Long Road Back Part 4
Sara spent much of the day and night going between both rooms. Neither showed any movement or awareness. On her last visit to Angel's room she noticed a small turn of her head. She stood up and tried talking to her. Angel finally opened her eyes and Sara noticed the pained look on her face. She pushed the nurses call button.
After a minute or so recognition crossed Angel's face. Sara noticed tears beginning to form. Like Mark she saw her hand come up to remove the mask but couldn't because of her bandaged hands that looked more like mitts. Sara pulled the mask away.
"Mark?" she whispered.
"He's ok. He talked to me a while ago." Sara said stroking her hair.
"His legs?" Sara could barely hear her and didn't want to tell her the truth.
"You did everything right. You probably saved his life" She tried to say gently.
Angel shook her head and turned away. This was the moment she was afraid of more than anything.
"I'm sorry," she muttered, still looking away. "I shouldn't have moved him," she cursed to herself.
"It was an accident. It could have happened to anyone. It wasn't your fault." Angel still couldn't look at her.
"Where is Adam?"
"Vince got hold of him an hour ago. He is on the first flight out this morning. He will be here soon." She added hoping it would help.
A nurse walked in and checked her vital signs and made notes on her chart. She pulled out a needle and put it in the IV port.
"What is that?" Angel asked.
"Don't worry, its something for the pain." The nurse said.
"No, I don't want anything" she practically yelled.
"The doctor ordered it for when you wake up. It will help." She said very condescendingly and then patted her arm and walked away with a smile.
Sara asked her what happened. She tried to remember what she could. Halfway during her conversation her words slurred and Sara noticed a glaze of her eyes. She thought briefly that it was strange, but assumed it was tiredness. After another minute Angel closed her eyes and fell asleep. Sara put the mask back on and turned to take the long walk down the hall again.
When she got there she noticed the doctor was in the room.
"How is he?" she asked worriedly.
"He is sleeping. We are giving him something for the pain. He is doing well. When he wakes up push the button and we will see how his legs are." He smiled and gave her arm a squeeze and walked out the door.
Sara sat down in the chair next to him and fell asleep. It was a restless sleep in which she could hear every noise in the room and hallway. Somewhere in the back of her mind she heard his voice.
"Sara" he whispered.
Instantly she was up and at his side. She pushed the button.
"How do you feel?" she smiled at him. He rolled his eyes at the joke.
"How do I look?" he said just as sarcastically.
"Handsome as ever" she shot back.
She reached down and kissed him and he kissed her back.
"How is Angel?" he asked again. She wondered to herself if he was ready for the truth but she knew that was what he always wanted.
"She has a broken finger, and she was hypothermic." She said hoping it would be enough.
"What else?" he asked knowing there was more just by the look on her face.
"What do you remember?" she asked him.
"Not much. I remember hitting some ice but I never saw it. I lost it. No matter what I did I couldn't get the bike back. I think I remember a fire but I could have been dreaming." He closed his eyes hoping for more memories but there were none. He shook his head.
Sara felt a tear rolling down her cheek. He reached up and brushed it away with his bandage.
"What?" he asked growing concerned.
"Somehow she got the bike off you and…"
"How?" he asked instantly getting upset.
"We don't know. She got the bike off and apparently burned her hands doing it. She strained her back pretty good. She found your knife I gave you for Christmas and she cut up her sweater and shirt for bandages. She built a fire and went for help. Rey and Kane found her on the side of the road 5 miles from you. Her knees are torn up from falling on them and her hands were a mess because she kept landing on them with the burns. She put her coat on you and went for help. She had bad hypothermia and they had to sedate her when they got her here. Physically she should be fine." He saw there was more. Sara was her best friend and could see the pain on her face.
"What else?" he was afraid to ask.
"She is blaming herself for it. She won't listen. She wouldn't even look at me. She thinks she made you worse by moving you."
"It wasn't her fault. I didn't see the ice. She put her coat on me? How could I let her do that?" he asked with a tear in his eye. He started to tremble and put his elbows down to try and lift himself up. Sara reached and lightly pushed him back down.
