Disclaimer: I don't own ER, or any characters you recognise.
Hi all! Thank you some much for all the wonderful reviews!
Just to make this clear - I have no medical knowledge, just way too much time to search the internet. Sorry for any inaccuracies.
Enjoy!
Despite Kerry's advice, Ray returns to work as soon as they finish their meeting. He isn't any worse off than he was an hour ago, so why should he go home early?
"Ray." Luka calls out to Ray as he grabs a chart, and strides towards one of the exam rooms. "Wait for a minute."
Ray stops, and turns around to Luka. And pretending that everything is alright, and he hasn't just been diagnosed with a terminal illness, he says. "What's up?"
As Luka closes the distance between them, he says. "I just wanted to check that you didn't want to go home, Kerry said you might."
"Well I don't need to, and I'm not." Ray says, not giving anything away.
"Okay, what did Weaver want to talk to you about anyway?" Luka enquires.
Ray puts his hand behind his back to hide a severe cramp as he says. "Nothing important." Ray says, finding it all too easy to lie about his newfound illness.
"Alright then, I'll let you get back to your patients." Luka says as he starts to walk away, he then turns around, and says. "You know you can come to me if you need to talk?"
"Yeah." Ray replies, nodding, before going back to work.
Over the next six months Ray's condition continues to progress, unknown to his co-workers, and even to Neela, his roommate, he has a PEG tube surgically placed in his stomach, and has to use a bi-pap mask at night.
He manages to hide his condition at work, and function as normal until one fateful morning. Ray has been on shift for fourteen hours, and he can barely move as he gets ready to leave when the call comes in, there's been a mass casualty incident, all hands on deck.
As the trauma patients start rolling in, Ray is assigned to a critical patient. He and Sam take the patient into a trauma room, and they've barely begun the primary survey when Ray suddenly can't support himself, and he falls, directly onto the patient's fractured pelvis, just as Luka is walking into the room.
"What the hell are you doing, Ray?!" Luka demands as Sam helps Ray off the patient, and over to a stool.
Ray looks up weakly from where he is sitting. "I slipped."
"Go wait at the admit desk, I'll deal with you once we've handled all the traumas." Luka orders angrily.
Without comment, Ray shakily stands, and walks tentatively out of the room.
It is almost six hours later when Luka finally goes over to Ray, who as ordered is still sitting at the admit desk.
By now Ray is on the verge of collapse, and should probably be a patient, not a doctor.
Luka doesn't waste anytime in telling Ray. "Go home, Barnett. I'm suspending you until I can work out what to do."
This is the last straw for Ray, he has gone six months with no mistakes and now one little slip is going to ruin everything. "Don't bother. I quit!" Ray says angrily, cursing his slightly slurred speech as he does so.
Before Luka can say anything, Ray takes off as quickly as he can, and barely a moment later, Neela notices what's going on, and follows him.
Neela spots Ray just as she reaches the top of the EL platform stairs, and she couldn't be more shocked. At the moment she lays eyes on him, Ray jumps forward into the path of one of the fast moving trains, and she could swear that her heart stopped in that moment, but thankfully a couple of bystanders see what's happening, and pull him out of the trains path just seconds before it rushes through.
Neela puts her hand to her chest as she runs over to where Ray is now sitting between the two complete strangers who've just saved his life. "Ray!"
He barely even looks in her direction as she kneels down beside him.
"What is wrong with you?!" She demands still shaken.
Again, he says nothing.
Neela looks up at the two men, and asks. "Can you help me get him over to a bench? He's a friend of mine."
The men nod, and then promptly hoist Ray up between them, and half carry him over to the nearest bench. After Neela says her thanks, they walk away.
Neela then sits down beside Ray, and forces him to look at her as she repeats. "What is wrong with you?"
"Lemme 'lone, Neela." As soon as the words leave his mouth, Ray curses himself, she has heard him slur his speech.
Neela looks on the verge of tears as he says. "Are you alright, Ray? Please talk to me."
Ray takes a moment to calm himself before, almost coldly he says. "I am fine. Just leave me alone." He pauses, and then adds. "I am moving out of the apartment."
Neela nearly falls off the bench in shock. Why is he doing this? It doesn't make any sense! "What?"
Ray doesn't reply, he takes a moment to prepare himself, and then stands up, and begins to walk away.
"Ray! Where are you going?! Come back here!" Neela yells at him as he walks towards the train, and climbs aboard, never looking back at her.
Several weeks later, Ray takes a taxi out of the city, to a small private hospice. He knows that his condition has reached a point where he can no longer take care of himself.
When he enters the centre, a kind looking older woman greets Ray from her position behind the reception desk. "Hello, how may I help you?"
Ray takes a deep breath, and lets it out with a sigh as he says. "I'm Ray Barnett, I've made arrangements to check in here."
TBC...
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