A/N: Yeah this is short. Most of my first chapters are short, I've noticed. First chapters are to see if people are interested in the idea. Anyway, please read and review the story.


It all started quite innocently one day. We were passing notes in Transfiguration, eagerly anticipating the Hogsmeade trip scheduled that weekend. But those innocent intentions went a little off track, you could say. Maybe, maybe not. Depending on how you look at it.


From the Desk of Lavender Brown

How come your parents get you stationary for your birthday? -P

I have no idea. Oh well. -L

I'm bored.

Me too.

Uggh. Did you see Parkinson at breakfast?

With that disgusting barette and skanky heels?

Yup. It was horrible. She has no fashion sense.

I know. It's tragic. Plus, she is so desperate. I mean, Malfoy won't give her the time of day, yet she keeps throwing herself at him!

Mmhhmm. I know! It's pathetic.

Yeah. If we made a list of the top 5 hopeless cases at Hogwarts, she'd be on the list.

You know we should try and make that list. I'll start.


And so it started. This one little list was created. But this one little list? Caused things to get. . . interesting, you could say.


Top 5 Hopeless Cases at Hogwarts

Presented by Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil

(Name, "Issue")

1. Pansy Parkinson, Bitch

2. Ginny Weasley, Tomboy

3. Hermione Granger, Bookworm

4. Susan Bones, Mouse

5. Cho Chang, Wimp


Plan of Action: Help the hopeless.

Uggh. This may take a while.