I'm baaack! :] How is everybody? Sorry this chapter took me so long, I just couldn't bring myself to find the proper ending. I know, shame on me! But hopefully you'll find it to your liking. Enjoy!
Chapter Four
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Three days...
It had been three days since Megumi had stopped by for supper, and Kenshin was still at a loss for ways to tell Kaoru how much she meant to him. Kenshin's violet eyes rested on the rippling river. He watched the fish swim to the surface and back down to the rocks. There was a cool breeze that rustled the leaves on the trees. It was a calm day, but no matter how much he meditated... He still had the gift he had carefully chosen for her tucked away in his room, and that was where it would sit until he came up with an idea. This is pointless. The redhead frowned and stood. I need to think of something soon, or it may be too late. Kaoru hadn't said a word to him since that night, when she had said there was nothing to forgive. Yet she said nothing to him, not one word. It was... frustrating, to say the least. It had to end.
Kenshin walked toward the bridge, somewhat angry at himself. He had to let her run away... There had to be something he could do... He didn't want something over dramatic, or too... forward. A romantic dinner sounded nice, but how could he set up and keep the food warm until they arrived? A long walk, maybe to their place, with all the fireflies. Then again, she might run off again, thinking he would leave. At the upcoming festival? No, it wouldn't take place for weeks. Maybe one of their friends could give him ideas. He slowly walked, listening to the sounds of his sandals against the dirt path. It had to be special, something she would never forget. Something that would bring back the warm glow her eyes always held. Thinking of her beautiful smile, her lively eyes, her warm spirit... It brought back his determination. With new enthusiasm, he headed to the Akabeko.
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Kaoru frowned to herself. It was late now, the stars were out in the sky. Where is Kenshin? It's late, he's normally home by now. She shook her head and began walking to the gate. She was still a bit angry, but Kenshin hadn't tried talking to her at all, so she figured he really did just want to forget about what he'd read. It scared her; If Kenshin left her again, everyone else would slowly leave as well. She didn't want to be alone again, it had been her biggest fear since her father had passed on during the war. As many sins as Kenshin carried on his back, as much blood as he saw on his hands, the depth of his sorrow matched her own. Her mother had died when she was young, died in her father's arms. For nights on end she would lie in bed and listen to her father's sobs and cries, his pleas to bring his beloved wife back to the world of the living. After months of this, he had receded into silence, speaking not even to his own daughter unless it was to correct something she did. Finally Kaoru brought back her father's life, and they lived happily together. Until the war.
Until the war.
Kaoru's eyes began to cloud with tears. She reached for her purple notebook and, despite the recent upset, began to write.
I know it's silly, but I still feel resentment towards Kenshin. I love him so much, that's the problem. He knows now, after reading this. I don't know if he'll ever speak to me the same way. I am no child, nor do I wish to be treated like one. I don't know what I would do if I lost him, yet...
I have been thinking about my father again. The days after mother died, and before he left for war. I cannot remember most of the happy times we had. I do remember one night, however, that father took mother and I out to watch the fireflies at the river. I remember the tender way they looked at each other, at me. Someday I hope to share the same look with a husband of my own, and for my child to observe and remember. Hopefully they would remember out of happiness instead of pain.
I don't care who reads this anymore. I love you Kenshin... I just hope you figure out what to do before it's too late... Or I gain the courage to.
Kaoru held the notebook on her lap, quietly staring out into space. She breathed slowly to calm her racing heart. Kenshin...
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It had been two days since she had written her last entry. The notebook hadn't been touched, she'd placed it in a special place so she could recognize if it had been. Softly she tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ear. That warm day she had decided to leave her silky raven hair down. Two days, and still Kenshin was silent. They exchanged awkward glances every now and then, but no words. Daily life went on, chores were completed, practice was done... The sun was beginning to set and Kaoru was, once again, sitting outside looking up to the sky.
Kenshin watched the young woman with loving violet eyes. He sucked in a breath, trying to calm his heart. He needed to snap out of it! Tonight was the night. Tonight. The swordsman approached her slowly, watching every breath the took. "Kaoru?" The woman looked up, her raven hair shining against the light. She had her hands in her lap, and her pale face glowed softly. Kenshin's breath caught in his throat. Beautiful... He swallowed nervously, but continued. "Miss Kaoru, will you come with me? There is something I wish to show you." He watched as the woman seemed to contemplate it, then stood and nodded at him.
