A/N: Here's chapter eight. Nine is on its way (the last chapter, yay!). So about this one…First off, you must forgive me for the repeated use of trust, spite and high school in this chapter…don't ask me why, but I wrote it with those words used a lot, and I don't feel like changing it at all. :D And you'll notice I've stolen a plot-line from the end of Season 2, even though I disregard cannon from after like 1x13, I really liked the whole "living-together" thing that occurred when Blair and Nate got back together in Season 2. It's obviously not used in the exact same context, but I wanted to point out I did borrow the idea from the actual show. Oh, and this chapter alone is over 5,000 words. Well, enjoy! R&R! Thanks! –Mac

Disclaimer: I don't own Gossip Girl.

Chapter Eight

Matters of Trust and Spite

Blair was still wheeling from the day she had spent with Nate since the tabloid. It had been more than twenty-four hours since it had arrived at her door. Nate was to be meeting with Chuck at that precise moment. Blair was in her studio trying to work on some sketches, but currently she was surrounded by numerous crumpled papers and couldn't get her mind off the two men who had dominated much of her life—both in high school and the present. Her focus was on her phone, placed strategically to be in her sight at all times. She was waiting for one of three people to call—she had no doubt that all three would call, but she couldn't be sure who would be first. Either Nate to tell her what his decision was and possibly invite her to celebrate with him, or Chuck to tell her what Nate's decision was and possibly find some reason for them to see each other again, or Serena simply because she had nothing better to do than involve herself in Blair's life and comment on the love triangle, which Blair considered nonexistent. Blair resented Serena's unnecessary concerns, although she knew turn about was fair play as she had interfered in Serena's relationships, plural, many times over the years. Blair couldn't say whose call she would prefer to come in first, though she knew, in context, it should be Nate.

Blair had occupied herself with erasing the head off her latest sketch. She had given up on creating any new designs as every one of her sketches from the day had turned out looking like trash bags of varying color. She had finished with the head and moved onto amputating the arms with her large eraser, when her phone began to vibrate. While she could see her phone begin to move, she couldn't quite read the contact name at that angle. She took a deep breath and reached for the phone. When she saw who it was, she knew she should have been surprised but she was, oddly enough, not caught off guard in the slightest.

"Chuck Bass, to what do I owe this pleasure?" Blair answered.

"Nathaniel took my offer," Chuck responded immediately, "He's currently filling out paperwork, which is why he hasn't called you. So try to act surprised when he tells you."

"I assume you made him a great offer. He was on the fence about working with you…" Blair began.

"His concern was over working under me. Nathaniel is a competitive person, and lately that competition has been focused on me specifically. He came into the meeting determined to not leave feeling subordinate to me," Chuck corrected. "He would not have said yes if I had not made him a generous offer he couldn't refuse on principle."

"Nate has been—" Blair started again.

"Nate has been having issues about you and me. I saw the article," Chuck finished for her. "It gave me a frightening sense of nostalgia."

"I would say Nate and I felt the same way. When Gossip Girl went offline, I thought we were done with people knowing the interworkings of our lives," Blair sighed.

"We're the royalty of the Upper East Side, we'll never be done with that, Blair," Chuck laughed lightly. "How did Nathaniel react? He wouldn't mention anything about you during the meeting."

Blair was hesitant in discussing this with Chuck but the compulsion to tell him overpowered the resistance, "He wasn't happy that's for sure. He admitted to not truly wanting us to spend time together. He also said he doesn't trust you with me."

"Honest," Chuck responded, "I must say I wasn't expecting that."

"His reaction or me telling you?" Blair questioned, frowning slightly.

"The latter," Chuck answered, "You usually keep matters of your love life private."

"Well, I want my relationship with Nate to work and I want my friendship with you to work as well," Blair replied, "I believe you knowing that is important to achieving that goal. Now that you know he's uncomfortable, you'll do whatever it takes to not do anything to prove him right."

"Nathaniel never did anything to hurt me. I was the one that made the devastating death blow to our friendship. I have no reasoning to place behind wanting to inflict anymore harm on him."

"You weren't the only one who hurt him Chuck…I played a part…" Blair responded.