"Calm down. You are starting to sound like her. I doubt you had a choice in the matter." Sara tried to smile.
"Where is Adam?" he asked still trying to get up.
"He is on his way," she added quickly. "You need to calm down. She is fine right now."
"Right now" he said quickly.
The doctor walked in.
"How are you Mr. Calaway?" he asked noting the tension in the room right then.
"Pretty sore" he admitted.
"I would imagine." He said pulling the sheet back and exposing his feet. "I just want to test something out. Close your eyes and let me know if you feel this."
Mark closed his eyes. The doctor pulled out a pin and pushed it on his leg. He looked at Marks face for a response. There was none. He pushed it slightly on the other foot where the cast didn't cover and tried there.
"Did you feel that?" he asked.
"No." Mark said with his eyes still closed. The doctor tried further up his better leg. Mark had a slight frown cross his features.
"Did you feel that?" he asked.
"I'm not sure. I didn't feel any pain," he said opening his eyes.
"We will check again later. It may take a while. I will order something for the pain and I will be back later." He turned to walk away.
"Nothing for pain doc. I am ok right now. I will call when I need it." Mark looked at him menacingly.
"Is your friend as stubborn?" he asked Sara with a smile.
"Worse!" she said right away.
The doctor left and they were alone. There wasn't much to say. He kept trying to remember anything he could but what there was seemed more like a dream than anything else. Slowly small pieces came back but nothing that filled in the picture.
"I can't believe she is blaming herself for this" he said sadly.
"Since Matt she blames herself for everything. Adam is usually the only one who can help when she gets like that. We just have to hold her together until he shows up," she said hoping it would help.
"I want to see her," he said seriously.
"You cant right now. Maybe later they will let her come in. I will ask the doctor when he comes back." Sara noticed his eyes were closing again. His face looked very tired.
"Go to sleep and I will check on her. I will be back" he nodded and the tension left his face; he was asleep before she left the room.
Again, Sara made the long trip down the hall. She walked in and saw Angel staring toward the window. Sara sat down. She reached into her purse and pulled out her necklace that they had taken off when she got there. Angel looked at her in a sad way.
She put her hand out to offer it but she didn't take it.
"I don't deserve it Sara," she said shaking her head.
"This is stupid. You are being selfish. Not everything is about you. Not everything happens because of you. I never told Mark about our conversations. Your parents blamed you for everything but they were wrong. They made their own choices and decisions. So did your brothers. You have to let it go sometime. Not everything is your fault. Things happen, sometimes God tests us." Sara reached over and hung it on her neck closing the clasp. Angel reached for it as she did in nervousness but only got frustrated because her hands were so bandaged she couldn't feel it.
"He tested me and I
failed again," she said with tears rolling down her face.
"Would
you stop it? You are acting like a kid again. You had to move him.
You helped him and got him help. What more could you have done?"
she said getting almost angry.
"He took me on that ride to get my mind off Adam. He didn't need another bike. I probably leaned the wrong way when it tipped" she brushed the tears from her face.
"He said he couldn't control the bike. It slipped on the ice. He couldn't stop it. There was nothing you could have done. And despite how you are trying to turn this on you he told me last month he was looking for another bike" Sara was trying not to get angry but was barely holding on to it.
"I want to see him," Angel said in a moment of calm. Sara thought it would be the best thing.
"I will ask the doctor when he comes back" she smiled and touched her arm. Angel started to jump away but Sara held on. Angel sat up despite the searing pain in her back. Sara grabbed her for a hug and could feel her shaking. All she could do was keep saying 'its ok'. She couldn't imagine how she felt in the middle of nowhere and helpless.
The nurse came in again with another needle. She gave a brief unconvincing smile and put the needle again into the IV port.
"I told you I don't want anything for pain." She said very annoyed.
"The doctor wants you to have it and since he had to forcefully take over your care in the emergency room I have to follow his orders until he releases you to make your own decisions. Then it will be up to you or your proxy." She pulled the needle out and walked away.
Sara watched her. Her upset features softened and her eyes glazed again. After a minute she was falling asleep.
