AN. I do not own Star Trek or any of the Characters. I just wish to thank my beta Wesley E. Matillies who not only checked my work but wrote the parts about Bones.
The battle raged around me as I fought to reach Spock. It wasn't hard as all I had to do was follow the trail of unconscious bodies. Crap. I looked down and saw the liquid I was dreading. Blood, green blood. The blood of a Vulcan. I sped up and jumping over the row of bodies in front of me, I could just make out the pointy ears of my First Officer. I breathed a sigh of relief but flung myself into battle as he was sparring against 9 people at once.
I had never seen so many people fighting at the one time and in the one place. The bodies littering the ground. Before my eyes Spock took a hit and fell to the ground. I rushed over and took up a defensive position above him, fighting the people that had hurt Spock.
Hours later, when I had exhausted my phaser power and there were no more live enemies in sight, the rest either dead or escaped, I looked down to see Spock motionless on the ground, clothes stained green with dried blood. Kneeling I tried to wake him, but he would never wake again. I lifted my head to the skies and wailed, raw emotion flooding me, my arms clutching the lifeless body of my friend.
"Spock is fine, Jim, don't worry. Just go back to sleep." Bones' voice gave me a much needed reprieve from my nightmare. Except that it gave my brain more to go on.
I paced up and down the narrow gap between bio-beds in sickbay. The blue and white sterile environment was making me itch and I longed to be back on my bridge. If it were any other day, Bones would be skulking around, grumpily demanding I "get the hell out of sickbay, leave the patients alone" and that I would "know if anything happened". I wished this were any other day.
Nurse Chappel pulled me out into the corridor, seeming braver than she obviously felt. 'I'm sorry Captain. There are just some things that no amount of medication or technology can fix.' And in that moment when her professional façade slipped, I knew it was hopeless. This was not what I wanted to hear.
I stormed away from her back into sickbay and flung away the pale dividing curtain. If they had me hooked up to one of these monitors, I seriously doubt my heart would register. If I ignored the computer printouts, data displays and my own heart, I could almost believe he was sleeping peacefully. I knew he wasn't.
'Captain?'
Spock.
I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry. I wanted to find some way, any way, to save my doctor. My friend.
'Captain, I believe it would be in the best interest to… end Doctor McCoy's suffering.'
Dammit! I knew he was right. I nodded involuntarily and as Nurse Chappel administered the fatal hypospray to Bones' neck I could not hide my own self loathing. I wanted to kick, scream and tear the whole bloody ship apart starting with wringing that damned Vulcan's neck!
Thick tears slid down my face as I cried out to the deck above. I had failed. I had failed by best friend and I hated myself for it. Maybe there is such as thing as a no-win scenario after all…
"Jim, wake up Jim. It is alright. Don't cry, please calm down. Jim!" Uhura's voice brought me from my vision but did not fully lift me into consciousness, her voice bringing another vision to me.
It had been ten days since they had last seen Uhura and in the days past the crew had gone to pieces, moving around the ship like ghosts, only doing the necessary tasks and talking very little. Spock had been hit the hardest, cracks forming in his usually perfect, impenetrable and emotionless façade.
We had been told to leave orbit and to return to our mission but we just couldn't. There was a voice in every one of our heads saying that she was still alive and if we left we would be killing her and none of us could deal with her blood on our hands.
The Ensign who had been covering Uhura's duty watch at the communication station on the bridge nervously spoke into his headset.
"Ensign West, what is it?" when I could see that he had something to report.
"Captain, um, Admiral Pike, um, wishes to um… speak to you. Um, he doesn't sound, um…"
"Doesn't sound what, Ensign? Quit the 'uming' and just get on with your report. I am not going to bite your head off." I glanced at Spock, expecting him to add his remarks but he was focused on his station, rigid and unmoving with grief. After taking a deep breath the Ensign replied.
"Yes Captain. Admiral Pike doesn't seem very impressed."
I sighed.
"Alright, put him up on the screen. The Ensign pushed a few buttons on his console and Pike's face appeared on the screen facing me.