"No Blair. That's the difference. Nate will always see me as the villain. And when you're playing his damsel in distress, he could never blame you for anything," Chuck said, and then Blair could hear another voice in the background. Suddenly, Chuck's voice piped up, "Nathaniel is coming back in. I'll call you later B."

"Bye, Chuck," Blair whispered as the line went dead.

She actually felt disappointed. She felt the conversation had been going somewhere important. Where, she couldn't have explained but it felt like it was an important destination for her and Chuck to reach. She was almost upset with Nate for interrupting.

Blair didn't have much time to think about that because he phone began to ring again. She quickly answered, "Hello?"

"Hey B. How's it going?"

"Serena," Blair rolled her eyes. "Just ask what you called to ask. I know you didn't call to see how my day was going."

"Did he take the offer?" Serena asked without further ado.

"Yes, he did," Blair smiled, "I'm happy for him. He hated that he hadn't found the right job yet. This is going to be good for him. It's going to be good for both of them."

"So you've talked to Nate? Is he excited?" Serena's voice grew more enthusiastic.

"No, not yet," Blair answered. "Chuck called me."

"Blair, what are you doing?" Serena sighed.

"I'm not doing anything," Blair responded, "Chuck called while Nate was doing paperwork. Nate will call me as soon as he's done with Chuck. Besides, I don't see how I have control over which one of them calls me first."

"I mean the growing attachment to Chuck," Serena replied.

"There is no 'growing attachment.' We're friends again, that's all," Blair defended.

"It's just every time you move on, he seems to be right there…holding you back," Serena commented.

"That's absurd!" Blair exclaimed. "Honestly, Serena. Don't you have your own love issues?"

"Yes, they're called the male population of the state of New York," Serena deadpanned, "I'm just concerned for you Blair. You and Nate have a good thing going, you shouldn't chance losing it."

"You think I'm going to lose Nate?" Blair questioned angrily.

"He wants to move forward with you, but you're pulling away. If you don't get on the same page soon, I don't see how you could continue," Serena answered.

Blair's mouth fell open in shock, "On the same page? Are you saying that he's going to leave me if I don't sleep with him?"

"Of course not," Serena exclaimed. "I'm just saying that when the opportunity to move forward with him arises…you should take it."

"Thanks for the advice Serena, but I can handle myself," Blair replied. "I'll talk to you later. I'm expecting another call."

Serena hung up and Blair returned her phone to its previous place on her desk to wait for Nate to call. She kept no pretense of working on her sketches. Instead she sat nearly immobile, staring down at her phone. When it didn't ring after fifteen minutes, she pulled out a clean sheet of paper and began to angrily scratch lines into it. She had been certain he would have called by then. For all he knew, she was waiting patiently for his call to find out what his decision had been. She couldn't figure out why he wouldn't have called yet.

When her phone finally rang, she had gone over every possible scenario for his reasoning behind not calling her quickly enough. She had to fight to keep her voice light as she answered, "Hey Nate. How did it go?"

"Very well, actually," Nate said. Blair could hear the smile in his voice and it soothed away all her anger. "I took the job, Blair. It was the perfect fit. I'm amazed by Chuck's generosity. The salary we agreed upon was far more than I really deserve, but I'm not going to complain."

"That's great, Nate. I'm so happy for you," Blair responded.

"Thank you," Nate replied, "I've felt so off these past few weeks. Unemployment doesn't suit me."

"And now you're a big shot at Bass Industries…was it worth the wait?" Blair asked.

"I wouldn't say I'm a big shot, but it was worth the wait. I don't know what it's going to be like working so closely with Chuck…" Nate answered, "But let's not get into that. We should go out and celebrate. Let's get dinner, anywhere you want. My treat."

"That sounds lovely, Nate," Blair said. "I would love to."

"I'll pick you up at eight then?"

"Yes, eight is good."

"Okay, I'll see you tonight Blair."

"Bye Nate."

Blair hung up the phone and dropped it on her desk. She let her head fall into her hands as she let out a long sigh. It had been so easy the first weeks. She couldn't understand why it had become so hard.

