Every time Edward's hand touched my shoulder I grew more and more nervous, every time his fingers grazed my cheek, I fell harder. We both wanted more, but focused on anything other than that reality. I kept my eyes focused on the television screen, but my body moved towards his. I leaned into him, and what started out as simply taking a sip of a drink turned into a nervous habit, something to distract myself from how intense the night had become. He was so obvious in his desires, the way his breaths were spaced apart, his pulse increasing speed and then slowing down after he had mentally scolded himself. I was the picture of cool, unmoved confidence.
That was, until he moved in for my hand.
The moment his thumb touched my hand, without thinking, my hand responded. My fingers intertwined with his, my thumb rubbing back gently. It was the moment, I think, where things crossed the line for me. Where the flame was burning and the thoughts of our flirtation went from fun and innocent to this could really be something. I was a twenty-something, in love with my career, and not looking for The One. I didn't need male validation. I enjoyed flirting. But this, sitting on that couch with him, my hand in his hand, was more than I was used to.
I sighed deeply, resting my head against his, and turned my focus from our hands (still holding) to the television. Commercials. I never cared for them. I was a channel surfer - I called it my Radio ADD - I could never stay on one station, I always needed to see if something better was playing elsewhere. Same went for commercials. Amidst the advertisements for Macy's One Day Sale, and a new mascara from L'Oreal, came a compilation CD commercial. He automatically sang with the television, quietly, switching along with each song. Singing into my ear. His voice so deep, almost deeper and more raw at that low of a decibel. I smiled to myself and he wrapped me in his arms tightly, and I grabbed onto his bicep and squeezed. He kissed my temple and I snuggled deeper into his chest.
He let out a small whimper, and took a deep breath. I said nothing, but thought yes, oh god. I want you too.
My body ached for him... and I did everything in my power to control that. Things were about to get complicated.