"James Tiberius Kirk, how dare you disobey direct orders from your Starfleet superiors? You were ordered to return to your mission, yet you are still in the same place as you have resided in for the past 15 days. I realize that you have not yet located Lieutenant Uhura but need I remind you of the survival rates in unfamiliar and unfriendly planets. I am truly sorry for your loss but you have got to accept it. She is dead and there is nothing you can do about it.
At that point I zoned out and focused on the only thing that mattered from Pike's rant. "She's dead."
Ensign West interrupted my thoughts with his unsure voice.
"Captain, sir, I have a transmission from the locals. They wish to 'have conference' with you."
"Have conference?"
"That is exactly what they said, sir."
"Alright, put it up."
An image of a one eyed, blue man with a crown of spiked crystals appeared on the plasma.
"To whom would I be talking to?" I inquired coldly.
"My name is Zankerin and I am king of this planet which you call Votarben IV, and you are Captain James T. Kirk of the USS Enterprise, formerly from Iowa, United States of America, Earth, The Federation."
"How do you know who I am and why are you only contacting us now?"
"Forget the formalities and the pleasantries. I have knowledge that you require knowledge about your communications officer, Lieutenant Nyota Uhura."
"Where is she?"
"She is at the transport co-ordinates that I have given to Ensign West. You may collect her body."
"Her body? What have you done to her?" I roared.
"She is dead."
I cut the transmission and sprinted down to the transporter room; Spock was already there and was holding out my away mission belt with a phaser attached in its holster. We stepped onto the plates and as one hollow voice, said, "Energize."
Spock was the first to recover and ran over to Uhura's mangled, bloody and lifeless body. I followed and dropped to the ground, tears flooding down my cold cheeks.
Spock's face showed his struggle for control the he broke, screaming and crying to the stars. His one true love's blood soaking his clothes.
A strong set of arms held me down as I thrashed, screaming my heart out. The person spoke to me continuously but I could not understand what he was saying only that the person who held me was Bones.
'Aw hell, Jim! I hate transporters! You know what they do, don't you? They pull you apart atom by atom, molecule by molecule. If just one goes astray, poof, you're bourbon drinkin' days are over! For good!'
'Bones,' I argued, 'they asked for a doctor, you're a doctor and the only way to get there is by transporter so either you go willingly or I get Spock to knock you out and carry you.'
For his part, Spock just raised his eyebrow and stayed tactfully silent.
'Green-blooded hobgoblin. He would, wouldn't he? Fine, I'll walk, thank you.'
The three of us entered Transporter Room One where Scotty was on duty. 'Aye Cap'in. Everythin' ready to go.'
Bones grumbled and moaned and shifted uneasily on the pad. Again, Spock just raised his eyebrow. I nodded to Scotty, 'Energize, Mr. Scott.'
'Aye Cap'in. Energizing.'
The dematerialization felt normal enough until the Catarn ship began to waver into focus then something began to feel very wrong. I was forcibly thrown out of the beam and landed with a metallic thud on the tri-tanium deck of the cargo ship. 'Spock! Bones!' my yell was met only by a slow, monotone string of Vulcan curses. Spock was alright but where was Bones? I flipped open my communicator, struggling to keep my voice in check. 'Kirk to Enterprise. Mr. Scott, what happened? Where's doctor McCoy?'
Scotty sounded agitated, upset. What had happened? 'I canne understand it Cap'in! One minute everythin' was fine, the next all the panels surged! I can't retrieve Doctor McCoy's pattern. I'm sorry Cap'in I'm afraid we've lost him.'
Spock hovered just behind my right shoulder, as close to comforting as a Vulcan can. 'There was nothing you could have done, Jim. It would be illogical to conclude you served as a contributing factor in this matter.'
I sighed and wiped my face with my free hand. 'It is my fault, Spock. He wouldn't have come if I hadn't have pestered him into coming. If it wasn't for me, he'd still be alive.'
I walked away, intent on finding a nice secluded corner I could tuck myself away in and cry. Bones hated transporters and transporter malfunctions were so rare they were practically non-existent. One brief power surge had wiped my best friend off the face of the universe; not even leaving behind anything for even a simple space burial. No-one should have to die like that.
I hid behind a cargo crate and I yelled, screamed and cried for all it was worth.
A sharp pain in my neck brought me back for an instant then I sunk, further into the black murky depths of unconsciousness.
TBC