"Sara" she said slurring badly.
"What honey?" Sara said stroking her hair like she did whenever she felt her motherly instinct take over.
"Adam" she looked confused.
"He is on his way. Japan is a long plane ride. He will be here." She said smiling. Looking at Angel she saw this wasn't a minimum of a painkiller. Something was wrong. Suddenly she recognized the difference and got angry.
"I will be back when you wake up." She added, kissing her forehead and noticed Angel was already asleep.
Sara walked out the
door and went to the nurse's station. She spotted the nurse who
gave her the shot.
"What was that you gave her?" she said very
demanding.
"I can't discuss her case with you. Those are the rules." She said smugly.
"I am one of her
proxies. I want to know what you have been giving her," Sara
yelled. The nurse called for the doctor. After a few minutes he
walked up to the desk with a worried look on his face.
"What is
it?" he looked to the nurse to offer some explanation.
"She wants me to
discuss the medication I have been giving your patient and I am not
aware of her alleged proxy," she said with the coldness of a woman
toughened to seeing patients as a bed number and not a person.
"She
is a proxy and has full access to her records" he said grabbing her
chart. He opened it up and started reading.
"What the hell is this?" he yelled to the nurse.
"I gave what you
prescribed doctor," she said innocently.
"I wrote on her chart
that nothing narcotic was to be given!" he started yelling.
The nurse had a look of confusion on her face. She reached for the chart and he took it. She reread what was on it.
"Doctor, it says right here, patient is to get the shot every 4 hours for pain" she handed him the chart back. He grabbed it and looked again. Flipping the page he looked at her in disgust.
"Did you bother to
turn the page? This patient has a history of drug problems. I
originally wrote for this but added a revision on the back when I
found out more of her history." His face turned a dark red.
The
nurse took the chart back and her demeanor changed immediately.
Not being able to stand
not being included any longer Sara finally stepped in.
"What in
the hell have you been giving her?" she said loudly.
"Morphine" he said simply. I want to talk to you right now!" he said to the nurse who by this time had changed to a shade of white. Sara stood there shaking in anger. She could hear yelling behind a closed door. The nurse walked out with a tear stained face and all her uniform had no ID tags. She looked at Sara before walking away.
"I'm very sorry" she offered and walked away.
The doctor walked out
and tried to think of something to say.
"She has been suspended
until we investigate. She has only had 4 shots so the damage should
be minimal. There wouldn't be a physical dependency yet." He
added hopefully.
"I am not worried about the physical dependency, she more mentally dependent than physically the first time. She is still upset that this is her fault." Sara shook her head to herself not believing this could happen.
"We will help her." He said seriously.
"She doesn't accept help often. She is very stubborn. I have only heard her ask for help once" Sara took a moment to calm down. "She wants to see Mark. If she could see him it might help"
The doctor looked at
her for a long moment.
"It might make matters worse. His
appearance right now might shock her more. I would wait for more
improvement so she sees that he is better."
"She saw him bloody and half alive on the ground and took care of him. She saw him torn open. How could seeing him in bandages be worse than that?" she spat at him venting her anger wherever she could.
The doctor thought a
moment and nodded his head.
"When she wakes up call me and we
will take her. But I don't recommend this." He added.
"Her husband isn't here yet. She had no other real family. She has been through more than you could ever believe from childhood on. I think it would help," she added. The doctor nodded.
"I don't think we should tell Mark about this yet. I told him about her and he got upset. You don't want to see him mad doctor. Trust me." She said seriously.
"Between the two of them it will be a while. He finally asked for a pain shot while you were down here. He is asleep again. I doubt highly he will go through the next few days without the shots. Even for someone with a high threshold for pain. He will probably be in and out most of the time," he added shaking his head slightly.
"I think as long as she sees him alive it will help" she added. He finally nodded slightly and left. Sara took a deep breath and walked back into Angel's room. The stress of the last day was beginning to take its toll on her. Inside she kept praying for Adam to show up to help. If there were one thing that would really help it would be his influence. She just had to hold her together that long.