Side by side the two walked slowly to the river, the whole time attempting to stop their wildly beating hearts. Kaoru was dreading those words she had nightmares about in the dark night. I am a wanderer, Miss Kaoru. She didn't know if she could take his leaving. It was true she loved him, but if he wanted nothing more than friendship from her, she would accept it happily. If nothing else, she could live and watch him be content in his life. But secretly she knew that if he found another woman, she wouldn't be able to stay and watch him continue living.
Kenshin stopped by the river, looking out at the rippling water before speaking. "Miss Kaoru, I know you must be furious with me right now, but please let this one explain." When the woman simply looked at him, he continued. "This one had no intent of reading your personal thoughts. When I opened it, I glanced upon my name and couldn't resist reading. It was my weakness, and I will never forgive myself for invading your privacy." He paused, glancing up into her blue eyes. "Kaoru... this one is also not sorry." The dojo owner widened her eyes in confusion, but the man held up a hand to silence her. "I am not sorry, because it opened my eyes. This one now realizes that you are not a little girl, but a blossoming woman. That for these many years this one has been lucky to not have had you snatched away by a younger, persistent suitor. I have been selfish these years, Kaoru." He looked up at the stars sparkling against the black night sky. "I have been wallowing in my past, afraid of things to repeat themselves. But I realize you are not like my first wife, Tomoe. You are stronger, in many different ways. I have been avoiding the truth of my heart out of fear you will be taken from me." Kenshin's red hair shaded his eyes for a moment, before he looked up into her eyes. "But I realize if I continue to wait, you will be taken from me regardless. Kaoru... You have kept me alive for all these years, slowly letting my old wounds heal."
Kenshin walked to her and took her soft hand gently in his own. "I cannot lie to you, or myself, any longer. Kaoru, I love you." He waited for Kaoru's reaction nervously. Her blue eyes were wide and sparkling. Her cheeks were flushed slightly, her hair fluttering behind her, her mouth was parted slightly. She couldn't stop her heart from pounding.
"Kenshin..." She began to cry. The warm tears poured from the corners of her eyes. Kenshin took her gently into his embrace, rocking her slowly and praying that it was a good reaction. He lifted his head from hers when she mumbled something inaudible.
"What is it Kaoru?"
She shook her head, as if making a decision. She looked up into his violet eyes fiercely and clenched her fists, which were resting against his chest. She rose up on her toes and gently pressed her lips against his own. His eyes widened in shock. Kaoru... He tightened his hold on her. He let his eyes slip closed and tilted his head, gently using his tongue to pry open her mouth. She was a little confused, but let him in. She was shocked at the electricity of his touches, the wonderful feelings a simple kiss elicted. His tongue moved against hers sensually, his hands kneading her back softly. Slowly Kaoru's hands moved up to cradle the redhead's face as she returned the kiss with equal fervor. Kenshin broke the kiss, moving his face to her neck. He kissed it softly over and over, only stopping when he heard the young woman moan.
"Kenshin..."
He looked down at her face. Her eyes were barely open, her cheeks flushed pink, and her lips swollen, red. "Kaoru," he whispered worriedly. "Did I-"
"Ssshh." She placed a finger to his lips, her deep blue eyes sparkling with happiness. "I love you Kenshin."
His heart erupted with a feeling he couldn't put words to. Kaoru's head rested in the cradle of his neck, her warm breath tickling the skin. He smiled and kissed the top of her head, holding her close and rocking her gently. This feeling was nothing he had ever felt before. There had always been pleasure with Tomoe, her kisses intense and forceful. It was different with Kaoru. He felt love, wanting, happiness in her kisses. Her touch wasn't needy, it was tender and kind. Her voice wasn't harsh, it was soft and understanding. Her smiles weren't cynical or cruel, they were loving and true. Nothing could break this feeling. Kaoru...
Kenshin pulled away softly. "Let's go home... Kaoru." Her eyes softened and she nodded, allowing him to lace his fingers through hers as they walked home slowly. The wind whispered through their hair, gently carrying the flower pedals down to the ground around the couple. The crickets chirped softly, and before they reached the entrance Kenshin tugged lightly at Kaoru's hand. "Kaoru... I wish to ask you something."
