked.
"Yep, I was thinking maybe we could actually take a trip up to Canada, maybe go skiing this weekend." Derek said.
"Sweet!" Emma exclaimed.
"Daddy, I don't think my skis would fit me." Jilly sighed.
"Oh well, we can rent some Jilly." Derek answered as he hopped out of the car.
Everyone climbed out of Derek's car and grabbed their luggage. Meredith reluctantly got out of the passenger seat and saw that Derek had taken her luggage already. The kids had already bounded inside, Derek was close behind them. Meredith took a second to take in her surroundings. The garage was cleaner than it had been five years ago. She assumed that was because all of the kids' stuff was not lying around to clutter everywhere. Meredith lingered for a moment but then mustered up the confidence to walk through the storm door which lead to the kitchen. She walked up the steps and pushed open the door, she felt something she had not in a while: home.
Meredith was sure it was the smell. The smell triggered that homeliness feeling. It smelled like her old days at Seattle Grace, but most of all it smelled of Derek. She looked around, the first thing to catch her eye was the refrigerator. That was new. It was some kind of new fridge that had a TV built into it. Meredith could not believe that Derek had bought that. The fridge was covered in pictures of the kids, old and new. One old family picture caught her eye. It was about eight years ago, she knew because she had a copy of it tucked away in her desk; the thing that got her was how in that picture Derek's arm was around her shoulder casually and her hand was holding his. He had it on the fridge, she just couldn't get over it. Suddenly, she was distracted by something, a loud bark and the sound of a jingling dog collar.
"Boomer!" Emma shouted. The nine-year old golden retriever came into the kitchen. Meredith noticed that he had aged. They fur around his snout had turned white. Meredith remembered how desperately Andrew and Derek had wanted a dog, she had finally given in. Derek insisted on getting a golden retriever puppy, after all that is what he had growing up. Meredith warmed up to Boomer really quickly. She watched as Emma, Andrew, and Jilly got reacquainted with Boomer. She went over the dog and rubbed his head. He kissed her, almost as if he remembered her. Meredith glanced down at her watch briefly. She realized that she had told Christina she would be there at 7:00, it was now 6:40. She was going to be late, no doubt about it.
"Sorry guys I've got to go." Meredith excused herself.
"We just got here mom!" Andrew protested.
"I know, but I told your Aunt Christina and Aunt Izzie that I would be there at 7:00." Meredith explained. She did not want to make it look like she was purposely avoiding being together as a family.
"I want to see Aunt Christina and Aunt Izzie!" Jilly complained.
"You'll see them tomorrow jello, I promise." Derek smiled as he picked Jilly up and set her on the counter. This caught Meredith's attention; Jilly was too heavy for Meredith to carry around now, but not for Derek.
"Bye mom, see you later." Emma hugged Meredith. Meredith proceeded to give Andrew a hug and then Jilly a hug.
"See you guys later!" Meredith smiled as she grabbed her purse and walked out of the house.
"Meredith! Wait!" Derek called, Meredith was already in the garage, "I'll be right back guys, why don't you go up to your rooms and unpack." Derek suggested as he ran after Meredith. Emma, Jilly, and Andrew shrugged and made their way upstairs. Derek went into the garage and saw that Meredith was already walking out, "Meredith!" Derek called again. Meredith turned around, "Where are you going?" Derek quickly caught up with her.
"What do you mean? I am going to see Richard." Meredith stated the obvious.
"I know that, but how are you going to get there?" Derek asked.
"I just called a cab, I was going to meet them at the end of the street considering no one can ever find the house." Meredith stated.
"Oh come on, I still have the old cars, at least take your old Jeep." Derek pleaded. This was an odd conversation.
"Derek, that thing is over twenty years old." Meredith rolled her eyes. Derek's eyes lightened a bit when he heard his name come out of her mouth.
"I just thought…" he paused for a second and looked down, "I thought maybe it would be easier for you, if you have your old car." Derek finished. This was the longest conversation they had that was not about the kids in a long time.
Meredith stared at him for a second. Derek stared at Meredith, his look was pleading, almost as if the this conversation was not just about the car. Meredith thought about the jeep, and the last time they had been in the car.
June 2022
Meredith and Derek sat in Meredith's old dilapidated jeep. They were on their way to a Seattle Courthouse. Derek had wanted to save the jeep, he always wanted an antique, even if it was a jeep. Derek was driving and Meredith was in the passenger seat. Andrew, Emma, and Jilly were at home. Andrew was supposed to be watching everyone. Meredith sat next to Derek in the seat. They were both dressed to the nines, Meredith's high heeled foot was tapping nervously on the floor of the car.
"It will be fine," Derek tried to comfort his wife.
"How can it be fine? You could lose your job, I could lose your job. We could lose our licenses!" Meredith started to scream a bit.
"Calm down, everything will resolve itself over time." Derek was used to having to comfort Meredith about this.
"Derek! How can you be so calm?" Meredith convicted. "We should have thought about what we were doing before we did it."
"Meredith, we hired Seattle's best lawyer, the story has not come out in the media yet, and I do not care what anyone says: there is no shame or crime in helping someone in need." Derek finished, placing a comforting hand on Meredith's thigh. Meredith winced a bit at the physical contact, something they were not so accustomed to recently.
They continued their drive in silence. Little did Meredith know, the trial would not go so well, no one ever found out the "crimes" they committed, it was kept quiet, but bad news would come out of the trial - maybe not for their careers, but for them personally. And little did Meredith know, this would be the last time she and Derek sat together in her old Jeep.
December 2027
"Yeah, fine. I'll take the jeep." Meredith agreed after coming back to reality.
"Good, good." Derek smiled a bit, Meredith looked down. "I'll go get your keys." Derek ran back into the house while Meredith stood on the driveway in a pensive state. She looked around, she missed this. She did not want to let herself miss it but she did. Most of all she missed Derek's smile. She regained composure quickly and noticed Derek had new cars, she saw them through the three car garage. She smiled to herself, there was something about that man and cars.
Especially old jeeps.
Keep the reviews coming! They get me excited! And stay tuned...
Oh I need help - do you think I should have Christina married to Owen Hunt (army doc), or not married at all? It's up to you...
Lost? is a song by Coldplay off of their Viva la Vida album.
