A/N: Hope you guys enjoy, the story should be moving along a little faster now. Don't be shy, leave me some updates if you're reading!

Disclaimer: I own nothing, not the book, movie, songs or lyrics.

Rating: T to M for adult themes/language

Flight 5107

Chapter Six: like a heartbeat drives you mad

EPOV

I'm a mean vampire. I really am. I shouldn't have been so elated to see the hurt look on her face, but she deserved every bit of it. She was the most difficult, most insufferable, yet most infallible and lovely creature I'd ever laid eyes on.

How could she think that I regretted saving her? That was the best thing I had done…it took the utmost strength and will for me, and she couldn't see that. She obviously did think of me as a monster. Rightfully so, I suppose.

I started back towards our campsite, fully aware of her presence behind me.

Esme's disapproving face flashed in front of my eyes. Damn my conscience. I thought vampires weren't supposed to be able to feel guilt or sympathy. Wrong again.

I whipped around and walked back to a still shell-shocked Bella sitting in the same position I'd left her. Her face was full of indignation and strife. I am an awful being. I extended my hand towards her and couldn't blame her when she did not take it immediately.

"I won't drop you. Come on, it's getting dark."

She grabbed my peace offering, causing me immense searing pain with her touch, and lifted herself off the cold floor. She promptly dropped my hand and walked slowly beside me, not making eye contact. She was a proud one, this girl. She dropped back a few steps behind me, and I fought the urge to take her hand and drag her through the jungle. I had always had little patience with human pace…I was the fastest in my family and had never had to slow myself down.

A sniffle.

God, was she crying? Did I make her cry?

"Are you crying?" I echoed my thoughts.

She sniffed and hid her face from me. She fought the heaves that were threatening to overtake her frail body.

I sighed and she took that as a sign of my annoyance towards her. She brushed the glistening droplets from her face and continued pace beside me. We made it to the clearing in minutes and then the real awkwardness set in, as neither of us knew what to do. I heard her stomach growl and felt relieved that there was something that could eat up time. Literally.

I sat down on a log and pulled out another fish from my stash, and speared it onto a sharpened twig. Starting another fire, I noticed that she hadn't moved from her position above me. Was she just going to stand there?

I held out the fish for her to take. She didn't.

"I know you're hungry…the whole island knows you're hungry," I snickered, causing her to scowl. Now I actually was irritated with her.

Her face was hard and adamant, but eventually she reluctantly began to dismantle the fish with her delicate fingers. She stopped when she realized I wasn't making one for myself.

"Not hungry," I answered her silent question. Again, she took this as a sign of my irritation. She huffed, but then ate the entire fish…damn…as if to prove a point. How long was she going to keep this silent treatment up, because two could play at that game.

She suddenly looked down at herself and gasped. I followed her line of vision, her dress was half ripped from her body, showing the silky material of a full length slip and ghastly pale skin in some places underneath where the fabric had been ripped away. Didn't look that bad to me, but I surmised that she felt very exposed and very vulnerable. What all that skin would it look like exposed I wondered. I inwardly groaned. It was going to be a long, long night beside her.

Well, it would be had I planned to stay beside her.

I stood up and brushed the nonexistent sand from my pants. She implored me with her eyes.

"Bathroom." Humans had to do that, right?

Instead I raced through the jungle to the wreckage and pulled as many scraps of blankets and fabric that I could salvage, for Bella's makeshift bed. Upon my return her eyes just widened at all the stuff stacked in my arms. We wordlessly organized two little makeshift sleeping areas around the fire. I swear she seemed disappointed as I set up my little bed on the other side of the pit. She climbed into her little improvised sleeping bag and tucked herself up to her chin. I could tell she was already fatigued from the day's events…and she had been unconscious for half of it.