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One Month Later

It had been one month. One month of dinners and movies with Nate. One month of drinks and gossip with Chuck. One month of Serena's unnecessary poking and prodding. One month of pulling away, pushing Nate away when things got too far, and repeating over and over "I'm not ready, not yet, late." One month of Nate immersing himself in work. One month of growing closer to Chuck, the friendship stronger than ever before. One month of Nate's eyes narrowing every time Chuck was brought up or was around. One month of Nate's scrutinizing gaze following her everywhere she went. One month, and his trust was already wavering.

After just over a month of working at Bass Industries, Nate had helped close a critical deal for the company. In celebration, Chuck put together an impromptu party. Nate had offered to pick up Blair on his way to the party, but she had opted to meet him there once she was done at her studio. When she had arrived at the penthouse suite that had once been home to Mr. and Mrs. Bart Bass—now occupied by only the younger Bass as Serena and Eric had found their own apartments and Bart and Lily were on permanent vacation—the party was already in full swing. She had been hoping to find Nate to congratulate him, but he was nowhere in sight. Blair spotted Serena across the room with her brother, both Humphreys, and Vanessa. Blair frowned—she would have joined Serena, but she wasn't up for the mini-Brooklynite reunion. She weaved through the crowd, hoping to catch a glimpse of Nate, but instead of her boyfriend, she found Chuck.

Chuck had been leaning against one wall with a scotch in hand. When he saw her approaching, he stepped forward to meet her, "Hello Blair, did you just get here?"

"Just walked in," Blair answered as Chuck leaned forward to kiss her cheek in greeting. "Have you seen Nate?"

"He's around. I've seen Serena and Eric with our old Brooklyn based classmates. When I said people could bring whoever they want, I didn't realize they would be bringing in the—"

Blair cut him off, "Did Serena and Eric bring them?"

"Surprisingly, no," Chuck answered. "Can't imagine who did…"

"Well with Dan's book on the best-sellers list, Jenny's clothing line gaining publicity, and Vanessa's budding directing career—they may have made friends in high places…" Blair replied. Then as she glanced around the room again, murmured, "Where could Nate have disappeared to?"

"Perhaps he's preparing himself," Chuck said passively.

Blair frowned, "Preparing himself for what?"

"I shouldn't say," Chuck responded. "I believe it's supposed to be a surprise."

Blair's frown morphed into a scowl. She moved closer to Chuck threateningly, gripped his bowtie tightly in her fist, and demanded, "Preparing himself for what, Chuck?"

"To ask you to…" Chuck paused for dramatic effect, "…move in with him."

"Oh," Blair stepped back, releasing Chuck's tie which he immediately began to straighten. She let out the breath she had been holding, flooded momentarily with relief until she realized the severity of the actual question was nearly as high as the one she had feared, "How did you…? When did he…? Why does he…? What?"

"Awhile ago, he told me he was looking to move out of his parents old pace…neither of them live in it anymore, but he said he still felt like it wasn't really his. I didn't quite understand, as I had no problem claiming this place as mine. But apparently, Nathaniel and I are of two entirely different species…" Chuck trailed off topic, but quickly returned to his original point, "He asked me to recommend a real estate agent. And when I did, he asked that I join him to view a few apartments. To see that he wasn't getting ripped off, I would imagine. I was surprised at his request, as even working together has been tense this past month…but I went."

"What happened?" Blair prompted him to continue.

"He found an apartment he liked and once the agent left to collect the paperwork, he turned to me and asked if I thought you would like it," Chuck answered. "I said he would have to ask you. He said he would, when he showed it to you and asked you to live in it with him."

"I…" Blair stuttered, "Is that all he said?"

"You don't need to hear the rest," Chuck downed the rest of his drink. Then he walked over to refill his glass. "It's between me and him."

Blair followed Chuck and grasped his arm, forcing him to turn back to her, "What else did he say?"

"Blair, you don't want to know," Chuck shook his head, "I have no intention of sullying the image of your white knight."

"I want to know," Blair said forcefully. "Tell me."

