I hope that everyone had a happy and safe holiday season. I would like to take a moment to explain my absence due to a lack of inspiration and tough work related to school. School is where I'll be until summer, so my updates will be few and far between unless inspiration or plot bunnies hit.

Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon in any way, shape or form.


(Part XV: Housetraining) Written by Brock Stone.

Within this world there are many people who choose to live with pokemon in some way: some by battling, some by coordinating, and some by studying them. The vast majority of pokemon can also be found living in homes. And, especially living in the suburbs and urban areas, proper behavior is expected. Though landlords may not discriminate against those with pokemon, they still have the right to kick you out should your pokemon cause problems.

Officer Jenny looked upon the tiny Growlithe puppy that panted and wagged his tail at her feet. She smiled; then she took notice of the large mess that the pup had caused. Garbage was strewn about the hardwood floors and the bin itself was melted beyond repair from the fire pokemon's embers. The police officer had arrived just in time to prevent the small embers from setting the scattered newspapers on fire, but not in time to prevent the setting off of the whole complex's fire sprinklers.

She turned her soaked head and watched as the Growlithe yipped and bounded around the kitchen floors in the sprinkler's spray. He lapped up a puddle of water near her feet, then made another of his own nearby.

That was when the shriek of the fire alarm shocked him into howling along.

A bored pokemon is a pokemon that causes trouble. Be sure to leave enough toys or other things so that your pokemon stays active enough to stay out of trouble.

"Grow! Grow wow woooow!"

Jenny sighed and sat up in bed, turning to look at the puppy as he barked at the moon outside the window. She heard the neighbors next door threatening her, and the ones above her were banging on the floor. A minute later she received a warning from the curler-sporting landlady.

She invited the puppy to sleep on her bed and closed the curtains, hoping that the little fire dog would let her get some decent sleep that night.

"Owwwwww! Growwww!" Growlithe barked at the sound of a fire truck's whine, then at the sound of somebody's bass-filled rap music, and finally barked at the pounding that resumed on the wall.

"Shut that miserable pup up already!"

When the problem pokemon is a canine, remember that newspaper is your best friend. When the pokemon is feline, a canister of beads or noisy rattle will do. The treatment depends on the pokemon's species. The trick is not violence and fear, but irritation.

The blue-haired officer looked around the corner, watching the puppy wag his tail and look eagerly up at the brand new garbage pail. She waited until he was about to leap before she jumped out and brandished the rolled-up newspaper.

"No, bad Growlithe!"

She was not expecting the startled fire pokemon to unleash a basic ember attack in defense. He then piddled in fright on the hardwood floor.

Also, depending on the species, you may want to take precautions against attack. And newspaper is still your best friend.

After three weeks, Officer Jenny had succeeded in curtailing the Growlithe's garbage-diving and nighttime howling with a few regressions here and there. Newspaper had solved that problem, but now the officer had to solve a final problem before her landlady came by for an inspection.

She had to get the Growlithe to use the "wonder paper" instead of going on the floor wherever he pleased.

He no longer piddled in fright; she just had to get him to use the paper in other situations. It took painstaking work, and many rugs were ruined in the process, but the persistant cop finally achieved her goal. Her system of tough love had the canine pokemon going on the paper instead of on the floor, the bed, the couch, and almost any other surface within reach.

It was with great confidence that Officer Jenny opened the door smugly to allow her landlady access to the apartment.

It was with great regret that Officer Jenny realized too late that the puppy pokemon was not trained to heel, and she watched in horror as the tiny puppy tackled the landlady in order to plant slobbery kisses all over her face and nip at her hands.

The cop had thirty days to find other quarters.

It is very important to test out your training with friends and family who understand before introducing your pokemon to your boss or landlord. Newspaper is your handy, versatile best friend. If worst comes to worst you may also resort to the pokeball, as long as the pokemon can tolerate it.