She quickly drew deep breaths and I knew she was asleep. I was more tortured than ever now, as I sat beside her, watching her sleep. She wasn't talking to me. And while I tried to convince myself that this was a great thing, that this would save her from me, I couldn't believe it. I wanted her to talk to me because I wanted to know everything there was to know about her. I knew the superficial stuff about her job and her friends, but I wanted to know Bella Swan. The real Bella Swan. She was hiding all of that precious information from me as punishment.

Her body thrashed about suddenly as a nightmare wreaked havoc on her subconscious. Her arms flailed as she spoke clearly as if she were awake, "Edward, don't leave me."

I won't leave you, my love. Now that I've found you, where else could I possibly go?

"Charlie, Renee…" she murmured in her REM trance. I felt like I was going insane, having to watch her body twist and turn as her bad dreams overtook her. I wished with every fiber of my being that I could sleep so that I didn't have to bear witness to this tragedy in front of me. If I could dream I know it would be of her. She looked like she was in so much pain. And I couldn't do a damn thing to stop it. No, rather, I was egging her on, causing more pain with my very existence, like the monster I was.

"Jacob no, no! NO! Don't hurt him…" she tossed and turned and once again I found myself wanting to physically damage this Jacob asshole, how nice it would be to tear his limbs from his body.

When I was assured that she was in the deep stages of sleep, I made a quick survey of the island. Once some of the small animals that may have been considered dangers were eliminated, I threw myself into the crashing breakers and began to swim. The water was churning all around me, the riptides getting stronger with every stroke. That must be a sign of another coming storm. I'd have to figure out some way to build a more permanent structure as shelter for Bella and me.

Bella and me. That sounded nice.

It took more a mere sixty seconds before I reached land again. I swept across it, letting the quickness of my running motion dry my off completely. Nope, no people…but some more tasty critters on which I feasted. I was a total disgusting glutton, but I couldn't be safe enough for Bella. Next island. I continued island jumping, never finding one person amongst the dozen or so I visited, until I knew that dawn would be soon upon us. I searched the sky for the sun, but could only see it retreat behind the thick ceiling of clouds. Good, I had at least another day before I had to actually explain my very startling appearance in sunlight.

I leaned down close to her when I returned, taking a huge whiff of her scent. Ugh, it burned my throat in such blistering pain. This had to be done though if I wanted to desensitize myself. I slipped into my blankets, pretending I was asleep just as she rustled around in hers. I hid my half-closed eyes underneath my unruly hair and watched as she yawned and stretched out. She peered over at my side of the camp, and looked relieved that I wasn't yet awake. Her hair stuck out into a million different directions, the victim of a restless night. She took some strands in her fingers, sniffed them and made an expression of pure repugnancy that made me stifle a laugh so hard I thought I would choke.

I turned the other way in my bed before she could catch on and shut my eyes hard. I heard her footsteps inch closer to my body as she checked if I were really asleep. She tiptoed away from our campsite, creeping into the trees. Great, now I would have to "wake up" and go find her again when she got lost. Her breathing was slow and deliberate like she was trying not to make a sound, but she wasn't really aware I had very keen senses. She flitted through the jungle, a blanket in hand, somehow not tripping and falling in the process. She deserved more credit than I allotted to her. I counted to thirty quickly in my head then followed her in, flying soundless up the trees to get a better peripheral view of where she was going.

She stopped at various trees and plants as if she were looking at place markers. Her head pointed upwards as she followed a familiar sound that took her right to the small lake with the picturesque waterfall I'd seen before while exploring the island. She tested the water with her bare foot, and then took a timid step in, her back to me.

No! Was this girl an idiot? There could be dangers lurking beneath those waters…or it could be too deep or have quicksand. Maybe she was trying to kill herself? Or kill me in the process? I watched in horror as she took a few more steps into the water.

She was almost waist deep in water when a quick gesture sent a quick breath into the depth of my lungs. The wet wadded up fabric hit the surface of a rock with a thwack and if I could blush, I'd probably match the exact red color of the lace. Oh god. I suddenly felt like a pervert…a peeping tom…a disgusting voyeur as I imagined myself down there with her, touching her between her bare legs…

Stop.