"He told me to back off because I was 'sadly mistaken' if I believed I could steal you from him again," Chuck responded reluctantly, "He said he would be damned if he let it happen again. He's going to do whatever it takes to keep you."

"He bought the apartment so he could keep an eye on me, didn't he?" Blair shook her head.

"I don't know," Chuck shrugged.

"Don't lie," Blair warned, "You know why he's doing this. We're nowhere close to the place in our relationship where this is appropriate."

"I don't know if this has anything to do with trust issues with you, but the show he's putting on is for my benefit," Chuck replied. "He doesn't like that I spend so much time with you. He doesn't like that we're close. He's trying to spite me to show me that you're his and that I can't have you."

"I…" Blair sighed, "What do I say?"

"I can't tell you what to say," Chuck replied, "It's your decision. One you might want to make quickly, because Nathaniel is coming this way."

Blair spun around to see Nate emerging from the crowd toward her. She glanced back at Chuck and he raised his glass to her. He stepped back to watch what happened next. Once Nate was in front of Blair, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. She was surprised by his sudden display of affection and she had to resist the urge to pull away too quickly. When he broke away, she swallowed hard and did her best to meet his eyes.

"Congratulations, Nate," Blair said smiling slightly. "Chuck was just telling me all about how this merger took a lot of time to complete, because finding the appropriate time to bring the two companies together was a delicate matter."

"Thanks, Blair," Nate responded not picking up on her double meaning, "Hey, can I talk to you a minute?"

"Sure," Blair nodded though her head was screaming 'No!'

Nate pulled her aside slightly and reached into his jacket pocket. He then held out his had to her, a single key dangling from his fingers. Blair stared down at it as a lump formed in her throat. She swallowed it down and took a deep breath. Then she forced herself to look up and meet Nate's gaze.

"What is this?" Blair asked, even though she knew exactly what it was.

"A key, to my new apartment," Nate answered, "I just signed all the papers. I'm moving out of my parents' old place into a new one that's all mine."

"You want me to have a key? That's sweet," Blair tried to stall his official question because it would change everything they had achieved in their relationship. She was mentally pleading with him to not do it.

Blair watched as his gaze moved up to watch over her shoulder, the precise spot she knew Chuck was still standing in. He kept his eyes on Chuck as he corrected her, "No, I want you to move in with me. I want to live together."

A million thoughts flowed through her mind, but one was louder than the rest: Chuck was right.

Moving in together would be a progressing step in their relationship, but if Nate was only doing it to show up Chuck, like winning her affections was some sort of competition, then this wasn't the way to do it. She didn't know how she could say yes when it was likely that the request was only out of not trusting her and trying to spite Chuck. Nate seemed to be waiting for an answer, but Blair was nowhere near prepared to give one. She opened her mouth to speak but found herself closing it again.

"Blair?" Nate prompted.

"Nate, I don't…" Blair stammered.

"I caught you off guard, didn't I?" Nate replied. "Look you don't have to give me an answer now. Tonight after this party ends, come with me to see it. Then you can make an informed decision."

"Ok-kay," Blair agreed reluctantly.

"Great. I'm going to grab a drink. I'll catch up with you in a minute," Nate moved past her toward where Chuck was standing by the bar.

Blair didn't stay to watch the inevitable exchange between the two. Instead, she pushed through the crowd to Serena. Serena was still mingling with her brother and the Humphreys plus one. Blair came up behind her and tapped her on the shoulder to draw her attention. Serena turned around, opening the circle to include Blair. All five pairs of eyes turned upon her. Blair pursed her lips under their curious gazes.

"Serena, can I speak to you privately?" Blair requested.

"What, you can't talk to her in front of old friends?" Dan commented, smirking slightly as he laughed at his own joke. Jenny and Eric laughed lightly, Vanessa glanced away as she took a sip off her drink, and Serena frowned.

"Sorry, Cabbage Patch, this is strictly a grown up matter so you little kiddies can just run along," Blair shooed them away with her hands, but they didn't leave.

"Cabbage Patch? You're still using that one?" Dan responded with an eyebrow raised

"Do you still have Cedric?" Blair countered.

