Sacrifice
I do not own.
Jacobs Point of View
"What's with the long face?"
I turned my head from the video game that I was playing and looked over to Bella through the corner of my eye as she took a seat on the couch. I had not seen in her a few days since we last met with the Cullen's. After she asked those blood suckers to leave she just disappeared also, now I wonder if she had been hanging out with them the whole time…but she didn't smell like them. So now, I was just confused.
I paused the game and turned around to face her in my swivel chair that Billy had gotten me on my birthday. There were tiny black speakers built into the overstuffed probably over priced black leather, but it fit me and made playing games that much more comfortable.
"My face is no longer than its usual length, where have you been?"
"I had to take some personal time, you know girl things."
"Girl things huh, would it have anything to do with that weird conversation that you never explained with the Cullen's would it?"
"Maybe."
"Maybe is not a good enough answer Bella. What the hell were those blood suckers talking about?"
"Jacob, I don't want to think or talk about it right now. Can we change the subject?"
"Nope."
"Look, it's really no one's business…and it needs to be left in the past."
"How far in the past?"
"Look, if you're not going to drop it I can just leave."
"No you look Bella, I have argued tooth and nail with everyone here about how you're different but it's none of their business, I cannot keep protecting you if you keep having all of these damn secrets. I get it right, really I do…everyone's got a secret… but you are carrying a trunk of secrets."
"And they need to stay that way."
I had never heard Bella really raise her voice until just now when she spoke. I saw nothing in her eyes; the warm chocolate brown was replaced with a coal black that made me even more curious as to what the hell I was dealing with. She was my best friend but she needed to come clean on a few things, I wasn't asking her to make an announcement but at least I needed to know so that I could protect her.
I stood up quickly using my speed to try and catch her off guard. She had stood up with her back turned to me and was heading towards the front door. I was not about to let her leave without this conversation being finished. She had done that too many times and enough was enough.
I placed my hand on her shoulder and pulled her back gently, her head twisted slightly as her eyes shot daggers into my face and her hand moved to mine, it seemed that her speed was quicker than a normal human, another item for me to add to the freaky shit that Bella does.
She was fast enough that I didn't even feel my body flying in the air until I had actually hit the wall of my house. She sighed and ran her fingers through her hair as I stood up and questioned my sanity on not changing right then and there. Who knew she was so strong also? There was a lot more to her than she had been letting on and now I wasn't confused I was getting pissed.
"What the fuck Bella?"
"Don't curse at me and just let me leave."
"You just threw me across the living room…"
"Jacob, I'm leaving."
"No, you are going to sit your ass down and start talking Bella, don't make me force you."
A deep sadistic chuckle escaped her lips as she shook her head and turned towards the door again. I couldn't shift now, not without alerting the entire pack of what was going on; and as mad as I may be with Bella right now, she was still my best friend and I didn't want the world to know her secrets until she was ready to tell them herself.
She placed her hand on the front door and threw open before stepping out on the front porch. I followed silently behind her, and in the first time in I don't know how many years we had been friends I got a creepy chill that she knew exactly where I was and how much pressure I had been putting on each foot. The more I was seeing in this very moment the less I liked and something told me that if I kept pushing I was going to see a lot more.
Her movements took on a different pace than what I had experience in the few seconds that she had let her true self come out; I didn't know whether this argument was over in my head or not at the present time. I wanted to demand answers, but was right her and right now the right place to do that? Surely I had been known to cause a scene but wasn't it Bella who normally calmed me down with a single touch of her cold fingers? We were like fire and ice, but at this moment… I felt like I needed more from her.
I know nothing about her kind, or what evil past she is trying so desperately to keep hidden, it's not like I would judge her, and we all had our own little quirks. But she wouldn't even give me an inch. She knew everything about me, I held no secrets from her and yet I still can't win.
I followed her out on to the porch and over to the dirt road where she continued walking at a slow human pace, though I was beginning to lean towards the obvious choice that she was not human, I don't know what kind of sacrifice it must be for her to tell me these secrets, but I wasn't worried about any kind of danger to myself or the tribe, we had things covered pretty tightly around here.
She could let me in, I could be her warmth, but she held back…and that was not fair to either one of us. I mentally began kicking myself for sounding like a selfish pansy that was in love with the girl, but the fact of the matter was she was my best friend, and the closest any girl had ever gotten to me, so she must understand to some degree why I feel the need to have this information.
I stopped trying to convince myself to have her sacrifice her secrets and let me have my peace of mind, instead I opted to follow her wherever she was heading to, I knew that I could find that fire in her eyes; I was willing to go all the way, but each step she took in another direction my mind scream get away from me… please.
When I first met Bella, her beauty took the breath right out of me. And when I didn't feel that pull that my brothers had described when they found there one it broke my heart and left a hole where it once was. I figured she was still something worth fighting for…we could be friends and make it through this.
Then when she discovered what I was…I have to admit that I was slightly worried that I could be the death of her. Too add salt to my already opened wound my brothers didn't like her, not her personality but the weird quirks that surrounded her. So I stuck up for her in the same way she defended out friendship when I told her to leave because I could hurt her. She laughed at me then, and would probably laugh at me now if she could read my mind.
