Me: I know it's been a really long time since I updated but I have good reasons! First, I was really busy with school (I'm graduating in a few weeks and going to High School! Yay! Or not) and then I realized that I was probably going to keep taking forever to update so I decided not to update until I was completely done with the story…starting after this chapter XP So now I can update every…whenever I feel like it -.-

Ikuto: You're just lazy and useless.

Me: Ouch.

Utau: You had it coming.

Me: Why??

Utau: THIS IS MY BIG SCENE! AND YOU COMPLETELY NEGLECTED IT TO RAISE YOUR GRADE IN SCIENCE FROM A 'D' SO YOU CAN GRADUATE INTO HIGH SCHOOL FEELING ACCOMPLISHED!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU??

Kukai: …I'd start running if I were you, Hana-chan.

Yoru: Hana-sama doesn't own Shugo Chara!

Ikuto: Since when is she Hana-sama?

Yoru: Since she gave me a years worth of catnip :3

Me: I'm warning you all now: Utau may end up acting a little strange in this chapter, but I wondered what she'd been like as a teacher and this is what I imagined her like.

Utau: -reads script- You've ruined my image as a sweet, caring little girl! I'll kill you!

Me: I told you so. On with the story –runs away-

……………………………………

Recap:

Utau stared at me.

"You don't know?" she asked incredulously.

"Um, no," I said feebly. Utau smiled dangerously, making Kukai, Ikuto and me all take a big step back. Amu however was completely enraptured.

"Then not only will I tell you, I'll teach you," she said. Suddenly I knew exactly what she was talking about.

"Oh no," I whispered. This wasn't going to end well.

CHAPTER FOUR

We were sitting in Utau's apartment listening to her album. Ikuto and Kukai were still trying to stifle their laughter from when Utau first voiced her plan. They would've been laughing like maniacs if it weren't for that fact that we all knew that if they did, they would face the wrath of Utau.

flashback

"The most romantic thing you can do for a girl is sing to her," Utau explained, her purple eyes glowing.

"But I can't sing!" I protested. Utau's grin was feral and all of us—Amu included this time—turned pale, especially me.

"Call me 'sensei' kid," she said and then she dragged me to her place. And so began the lessons.

end flashback

"Let's take it from the top!" Amu cheered, wearing a shirt that said in bright pink letters: GO RIMAHIKO! Before I could ask where the shirt came from in the first place, Utau kicked me. Hard. I winced and rubbed my back.

"Sing, dammit!" she screeched and everyone jumped.

"You should sing now," Kukai advised, looking wearily at his short tempered girlfriend.

"I lo—" I began to sing but Utau began screaming.

"What are you? Tone deaf? Your voice is cracking! You sound like a kid on puberty!" Utau yelled and Ikuto jumped up and left.

"Why'd he leave?" Amu asked Kukai in a whisper.

"I think he lost control," Kukai replied just as quietly and before Amu had the chance to inquire what sort of control Ikuto lost, they heard hysterical laughter coming from the other side of the door.

"Is he laughing at my precious student's singing skills?" Utau roared, suddenly defensive. She seized me in a hug and cradled me like a little kid who had been picked on at the park.

"Um, Utau-sensei? I don't think that—" I tried to say, but my voice was muffled when she squeezed me closer.

"It's okay, my precious student. Ikuto is just jealous that he doesn't have the voice of an angel," she crooned and I felt the lack of air taking its toll on me.

"Utau, I think you're killing him," Kukai noted and I nodded slightly. I didn't want to die before successfully getting my feelings across to Rima.

"Oh! I don't want to ruin your vocal cords anymore than they already are!" the blonde girl said worriedly.

After an hour of endless torture, Utau decided I was ready to "serenade my love to Rima." Whatever that was supposed to mean.

"Are you sure this is going to work, Utau-sensei?" I asked uncertainly and she smacked me.

"You're no longer my pupil so you can quit the 'sensei' and of course it's going to work," Utau said dismissively and kept her brisk pace. I wondered how she even knew where Rima lived.

Please let Utau be a serial killer! Please let her be taking us to some deserted ally way and murder us! Please, please, please! Anything as long as I don't have to sing that song!

"We're here!" Utau said cheerfully and I suddenly felt compelled to puke. Maybe if I did I wouldn't have to sing.

"Don't try anything funny or else," she added dangerously.

So much for that I guess.

I looked around to find someone to back me up, only to see that everyone—including Utau—had vanished.

"Now or never," I mumbled and threw a rock at Rima's window. I wondered where the rock came from until I saw a pile of rocks similar to it in a small pile by a bush. I watched wearily as Amu's hand popped out and another rock rolled over to me. I threw it. This time, Rima opened the window. Her large, beautiful, chocolately, dreamy, adorable, cute, precious, doll-like—I mean, her plain old normal, not-in-any-way-special eyes were widened in surprise.

"What're you doing here?" she asked darkly.

"I, um, wanted to well…" I began wondering how I was supposed to broach the subject.

"Spit it out!" she snapped. I took a deep breath.

"I need to sing you a song," I said and began:

"I love you, you love me
We're a great big family.
With a great big hug
and a kiss from me to you
Won't you say you love me to!"

Rima stared. Then she raised a delicate eyebrow.

"Hm."

"'Hm' what?" I asked desperately. Did she understand.

"Are you going to sing the Sesame Street theme song next?" she asked.

"I could if you want," I said and she rolled her eyes and closed the window.

"It didn't work!" Utau shouted. She glared at me. "There's no hope for you."

"Ouch," I said as I watched her drag Kukai away. He shot us an apologetic look before he was dragged around the corner.

PLAN SERANADE-RIMA: FAILED.

"That was hilarious!" Ikuto laughed as we walked away.

"You're really enjoying this aren't you?" I groaned and he nodded.

"TSUKIYOMI IKUTO!" a familiar voice yelled (A/N guess who!)

"That's me," Ikuto said dryly as Tadase came running over.

"Tadase-kun! Help us!" Amu squealed.

"With what?" he asked looking worried. Amu explained everything to Tadase, including my past failures. I decided that at the rate we were going, all of Japan was going to know I liked Rima.

"That's easy!" Kiseki said haughtily.

"What am I supposed to do?" I moaned and Amu patted my back.

"I have a plan," Tadase and Kiseki said at the same time.

"Where have I heard that one before," I muttered, the words sounding depressingly familiar.

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Me: I don't own Barney. At all. I would've put that at the beginning, but that would've killed the surprise! Also, some of you may be wondering why the hell I put Tadase in this.

Ikuto: Yup.

Me: Well, I really wanted someone to be an epic fail and Tadase is the only one who can do that. Plus…only he could think of what I have planned out for him….MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Tadase: Oh snap.

Ikuto: She finally lost her sanity.

Amu: Review!

Me: Toast! Waffles! Bananas! Reviews! Eggs! Reviews!