Dan cleared his throat, ignoring the question. He continued, "Don't you think it's a bit old?"

Blair pretended to think it over, "It still amuses me, so no."

"Blair, leave Dan alone," Serena replied, "What's wrong?"

"Can we please?" Blair gestured away from Dan and the rest.

"Of course," Serena agreed, beginning to move away with Blair, "I'll be right back guys." Serena joined Blair in a more private corner of the room, "Now tell me, what's going on?"

"Nate asked me to move in with him," Blair blurted out.

"Blair, that's great." A grin appeared on Serena's face, but, as Blair simply shook her head, it disappeared. "You said yes, right?"

"I haven't said anything yet," Blair answered. "I couldn't give him an answer."

"Why not?" Serena frowned.

"Because I know why he's doing it and it would be wrong to say yes under his false pretenses," Blair responded. "He only asked me to move in so he can keep an eye on me and simultaneously rub it in Chuck's face that I've chosen Nate over him."

"You have chose Nate though, right?"

Blair's eyes moved up to meet Serena's questioning gaze, "I didn't realize I had to make a choice. But that's beside the point. Did you not hear what I said? Nate doesn't trust me and he's deliberately trying to provoke Chuck."

"Blair can you blame him? You're spending an awful lot of time with Chuck and you've avoided taking any forward action in your relationship with Nate," Serena replied with a shrug, "I can see where he's coming from."

"I don't believe this," Blair shook her head, "You can't be serious. Do you understand where I'm coming from? I've grown up so much since high school. All the deception and vengeful behavior has been eradicated from my life. I'm an adult. I don't have to sink to such levels to get what I want and keep it. And do you want to know why I have been spending so much time with Chuck? I enjoy his company because every day I can see new ways he's grown up as a person. He's the same Chuck Bass, but he's so much more mature than he was in high school. He's grown in ways that have made it possible for him to forge a friendship with me without wanting more…And as much as I hate to admit it, as much as I wanted to ignore it, Nate is the same person he was in high school. This just proves it. And maybe I don't want high-school-Nate. I want the grown up Nate I thought he was going to be…"

"Blair," Serena began.

"No you don't understand this teeter-totter I've been on between them this last month. One has no problem with me having a relationship with both of them. One wants to completely have me, even if it means I have to sacrifice a friendship with someone who is incredibly important to me. The trouble is, Nate is the one with the wrong attitude…and I expected better of him," Blair explained. "I had hoped to get a little support from you. I am facing one of the hardest decisions of my life right now. I'm afraid if I tell Nate no, it will be the end of us. I'm ready for that to be the case, but I can't say yes…Never mind, Serena. I have an apartment to go see."

Blair walked away from Serena, in search of Nate. At the very least, she could see the place and buy a little time to come to the bet conclusion. Instead of finding him, she again ran into Chuck. Her eyes met his for a split second before she looked away and headed in the direction opposite of him. Before she got too far, Chuck caught her arm and forced her to turn back to him.

"Blair, wait a minute, please," Chuck said quietly.

"I need to find Nate," Blair brought her hands up to frame her face, gently applying pressure to her temples. "I have to go see the apartment. He's expecting an answer."

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about," Chuck responded.

"If you want to try to stop me from do this you can save your breath. I'm already going to—" Blair began, but Chuck interrupted.

"I want you to say yes," Chuck replied abruptly.

"Say…yes?" Blair choked out.

"If you want to be with Nathaniel, you're going to have to say yes. You have the chance to have everything you wanted when we were in high school. I will not let you pass that up because of me. If you're happy with him, then you need to say yes. Whatever issues you have between you can be resolved. Don't be affected by the problems, between him and me, that are never going away," Chuck explained. "I want you to be happy and if trying to be my friend is going to make you miserable…I would rather let Nathaniel have his way and spend less time with you."

"Chuck, no…" Blair murmured. "I won't cut you out of my life because…"

Chuck reached over and gripped her by her shoulders, making her look him straight in the eyes, "You do whatever you have to do to be happy."

"Blair, there you are."