"Bella let me in."
"Jacob, I can't just let you in…it's complicated."
"What's the big deal? I'm different…I know your different I just don't know how much different you are."
Bella turned on her heal and headed into the woods. Once we were in clearance of the trees her pace quickened and her breathing became so silent I was almost positive that she had stopped breathing period.
"Is it because of what I am?"
Her body stopped moving as her head turned in my direction and her eyes once again pierced through me. This wasn't the fire I was used to, this wasn't the playful about to get me Bella, this was a more serious Bella who wasn't about to budge. There was a look of guilt and pain across her face before she crossed her arms in front of her chest.
"Jacob, I'm waiting for you to realize and start hating me. I don't care what you are but you will care about me."
"You're right."
"I am?"
"Yes, except for one minor detail, I already do care about you Bella, you take my breath away and you are my best friend. Look, I understand that we have been over this whole we can't be a couple thing…but I still care about you and that matters, so what's the big deal in telling your best friend your secrets? That's what I am supposed to be here for right?"
"Jacob you won't understand."
"I won't because you won't let me. Shit Bella stop with the bull shit and just spit it out!"
I know I should have raised my voice, but the growl that came from her when I again tried to bring her slightly closer to me was something I didn't even expect to escape her lips. She was so delicate looking. Lesson learned looks are not what they seem.
Her hands came up and slammed against my chest as I went flying towards a tree. She almost advanced on me, I saw the hesitation in her footsteps but she stopped. What in the world was with her? I didn't smell blood so this couldn't be her time of the month, and I didn't feel that I had been crossing any lines.
"Bella, what the fuck…do that again and we are going to have a real fight."
She laughed, she out right laughed at me before she turned to again walk away. To shift or not to shift was the only thought running across my mind at the present time. How important was finding out her secret to me? Was it worth the friendship that we had built up over the years? Then again, what kind of friendship did we have if she couldn't be one hundred percent honest with me?
I took a step closer to her before my mind moved into another direction and the rustle of leaves underneath my feet made Bella stop, her head turned slightly as she glanced at me through the corner of her eye.
"Bella, you are going to stay here and work this out with me. No more secrets and no more just walking away when you feel like it."
"Jacob now is not a good time for me."
"It's as good of a time as any Bella, you got to stop running."
"I'm not running, clearly I am walking away and I suggest that you stop following me."
"Where are you going?"
"Home."
"Then let me take you home…we can talk there."
"Jacob I am not having this discussion with you."
"Bella, yes you are."
"You don't want to fight with me Jacob, please just leave it alone."
Now it was my turn to laugh, she may have had strength but I was stronger, and she may have been quicker than I originally thought, but I was quicker. One eye brow quirked on her delicate oval shaped face as I continued to laugh at her assumption about fighting with me. She wouldn't hurt me, and I would make sure I didn't hurt her, if it came to that.
"Bella, I don't want to fight, so I suggest you take the easy road and just spit it out."
"You can be really cocky sometimes, you know that?"
"What? You think you can take me? Prove it princess."
I shifted quickly which would probably cause me some muscle pain later but it was worth it to see the surprised look on her face as I slammed into the side of her knocking her to the ground successfully. I placed my hands on the tops of her shoulders applying a gentle pressure to let her know that she was pinned.
Bella smirked right before she growled and pushed on my chest throwing me back into the air. I landed on the hard dirt surface with a thud but didn't stay there long enough to see what she had planned next. The rest of the pack was fully aware of my shifting, but I kept the thoughts detailing the reasons to myself. I simply sent out a warning to leave me alone and to stay away. Being able to link our thoughts together was a great defense if we ever had to go into battle, but right now it was a nuisance.
Bella had lifted herself off the ground and crouched into a waiting position for me to attack her again. I could see her muscles coil under her shirt as the jeans she wore barely stretched enough to give her the leg room she needed to properly defend herself. At least now I knew who my new sparring partner would be, if she could take a hit like that I should at least teach her how to defend herself properly if needed. Not now of course, now I had to prove that she wasn't as bad ass as she thought she was.
I leaned all of my weight forward as I ran towards planning to slam into her but she side stepped me, definitely quicker than I thought she was. I couldn't really provide any commentary past the few growls or howl I had already, but I knew that she knew me well enough to know that I was talking shit. I could see it in her eyes as she watched me.
Each time I took a step closer and prepared to attack her again she moved just inches out of my reach. I was beginning to get frustrated, I felt like a damn fool trying to catch a chicken like the little kids on the ranch would. This was ridiculous and I could not be out done by Bella of all people. It was a large gouge to my ego.
I rushed on her again but this time she didn't just moved out of the way. Instead one small foot stepped onto my leg as her other leg wrapped around my waste and head came dangerously close to my neck. She paused as her hands moved to ears and suddenly a lot of really strange things began to make a lot of sense.
"Do you ever take a bath in this form Jacob? You stink…"
I began the process of shifting down; of course I would stink to her. She climbed off of me and took up the same stance before the rest of this had even begun. Her arms were crossed in front of her chest and her hip was cocked out with her foot nervously tapping against the ground. I knew, she knew I knew, and now she was nervous about what I was about to say to her. Was she still my Bella?
"Bella, how?"
