Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciated them. I will try to update as often as possible. This chapter is shorter because i just had to incorperate the meadow and i wanted this chapter to be JUST about the meadow. Anyway, enjoy!
I was lost. So, as soon as Carlisle moved Bella's body, I escaped. I went back to the one place I had come to enjoy the most. The place I had met Bella. Forks. I stayed in the forest. I did not go home; I didn't want to face the pleas from esme and the smugness from Rosalie. I still felt angry at Alice and Jasper. They were the ones that let her escape. I also felt envy towards them as well. They were the last people to see Bella alive.
I went first to the meadow. I snapped all the trees around the perfect circular meadow, making it uneven. I spread the dead trunks around the grass. I tore out flowers out by their roots and I lay them with the trunks. I pulled out large chunks of grass and lay them on top of the large pile of wood and wildflowers. I pulled a lighter out of my pocket. I was the one I was going to burn James's broken body with. I set the pile on fire and watched it burn.
The massive flames spreading and reaching the surrounding trees I had not wrecked. I stayed there silent and thought of nothing. I moaned and I screamed. And more than anything, I wished tears would escape my eyelids. It was so hard to be a living stone; I was touched by a human and made to feel human emotions. But had no way of expressing them. Now that Bella had gone, I felt like those human feelings had gone also. I couldn't feel grief or sadness. Everything just felt like an unbearable pain that I had no way of escaping.
Eventually rain started to fall; the fire was starting to go out. I reached out and put my hand into a crevice in the wood. I touch a flame and I felt a small shot of pain, but there was warmth as well. I pulled my hand out from the wood and I promised myself that that small shot of heat would be the last warmth I would fell until I would die.
The fire finally went out completely. The grass was patchy and uneven. Muddy from the rain where I had torn the grass away. There were half broken flowers and scattered petals among the ruined grass. The sky was grey and there were no colours. The once colourful wildflowers were now either stained by mud or burnt. The heap of wood in the centre of the now misshapen meadow was black and ugly. I looked at the lighter.
I was shiny and silver and showed my reflection. My face was paler than ever and my eyes were so dark that they looked like holes. I refused to hunt though. I didn't want to see blood again after seeing Bella's blood stain the ballet studio. With a roar I took the lighter and cast it in the ashes. I took handfuls of the ashes and spread them though the grass. Watching the rain wash the ash from my hands leaving only a small trace of black ash. The rain was washing the ash into various puddles and creating black pools of ash and mud.
I silently turned my back on the meadow. I had now ruined the place were Bella and I had first revealed our feelings. Where she had first touched my with feeling and were I had defeated the monster inside of me. Now that I had killed the meadow and the memories it held, Although I though it would ease the pain, I just doubled it. The monster came back to my mind.
"Are you happy now Edward?" he asked me "Now that you have broken the place that held your strongest memories?" I couldn't defeat the monster this time. Instead I ran of into the forest. Promising myself to never return there again.
For anyone who cares, im very sorry for destroying the meadow! And if this doesnt make sense, dont worry. it made sense to me but i'm not sure if anyone else will understand it.
anywaay, I will update soon and i apreciate all the reviews and the people who added this story on story alert or their favourites!
Estee.