Blair turned as Chuck's hands fell away. Nate came to stand in front of her. She brought a smile to her lips as Nate looked down at her. She glanced behind her to judge Chuck's reaction to the interruption, but he was already gone. The smile fell and her brow furrowed as she turned back to Nate.

"You ready to go?" Nate asked.

"You're the guest of honor. Shouldn't you wait for the party to be over?" Blair attempted to stall the inevitable.

"No one will even notice if I'm gone. Besides Chuck's hosting, this could go on until tomorrow…" Nate chuckled lightly, "Come on."

"Okay," Blair agreed, and looked around the room one last time before following Nate out. The last thing she saw before she turned toward the elevator was Chuck's eyes watching her intently from across the room.

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A short cab ride later, Blair was following Nate into an empty apartment. He gestured around the large room for her to look around. She tried to give Nate an honest effort and really look at the apartment but her mind kept straying back to Chuck's last words. "You do whatever you have to do to be happy." She had to ask herself if doing this would make her happy. She had been happy when she and Nate first got back together, but the past month she had lost sight of the good and was overwhelmed by the bad. The conclusion she was coming to was unwanted but unavoidable.

"What do you think?" Nate questioned as he walked back over to her.

"I-I don't know what to say," Blair answered.

Nate raised his hands to gently cup her face, "Say yes. Say you'll move in with me. Say you want to be with me and live in this apartment with me."

Blair met his eyes. She should have seen some sort of love and hope in his eyes, but instead all she saw was a smug determination. She stepped out of his reach and his hands fell back to his side.

"No."

Nate frowned, "What do you mean, no?"

"I mean no, Nate," Blair could feel the sting of tears at the backs of her eyes. "I won't live with you. I can't."

"Why not?"

"You want me to live with you for the wrong reasons," Blair responded.

"I don't understand," Nate shook his head.

"If you were having such a huge problem with me spending time with Chuck, you should have said something instead of pretending to be okay with it and planning something like this to deliberately spite him," Blair began, "And you…you should trust me…You shouldn't need to keep me under surveillance to make sure that nothing happens with Chuck. You should have the trust in me to know that I couldn't hurt you in that way…even though you had to know this would hurt me. And you've gone out of your way to hurt Chuck, when all he's been is good to you despite the problems the two of you have."

"Good to me? He's doing the same thing he did back then…you're just too blind to see it," Nate exclaimed, "You spend more time alone with him than me. What am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to think? I mean, I have no idea what you two do when you're alone together."

Blair pulled herself up straight, "I supposed you can just read about it in the gossip columns. You know I blamed Gossip Girl for ruining our relationship in high school for fueling all our suspicions and insecurities…but maybe that was just us….It was all us. All us and our fear, our inability to trust each other, our obsession with one-upping each other out of pure spite."

"Blair, what does this—"

"Let me finish, Nate," Blair cut him off with a wave of her hand. "In high school, you were better than me or Chuck. You were the good one compared to us, but we all had our issues. The problem we're having now is…I grew up. I learned to be better than I was in high school. So did Chuck…but you haven't. You're the exact same person you were back then. When we got back together, I thought I was getting my Prince Charming back."

Nate frowned, "Blair?"

Blair sighed, "But you're not Prince Charming anymore. And I'm looking for a real relationship, not a fairytale. Everything we had once, it's gone now. I think maybe we needed to go through this to realize that."

"Is this really happening?" Nate questioned.

"Yes, it is," Blair nodded. "I'm sorry, Nate. I truly wanted us to work…but I think it's over. It might have been over before we ran into each other that day…We just didn't know it yet. This will be what it was meant to be…closure."

"Closure," Nate's eyes turned toward the floor. "You're right…about why I asked you to live with me. I'm sorry. I just felt like I was losing you and I blamed it on Chuck. Maybe I was just becoming aware of the fact that I really never got you back. I wasn't ready to admit that though."

"It's okay," Blair shook her head. "It could have been handled differently, that's for sure, but I can understand why you did it. There was a time when I would have done the exact same thing."

"I didn't want to be like this," Nate said quietly.

"Neither of us did," Blair agreed. She built up the courage she needed and turned to leave. She stopped in the doorway, and without looking back replied, "Goodbye, Nate."