Kaoru looked at him quizzically. Before she could say anything, however, Kenshin pulled a small box out of his pocket and smiled. "Kaoru, I promise to spend the rest of my life here, with you. I have wandered to the place I will spend the rest of my life, if you will allow me to. I know it's soon, but I don't want you to wait any longer." He handed her the box, nodding for her to open it. She pulled the ribbon gently and pulled off the top of the box. She gasped, staring with disbelieving eyes. Kenshin fell to one knee, taking her hand in his own. "Kaoru, would you take my hand in marriage?"
Kaoru couldn't rip her eyes away from the gift. It was a beautiful silver ring, a full sapphire embedded in the ring with two amethysts on both sides. It sparkled in the starlight, glittering and shining with radiance. Kaoru fell to the ground in front of the swordsman, smiling and embracing him tightly. "Kenshin... Oh Kensh- of course! I will! I mean, yes! Yes I'll marry you! I-"
Kenshin stood and picked her up, spinning her around and around until it made them dizzy. He set her down gently and took the ring. He gazed lovingly at her, and slipped the ring onto her finger. They shared a simple kiss before heading into the dojo, smiling and holding hands. The wind continued to blow softly outside.
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Kaoru was finally alone. It was going to be the most precious day of her life, or one of them. It was her wedding day. She had Megumi, Tae, Misao, and Tsubame all helping her prepare, some keeping the men out of the way and other helping her dress in the intricate wedding kimono. There were layers upon layers, but oh how beautiful they were... She knew Kenshin would be wearing blue, so naturally she would be wearing blue as well. The very top layer was the most eye-catching - a cerulean blue with silver petals floating down the skirt, and a curl of vines crawling up the side. She had picked it specially, from the descriptions her father used to tell her at night, it nearly matched what her mother had worn on her own special day. Kaoru's silky raven hair was done up in curls, propped on her head. She didn't know how Megumi had gotten it to stay, but it was beautiful. The silver hair comb matched perfectly with it's deep sapphire gems embedded in it. She was... I hope Kenshin will approve... She blushed, wondering what Kenshin would say.
She sighed and looked around the empty room, seeing nobody but herself in the mirror's reflection. Slowly she pulled her purple lacy notebook from it's hiding spot and began to write, careful not to get ink on her kimono.
Today is the day I've been dreaming of for years now - the day I marry Kenshin. I can't believe it's actually happening, I never believed I could possibly know the love that Kenshin and I share. I truly believe, mom, that you would be proud of me. You always said that it was important to belong to your lover, yet be an independent woman. Well, the dojo is doing well - I have more students than I have had in a long time, and they are all so dedicated! Father would be proud.
Kenshin and I have not shared that 'special moment' yet, however I know tonight will be the night, and mom - I'm so nervous! I wish you were here to guide me, to reassure me... So many things you could teach me now. Though you are beyond my grasp now, I know you are always in my heart, and for that I am grateful. I hope you are proud of me mom. I hope you and father approve of Kenshin - he's such a wonderful man. I know he'll be a good father, and he's already proven to be loving to me. My heart can only get full from here.
I know nothing of pleasing a man, and mother I hope I do well. Were you nervous as well? Were you, too, innocent to the ways of marriage? Kenshin will understand, won't he? After all, he was married once before. I know he says his love for me is nothing like his for Tomoe, but I pray I will stay strong. Do you believe I will be a good wife? I know I cannot cook, and my lady skills are near to nothing, but with love won't I be able to make him happy? Do you believe I can do this?
I do, mom. I know I will make a good wife, and if you are in heaven shaking your head at me - I promise I will prove myself. I will be the honorable daughter you and father always pushed me to be. I will be a good wife, mother, and daughter. Please believe in me.
And to think - we're getting married because he read this little book I'm writing in now...
I must go now - it is almost time. My heart won't stop pounding! I pray I have your blessings.
Slowly she closed the book and returned it to it's rightful spot. She rose and opened the shoji, letting the sun shine down on her face. Kaoru sighed deeply and smiled happily. "Things can only get better from here."
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It's finished!! I really enjoyed writing this - though hopefully my next story can make it past four chapters... o.o I really hope you enjoyed this! Please leave your lovely comments and reviews! Oh, and yes There will be an epilogue.I just don't know when that will be coming, hopefully soon! :]