The things I would do to her. Things that I'd only ever seen in other people's minds and not actually my own. I replaced other females in the fantasies that had so littered my mind through the thoughts of others with Bella, thinking about all of the glorious skin and the kisses and the heat. I craved that heat. It didn't matter that I couldn't do it because her bones would snap into pieces. In my mind I could do it...I could do her.

The invasion of privacy I was always so privy to was really perverted. Humans were disgusting, but Vampires could be even worse with their all-consuming thoughts of sex. Thank God Emmett wasn't here, or I wouldn't hear the end of it. And I'm sure he'd probably be thinking the exact same lascivious thoughts about Bella that I was…which would make me lunge at his throat, giving my hiding place away. I hated myself for having little experience to drawn upon…but I really hated myself for not being able to stop watching her.

I didn't care if the water was unsafe at this point. Hell, maybe it would wash some of her scent off. I just wanted her to keep stripping. She crawled deeper into the water, peeling off her dress as the water reached the top of her chest. She tossed it over to shore in one fall swoop and I almost died of happiness if it were possible. Black lace flew through the air as her breasts were unfettered. Those delicious curves bare naked underneath that water. God. Help. Me.

She submerged her head underwater briefly. She shook out her wet hair which now clung to her white flesh in a long heavy curtain. She slowly washed herself, a strange lusty expression on her face. I felt some unfamiliar stirrings deep inside me. Strange desire washed over me, an uncomfortable feeling settling between my legs. It was a low simmering ache, a throbbing arousal. She rubbed her skin as best she could to rid it of some of the dirt and blood that had stuck to her since the crash. She winced as she cleaned her body, slowing rising out of the water.

Yes. Please turn around.

She didn't. I saw the glorious under curve of her ample breasts, perky and perfectly round. She had a nicely rounded behind and I traced my eyes up her back over the luscious contour of her abdomen. I softly gasped as I saw telltale marks on her back. Her whole middle back and shoulder blades were bruised, the purplish tints slowly melding to yellowish-green splotches. They formed the perfect images of where I held her tight as we jumped off the plane. It dawned on me more than ever now. I had physically hurt her. She was covered in contusions because of my monstrous power.

I hopped down the tree and rushed back to the campsite as quickly as I could. I was ashamed enough for one morning, ashamed enough to damn me for another eternity.

---

When she returned, I'd already laid out some fruit I'd gathered yesterday. She had put on her slip only and wrapped herself in the blanket. She ate in silence and stared at me from across the pit. She didn't say anything, didn't meet my gaze as if she knew I'd spied on her like the creep I was. She didn't say anything. She was probably as disgusted with me as I was at myself, revolted by the bruises I'd left on her body.

I got up, the silent judging making me suddenly very uncomfortable. I walked along the beach very much aware that she was following closely behind. When she started to figure out where we were going, her steps quickened until she was right beside me. I'd scattered the various items I was able to save from the plane across the beach, so that if someone were to find us, they wouldn't be suspicious. Her body shook as she took in the sight of our former vessel, lifeless in the water. The tears came flooding out of her eyes as she crouched on the ground.

Her body was flushed as I knelt down beside her and put my hand on her back slowly. I had to go very slowly. I gave her a few encouraging pats when she looked into my eyes and fell into my arms in one heap of sobs. The pain was electric…so much that it no longer felt like pain, only the greatest pleasure. I closed my arms around her, making sure I wouldn't crush her blood vessels this time. I missed having her in my arms.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

I put a finger to her lips and relished the heat her breath imparted on my lucky finger. "So now someone decides to talk."

"You dropped me," she retorted, smiling a small delicate smile.

"You deserved it."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I'm sorry, too." I tried to rise up to standing position, but she unexpectedly grabbed my hand sending a shock through my system.

"No, I shouldn't have said that, I was a real brat there, not appreciating what you did. You saved me. And I pushed you away by saying all that stuff. I didn't mean it." She pulled me down next to her, leaning her head on my shoulder.

Yes you did. Yes you should. Just like you should be repelled from me right now.

"It's fine, really. We've been through a lot. No one will hold it against you if you feel angry or upset or sad, least of all me." Her aroma tickled my throat wickedly, but I pushed the thought out. I would not let the monster ruin this moment for me.

"The only thing I'm sad about is how much you must hate me."

I cupped her chin in my hands carefully, "I don't hate you. Please know that. I'm an ass, I shouldn't have dropped you." I let go of her soft skin having tested myself too much this morning. I ran my hand through my hair to distract the nerves with different sensations, making her inhale sharply.

"Edward?" she said timidly. "I wouldn't want to be here with anyone else, and I hope that you don't leave me alone. Please don't leave me, okay?"

"Well, where else would I go?" I reassured her and myself. I placed my forehead against hers.

Her eyes glistened with a fresh batch of tears, but I thought I saw something else there as I lowered my face to be on par with hers. What was it, love or lust? I hoped it was both because those two feelings were swirling around in the empty pit where my heart used to beat.

"Look, I don't know how long we'll be here, but let's just start over okay? I'm Edward Cullen, and you're Bella Swan and we are going to make the most of this island. We have to make the most of this second chance and try not to kill each other," I smiled, the agony of irony hanging over my words.

I returned to my feet and held out my hand to her. She looked up at me with the most heartbreaking expression of loss and sadness as she whispered, "Thank you."

"Bella," I said, my voice serious, "I don't want you wandering into the jungle by yourself. You don't know what could be in there. I'd much rather you wait for me. I think it'll be safer and I'll at least feel more at ease."

"So you noticed I was gone…" she smiled wickedly sending my thoughts into a frenzy.

"Yes, it scared me half to death when you weren't there when I woke…" I lied seamlessly.

"Seems like you got a taste of your own medicine. Anyway, you get to go in there by yourself." Interesting, not only was her body bruised, but her ego was as well.

"I'm pretty sure I can fight anything that comes my way off…you, not so sure. Although, you do have a mighty strong right jab," I laughed, rubbing at my nonexistent injury. She snickered.

"Sorry, but I had to take a bath. I felt so disgusting."

"I know the feeling." I did.

"Well I think the water was too cold anyhow, I'm still feeling a little chilly."

I automatically rubbed my hands against her blanket covered shoulders, trying to force heat from my freezing cold extremities in vain. I tipped her chin up towards my face again and her brows knitted together.

"You look different." She cocked her head as she tried to figure it out. "I got it! Are your eyes black?" I didn't answer, but she didn't press it.

We walked together in silence, our thoughts like a cloud over us. As the items strewn across the beach increased, Bella's brow etched in deep concentration as she looked from the plane to the beach. She was starting to wonder.

She was distracted as she gripped my hand to keep from stumbling over a rock, and I didn't let go. I didn't want to. Now that a lot things were out in the open, my feelings were the inevitable next secret to come out.

"Edward, you're freezing. Are you sure you're feeling okay?" I wondered why she hadn't brought this up earlier, but she must have forgotten like I just did.

"Oh, I'm fine, I always run a little cold. You're full of questions aren't you? Good thing we have time…"

"Hmm…how did…" she trailed off as a strange expression crossed her face. She dropped my hand and stumbled away, her hand outstretched as if she were going to fall.

"Bella?" She lurched forward, her hands hitting the sand before I could get to her. Her body shook furiously as she projected her breakfast onto the sand. Her hand moved to her abdomen, as she let her body collapse onto the sand.


Inspired by Dreams by Fleetwood Mac, High and Dry by Radiohead, Shiver by Coldplay, Pain by Jimmy Eat World